Chapter 3
Her mind was screaming at her to turn around and go back to the main house. She tried convincing herself that confronting Leo and his ‘little friend’ was not the look she wanted, but her soul cried out in pain.
Yes, she told him she didn’t need him.
Yes, she told him he wasn’t Amina’s father.
Okay, that last one may have hurt him more than she expected. But didn’t he know her by now? Didn’t he understand she was just talking shit because she felt pushed into a corner? Or that her actions meant more than her words?
For the past year, they spent almost every day together. He had become her friend. The one person who knew her better than almost anyone else. She could be herself around him, and he didn’t laugh at her or minimize her for not being perfect.
It didn’t matter if she looked at him with longing, wishing they could be so much more. That’s not the type of relationship they had, and she had to deal with it. But she could finally admit her words had torn something open in their relationship… their friendship. Even as a young girl, she was always told to watch her words. To not just say anything that came to mind. This week, she learned that lesson the hard way.
It was difficult not to hear his voice every day, see him when he came by for dinner, or pick up Amina from daycare. She checked her phone multiple times throughout the day to see if he had sent her a message. Or she would cook his favorite foods, hoping he would stop by. She had been such a fool.
Even Amina had been affected. She asked about Leo every day and wanted to know when she would see him again. There had been a few times when Camille had called when Leo had been at their house. It never failed that he would end up on Facetime with Amina, asking how her day had been. Whenever Amina asked when he was coming to see her, he would pause. If Shandra hadn’t been listening so closely, she would have missed the minor hitch in his voice when he told her he didn’t know.
As she walked across the green grass toward the stables, she thought about what she would say to Leo. How would she react if he and that woman were all cuddled up together? Her steps slowed the closer she got. Maybe this was the wrong thing to do.
Glancing behind her, she noticed Camille standing at the door leading into the kitchen, one hand cradling her belly. She knew her friend wasn’t happy with how things had gone down. Judging from the deep hurt she felt inside, Shandra realized her friend had been right this whole time.
She thought about Tristan’s earlier response, questioning if everyone was on Leo’s side.
What about how Shandra was feeling?
She was the one who had been left out in the cold.
He walked away without a backwards glance.
Leo was the one who acted as if it was no big deal to just cut her out of his life.
Now he was bringing strange women around her daughter.
That, she would never allow. How would those women treat her daughter? Would he pull away from Amina if one of his randoms asked him to?
So what if she sounded all over the place? Who cares if she had no true claim on him? That’s not how he made her feel when he’d been such an integral part of their life. He treated her and Amina as if they belonged to him. As if he loved her daughter. As if she were his…
Her thoughts made her freeze in place.
Her breath became short while her mind started replaying the past year. The sweet way Leo treated her and Amina. The overprotective way he went about making sure they were always safe. Although Tristan had appointed some bodyguards for them, Leo was always the one they deferred to for their orders. If he went out of town, he spoke with them first to make sure they were on point until he returned. Even if he couldn’t see them every day, he checked in by phone.
In his own way, he was trying to make sure she knew how important they were to him. And she threw that back in his face like it meant nothing.
Fuck.
Her feet moved again, faster this time, as she made her way to the stables. She had to talk to Leo. Make him understand that she had been wrong. She saw things so clearly now. Her baggage refused to let her accept what he was trying to give.
As she approached the doors, she heard giggling. Not the soft laughter of a child, but someone much older.
“Leo, baby. Why do we have to be here?”
“Listen, Andrea. Quit asking me that shit. I already said you can fucking leave. But if you do, don’t ever contact me again. I told you today was important.”
Shandra peaked around the corner and saw Leo standing next to Onyx’s stall, with his hands on his hips. He wore dark jeans, black boots, and a dark gray t-shirt. Both arms were covered in tattoos, which were on full display. A movie reel of those strong arms picking up Amina when she fell and scraped her knee replayed in Shandra’s mind. Or when they forced him to go to the playground, and he willingly followed her around to each slide or swing. So many moments of the three of them together flew through her mind. It only made her even sadder. More aware of what she had thrown away.
The woman standing in front Leo was the opposite of Shandra in every way. That knowledge and seeing them stand so close together almost broke her resolve. The most apparent differences were their skin tone. As she watched the pale-skinned, thin, blonde woman rub her hand along Leo’s arm, it only pissed her off.
Leo belongs to me.
The words were loud and clear in her mind, even if she had been too afraid to admit it.
“I know you said it was important, baby,” she cooed at him, which made Shandra grind her teeth even more. “You never said you had a daughter, so why does it matter so much? Listen, I’ll keep your secret. No one has to know you got your black goomah pregnant. As long as you don’t marry her, no one will care. Plus, half of them aren’t worth shit anyway. She should be lucky you’re willing to spend all this money to keep her out of the ghetto.” She stepped closer to him. “Leo, sweetheart. Forget about that little girl. Why can’t we go back to your place? We can spend the afternoon in bed. I can show you this nice little trick—”
Leo grabbed her around the neck. “What the fuck did you just say? You always find a way to say the vilest shit out of your dick-sucking pie hole. You know whose house this is and who his wife is, and you still bring that stupid shit here. I told you to be careful. I still try to be nice to you since your family has done favors for us, but you never listen. Get the fuck away from me and get the fuck out of this house before I lose my shit and disrespect the Don’s home,” he said, just before pushing her away. “Stupid bitch. I brought you here for a reason, but you’re too stupid to realize your place. And that little girl means more to me than you ever will. If you ever speak one more fucking word against her, or her mother again, you’ll regret it. Now get the fuck out of my sight.”
Shandra had to take a deep breath after watching that confrontation. Who did that woman think she was, talking shit about her and Amina? She was glad Leo cleared that shit up real quick. On the other hand, he never should have brought her here in the first place, especially if she thought that way about Black people.
“Hey momma!”
“Aarrrgghhh!” Shandra must have jumped ten feet in the air. So intent on listening to the conversation between Leo and the other woman, she did not take in her surroundings. When she turned around, she saw Amina, the trainer, and Tristan, walking up to her. “Hey, baby. Look at you. Is Buttercup being a good horse for you?”
Her baby looked so proud of herself. “Yes, momma. She’s good. Ms. Lila says I’ll be able to ride Onyx in no time. But I have to keep practicing.”
The trainer nodded before interjecting, “Ms. Shandra, your daughter is a natural. We want to take it slow, make sure she understands how to control the horse’s movements and is comfortable. But we’ll be here with her the entire time. We won’t let her go off on her own quite just yet.”
Tristan stared at Shandra with a curious look. He then leaned his head over to look beyond her after noticing the two people she had been hiding from. The small smile on his face told her the jig was up. She’d been caught red-handed.
Shandra ignored his smirk and kept speaking to Amina. “Well, I’m so proud of you, sweetheart. I knew you would be amazing.” Glancing at Lila, she asked, “Are you all done for the day?”
“Not quite. We wanted to come back here to get Buttercup something to drink and allow Miss Amina a bit of time with Onyx. I always find it best for small children to use the momentum with the training horse to help them get used to their full-size friends. We’re just taking a quick break, and then we’ll go out again for a bit. Plus, since she’s so young, we don’t want to have her out here for too long.”
Shandra nodded to herself, pleased with the approach. Tristan helped Amina off Buttercup and placed her on the ground. As soon as she had her footing, she ran full speed over to her other favorite person.
“Uncle Leo!” she yelled before lifting her arms to him, fully expecting him to grab her up. “I knew you would be here. I missed you.”
“I missed you too, Princess.” With his strong arms wrapped around her tiny body, Leo closed his eyes momentarily. He pulled back to look into her face and smiled. “I wouldn’t miss today for anything. Your first day riding your new horse? Nothing could have kept me away.”
“It’s because you love me, right?” Amina had no idea how that simple question affected the adults around them.
Tristan smiled knowingly while staring at his best friend as he gave his heart to a little girl with pigtails. While the man standing before him was one of the deadliest men in his circle, the little girl had Leo wrapped around her little pinky. He knew this because she had a similar effect on him. When his son was born, Tristan knew he would be just as crazy about him.
Wetness pooled in Shandra’s eyes. How could she try to deny what was right in front of her? Leo loved her daughter and would do anything for her. That’s what real men did. They took care of their family, the ones they loved, no matter what.
Andrea was disgusted. She knew men kept mistresses all the time. Some women were fine to fuck, but not to marry. If a child was born, then they needed to be hidden away. Just because Don Lucarelli wanted to bring his Black wife into the family, it didn’t mean everyone else should. It was an abomination.
Leo smiled at Amina. “Yes, princess. I love you very much. To the moon and back.”
The exchange was almost enough to make some adults turn away from the private moment. It was just that damn sweet. If one didn’t know any better, you would think they truly were father and daughter. Since Amina was biracial, no one would question if she belonged to Leo.
Lifting her hands to cradle his face, Amina stared into his eyes. “Can we go see Onyx? Will you come with me?”
“You got it, Princess.” He placed her on the ground and grabbed her small hand in his larger one. Finally, looking up at the others, his gaze focused on Shandra for a moment.
She wanted him to ask her to come along. Shandra even took a step in their direction. Then he spoke.
“Shandra.” One word. That was all he said to her. Then he walked back into the stables with Amina.
“I’m going to check on my wife,” Tristan said to no one in particular before heading back to the main house.
Everything else around Shandra faded away as she forced on Leo and Amina. Did he hate her? Was he unable to even look at her for more than a few seconds?
“So, you’re the one,” Andrea said with anger.
It took a moment for the words to register, but when they did, Shandra knew this woman would be a problem. “Excuse you? Who the fuck are you?”
“Me? Oh, I’m Andrea Ricci. Have you heard of me?” Shandra chose not to respond to her question. “Leo and I have known each other forever. When he asked me to come to the infamous Lucarelli compound today, I knew things had changed. I didn’t know how much. He’s been stringing me along for a bit. Even stopped calling or coming by just over a year ago. But today, he called out of the blue and said he wanted me to come with him today.” Her laugh had a note of hysteria. “I wondered what had changed. Then I saw that little girl. And you.”
Shifting her body, Shandra looked closer at the woman. Everything about her was perfect. Well, at least on the outside. From her words, she could also tell that Andrea was wicked evil on the inside. “What the fuck does that mean? And before you speak, be very careful with the next words that come out of your mouth.”
Andrea raised one hand to move her dyed blonde hair from her face. “You’re so cute,” she tittered. “He never told me he had a daughter. I was surprised when he said his little girl had a special day today. But now that I see her, and her mother, I understand why. I’m sure he loves your little girl and all, but you must know you will never be accepted. I mean, at least the Lucarelli wife comes from a family that has respect in the game. Of course, with them being Black, they can never be as important as the Lucarelli family. But their marriage can be excused as a business partnership. Still, I’m disappointed that so many of our men are going to the dark side. It’s one thing to fuck their goomah and keep them hidden away, but it’s something else to parade them out in public, giving them a life equal to their legitimate Italian offspring. It’s just a sad day to see the Lucarelli family dirtying up the family bloodlines. Even if they don’t put them down at birth, they could at least hide them away. Tainting the family with their mutts is just so… disappointing.”
And that’s when Shandra knocked Andrea the fuck out with one punch. The woman sprawled out in the dirt, blood gushing from her nose.
“Damn, that felt good,” Shandra mumbled, just as people ran over. She looked up from the woman and saw Leo and Amina standing a few feet in front of her. His harsh green gaze was on her, but all she could do was shrug. “Bitch fucked around and found out.” Pasting a smile on her face, she moved out of the way as the staff came to help the woman lying on the ground. Little did she know, this moment would impact her future, and her family would pay the price.