Chapter 22
“What doyou want to say to me?” I ask as I turn to confront my mother in the empty dining room that she’s taken me to.
I hate the thought of looking at her, but there’s no hiding from this. I finally lift my gaze, and staring directly at her, I take my mother in properly for the first time since she died.
In front of me stands the woman who allowed me to believe an unforgivable lie.
“I didn’t do right by you,” she begins, “When I returned, I wanted to push you away, so I tried to act as if you didn’t mean anything to me. It was a lie, Tarian,” she says as she moves into the room and makes her way to the window. “I should have been a mother to you before anything else, but I’d read your father’s will and knew what was in it. I knew every line of that document off by heart. It was your father’s dying wish that you remained in Tynewood and took your place as a Crown, so what your father wanted, I granted. Instead of fighting his will and staying with you, I left with Thane.”
“No,” I tell her. “You didn’t grant his dying wish. My father wanted me and you to live in Tynewood together. Yes, he wanted me to be a Crown, but he also wanted you to guide me and raise me. But you killed him. Thane showed me everything, including your letters that were nothing more than bullshit.”
She is silent for a moment, and then she nods.
“You’re right. Your father wanted you to become a Crown, but I hated the Sovereign and the town. I saw what the society did to him.” My mother takes a deep breath before she continues. “I stayed in a loveless marriage to protect you, Tarian, but there came a point I couldn’t live that life anymore. I asked your father for a divorce, but he refused, so one night, I took the gun he hid in his desk and I shot him. Having killed him, I panicked and called Thane who came and helped me stage the car accident and my own death. I will never regret killing your father, Tarian, but I do regret what happened after that.”
“You didn’t have to fake your own death. You could’ve stayed, and I could have grown up with a mother.” All I dreamed of for years was having you still with me.
“I couldn’t face you, knowing I’d murdered your father, and I had my own emotional scars that needed to heal, so I chose to go with Thane and leave you behind. Your father was a strong man, but he was also strong-willed and violent. There are things about him?—”
“I know he was abusive,” I interrupt her. “I’ve read your letters, so I know your version of what happened between the two of you. If it’s true, then I can understand why you wanted to leave him, but you didn’t have to leave me, and you certainly didn’t have to kill him.”
“There were moments I second guessed my decision,” she agrees with a nod. “But it was too late by then.”
“What happened to the baby?”
Shock paints her features, but it slowly disappears. She knows I’ve read all the letters, so she can’t hide from the truth any longer.
“It was my second heartbreak,” she says as she shakes her head. “My first was losing you. Losing another child confirmed what I’d always known— I should never have become a mother.”
I finally allow myself to meet her eyes. I can see her pain reflected in them, and I wonder if I’ll ever be able to forgive her. I know I can’t right now.
“I didn’t think I had any other choice. Now we’ve spoken, I will leave Tynewood for good. I want you to live a happy life, Tarian. I can see you’ve already found someone to love.” There is a gentleness to her words when she says this, and I can’t help furrowing my brow in confusion.
“What do you mean?”
“I’m talking about that girl in the living room. She only agreed to come here today because she wanted to persuade me to talk to you. She asked me to give you the closure you need, so you can move on from the past.”
“She did that for me?”
My mother nods, a smile playing on her lips.
“She loves you, Tarian. You may not see it yet, but you will. Trust me, it will all become clear in time. And when it does, I suggest you don’t walk away from her. In this life, we’re lucky if we’re given even one chance at finding happiness. You can’t afford to let your chance pass you by.”
I find my chest tightening as I look at my mother. I can’t forgive her for what she’s done, but I am grateful she has spoken to me in person, rather than in a letter. The realization that she’s willing to walk away to ensure my future happiness has hit me harder than I care to admit. I thought I was done with feeling pain when it comes to her.
“Look after Grecia, and look after yourself,” my mother says as she steps toward me and cups my face in her hands. “You’re a good boy. I hope you always remember that your father was kind to you. And he loved you dearly. I’m sorry I did what I did after his death. I’ll live with the regret for the rest of my life.”
Then she turns on her heel, and without a backward look, she leaves.
“Are you okay?”
Grecia’s voice comes from the doorway, and I look up to see her standing there, her arms folded across her chest. I can’t deny I was shocked when my mother assured me that Grecia loves me.
“I think so.”
The air crackles with tension as I face Grecia. Her eyes hold mine hostage as she stares right into my soul. She’s always been able to see through the shadows clouding my mind.
Even though I’ve caused her heartache, her presence is confirmation that she’s still fighting for me.
I brace myself for the onslaught of emotions threatening to engulf me. My heart pounds in my chest with a mixture of fear and longing. She’s the one woman I never thought I’d get the chance to be with, but even though I haven’t wanted to admit it because I was too scared, she’s also the one woman I know I can’t be without.
As Grecia stands in front of me, her eyes filled with a mixture of affection and hurt, I find myself unable to tear my gaze away from her. Beneath the layers of pain and anger that have crafted the armor of indifference I wear, I know there’s a vulnerability that calls to the depths of her soul.
“Tarian,” she whispers, her voice barely above a breath when she nears me. The rose and coconut scent of her perfume is intoxicating as she steps closer. “Tell me you’ll be okay. Even if you don’t want me around, I need to know you’ll be able to move on from the past.”
My jaw clenches as I struggle to find the words to convey what she means to me. I’ve never been able to express my emotions. Not even to my best friends. They’re used to me being cold and closed off, but I know I can’t be like that with Grecia.
“I came here to rescue you from Thane,” I finally reply. “And to explain… to make things right between us because I know I fucked up.”
She takes a step back, taking in my features as her eyes dance over my face.
“You had your chance in that kitchen to listen to me, to believe I would never hurt or betray you,” she says, her voice tinged with bitterness. “But you chose to believe lies over truth. You chose to believe Thane over me.”
“I know, Grecia. And I can’t begin to express how sorry I am for the pain I’ve caused you. I’m not great at dealing with my emotions, and when I saw you with him, I lost my mind.”
I can’t imagine how she felt when I told her to get the fuck out of Thane’s house. In my defense, I didn’t pull a gun on her, but as much as I want to joke about her reaction to me in her bedroom, I don’t. I just want her to forgive me and see her smile again.
“You told me to leave, and I did. I’ve no intention of begging for a second chance, Tarian. I’m not that kind of girl.” Her words hit me right in the gut. “It’s too late for a do-over.”
Taking a step toward her, my hand reaches out to brush against hers in a silent plea for understanding.
“It’s not too late, and you don’t have to beg, because I’m the one who’s going to do that. Please give me another chance, Grecia.”
Her mouth opens, then closes. I expect her to tell me to go to hell, and I wouldn’t blame her if she did. If I were Grecia, I would tell me to go there. But then her expression softens. Her eyes are filled with a vulnerability that mirrors my own.
“I wasn’t ready to admit this before, but I love you, Tarian,” she confesses, her voice a soft murmur as she speaks. “I’ve always known there’d be no one else for me. My greatest fear has been that one day you’d hurt me, and you’ve proved I was right to be wary. I want to be with you, but I can’t live my life in constant fear that you’ll break my heart.”
I steal her lips with mine and kiss her deeply. Our tongues dance together. I know this woman was made for me because her body molds perfectly to mine.
I feel the walls around my heart crumble as her fingertips run up my neck and she grips my hair in a harsh hold, causing me to hiss.
“Don’t you dare hurt me again, Tarian Calvert. Ever.”
Grecia’s gaze never wavers from mine. With our eyes locked, she offers me redemption, and I silently vow never to cause her any more pain.
“I never will, Grecia. You’re my goddess. The moment you walked out of that kitchen, I realized what I’d lost. And when Thane told me it was all a joke and he knew I’d lose my shit, I realized he’d manipulated you and fucked with my emotions. No other woman compares to you.”
I stare at her, knowing I want nothing more than for her to be mine until I take my final breath. No matter when that will be.
“I’ll be forever grateful that you sought me out in Capri and stood by me,” I tell her. “Your presence helped me heal, but it also made me realize how much you mean to me. I need you, Grecia. You aren’t just a friend. You’re my lifeline. You’ve taken my heart and are keeping it safe, but I’ve been too blind to see it.”
“So, is this it?” Grecia looks up at me with a small smile on her lips.
I reach out, and my fingers gently cup her chin as I tilt her head up to meet my gaze.
“This is it, goddess. I want to make things right, Grecia. I want to make it up to you for the hurt I’ve caused, for not believing you. Please give me a second chance.”
She trembles at the vulnerable honesty of my words. There’s hope shining in her eyes like a beacon in the darkness.
“And what if I don’t want to give you a second chance, Tarian? What if I’m not ready to forgive you?” There’s a slight hitch in her voice as she speaks.
My determination is unwavering when I think about losing her. “Then I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to earn your forgiveness, Grecia. Because you’re worth it… you’re worth everything to me.”
And as we stand, face-to-face, the past seems to melt away. I know now Grecia’s love is the only thing that can heal the deep wounds inside me.
I reach out to take her hand. She doesn’t fight me or tell me to leave. Instead, her fingers tangle with mine.
“This is it, goddess. Are you ready?” I ask as we make our way toward the living room and back to reality.
“I’ve never been more ready for anything in my life.” Her voice is filled with confidence now, and I smile at my strong, independent woman.
I silently vow to give her the happiness she deserves. And I promise myself to open my heart to the possibility of love and a happily ever after with her.