6. Ciara
“What’s wrong with Ciara?” Aislinn’s voice drifted to me as though I was under water, garbled, muted, and distorted.
I squeezed my eyes shut, so I didn’t have to see the worry on her face as Malachi carried me from the library. If I had full function right now, I’d be embarrassed, but the panic swirling inside me made nothing else matter.
My body jolted as Malachi marched up the stairs. His chest was firm against me. Warm. His heart beat steadily. The sound comforted me. I snuggled closer to him, letting his mere presence soothe me. Ground me. The unusual tingle in my skin started again taking me further away from the panic attack and into the desire building for my best friend.
Cool air whipped my hair around my face. I risked opening my eyes and found Malachi’s jaw clenched into a hard line. He had the most perfect jaw. Solid with angles I longed to kiss, but we were best friends, and kissing was a no-no.
The soothing cadence of running water penetrated the last of my panic attack. Letting it free from its hold, I clung tighter to him and pretended for a moment I could kiss him. Then Malachi set my legs on the ground, but he kept a steady hand on my lower back to keep me from falling over. The tingles vibrated across my lower back and made me desire him even more.
“How are you doing there?”
“Better,” I said, drawing in a lungful of the fresh night air. “Where are we?”
“The fountain would be my guess.”
“Yes, it is,” Aislinn said joining us. “Care to tell me what happened?”
I brushed strands of hair away from my face needing a moment to squash the lust building in me for my best friend. Was I the only one feeling this way? I’d felt moments like this occasionally over the years, but here on Earth, they were frequent. Was it this realm or the disruption in the spring making me feel this way? I let out a sigh since my sister was waiting for an explanation.
“I had a panic attack.”
“Since when do you have panic attacks?” She folded her arms over her chest.
“For as long as I can remember. I don’t like caves. They make my skin crawl and then I can’t breathe. It all builds up. I feel the sense the walls are closing in on me. That the darkness of my power will consume me.” I shuddered.
“Dia, Ciara, why didn’t you say anything all these years?”
“It wasn’t an issue back home. I made sure I wasn’t anywhere that would set me off… well most of the time I suppose.” The wind whipped my hair again making me wonder if it was Aislinn’s power over wind causing the disturbance. Was she acting differently like me?
Aislinn brushed my hair back from my face. “How are you going to study the books in the underground library?”
“I’ll be fine in a minute to go back down.”
“But what if you have another attack?”
“Malachi will carry me out. He knows what to do.”
Aislinn’s sharp gaze landed on Malachi.
“Why didn’t you tell me about Ciara’s panic attacks?”
“It’s her place to tell you.”
Aislinn scowled harder.
“He’s my best friend, Aislinn. Don’t take it out on him.”
I’d defend him no matter what. I’d defend him in the middle of a panic attack if he needed me to. There wasn’t anything I wouldn’t do for him.
“What other secrets are you two keeping?”
We exchanged glances and laughed.
“You’re as bad as Saoirse and Lorcan.” Aislinn huffed. “Those two were terrible for keeping their secrets.”
Saoirse and Lorcan were the closest of all of us siblings. We all loved each other, but sometimes family weren’t the ones you confided in. I’d always been closest to Malachi. He was more than family to me. These strange sensations I was having around him now made it hard to talk to him about them. Anything else and I would have asked him, but this… what if I ruined our friendship because the declining spring was affecting us and that was all?
“Remember when Father caught them eavesdropping…” Aislinn paused and pursed her lips. “You were maybe too young.”
I recalled the moment she was talking about, but remembering Father this way made me remember he was dying, and it made me sadder than I’d ever been in my life. Aislinn’s sullen expression appeared she was recalling the way Father was lying unconscious too.
I twirled the long length of my hair around my hand keeping it in place against the blowing wind and wishing I’d braided my hair the way Aislinn always did.
“I remember the time the cooks chased them from the kitchen when they stole freshly baked cakes before they had a chance to even decorate them.”
“Oh yes.” Aislinn attempted to smile, but it fell short. She squinted back at the way we’d come. “I should head back to the books.”
“We’ll be there soon. I need another minute out here.”
Aislinn nodded and made her way through the thick plant life and into the shadows of the night.
I turned my attention to the fountain before us. Water cascaded from the structure and tumbled down to the cobblestones underneath, soaking into the thick moss and disappearing. Powerful magic hummed from the water. I was even calmer here and all lingering traces of the panic attack vanished. My power felt calmer too so why did the tingling sensation in my skin still run over me?
“This place is almost the same as the atrium back home.”
“If the plants had overgrown the atrium.” Malachi smiled.
“Did you ever imagine there was a place on Earth like ours and we’d find it?”
“Yes. We’ll find everything we need,” Malachi said. “I believe in us.”
“I do too.”
“Are you ready to head back to the library?”
“I think so. Thank you for carrying me out of there.”
“Any time.” He smiled. “Have you gazed up?”
“What?” I lifted my chin.
The night glittered with thousands of starlit jewels in the ebony sky. Twinkling and sparkling as though powered by magic themselves. The moon was a tiny sliver of light curved into a crescent. I imagined curling into the arc and snuggling the moonbeams to survey the beauty of the stars from amongst them.
“It’s breathtaking,” I said on a breathy exhale for the beauty of the Earth’s sky took my breath away.
“Aye,” Malachi agreed. “It would be a shame to lose it.”
I lowered my gaze to his handsome face. Even with the limited light from the night sky, he took my breath away too. He tilted his head to the side and my heart leaped as anticipation built between us. Was he thinking about kissing me? Or was it the strange feelings I was experiencing being on Earth? Was he having them too? His head inched closer.
My breath caught in my lungs. Every inch of my body vibrated in anticipation of his kiss.
And then a scream rang through the air shattering the moment of attraction.