Chapter 13
13
L ucas waited for Joan so they could walk out of the bowling alley together.
“You feel better about life now?” His smile warmed her profile.
“You were right. Bowling did help.”
“See? Who needs dramatic changes when you can have five dollar onion rings and the thrill of competition on a Thursday night?
Joan laughed. After her recent funk, it warmed him to hear her laugh.
“There were some tense moments there,” he said, angling his head toward the door to indicate the others. “What’s going on with everyone, you think?”
“Well.” Joan stopped next to her car and leaned against it. “As far as Jackie goes, I think she’s controlling, and she doesn’t like for Gwen to hang out with her friends or have her own interests, which are huge red flags to me. Gwen’s been more anxious lately, and she seems miserable with Jackie when they’re together. I don’t get it.”
“I mean, unless she’s in danger, I guess you gotta let people make their mistakes, right?”
Joan’s shoulders dropped. “I know. I think I’ll keep my mouth shut from now on.” She pursed her lips. “I’m unsure what to think about Maria and Jay. That was weird. We’ve all been waiting for him to propose, so maybe they just had an argument about something? Who knows?”
Lucas shrugged. He watched as Joan crossed one legging-clad ankle over the other. He found himself giving her legs a brief scan of appreciation before he looked away. What was with him? Maybe the recent threat to their friendship had him clinging to her in unusual ways.
“And Martin?” Lucas kicked a loose piece of gravel with his toe. “How did that go?”
She shook her head. The relief he felt confused him.
“It’s not going to work, but that’s okay.” She paused, seeming to deliberate over her next sentence. “Besides that, anytime I flirt or a guy asks me out, I get this horrible fear about how things are going to progress. It just takes some of the fun out of dating to have all this shame.” She brushed her hair out of her face. “This is weird, right?”
“Truthfully?” He scrubbed a hand over his chin. “Not at all. It’s just a medical problem. And, uh, sorry things aren’t going to go anywhere with Martin.”
She wrinkled her nose instead of answering him. The lights in the parking lot came on as the sky dimmed.
“How’s your brother?” she asked. “I haven’t seen him since your birthday dinner in January.”
He stiffened. He thought of Jacob’s recent assertion that something was going on with their father. The notion had burrowed into his brain and made a home there.
“Jacob’s an asshole.” Lucas smiled, allowing himself to relax again. “But I love him.”
“You two have a lot in common, actually.”
“See? My point still stands. Also, some people would say that about us.”
“That we’re assholes?”
“That we’re a lot alike,” he said.
“Oh, boy.” She ticked several items off on her fingers. “Competitive. Talks too much. Excellent ball-throwing skills.” Lucas laughed at that. “Shared trauma in the form of accidentally seeing my dad in his underwear. Maybe these people have a point.”
“I’m glad ball throwing made it onto your short list of talents.”
“Ball handling has always been a talent of mine.”
He put his head in his hands and groaned. “I knew I was setting myself up for that.”
She kicked her foot out and nudged his own with it. “I didn’t mean to cross a line.”
“I think that ship sailed a long time ago. I know things about your vagina now.”
She pulled her mouth down. “It sounds so gross when you say it that way. But sure, you know more about me than almost anyone else.”
That warmed Lucas again. He honestly didn’t know how he could live without Joan. The thought of leaving town pricked at him, reminding him of his need to decide what he wanted to do about that.
They said their goodbyes, and he wondered what he could do for her. She was clearly hurting, on more than just a physical level, and he had a feeling bowling wouldn’t be enough to make her feel better. He would think of something.