Falling for A Lie (The Lords And Ladies Of Ash #1)

21. Soren

Chapter twenty-one

Soren

O ne Month After Joining The Valkyrie

Five Months Since My Whole Life Changed…

“Nice to see you home, Little Mama.” Miles' deep voice greets me as soon as I step into my front door.

“What are you guys doing standing in the hallway like creepers?” I tilt my head, taking in the scene before me. A smile making its way to my face at Miles' tall slender figure standing in my entrance to my new home with my sisters and Finn flanking them, like a knight ready to take arms to defend my honor.

“We heard others with you, and curiosity had us snooping to see what was taking you so long to come inside.” Lena and Carla say in unison like a trained circus act and not the usual twin thing I've come accustomed to since they've gotten older.

“Oh, so you're snooping on your leader. Very naughty.” I laugh, ‘tsking’ with a slight wiggle of my finger at them like scolded children. Causing both males and my sisters to look at me like I've truly lost it.

“Come on, Queenie, you know we worry about you. Especially when that bitch is around.” Finn's Irish accent tickles my brain in all the right ways, sending shivers up my spine as he steps up to me with that wicked smile, like he knows its effect on me, “Let me help with that.” Before I can protest, he has his hands on my shoulders, helping me slide the leather jacket down my arms until I'm released from its warmth.

“Josie is just a pussycat that thinks someone is trying to take her owner away, all bark and no bite,” I say reassuringly as I reach my hand out to Finn so I can take my jacket he now has a hold of. But he doesn't pay me any attention as he hangs it up himself, letting his arm brush my exposed flesh in practiced precision.

“Yes, a pussycat that is currently eating our other bosses' pussy.” Carla mumbles groggily, cutting her dark hazel eyes in my direction.

“Ew, that's disgusting. But you're right she is. So she wouldn't want to fuck that up by fucking with Scar's favorite little puppet.” My voice is broken by a yawn.

“Yes, but she's Jace’s sister, so she's probably not the brightest crayon in the box,” Lena adds nonchalantly, stretching out her long arms as she eyes me with concern.

“Jace isn't going to find us, babe; we aren't the same women we were when we left Hazelton. We have trained killers amongst our ranks, and two of them live in this house with us for added protection.” My eyes swing to the two in question as they watch us go back and forth with amusement written across their handsome faces.

“Yes, we will end the stupid bastard before he even has a chance to touch his dirty boots onto our property. Nothing goes unnoticed with us around, Little Mama. You girls will be safe. That's a promise.” Miles says self-assuredly, not leaving room for argument from any of us.

“We are one, and that's how we will remain. We don't allow errors to be made, and we are The Valkyrie. We have thirty others under our thumb with the same mindset. You are our leader, Queenie. Wherever you go, we will follow. Wherever you need us, we will be there. That's the oath we took when you took the chance to swear us in. Two broken orphans that have been forced to work and prove their worth to their employer and not have a moment to actually live. You saved us from Scarlett. You saw potential, and for that, we owe you three our lives,” Finn declares, with their hand pressed to his chest like he's pledging each word all over again, with every fiber of his soul being offered at my feet.

“I'd do it all over again,” I say softly with a smile at the two men before me. I'd swear them in as the only two men in my ranks that I'd allow so close to my sisters. I have thirty-four soldiers who look to me to lead them to victory, each with their own reason for a better life and the protection this role offers them. I treat them with respect and dignity, and I never ask them to do something I wouldn't. In return, they give me their undying loyalty and the feeling of safety I've been missing since I left the four guys that sometimes occupy my mind.

“I'm going to see my boys, and I'll be heading to bed shortly. I love you guys, and get some rest. We have a fight we have to attend next week, undercover for The Ladies of Ash. I have to fight someone they suspect that's selling information to The Lords and if that's the case, The Valkyrie will be needed to interrogate and then execute them.” I let the words hang between us before I sidestep the others and make my way deeper into the house.

The excited sound of paws and claws slapping against the floor echoes as I enter the kitchen, where Draco and Sirius are waiting impatiently to be fed. As soon as I step fully into the room, Draco's head snaps in my direction while I walk to the other side of the kitchen. Their tails wag with quick swishes as they make small circles around the cupboard where their bowls are located.

Speaking to them as tiny children, instead of almost fully grown Pitbulls, seems pretty hilarious, “Hello, my darlings, are my babies hungry? And these mean old guys haven't fed you yet? Mommy has you babies, it's okay.” I open the fridge and grab two eggs from the carton and the beef liver as well. I make my way back to the kitchen counter place everything down, and then scoop their food into their bowls before mixing the egg and liver in. The dogs look at me with their tongues hanging out the sides of their mouths as their impatience only makes their bulky frames vibrate in anticipation for the food that they're about to devour like wild beasts instead of well-trained dogs. I hold up my hand and signal for them to stay as I walk back to where their bowls are placed, as I turn on their automatic water pipes that allow fresh water to enter their bowls.

With one word, I have their attention, and they are at my heels, waiting for the okay to start eating like the obedient, good boys they are. “Chow.” Without a moment's hesitation they are feasting.

Moving from my boys, I make my way back to the fridge to grab myself something to eat, the threats that Josephine throws at me has me opting out from something heavy and grabbing a granola bar and coke. If Scarlett wouldn't have stopped me, I would have stabbed the bitch where she stood and went about my night like nothing ever happened.

The fact that since I took the job opportunity from them last month, I have found six rats in our ranks and thirteen threats I personally delivered the killing blow to them all without hesitation and without remorse.

You'd think the bitch could show me the respect I was owed after I've sacrificed my moral compass to make sure they're not getting murdered in their beds by the Lords they're supposed to be equal with. How ironic that truly is.

The sound of footsteps coming up behind me has Sirius and Draco by my side, their teeth barred at whoever it is.

“Little Mama, call the pugs down. We want to debrief with you before heading to bed.” Miles stands with Finn at his side, the girls no longer in sight and probably already in bed. I was surprised they were up later than normal, waiting for my return with these two.

Draco growls lightly at Mile's, his ass on the cold ground in front of his brother as he waits for me to give him his next order. As Sirius sits beside me, his body is pushed as close to mine as he possibly can be without being in my lap.

“Now, Miles, you know Draco hates to be referred to as a pug. You're just asking to rile him up.” I reach down and softly pat Sirius’ head as I lean a little bit more forward, whispering the command to Draco, which has him turning his back and coming to join his brother beside me, no longer focusing on Miles or Finn, allowing the men to come and sit across from me at the kitchen island, folders resting in their arms waiting for me to look them over.

“Do we really need to do this tonight, or can we please do it in the morning? I'm so exhausted from all the running and jumping Scar and Josie had me doing today.” I groan out the pathetic excuse and add the sad eyes for optimal effect. All I get in return is laughter and the shaking of their heads.

“No, can-do, Little Mama. There's some stuff in here I think might interest you.” He slides the opened folder to me, and pictures of Caden leaving a seedy-looking cabin that looks like something from the wrong turn have me looking up at the men in front of me.

“What the fuck is this?” I motion at the picture with an abject of curiosity. Why the fuck is Caden out there of all places?

“Looks like Scar's pretty boy is hooked on that powder.” Miles' accent slowly slipped through the cracks. He's tried so hard to block his accent because he says he hates it. I, on the other hand, think he sounds like every woman's wet dream, especially when he calls me ‘Little Mama.’

The thought has me shaking my head slightly. Damn, I need to get laid soon. It's been way too long.

“Earth to Soren!” Finn waves his hand in my face, trying to force me out of my sexed crazed daydream I found myself in since seeing Caden's face again. The last man I fucked and the last man to see me in that vulnerable position.

“How many times has he been there?” I look up, shutting the folder to clear my head a little more so I can stay focused on the topic at hand.

“Do you want a daily or monthly number, baby girl? Because both numbers are shocking.” Finn says with a slight roll of his eye that matches the irritation in his voice.

“Yeah, I guess.” The sickening feeling rolling through my guts made me place my half-eaten granola bar on top of the counter, and my appetite was now lost.

Finn sighs, looking at the half-eaten bar like it's offended him personally as he grinds his teeth, his eyes going from it to my face. “Eat the rest, and we'll tell you. I know you haven't eaten all day, Soren. That's not healthy.” Miles mumbles his agreement, taking back the folder from my view and shutting it.

“I just don't feel like eating right now; I'm tired.” I look at them both, hoping they will give up and continue so we can be done with this part. Given the size of the folder, we are going to be here all night if we don't get the ball rolling.

But men are stubborn, and these men, in particular, really love to act like my boss when they believe I'm not taking care of myself like I need to.

We sit in utter silence for five minutes before I finally give in and eat the other half of the granola bar, begrudgingly cursing the two men before me with each bite. The smiles that grace their dumb faces make me want to throat-punch them both. They watch me eat and my mouth like they'd be happy to take over for the granola bar, touching my lips instead.

As I take the last bite with the exaggerated snap of my teeth, I wave my hand for them to continue. I'm now tired, irritated, and, for some weird reason, horny.

“Well, as we were saying, Little Mama. He goes to the dealer on the seedier side of Ashford at least thirty times, if not more, a month. He has been seen going into the actual cabin of horrors ten times in one day, always leaving with the same brown sack and always racing like his ass is on fire to get away. I can't say we blame him. The smell and vibe out there is disgusting and makes your skin crawl like a thousand tiny little ants are making their way over your flesh.” Miles visibly shakes as if he can feel said “ants” now by just recounting the information back to me.

I sit there taking in the new information and wondering if I should let Scarlett know that her golden boy is hanging around a known drug house that dabbles in the skin trade or if I should keep it to myself. We weren't necessarily trying to get information on any of the guys, but a target we've been looking for also frequents the area. We were trying to see if he followed a pattern that would allow us to snatch him without witnesses seeing us.This information on Caden was just an added bonus we could use to its advantage if the need arose. We'd shelve it for later use.“Okay, we'll keep this to ourselves for the time being. What's next?“ I lean forward with my head propped up on my palms, my elbows digging into the granite countertops as I wait for whatever else that needs my attention instead of the sleep my body and mind so desperately need.

Miles gazes at me warily before he begins to speak, revealing what I need to know, even though it pains me. “We spotted Jace and who I'm assuming is Alec at Ben’s house when we went to collect the paperwork he had been gathering for us on them. They were leaving with six black trash bags in tow, and their clothes were ruffled and stained with blood. We didn't approach the house until they had left, ensuring the coast was clear. However, once we entered, it felt like we had stepped into a bad horror film. Blood was everywhere, and the furniture lay toppled at odd angles as if it had been overturned for protection or thrown aside to deter their advances. Nothing remained of Ben; it was as if he had vanished, leaving only blood behind. We carefully combed through the scene until we discovered the hidden safe where he kept the important documents. Cleo is currently opening it for us. She will have it done by morning, and hopefully, we will be closer to bringing those sick fucks down. We are sorry about Bennington, Ren. We know he was a close friend and that he was also the reason you knew to escape after the attack. Hopefully, he left us with something in that safe that we can use to avenge him.”

My mind feels like a muddled, dark cloud as his words sink into my consciousness: Ben is dead. Ben is gone. He was my first friend and the first boy who ever confessed his love to me, and I knew he meant every word.

Tears began to stream steadily down my cheeks at the thought of Ben dying a horrific death at the hands of those monsters. I had pleaded with him to join me for his own safety, but he refused. He insisted that they would find him, which would ultimately lead them to me. He wouldn’t put the girl he loved in any more danger than I was already in. He deserved to live and not be ensnared in the chaos that Jace had inevitably created the night he attempted to kill me.

I don't realize I'm shaking with each sob until both men round the island and wrap me in a tight embrace that feels as if they are pushing all of my broken parts together. Draco and Sirius prod at my legs to get my attention and help ease me from the panic attack I didn't know I was experiencing.

The words feel as though they are coming from someone else, not from my own lips, as I state the painfully obvious to the last two trusted men in my life: “Ben moved to be closer to me; he lived only half an hour away in the neighboring town. Jace knows where I am now, or he’s beginning to piece it together. How long do we have until the monster is at my front door, trying to finish what he started?” Ice courses through my veins as the final piece of the puzzle falls into place. Only a select few knew where Ben had relocated. Scarlett had ensured he secured an informant position in The Lord's ranks. He no longer went by his first name unless you were part of The Valkyries or the group of Lords who swore him in; to others, he was known by an alias. So, how did Jace and Alec find him if it wasn't a traitor who informed them? Someone must have tipped off those two, and if that's the case, my fears of being discovered are more real than I had anticipated. I will need every available hand to help protect my sisters and the family I have built within The Valkyries over the past month.

The only thought that breaks through my downward spiral is the urgent need to seek protection from Scarlett's boys. If I want to prevent the life I have built for myself from falling into the hands of my psychotic ex, I must take action. They have protected me from him before, and even though I am stronger now than I was back then, I still need someone to watch my back while I keep an eye on everyone else.

Who could be better for the job than the devil, I know?

The devil's who are only a stone's toss away from my new front door. I'll give them whatever they ask for as long as they agree to protect me and the ones I love.

Strong hands lift me from the stool I was slumped on, as the panic attack stole the only strength I had left. I cradle my head into the crook of Finn's neck, my hands loosely thrown over his shoulders. The aftereffects of my panic attack make my body and mind more tired than they already are. Miles follows behind me, folder in hand,, as they make their way to my room on the far side of the second floor.

Once we are in I'm lowered to my bed with such delicacy as if I'm fine china, one chip away from breaking. Both men opt into crawling on either side of me, engulfing me in their strong arms as I doze off to sleep with visions of the night Jace tried to kill me and the stuff I've done since out of necessity and because I was told to.

I'm not sure how long I sleep, but when I open my eyes, I'm still sandwiched between a snoring Miles and Finn. Their strong arms hold me hostage like they’re scared of me being snatched away in my sleep if they don't keep me close.

At that moment, I knew that my decision to seek the guy's help was the only way to keep my family safe. I couldn't let what happened to Ben happen to these two or my sisters. I needed to find out who betrayed Ben, fulfill every order The Ladies demanded of me, and lead my group down the right path. But through it all I knew in my soul, I'd burn the fucking order and the world down over these four, the only family I have left .

I need to devise a plan for approaching the men I left behind five months ago and asking for their help. In exchange, I'd sacrifice whatever they demanded of me.

If they wanted my soul, they could have the tethered pieces.

They wanted my body, they could have it as well.

I needed to submit to them fully, I would.

I only want my family to be kept safe,

I don't matter as long as they live and the monsters haunting my every waking breath are wiped from the face of the fucking earth.