CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Akio
GETTING A, ‘you did it,’ text wasn’t on his bingo card. The only thing he’d done was tell Lucas his father’s dirty secrets. Things he’d realized he should’ve told someone―anyone―years ago. Yes, he could hide behind the fact that he didn’t know someone would take over where Kaito left off. That he was essentially in a sort of witness protection because of who he was. Whose son he was. But it didn’t lessen the guilt.
He’d seen the people Kaito took and sold. He’d looked at them and remembered being almost jealous of them. At least they’d had the fortune of not being born Kaito Yokota’s son. He’d known it was wrong to feel that way even then.
He’d been helping his father. Hell, he’d been pissed at Diesel when Kaito had taken him and Chris. He’d been so helpless and scared and seeing his brother so strong and loved? He’d wanted to hurt him. He’d seen his psychologist enough to know that he’d been in an impossible situation. He’d been abused and brainwashed by his father.
The abuse had gotten worse, and he’d fought harder, but it had no end. Even before that day, he’d known what he’d end up doing. Had known it was the only way and in the end, he’d grabbed a gun and fired it at Kaito. He’d shot him in the chest. He’d been frail to begin with, the most recent of his wounds only a few days old, and coupled with the adrenaline crash, it had been too much for his body.
He’d been in the hospital for weeks, Lucas occupying the chair next to his bed when Diesel and Chris weren’t there. Lucas’s face was the one he saw when he needed peace. When he needed something warm and tangible to hold onto. Lucas smiling down at him and cracking jokes as if he hadn’t watched him shoot his own father. As if Akio was just a person. Lucas saw him. He always had.
He jumped when his phone started buzzing in his hand. He looked down at it with a fluttering in his chest, but it wasn’t Lucas calling.
“Hey, sis.”
“Hey, you. Everything alright? Your text was kinda cryptic,” Addie said.
He barely remembered having texted her, but he knew he’d asked her a question he probably shouldn’t have because it was about his father.
“I…”
Addie understood better than most. She’d been kidnapped and held for weeks, destined for one of Kaito’s auctions. Diesel had saved her and a bunch of other little girls. She’d been stronger than him, though. She’d protected the other girls. Standing her ground whenever she could. Addie was a fighter.
He wasn’t sure how to get the words out, so he’d just said the first thing that came to mind. He knew it wouldn’t make much sense to Addie without some context.
He released a breath. “My father left a void.”
He could tell from the lack of sound that Addie had likely frozen at his words.
“A void?”
He could hear the hesitance in Addie’s voice and squeezed his eyes shut.
“For someone else to continue his work.”
“Oh.” There was a pause and then, “ Ooh .”
“I thought you meant inside you or something,” Addie said.
Surprisingly, that wasn’t the case at all. He wasn’t lacking a father figure. He had two pretty great ones.
“If I had told Lucas what I knew years ago, he could have stopped them. He could have saved all the people they’ve taken.”
“Akio,” Addie said, her voice stern and leaving no room for argument. “You can’t change the past. Trust me, if I could, I would have. We both would have, but we can’t. We can’t change who we are because of our past, nor should we want to. We survived and we’re stronger because of it.”
He soaked in her words, knowing they rang true, an echo of what his therapist had told him so many times over the years.
“If… if you had told Lucas back then, you would’ve ended up in witness protection and I wouldn’t have a brother. Hell, I probably wouldn’t have had a family.”
Chris and Diesel had seen the two of them together and knew they needed each other. Desperately. He wasn’t certain he would’ve learned to laugh again if it hadn’t been for Addie and her sarcastic self. If he hadn’t had someone in his life who was more than willing to make dark jokes about the shit they’d both been through.
“Shit happens, Akio. You didn’t make those bastards kidnap and sell anyone. They decided to do it and if it wasn’t your father’s men, it would’ve been someone else. There still would have been a vacuum for other traffickers to fill.”
He knew she was right. He knew it. But knowing it and feeling it were two very different things. He was starting to feel it, though, and he knew that was thanks to her unwavering belief in him.
“I love you.”
“Who wouldn’t? I’m fucking awesome,” Addie said, the amusement in her voice laced with just a hint of doubt.
“Yeah, you are.”
“I love you, too.”
He heard the tapping of Addie’s nails against what was likely her desk at this time of day. He already knew that whatever came out of her mouth next would have him cringing, but she somehow still managed to surprise him.
“Are you seeing Lucas?”
He choked on the breath he was taking, coughing while his sister laughed over the phone.
“What do you mean?”
“Are you screwing?”
His brows snapped together, and he almost wished they were face-timing so she could see the disappointment on his face.
“You’re not even old enough to know what that means.”
Her cackle told him she thought otherwise.
“I’m in high school, honey. Trust me, I know shit. Also, kudos for distracting me instead of answering. Too bad I’m smarter than you, huh?”
He dropped his head back with a groan.
“We’re not… screwing . That’s like a bastardized version of what we are.”
Addie’s squeal had him wishing he’d kept his mouth shut and hung up on her.
“I fucking called it, man,” Addie exclaimed. “I wanna be a bridesmaid at your wedding. Blue, I’ll wear blue. I’d totally rock a blue maid of honor dress.”
“I don’t know about wedding. We’re kinda just figuring things out right now but I can promise you that if we ever do get married you can wear whatever dress you want.”
“And that is why you’re my favorite brother.”
“I’m your only brother.”
Her cackle had him laughing, too, and for a moment he felt like everything might just turn out alright.