Chapter One
Chapter One
T he carnival is in town for four days out of the year and it’s the most exciting thing that happens around here. That’s the problem when you live in a small town that has more cows than people. The one good thing about this place is the people aren’t complete assholes, like most small towns. Usually that goes hand-in-hand, and as a gay man, it isn’t what I want to deal with. Not that there’s any benefit of being here to my sexuality, because I’m not into cows. The options for men who play for the same team as me are slim to none, not that I’m actively trying to find a man or anything. I’ve had enough bad luck in that department that I think I’m eternally turned off by the thought of another person sharing a bed with me.
“Are we going in or what?” Brian asks with a huff.
“Yeah, I guess.”
“Well, everyone else is already in there.”
“And I told you if you wanted to go, you could go.”
Brian rolls his eyes and gets out of my truck. It’s not that I don’t want to hang out with my friends, I’ve just had a long day, and I wanted to unwind a little before heading into a carnival that the entire town will be at. It’s loud, chaotic, and fuck clowns. Not literally, because they scare the living shit out of me. I could get down with a man in a mask, just not a clown mask.
After sitting alone for a few minutes, I turn off the truck and get out. Pulling my jacket a little tighter, because fall is setting in, I slam my door and get in line with the few people walking toward the entrance with is a path through a line of trees.
There is no fee to get in, only to ride the rides and play the games. I won’t do either. Honestly, I don’t know why I’m here at all, other than wanting some fried dough, because they make it the best. And yeah, I guess hanging out with my friends isn’t so bad. I’ve blown them off enough over the last few weeks.
“Ethan!” Miranda shouts, running toward me with her hands in the air. She jumps into my arms and I hug her, then put her on her feet. “I’m so glad you made it.”
“Nothing else to do in this shithole.”
“Fine, don’t admit you missed me.” She smiles up at me, her blond hair blowing across her face. She tucks it behind her ear.
“Okay, I guess I missed you a little.”
She hooks her arm in mine and leads me to the rest of the group. Everyone I consider a friend is here tonight—four people. I’m the fifth wheel, have been since elementary school. Some things don’t change.
We share hugs and hellos, and then Hailey, Brian’s girlfriend, says she wants popcorn, so we head to the food trucks. Everyone gets a snack, and we find an empty picnic table to sit. There’s sticky stuff all over it and trash beneath it, but it’s already day two of the carnival, so I guess it could be worse. People in this town are pigs.
“So, how did that date go?” Miranda asks, waggling her brows at me.
“What date?” I ask, pulling off a piece of my fried dough and shoving it into my mouth. Fuck, this is so good.
“The last one you went on. With Keith?”
“Kevin,” I correct. “And it was shit, like all the other ones.”
“I keep telling you to get out of this town,” Scott says, earning him a slap from Miranda.
Miranda and Scott have been dating since high school, same as Hailey and Brian. So cliche, honestly. I’ll admit they’re cute together, though. They’ll get married soon and start having babies. Their kids will go to the same schools we did, do the same stupid shit on the weekends we did. Meet other people in their class of a hundred and get married to them. The cycle is never-ending.
Unless you’re me.
“I would if I could,” I say. “It ain’t easy to afford city-living. Besides, city is loud as hell.”
“And they don’t have any cows. What ever will you do?” Brian says.
“Thank god, that’s what,” I say, causing everyone to laugh.
“Are you still on those apps?” Hailey asks, picking up some popcorn to put in her mouth.
“I haven’t deleted my profiles, but I hardly check them. All the guys on there want the same thing. For me to be their dirty little secret while they go home to their wives and kids. Not my thing. I’m giving up.”
“You can’t give up on love,” Miranda says with a pout.
“I’m convinced there is no one out there for me, and that’s totally fine. I’m happy.”
“Liar,” Scott says, and I kick him under the table. He hisses.
“I’m not lying.”
“Whatever,” he grumbles, reaching down to rub his leg.
I take the last bite of my treat, get to my feet, and say, “I’m going to get a beer.”
“We’ll be at the Ferris wheel,” Miranda calls out. I hold a hand up, letting her know I heard her as I walk away. I order two beers, guzzling the first one before working on the second. Then I go off to find my friends.
They’re toward the front of the line for the Ferris wheel, but will have to wait another go-round before they get on. I lean against the railing and people-watch. I hate these rides. You wouldn’t catch me dead on one of them. Not even if you paid me, and money is something I could desperately use right about now to get the hell out of this town. I finish my second beer and head over to get another. When I return, my friends are first in line for the ride.
I let out a huff and look around, trying to figure out what to do to pass the time. This always happens when I hang out with them, and it isn’t even their fault. It’s me. I distance myself because even though I love them, I feel like I don’t fit in. I’m the only single person in the group, and it just feels weird. I don’t have my person, my partner, while they all have theirs.
I’m halfway through my third beer when my gaze catches on a blinking sign in the back corner. It’s almost hidden away. The carnival is set up in a giant rectangle, with the games lined up, back-to-back, in the middle. The rides and food trucks are around the outside, making the perimeter. Curiosity gets me, and I push off the railing to head that way. I finish the beer on the way, and as I walk, I realize the alcohol is starting to hit me. Three beers in about twenty minutes will do that to you, even if it won’t last for long.
As I get closer to the flashing sign, I finally make out what it says.
PSYCHIC.
Yeah, ‘cause that’s what I need.
Someone who can chat with otherworldly beings to tell me I’ll be alone for the rest of my life.
Fuck it.
I’m not doing anything else. I did all I wanted to do here; I had the fried dough. There isn’t a ride or a game that I’m interested in, so I may as well get some humor out of the quack on the other side of the purple curtain.
Pulling the thick velvet curtain to the side, I step into the tent and find a woman sitting at a round table in the center. You could fit a handful of people in here comfortably, standing around the table, but there is only enough room for one other person to sit.
“Good evening, young man,” the woman says.
She’s younger than I thought she’d be, with blond hair and dark eye makeup. Her lips are bright red and her skin is pale. She’s wearing a loose purple robe and a ton of sparkling jewelry. Quack, indeed.
“Hello,” I say, dropping into the chair across from her.
She smiles at me, leaning forward and searching my face.
“What can I do for you?” she asks.
“Uh, tell my fortune? Isn’t that what you do?”
She shrugs a shoulder. “Yes and no.”
My eyebrows raise, and I get an itchy feeling along my skin. Maybe this was a bad idea.
“What does that mean?”
“It means I can do many things. One of which is help you with your future.”
“Help with it? I thought you’d just tell it to me.”
“If that’s all you want, then that is what I’ll do.” She leans back in her chair, tapping a long, pointy fingernail on the table. “But I have a feeling you’d like some special help.”
“Special help? You’re barking up the wrong tree,” I huff out a laugh and get to my feet. Does this woman think that works? Actually, knowing the men around here, it probably does.
“Not like that, silly boy. Sit back down.”
She gestures to the chair, and I do. For some reason, I stay, even though this all feels kind of weird.
“Okay, so what is this, then?” I ask.
“You want something, but you don’t want to admit that you want it. I can see it from here.”
“There are a lot of things I want,” I say with a smirk. “Like a million dollars. Can you help with that?”
She smiles at me. “You hide your pain behind your humor. That’s okay, a lot of people do. But you won’t have to for long. Not if you get my help.”
“And how much does your help cost?” I say.
“Free,” she says simply.
“Free?” I ask, and she nods.
“The biggest scams are either too expensive or free. What do you want?”
“Truly, I want nothing. Let me explain. My name is Madame Zella, and I have many deals going with many people. Ongoing contracts and such. I know what you seek, and I can ensure that you get it.”
“And what is it I seek?” I ask, my heart pounding a little harder.
“True love.”
I hold her gaze, feeling almost trapped by it. Like I can’t move. Finally, I pull my gaze away and get up again.
“This is nuts.”
“Humor me,” she says quickly.
Again, I turn to look at her, but I don’t know why I’m staying. I should just leave.
But what if…
Gesturing to the chair again, she says, “If you think this is all a scam, and I want nothing from you, then humor me.”
“By doing what?”
“There is a list of things I will give you. Collect the items and follow the instructions during the next full moon and you will have all you desire.”
“That’s it?” I ask. “How?”
She gestures around us with a slow wave. “The powers that be.”
“That sounds like a crock of shit.”
Her smile grows, her gaze still on me as she walks toward the small shelf beside me, near the entrance. She pulls open the drawer, digs around, and pulls out a small sheet of paper. Handing it to me, she says, “Humor me. Wait until the full moon and do all the things listed. I promise you will not be disappointed.”
And because I’m either drunker than I thought or really dumb, I take the paper from her fingers and go find my friends.
“Where have you been?” Miranda asks as I shove the paper into my back pocket, hiding it from them. The last thing I need to give the guys is fuel to make fun of me some more.
“Just wandering around.”
I don’t breathe a word to them about Madame Zella, but once I get home and I’m safe in my bed, the first thing I do is find when the next full moon is.