Chapter 21
SIRONA
Grant fills me in one smooth thrust and we both gasp as he reaches the hilt.
He”s motionless above me for a moment, letting us both simply experience the feeling of my pussy wrapped around his cock. I turn my head, my mouth seeking his. I need to connect with him in every possible way.
His beard is coated in my musk as we devour each other”s mouths, and it simply adds to my arousal. I don”t know how he consistently turns me on enough to come two or three times, but he does and it”s amazing. There”s so much more to us than sex, but the sex is really damn good.
I need him to move; I need that sweet friction. I rock my hips, forcing his cock to slide out, then back into me. He groans into my mouth as he responds with a long, slow, solid thrust. At the end, he rolls his hips in a small circle, pressing down on my clit.
Fire rages through me. I”m not going to last long, despite two massive orgasms. He turns me on too much for me to wait.
”More of that,” I beg. Why is it so hot that he inspires me to beg?
”Gladly.” He buries his face in my neck again and fucks me in earnest. Fast and hard and always with that hip-roll at the end.
I thrust up at him, taking everything he can give me. We”re both making incoherent sounds, sometimes interspersed with each other”s names.
”You feel so fucking good,” he growls in my ear, and that”s all it takes for me to come apart.
I arch into him, my body frozen in pure bliss. My fingernails dig into his ass, holding him to me as I squirm against him to get maximum pleasure.
”Yes. Come for me.”
His directive sends another wave of ecstasy over me. I shudder around him as he continues to thrust, drawing it out.
When it finally recedes and I come back to myself, I clench my pussy around him, tighten my arms and legs, hold him to me in every way I can. ”Now come for me,” I whisper in his ear.
He thrusts again, and one final time, then holds deep and shatters in my arms.
”Fuck, Sirona.”
He shakes and I hold on, never wanting this to end.
When his body relaxes, his mouth seeks mine out. His kiss is urgent, like everything we”ve done isn”t enough. I return the kiss, matching his passion, stroke for stroke, nibble by nibble.
Time ebbs and flows, bending around us. It feels almost like we”re encased in magical energy, but I know I haven”t cast any spells. This connection between us is all mundane. But mundane is a horrible word for something so powerful.
With a groan, he eventually ends the kiss. He reaches between us and eases his softened cock out of me. Just the brush of his fingers over my still-swollen skin sends arousal skittering up my spine.
I”ll never get enough of this amazing person.
And now I have to shatter his hope.
The thought cracks through the happy bubble around us. But I know I have to do it. I”ve already waited too long. I was going to tell him earlier tonight, before we had sex. That was my plan. But clearly that went awry.
He shoves the used condom in a baggie he brought for that purpose, then rolls back toward me. Gathering me against him, he kisses my hair, then my temple.
”How is every time better than the last?”
I hum my agreement, too worn out to speak yet.
”At some point, we have to hit the top, right? I mean, there”s a limit. You”d think.”
Except we”ll never find out, because he”s leaving so soon. Too soon. My chest squeezes. Again, I can”t speak, so I simply press a soft kiss to his shoulder.
Now is the time. He”s drowsy with pleasure, so he”ll be more receptive to what I have to say. I hope. I just have to open my mouth and tell him.
If Koko were here, she”d call me a coward. She has, in fact, called me one for not telling him yet.
Just fucking do it, Sirona.
That one is my own inner voice.
”So, um... there”s something I need to tell you.” Dammit, my tone is more foreboding that I want.
He stiffens, just a little. I wouldn”t notice if we weren”t touching. But I do. I soothe my palm over his chest. He”s so warm, even in the cool evening air. I”m starting to get goosebumps and would be perfectly happy getting in the sleeping bag.
”I told you I received some knowledge about a patient when we were camping last time. And that”s why I cut things off.”
”Yes.” His tone is curt. Guarded.
”That was true. I just didn”t tell you everything. And, well, the patient was you. I got knowledge about you.”
The words hang in the silence, a heavy presence in the tent with us.
He doesn”t say anything, just lies there, perfectly still.
”Grant?”
”What about me?” he bites out.
He”s mad. And rightfully so.
”I should have told you sooner. I know that. I just didn”t know how. I couldn”t?—”
”What. About. Me.”
I suck in a deep, fortifying breath. ”The surgery isn”t going to work. No amount of surgery will. Modern medicine can”t fix your hand.”
He pulls away from me and sits up, staring at the zipper of the tent door. I reach and put my hand on his arm, but he shrugs it off.
Tears well up in my throat. Have I just destroyed this? Maybe I should have kept it to myself, let him keep his hope. Let him...
No, it was unfair to keep it secret this long. ”I should have told you sooner,” I repeat. ”I just didn”t know how to... to take away your hope.”
He grabs his boxer briefs and struggles to pull them on. Not saying anything, he yanks on his shoes and unzips the tent.
”Grant?”
”I just need... I need space.”
With that, he crawls out of the tent and zips me back in.
Everything in me screams to follow him. To go comfort him. But that”s clearly not what he wants and I”m not going to go against his wishes. I”ve already hurt him enough tonight.
Now overly chilled, I crawl into the sleeping bag with nothing but my thoughts. I have my phone, and I have a book with me. But I don”t want to check social media or text someone. I wouldn”t be able to focus on my book.
I just want Grant. I want to hold him and soothe him and make him feel better. Tell him that Nana has been looking for a spell.
As if she knows I”m thinking about her, which she might, my phone chimes with the specific tone I”ve assigned her text messages. I”ve got nothing else to do, so I reach for it.
Nana: I think I”ve found something. The three of us will talk after dinner tomorrow.
Hope blooms in my chest. As soon as he gets back in the tent, I”ll tell him. Wearing nothing but underwear and tennis shoes, he can”t be going far. He”s probably just sitting by the fire. We were in such a rush to get in the tent and get naked, we didn”t bank it. One of us needs to do that too.
I send Nana a quick text to thank her, then set my phone down on top of my backpack. I gather my strewn clothes and fold them, putting them on the ground next to my pack.
Should I put on a t-shirt? Is it weird to wait naked for him when he”s clearly upset with me? I have no idea what the protocol is here. I didn”t bring pajamas, assuming we”d sleep naked together like we have every night since our first night together.
Will he think it through, see my side without me there to advocate for myself, and come back and want to snuggle with me?
Seems unlikely.
But somehow it also feels like a slight to put on my shirt. So I remain naked. And I wait.
And wait.
And wait.
I have no idea how much time passes, and I don”t bother checking my phone to find out. He”ll take however long he needs.
I”ve dozed off when the sound of the zipper wakes me with a start. Grant”s grim face appears through the opening, then the rest of him. He glances in my direction but doesn”t meet my eyes.
”Sorry to wake you,” he says as he sits, zips up, and pulls off his shoes.
”It”s fine.”
Do I tell him about Nana and the possible spell? Or do I wait for him to talk first?
”It hurts, Sirona. It hurts that you didn”t tell me right away.” He”s sitting on top of the sleeping bag. Close enough that I could touch him, but he”s giving off an energy that clearly says not to.
”I know. And I”m so sorry. I should have told you as soon as I figured it all out, what the message from the deities was.”
”I guess I can understand why you didn”t.” His voice is heavy with sadness. ”Doesn”t mean I accept it, but I can understand.”
I want to touch him. I want to reach out and comfort him. My chest aches and my fingers itch with the need. I”m hurting too. And it”s my own fault.
”I wish I could say something more than ”I”m sorry.” I couldn”t stand the thought of taking away your hope. But I should have anyway.”
He holds out his right hand, staring down at it. I can”t help but stare too as he spreads his fingers, curls them in, then spreads them again.
”So that”s it.” His voice is flat. Exactly what I wanted to avoid. I”m so tired of doing this to people. ”My career is truly over.”
Nana better come through for him, because if I”m about to get his hopes up again, only to crush them a second time, I”m not sure I can handle it. Let alone if he can.
”Maybe not.”
He looks over his shoulder at me. ”What do you mean by that?”
”I talked to my grandmother. Asked her to dig deep and try to find a spell that will work.” I give him a pleading look. ”That”s another reason I didn”t tell you right away. I wanted to have some good news to go with it.”
”But you don”t.”
”I might.” I close my eyes and ask the deities for strength and compassion. ”Nana warned me that these higher magics, they come with a price. A sacrifice of some kind.”
He shakes his head. ”I don”t care. I”ll pay any price. I mean, it”s not like you”re going to take my eternal soul or something, right?”
”No, it doesn”t work like that.”
”Then I don”t care.”
I nod. ”I figured you”d say that. And a few minutes ago, while you were outside, I got a text from her. She didn”t give me details, just said she wants to talk after dinner tomorrow night.”
He”s still, absorbing this information.
”I mean, if you still even want to come to dinner. We can arrange something else if?—”
He grabs my hand where it”s laying on the sleeping bag. And for the first time since he came back to the tent, he meets my eyes. ”Sirona, I”m frustrated with you. I”m not ending things with us.”
The implied yet hangs in the air between us. Because if we fix his hand, he”ll be going to back to Chicago and we”ll be through.
I hadn”t realized I was worried about him ending it now until he says the words. I let out a long exhale and tears once again clog my throat and well in my eyes. ”OK.”
His shadowy gaze searches my face. ”I don”t...” He lets the words trail off and I”m too afraid of how he might end that sentence to ask.
He works his way into the sleeping bag and slides up next to me. ”Can I hold you?”
I nod. ”Yes. Please.” Always.
We wind our limbs around each other, my head nestled into the crook of his neck. He strokes my hair down my back, and I breathe in the fresh, earthy scent of him. We stay like that for who knows how long. I have no sense of what time it is; could be midnight, could be four a.m.
He presses a kiss to my forehead, then over my third eye, between my brows.
”Tell me if it”s too much, and I”ll be happy just holding you all night. But I would really, really like to get lost for a little while and make love to you.”
Love.
My heart catches on the word. But of course, it”s just an expression. This is a tender, fragile moment and asking to fuck me wouldn”t fit. That”s all.
I lift my face and press my lips to his. ”Please.”
We kiss, and time stretches and contracts. His cloth-covered cock is hard against my belly, but we”re in no rush. My pussy is wet and throbbing for him, but we take our time.
Eventually, he maneuvers his boxer briefs off and rolls to his back. ”I need to see you ride me.”
Hands on my hips, he guides me on top of him, straddling his hips. I rub my clit against his cock and my breath catches as he moans my name.
”Don”t make me wait,” he says. His unfocused gaze is on mine.
I give him a gentle smile, then imagine the condom on his cock, snap my fingers, and it”s there. A few more maneuvers of my hand and I”m lowering myself onto it.
”You feel so good.” He drops his gaze to my lips, then back to my eyes.
”You too.” I barely have the breath to get the words out.
We set up a slow, steady rhythm, our gazes locked together as his hips roll up to meet mine. I brace my hands on his shoulders and glide up and down on him. Each thrust rubs my clit against the root of his cock and makes me sigh.
”Yes, use me. Let me make you feel good.” He frames my breasts with his hands, thumbs sliding over to flick my nipples.
I gasp. ”You do. So good.”
Something starts to shimmer inside me, the beginning of an orgasm. But more. It”s amazing, but entirely new. Like he”s taking me to heights I”ve never visited before.
He strokes his hands down my sides, his touch heartbreakingly tender. ”You”re the sexiest thing I”ve ever seen in my life. Right now, this moment.”
”I feel it.” My chest breaks wide open, energy rushing in and flowing out. Something is happening, something beyond sex. This is going to be a hell of an orgasm.
”I can”t hold back much longer.”
I can only nod. This powerful bliss has robbed me of air. All I can do is keep riding him, keep chasing the shimmering mists of completion hovering so close to me. My hips move faster, my clit throbbing and my pussy pulsing around him.
When it all breaks, I”m surrounded by a beautiful purple light, an energy so exquisite I have to close my eyes because it hurts. Sensations swamp my body, beyond pleasure, beyond ecstasy, beyond anything I”ve ever imagined.
Far away, I hear Grant”s voice crying out my name as he, too, reaches his peak. The light wraps around him and, together, we achieve our pleasure in a bubble of purple energy. I”m tingling everywhere, shaking and grinding onto him, and when I open my eyes for a moment, the energy seems to be flowing from my own chest.
It vaguely occurs to me that this is strange, that I should be wondering what”s happening. This is more than an orgasm. This is something magical happening between us.
But the bliss is too all-encompassing. I can”t think. I can only feel. And I feel so... complete. At peace. Whole.
The light begins to fade, swirling into a fine lavender mist. The mist dissipates and disappears.
Only then do I feel in control of my body again. I feel more satiated than I ever have in my life, but also drained. Like I expended far more energy than is necessary even for sex.
And in an instant, I know. And it”s the most wonderful and horrible thing that could possibly happen.
I”m in love with Grant.
The knowledge weighs me down and I collapse onto his chest. He drapes an arm limply over my back. We lie like that for long moments, the only sound in the tent that of our heavy breathing.
Eventually, he pulls out of me and rolls us to our sides. He leans back so he can look me in the face.
”Sirona, what just happened? I mean, don”t get me wrong. That was amazing. I”ve never come so hard. I felt it in my teeth. But that was... that wasn”t just really great sex.”
”No,” I manage to whisper. I”m still so out of breath.
”Did you do some sort of magic spell? I don”t mind, but maybe next time…you could tell me first.”
I shake my head. ”Not me.”
”Do you know what it was?”
I roll onto my back and look up at him in the shadowy light.
”I think we just broke the curse.”