Embracing Juliette (Texas Heroes: Station 9 #1)

Chapter 15

15

Dylan

“ Y ou got the list?” I asked Ryan as we loaded our gear into the station’s SUV and headed out to the grocery store. If a call came in while we were out, we’d have everything we needed to go directly to the call and meet the rest of the crew.

“Yep, it’s all the usual. Liam just added the ingredients for beef stew.”

Liam grew up helping out at his parents’ restaurant and we all reaped the benefits of his expertise.

We parked close and went in, nodding a greeting to the manager at customer service as we entered. They knew us well here. A couple of the crew came in during each shift to buy enough to last the three days, plus to restock the staples. If a call came in, we’d leave the cart at customer service, and they knew to hold it in the walk-in fridge until we returned for it.

Ryan and I made our way efficiently through the store. Our tastes were simple and leaned towards the healthy side. Chicken, burgers, eggs, bacon, and frozen veggies were staples every shift. The rest varied depending on who was cooking. I didn’t mind being on shopping duty. Better than clean up.

Fuck. I stopped short in the bread aisle. Kayla was there.

It was too late to turn around. She’d already seen me, and her sneer said this wasn’t going to be pretty.

She looked like a mess. She usually looked perfectly put-together, but now her blond hair was stringy and her lips, normally pink and plump, were dry and bare. Her clothes looked like they were meant to fit tight, but they hung off her too-thin frame.

“Hello, Kayla,” I said as pleasantly as possible. Ryan’s snicker told me I’d failed.

“Wow, it’s our city’s heroes. Good to see you living your dream. Grocery shopping to save the world. This is what you gave up our lives for?”

“Have a good day, Kayla.” I tried to steer around her, but she turned her cart to block the aisle.

“That’s all you have to say to me?”

“I don’t have time for this. We need to finish and get back. Move your cart. Now.” I couldn’t keep the irritation out of my voice. She could still push my buttons.

“Go. I’ve already wasted enough time on you. I have a new boyfriend now, and he takes better care of me than you ever did.”

My eyes were drawn to her fingers twitching nervously on the handle of her cart. Her manicure was chipped, her cuticles picked. The back of my neck tingled.

“Lucky you.” I drew the words out, debating if I should voice the worries building in my gut.

“I am lucky. I thought you wanted the same things I did, but you had your head in the clouds with your kumbaya-save-the- world bullshit. Leo puts me first. His dreams are all about living the good life with me.”

“Enough,” Ryan growled. He moved around me and pushed Kayla’s cart over, leaving her no option but to move with it or be sandwiched against the shelf. He grabbed the front of our cart and pulled it, dragging me along.

“Goodbye, Kayla,” I said as we passed.

“Fuck, why are you still so polite to her? The woman is batshit crazy,” Ryan spit out.

“I can hear you, asshole!”

Ryan didn’t even grace her with a response. You got to respect his give-no-shits attitude.

We finished the rest of the shopping quickly. I grabbed anything that looked good and threw it in the cart. I’d cover the extra cost if we went over the budget. I just wanted to get the hell out of there without another confrontation.

I knew the answer to Ryan’s question, even though I’d never voice it aloud. I was polite to her because I still felt guilty about our relationship, how our demise had also seemed to be Kayla’s personal demise. I’d made promises, then reneged on all of them. Kayla married the man I led her to believe I wanted to be. We never should’ve gotten married in the first place, and we shouldn’t have stayed together after it was clear we weren’t happy together. I’d realized early on in the marriage that we didn’t love each other the way a husband and wife should. I ignored my gut for too long, but eventually I had no choice but to either listen to it or accept that I’d never be happy. I wished she would also move on and be happy, for both of our sakes, but instead, she was in worse shape each time I saw her.

Back in the car, I felt the need to defend Kayla to Ryan. “She wasn’t always like that. She has reason to be pissed at me. I did bait and switch her, but not on purpose.”

“That’s bullshit. I have no doubt you treated her like a fucking queen, whether you were a banker or a fireman. She was damn lucky to have you, and she threw you away and replaced you with a motherfucker.”

The tingling on the back of my neck returned. I appreciated Ryan’s support, but there was no reason for him to be that fired up. Unless he was having the same suspicions as me.

“What’s up, brother?”

“Did you see the finger marks on her arm? Someone grabbed her hard enough to leave bruises. I’m guessing it was her precious Leo.”

“Fuck.” I hated that for her, but what could I do? I was the last person she’d ever confide in or turn to for help. “Did you also get the impression that she may have been on something?”

“Yep.”

Fuck.

The rest of the day passed slowly. I had no idea how to handle Kayla. I couldn’t just ignore what we saw. It was Brady who had the brilliant idea of calling a mutual friend.

I scrolled through my contacts and clicked on Evan’s name. It rang once, twice, three times. We were friendly, but the main connection was between Kayla and his wife. He might not even have my number anymore, or he might just not answer.

“Hello?”

“Evan, it’s Dylan Larke.”

“Of course, how are you, man? It’s been a long time.”

“I’m good, how about you?”

“I’m good. What’s new?”

“I was hoping to talk to you and Jill about something with Kayla. Is Jill available?”

“Sure, she’s here. I’ll put it on speaker.” I heard the hesitation in his voice, but luckily he didn’t question me. If he knew what I was about to ask of his wife, he might not have put her on the phone.

“Hi, Dylan!” An unexpected pang hit my chest at the familiarity in Jill’s cheerful greeting. She’d been Kayla’s friend in college, and we’d all spent a lot of time together back when things were easy.

“Hey, Jill! How are you? How’s life been these last few years?”

“Great! Things are really good. What’s going on?”

“Have you seen Kayla lately? I ran into her this morning, and I got a bad vibe from her.”

“Not really. I only saw her once a few months ago. Remember my roommate, Hailey? We were both at her baby shower, and she was... How do I describe her? Loud, inappropriate, jittery, like she was filled with nervous energy.”

“Yeah. Did she mention a boyfriend?”

“Leo. Is she still with that asshole?”

“Yep. What do you know about him?”

“She made a few comments about his opinions on her weight and the dress she was wearing—which was very short and tight—and she was nervous that he’d be angry if she didn’t go home right after the shower. He sounded controlling and manipulative.”

Shit. I knew what Ryan and I had seen, but I’d hoped that somehow Jill would have an explanation to prove us wrong.

“Oh,” she continued. “She also bragged about the jewelry he bought for her, but when someone asked what he did, she got mad at her for asking. Sounded very shady.”

“Dylan, what’s going on?” Evan asked.

“I’m not sure. Like I said, I ran into her today, just for a few minutes at the grocery store, but nothing Jill said is surprising. I don’t know anything for a fact, but I think she’s in over her head.”

“You think she’s using?”

“Yeah. Maybe. And I think Leo might be physical with her.”

“Damn, I hate that for her. What can I do?” Jill said.

“Nothing,” Evan said firmly. “Dylan, Jill isn’t putting her ass on the line for her.”

“I know, I would never ask that. But maybe just a phone call? Reach out and see if she needs anything?”

“Yeah, I can do that.”

“I don’t know,” Evan said.

“Ev, it’ll be fine,” Jill said. “A phone call can’t hurt anything. She was a really good friend for a long time.”

“I’d appreciate that, Jill.”

“You’re a good guy for still looking out for her.”

I didn’t feel like a good guy. I felt like an asshole. “I just hate to see her like this. She’s nothing like the woman I used to know. I know a phone call isn’t much, but it’s worth a shot. There’s no way she’d talk to me, but maybe she’ll listen to you. Sometimes planting a seed of hope, or giving support to someone who wants out but feels helpless, can be the push they need.”

“You know it’s not your fault, right?”

“Yeah. That’s what everyone tells me.” I smiled, a picture of Juliette popping into my head.

“It’s really not. She’s a big girl who makes her own decisions. I’ll call her, though, see if a little tough love from an old friend can get through to her.”

“That’s it, though. You’re not going to see her,” Evan said firmly. “If she’s on drugs, she could be unpredictable. And I don’t want you near this Leo character.”

“I know,” Jill reassured him.

“Thanks. I really appreciate it. Let me know if you need anything.”

“I will. It was really good to talk to you, Dylan. Let’s keep in touch.”

“Definitely,” I said even though I knew we wouldn’t. “Be well, guys.”

I felt better. It wasn’t perfect, and I hated that Jill’s thoughts confirmed my worries, but it was the best I could do considering Kayla would barely talk to me. There was a much greater chance that she’d open up to Jill. Satisfied that I did what I could to help, it was time to stop worrying about the woman who belonged in my past and focus on the woman I hoped would be my future.

Perfect timing. Juliette knocked on the door just as I put the lasagna in the oven. I opened the door with a giant grin on my face. I was too happy to care if I looked goofy.

Juliette walked in and came straight into my arms.

“Hi, baby.”

“Hi, Dylan.”

I released her to lock the door, then held her hand and led her in. She looked beautiful, as always, but different in her work clothes. She looked elegant in the gray slacks and cream-colored blouse with little ruffles on the sleeves.

“You look like a sexy substitute teacher.”

“Not a sexy OT?”

“The sexiest OT. But you’re the first OT I’ve ever fantasized about.”

I laughed as she fidgeted with the hem of her blouse, and I kissed her the way I’d been dying to do. I pulled away long before I was ready. She wanted more, too, if the way she tried to hold onto me was any indication.

“Dinner will be ready in an hour. Do you want to go put your stuff in my room and get comfortable?”

She nodded and we walked into the bedroom. I stood in the doorway, watching her as she placed her duffel bag on top of my dresser. She took a toiletry bag into the bathroom and left it in the corner of the counter. I imagined her naked in my bathroom. Shaving, rubbing lotion on her legs. I adjusted myself, futilely hoping she wouldn’t notice. She returned to the bedroom and looked in her bag. It felt strange that I wished she’d unpack a little. Not that she needed to for just a few days, but the thought of her clothes in my closet gave me a weird feeling of rightness.

“Do you want to change into something more comfortable?”

“Yeah.” She watched me for a moment. “Um, can you leave?” she asked nervously.

“Yeah, I’ll leave. But only because after you change, I plan on sitting on the couch with you, rubbing your feet, or maybe your back. I’ll let you choose. I bought a bottle of Riesling, so we can have a glass of your favorite wine while you tell me all about your day. I made a salad, lasagna, and garlic bread so I can impress you with my culinary skills. Then, after dinner we’re going to come back in here, and that time, I’m going to undress you myself. How does that sound?”

Juliette’s gorgeous honey-colored eyes grew wide, a pretty pink blush spreading over her cheeks. “Um, we can skip to that last part now if you want.”

“No way, I have a whole night planned for us.” I gave her a quick peck on the lips, then turned and quickly walked out of the room before I couldn’t make myself leave.

I was figuring out the puzzle that was Juliette, and now there was nothing holding me back from moving forward with her. It was crystal clear when we were on the phone—she responded to me responding to her. She was turned on by knowing that I was turned on by her. She seemed almost surprised by my response to her, and that pissed me off. I wanted to find whatever asshole made her doubt herself and punch him in the face. She was fucking perfect just the way she was.

She didn’t need me to shower her with pretty words or to hold back for the sake of moving slowly. She needed to know how badly I wanted her. It would be my absolute pleasure and honor to show Juliette how she turned me on.

I heard my bedroom door open and Juliette’s soft footsteps coming towards the living room. I watched from the couch as she nervously walked over, looking beautiful in her leggings and fitted t-shirt, her hair in a messy bun.

“I hope you don’t mind that I’m not dressed for dinner. After work I can’t wait to get undressed and put on comfy clothes.”

“You look great. I love seeing you relaxed in my home.” I patted the couch to beckon her over.

She smiled as she sat, and I handed her a glass of wine. I picked up my glass too and tipped it towards hers for a toast. “To many more nights together.”

“I like the sound of that.”

“Foot or back rub?”

“Back. Definitely. My feet are ticklish.”

“I’m going to remember that,” I teased.

I turned sideways on the couch, one leg straight, one foot on the floor, making room for Juliette in front of me. She perched at the edge and slid back into the vee of my legs. I was going to pull her in even closer and leave her with no doubt what touching her, hearing her, did to me, but not just yet.

“I’m glad you’re here, baby.” I ran my hands gently up and down her arms, then settled on her shoulders and gave a squeeze.

“Mmm, me too. That feels good.”

I rubbed her shoulders and back, loving how she melted under my touch, and then she gave me what I was waiting for. A sweet little moan. I slid my hands down her sides, digging my thumbs into the muscles of her back and letting my fingertips glide over the curves of her breasts. She gasped and leaned into me, and that’s when I pulled her back, her ass firmly against my throbbing dick, the pressure a sweet torture.

“Juls,” I groaned.

I continued the massage, kneading into her back, lingering at the base of her spine, my fingertips teasing over the curves of her hips, and up, grazing the edges of her tantalizing tits while she rewarded me with the sexiest little mewls.

Beep. Beep. Beep.

“Damn lasagna,” Juliette muttered.

I held her against me as I laughed. I kissed her just behind her ear, before whispering, “Soon, baby. Let’s go eat.”

The disgruntled way she trudged to the kitchen made me laugh again. If she was reluctant for dinner for any other reason, I’d be disappointed, but there was nothing I wanted more than to continue what we’d started, and it was fucking fantastic that she felt the same.

Over dinner, we talked about work and our friends and families, the conversation flowing easily as we both enjoyed the food.

“Are you almost done with school for the year?” I asked.

“No, the special education schools are year round. I just have a little time before and after summer school.”

“Bummer. I was hoping we’d have more time together.”

Juliette’s face lit up like a kid on Christmas. She was adorable. So easy to please.

“Can I ask you something?” she said.

“Of course, always.”

“Why is it so important to you to have the doors locked?”

“Common sense?”

“No, it’s more than that. What is it?”

“I see so much fucked up shit every day. Husbands and wives, moms and dads and kids, going about their business, thinking that at the end of the day they’ll all get to see each other again. But too often, one doesn’t make it home. A car accident, a heart attack, a carjacking, or burglary gone bad. There’s so much scary shit that can happen that’s out of anyone’s control. So why not control the things that we can?”

“That makes sense.”

“I know. I also know that you have a fire extinguisher, smoke detectors, and carbon monoxide detectors.”

“You snooped around my house for safety equipment?” She laughed.

I smiled unapologetically. “I almost tested all your detectors, too, but I didn’t want you to think I was crazy that early in our relationship.”

“You can test them if it makes you happy. I don’t know if I’ve ever tested them.”

“I will. It’s important to me that you’re safe.”

Juliette’s entire face glowed along with her golden honey eyes. “You’re very sweet.”

How did her happiness have a direct link to my dick? I waited patiently while she finished her lasagna. “Are you done eating?” I asked, adjusting myself as she put the last bite in her mouth.

Her cheeks blushed a pretty pink. “I am now. Thank you for dinner. It was delicious.”

“My pleasure. Thanks for spending the weekend with me. I like having you here.” I stood and reached a hand out for her. I wanted to haul her over my shoulder and carry her to my bed like a caveman, but this had to be her choice.

Juliette smiled and took my hand shyly. I pulled her against me and gave her a soft kiss on the lips before I shifted back to see her face. “If I remember the plan correctly, it’s time for me to unwrap this gift.” She nodded, and without giving her time to get nervous, I led her towards my bedroom.

I sat at the edge of my bed and pulled Juliette to stand between my legs. “Hi, baby,” I whispered as I cupped her cheek. My fingertips grazed over her jaw and neck while I searched her pretty eyes. “You good with this?”

She nodded.

“You say stop, we stop. Anytime. Okay?”

“Okay,” she whispered back.

I speared my fingers into her hair and pulled her in for a kiss. She opened her mouth for me, as eager as I felt. I angled her head and deepened the kiss. I couldn’t get close enough to her. I needed more. Needed to feel her. My hands slid down her sides to the hem of her t-shirt. I broke our kiss just long enough to pull her shirt off, her bra following. I wanted to devour her, but first I wanted to worship her. To show her how she deserved to be worshiped.

I trailed my lips from hers, down her throat and chest to the swell of her breasts. Juliette moaned, and I rewarded her by sucking her nipple into my mouth, and when she moaned louder, I sucked harder before I soothed her with gentle licks and slow flicks of my tongue. She arched her back and grabbed onto my hair, holding me to her. I treated the other side to the same attention, my fingers playing with the first pink, peaked nipple.

Juliette groaned my name, her voice filled with need. With abandon. I kissed her deeply again, her tongue dueling with mine as my hands slid down her curves to her ass. I squeezed the round cheeks before lifting her up and laying her on my bed.

I hovered over Juliette, searching her gaze again. Hunger and need flared in her pretty eyes. My lips crashed onto hers. I rocked my hips against her, loving the answering roll of her hips. Without breaking our kiss, I twisted to my side, laying on the bed next to her, freeing my hand to explore her body. I ran my hand over her breasts, over the soft skin of her slightly rounded belly, around her hips, dipping my fingers into the waistband of her leggings. I looked at her in question and she nodded. I slid the leggings and her panties off, sliding my hands down her legs as I did, then I slowly slid my hands back up, brushing my fingers over the small triangle of trimmed hair, grazing her clit and teasing her opening. I felt her wetness, smelled her arousal. I couldn’t wait to have more of her.

“Dylan!” Juliette gasped.

My dick pressed painfully against the zipper of my jeans. Settle down, we’re taking our time tonight . I dragged a fingertip in slow circles around her clit. She thrusted her hips, searching for more. I teased her before giving her what she needed, putting pressure right on the bundle of nerves. She cried out. I slid a finger inside her, and then another one. So tight and warm. I couldn’t wait to be inside her. I eased my fingers in and out, gently at first before building speed and pressure. I crooked my fingers and twisted my hand, digging my knuckles into her. Juliette moaned, her hips rocking against my hand. Her inner muscles tightened around my fingers. I fingered her faster, harder, pressing on her clit with my thumb and kissing her. Juliette’s body arched off the bed, every muscle inside and out tensing. I tore my mouth away from hers. I needed to see her lose control even more than I needed to kiss her.

“Dylan!” She screamed with a guttural cry as she clenched around my fingers.

I slowed my movement, softly kissing her lips, cheeks, nose, eyes, smiling as her eyelids fluttered and her body relaxed.

“So good,” Juliette murmured. She gazed at me for a moment with soft, sated eyes before suddenly springing into action, her frenzied hands pulling my shirt off and tossing it to the floor, unbuttoning my pants, trying to touch me everywhere all at once. I took over unzipping and pulling down my jeans. Between her enthusiastic hands and my dick straining to free itself, it was safer that way.

Juliette’s movements slowed to a tantalizing caress once I was naked before her. She ran her fingers up and down the ridges of my abs and pecs and around my nipples.

I’d honed my body to ensure I could keep myself and others safe in life-threatening emergencies, used my strength to carry grown men to safety, but somehow, nothing had ever been more satisfying than the look in Juliette’s eyes as her hands roved over me. I felt cherished by her. I was content just to let her touch me, happy to feel her body against mine, to watch the emotions swirling in her expressive eyes. Until she reached out her tongue and licked my nipple.

Before she could blink, I had Juliette flipped on her back, my dick pressed firmly against her core as my eyes met hers, searching for confirmation.

“Juls, I want to make love to you.” My voice came out low and husky as I caressed her cheek.

“Yes. Please. I need you, Dylan.” Her voice was raspy. Needy. So fucking sexy.

I reached over to the nightstand for a condom and was ready for her in seconds. I lined myself up to her opening and pushed in just a little. My eyes anchored to hers, she begged for more. She gasped as I entered slowly, her nails biting into my shoulders. Inch by inch, I worked my way in as Juliette cried out, moaning sexy little sounds, drawing me in, sucking away my resolve. I pushed in, groaning at the feel of her heat surrounding my dick, my balls cradled against her ass. She cried out an incoherent sound, and I froze. I wanted to stay like that, buried deep inside her, forever. If I moved it would end too soon.

“You good, baby?” I ground out.

“So good. More.”

That’s my girl. I happily gave her what she asked for. I pulled out and rocked into her, slowly at first, steadily picking up speed. I couldn’t hold back, she felt too good. Her hips thrusted eagerly, her hands everywhere, her noises wild. So much passion. Her body tensed under me. Her nails dug into my biceps, her eyes flared wide, and her mouth opened in a silent scream.

So close, but she didn’t let go.

“Juliette, come baby! Come for me!”

That did it. She detonated under me. Her body writhed, her hips thrust, her nails dug into my shoulders hard enough to draw blood, and she cried out.

“Juliette,” I groaned, pumping a few more times, drawing out her pleasure before I planted myself as deep inside her as I could get and let myself go. Oh God, she felt good.

I rolled to the side, pulling her with me, careful to not crush her. We held each other tight, both breathing hard. As we returned to earth, I caressed her face. “So beautiful,” I whispered, running a hand over her hair. I needed to touch her, to show her how precious she was to me.

Eventually, I reluctantly got up to dispose of the condom and clean myself up. When I came out with a washcloth for her in my hand, she was waiting outside the bathroom door.

“I’ll just be a minute,” she said quietly. I gently lifted her chin and kissed her. I didn’t want her shyness after what we just shared.

“I’ll be waiting for you in bed.”

I reached back in to return the washcloth, and Juliette walked around me into the bathroom. When she came back a few minutes later, I lifted the blanket in a silent invitation. She crawled in and curled up against me, her head on my shoulder, arm on my chest, fingers toying with my nipple. I wrapped my arms around her, loving the feel of her warm, soft body snuggled against mine. I wanted to bask in this forever, but Juliette’s breathing evened out almost immediately, and a moment later, I followed her into a contented sleep.

I was smiling before I even opened my eyes. I would be a very happy man if I could wake up every morning to Juliette wiggling in my arms, squeezing my arm against her chest and rubbing her ass against my dick.

No. Fuck. That was not sexy, happy wiggling. That was the feel of her trying to hide that she was crying.

“Juls? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing”

“You’re crying. What is it?” I tried to pull back to see her face, but she tightened her arms around my forearm, holding me in place.

“Don’t let go. Please.”

I tightened my arms, wrapping myself around her. “I’m not going anywhere, baby. But please talk to me. Did I hurt you?”

“No! You were great. This is great. I’m crying because I’m happy.”

“What are you thinking? Please tell me.”

I felt her take a breath and slowly let it out in an effort to relax, but her body still felt taut. I tried to keep mine relaxed, hoping my calmness, my love could seep into her. Yes, love. I wasn’t ready to say it to her yet, but I could admit it to myself. Which made her tears terrifying. Did she regret what we did?

“Everything we did last night was so good. Better than good. And I woke up thinking about how amazing it was and about how wonderful it felt to sleep in your arms.” She paused, then continued at a whisper. “You make my body feel so good. My body never feels good.”

“Juls, baby, your body is amazing.”

“No, you don’t get it. My body never feels right. It’s like they put my brain in the wrong body. I’m always tripping over my feet like they don’t belong to me. My brain tells my body what to do, and it may or may not really listen. But last night I felt so good. And it seemed like it was good for you too, I think. And I woke up and felt you surrounding me and that felt so good too.”

“Baby, everything about last night was incredible. The sex was mind-blowing. Snuggling with you all night was a close second. I woke up thinking that I’d love to wake up like this every day. I’m glad I made you feel so good, and I swear, the feeling is mutual.”

Juls tightened her hold on my arm and wiggled in closer, not that there was any space there to begin with. I tightened my arms around her, sensing she needed them to hold herself together.

I carefully debated my next words. “Is there more? You said these were happy tears, but I get the feeling that there’s more to it. You are happy, but…” I trailed off, hoping she’d finish the thought.

Juliette’s breath quickened. “I…you…it’s nothing.” She blew out a frustrated breath.

I kissed her neck softly and gently glided my fingertips over her hip, touching her everywhere I could reach without releasing my hold on her. “I want to hear what you’re thinking, baby. It’s okay. Take your time.”

Her heart was pounding so hard, I could feel it like a drum beat against my chest, but brave as always, she pulled in a deep breath and opened her mouth to speak. When just a little stutter came out, she tried again. “I’m scared of how much I like you. I’m scared you’re going to get frustrated or bored with me. You can have anyone you want.”

“I don’t care about your speech or how coordinated you are or aren’t. I care about how you make me feel. I see horrible shit almost every day, and at the end of a long shift, coming home to see you makes me happy. I like that you want us to just cocoon ourselves up in a little bubble. It’s only about you and me, baby. You don’t care about putting on a show for others like so many people do, like Kayla did. I feel bad that you’re uncomfortable sometimes, but that doesn’t turn me off. It just makes me want to be there to make you feel better.”

I felt Juliette start to relax as I continued. “When I’m in a fire, my team and my gear protect me, even when we’re surrounded by danger. When I put on that gear and feel its weight on my back and see my brothers by my side, I know I’m safe to take risks that I couldn’t without them. I want to be that for you. I want you to know I’ll always have your back, that I’ll always protect you. I want to make you feel safe to take risks in life. I want to be your safe place.”

“You are. It scares me how much you already are,” Juliette whispered.

“I’m scared, too, Juls. I’ve never felt anything like this before. It feels so right when we’re together, and when we’re apart, I crave the next time that I’ll get to talk to you, to see you, to touch you. I can’t ever get enough of you.”

Juliette turned in my arms to face me. Her eyes were rimmed in red, but the gold sunbursts shimmering in the morning light told me everything I needed to know.

I wiped the wetness off her cheeks and traced over her delicate eyebrows. “That scared feeling…it’s like the fear that you feel climbing to the top of a roller coaster. You’re afraid of the possibility, however small, that the ride could derail and annihilate you. But if we embrace that fear as part of the exhilaration of the ride and have faith that it’s all going to work out, it’ll be the best fucking ride of our lives.”

Juliette gazed at me with huge eyes, before she started to laugh. “Look at you, so deep this morning.”

“Trust me, baby. Hold my hand and enjoy this ride with me.” I released my arm from around her just enough to extend my hand out, waiting for her to take that symbolic leap with me.

Juliette didn’t keep me waiting. With a certainty that soothed the worry I’d felt since waking up to her crying in my arms, Juliette grabbed my hand and held it tight.

I used that hand to flip her to her back before I followed on top of her. I pressed my body against hers, chest to toes touching, leaning on my forearms just enough to avoid crushing her. I lowered my face to hers until our lips were a breath apart. I bit back the words that were fighting to come out: I love you. Instead I made slow, sweet love to her, hoping she could feel the love in every caress and kiss, every thrust and touch.