Fearless (The Powerless Trilogy #3)

Chapter 43 Paedyn

CHAPTER 43 Paedyn

The sword trembles in my hand.

I’m meant to drive it through his chest.

“No.”

The word is a choked whisper, not the scream I intended. It’s disbelief, denial in its most docile form. I’m shaking my head at him, feet stumbling back.

This is not an opponent. This is the boy who braids back my hair and dances for the both of us. The boy who would chase me to the ends of the earth if it meant he could hold me one more time. This is a man who would bury another for me—would bury himself , if only I asked.

He is a fool for me. He is my fool.

This can’t be happening. Why would Kitt allow this?

Kai raises a calming hand. “Paedyn—”

“No!” The scream rips from my throat, springing tears to my eyes. I turn then, lifting my rage to the railing above. And when my gaze crashes into that cool green one, I suddenly cannot remember which king I am looking at. “No! I won’t do it!”

The arena roars right alongside me, only they look forward to watching their mighty Enforcer cut me down. I stumble in the sand, seemingly unable to suck air into my lungs. Tears burn my eyes; anger clogs my throat.

This is a nightmare. This is pretend.

We were never supposed to fight each other again.

A rough hand tugs at my shoulder, whipping me around to face the stern expression Kai wears. “I need you to focus, okay?” I nod furiously at his quick words. “We have to make this fight look good if they are going to believe it. So that means you’re on your own to stay alive against whatever power I throw at you.” He nods to the arena surrounding us. “The Mute is gone. They want to see you fight Elites.”

I swallow a shuddering breath. “They want to see me die.”

His eyes flick over my face, as though seeing it for the first time. Or perhaps the last. “So don’t.”

I watch his skin turn to stone—then watch his fist fly toward my face.

I’ve barely ducked in time, the gust of air above my head making me gasp. I leap away from a hard hook to the stomach, dropping my sword and narrowly avoiding several cracked ribs. Borrowing a Shell’s power, he cycles through a combination of punches, pushing me on defense. I can do nothing but dodge, his rocklike skin making it impossible to land a hit of my own.

And the Enforcer is relentless. He throws countless stony fists at me until one clips my shoulder. I cry out in pain as bone crunches beneath his knuckles. The crowd roars in my ears as I clutch my arm, forced to duck beneath another flying fist.

I stagger away from each of his attacks, conscious only of the throbbing shoulder beneath my fingers. When my back hits the towering wall of the Pit, panic swells inside me.

I’m trapped.

“Kai—!”

I choke on my shout, forced to duck beneath another blow with words hanging from the tip of my tongue. His fist sinks into the stone behind, crumbling the rock there. Panting, I watch him struggle to rip free from the wall, sending chunks of stone flying.

Kai turns to me then, gray eyes flicking to my injured arm. His words are nearly devoured by the ravenous crowd. “Come on, Paedyn. We have to make this a good fight.”

I let my hand slowly slide from my aching shoulder and nod ever so slightly.

We are enemies here. We are pretend.

And if I am going to die, it will be one hell of a show.

Kai nods back. Then his hands ignite with fire.

I let myself sink into a familiar fighting stance, fingers wiggling at my side. When he launches that first ball of fire, I duck and roll behind him. Sand clings to every inch of me, but I don’t bother standing to my feet quite yet. I sweep a leg out, catching Kai’s ankles with enough force to send him toppling down beside me.

The packed sand he slams into has the air rushing from his lungs and a collective groan echoing from the crowd. I throw myself over him, pulling back my uninjured arm to let a fist fly toward his face. Knuckles connect with his jaw, followed by a stinging pain that shoots down my hand.

It’s odd to hit him like this, hard and intentional. Even as enemies, a piece of me always held back. Because that piece always belonged to the Enforcer, and perhaps I did not want to break it. But now, in this arena, I’ve never been more aware of the death that lurks within his veins. Power bends to his will, aches to obey.

I have never seen him without a soft spot for me. It seems today is that day. His desire for me to survive him seems to have erased all other sentiment he has for me. He is lost to this game, this power he has continually stopped himself from using against me. But the Enforcer knows he can’t throw the fight, otherwise I’ll likely be killed anyway, leaving us both dead for nothing.

I cock my arm again, ready to strike when his fingers wrap around my wrist. Searing, hot pain ignites beneath his palm as the Blazer ability scorches my skin. I barely bite back my scream, barely think through the dizzying pain.

The smell of burning flesh floods my senses before a wave of nausea crashes into me. Only yesterday, this stench followed my fury as I held Blair’s face into an open flame. Now it is I who’s burning.

I gasp before driving my knee into the elbow of his raised arm. His scalding hold on me breaks at the same moment I hear his bone do the same. The sickening snapping sound is accompanied by a hissing grunt of pain through Kai’s clenched teeth.

I wince, hating that I hurt him. Hating that we are in this position in the first place. But I force my stinging arm back, readying to—

His uninjured arm flies into my stomach, lifting my knees from the ground. The hit has me panting for air as I dangle off the ground. Only the strength of a Brawny could allow him to throw my body off his with such ease.

I’m flipping over his head, the sand flying toward my face. Kai’s hand is still pressed to my stomach, guiding my body over his when I grab hold of his wrist. Tucking my chin, I collide with the ground, rolling onto my back at the same moment I tug his broken arm flat against my shoulder.

He cries out in pain as the snapped bone pokes through bloody skin. I hold his arm at that awkward angle, shutting my eyes against the damage I’ve done. Our heads are nearly touching, bodies sprawled in opposite directions, both of us panting atop the sand.

Until I no longer can.

Thorny vines spring from the earth to clamp around my throat. A choked scream escapes my gaping mouth before the air is squeezed from it. The barbed branches tear at my neck as Kai breaks from my hold. He staggers to his feet, commanding the Bloom’s ability with a weak flick of his hand.

My fingers fumble for the dagger at my side when the vines tighten around my throat. Blood seeps between the leaves, thorns tearing at my flesh hungrily. A heavy blackness creeps into the corners of my vision as I lift the blade toward my own throat.

With one shaky slice, I cleave through the choking vines. The dagger’s tip sloppily grazes the side of my neck, likely leaving the beginnings of another scar there. The ravenous plants fall limply from my bloody skin to sink back beneath the sandy earth they sprung from.

I lie there, panting in pain as blood drips from my shredded throat. My blurry gaze is on the cloudless sky above until the ringing in my ears ceases, and the crowd’s dull roar reminds me where I am. With a grunt, I lift myself up onto my palms, eyes falling to Kai’s looming figure.

He runs a hand over the severed bone beneath his elbow, wincing slightly. My eyes widen when that dangling arm snaps back into place with a satisfying click. Kai sighs in relief before abandoning the Healer’s power for—

The Enforcer multiplies, creating a wall of muscle and a dozen stormy gazes staring back at me.

Cloner.

I scramble back, palms digging into the hot sand. My frantic gaze runs over the arena, searching for a plan before landing instead on the glinting something a few feet away. I’m suddenly on unsteady feet, blood dripping from the tears at my throat to trail a scarlet path between my breasts. I swipe a hand over it, accomplishing little more than adding sand to my sticky skin.

The Kais begin closing in on me, their powerful strides spurring me into a sprint. I lunge for the sword, my fingers curling around the hilt and—

A worn boot slams atop the blade.

A frustrated cry tears from my throat as I drive my foot into the clone’s knee. Bone crunches with the impact, but before he can tumble into the sand, another Kai is yanking me back. A calloused hand is on my shoulder, but when I throw an elbow at the jaw behind, his grip loosens. Taking advantage of his shock, I grab that arm, step into his chest, and muster enough momentum to throw him over my uninjured shoulder.

I barely hear the crowd’s responding hollers with the blood pounding in my ears. Turning, I snatch up the sword and raise it between my bloody form and the several other surrounding Kais.

Stay calm. Find the real Enforcer.

My eyes skim over them, studying every familiar figure. The “Psychic ability” I’ve so narrowly survived by has been rather buried these past few weeks. But I let it rush to the surface now, a flood of observations and comparisons.

So when my gaze locks with a particular gray one, I know I’ve found him.

His hand lingers just above the arm I broke, as though the bone hasn’t quite healed correctly. And that hurt belongs to him alone.

I’m dropping the sword once again and flipping my bloody dagger in an equally stained hand. A clone charges at me the same moment I let that blade fly.

Time slows. Kai reaches for me, fingers grazing my throat. The cool steel of my dagger sinks into its target. The clones vanish when Kai staggers back, a blade embedded in his shoulder.

I loose a shuddering breath before reaching up to graze shaking fingers over my throbbing neck, as if to ensure my head is still attached. Swallowing, I watch Kai pull the blade from his flesh with a pained grunt. He tosses it aside, blood gushing from the open wound.

Even knowing a Healer’s ability rests beneath his fingertips, I couldn’t bring myself to aim for the heart. Everything about this fight already feels too real, and if I were to bury my blade in his chest, I fear a piece of me would die instead.

Our eyes lock across the stretch of sand, blood dripping from the damage we’ve caused each other. The angry cut through Kai’s lip is evident even at this distance, as is the deep dagger wound above his collarbone. I sway on my feet beneath the beating sun, shoulder aching and throat throbbing.

Through the pain, I muster a small smile, one that is only for him. One to reassure that our pretending is just that. This audience alone keeps me fighting the Enforcer when I wish for nothing more than to collapse against Kai.

My soul is hopelessly tethered to his.

So when he suddenly Blinks into nothingness before my eyes, teleports behind, and drives a knee into my back, I wonder for the first time if perhaps I am the fool.

My body slams into the sand, nearly swallowing a mouthful as my face scrapes against the rough grains. A kick to the ribs has me rolling onto my back, coughing blood. Through a blurry haze, I see Kai standing over me, his expression unreadable.

He’s not himself. It’s as though every emotion has been muted. As though something other than pretend is guiding each blow.

Maybe he really does want me dead.

Another kick to the stomach.

Maybe he’s hated me this whole time. For what I did to his father—

I curl in on myself when the toe of his boot sinks into my stomach again.

For what I did to his brother—

Something cracks inside me, and I’m not sure if it is my heart or a rib.

For what I did to him.

A strangled cry claws up my throat, the product of pain and panic. I lash out with the last of my strength, aiming a foot for his knee. My boot collides with the glowing force field of a Shield, the purple hue warding off my attack.

With wide eyes, I slowly lift my head, scared of what I will see on his face. And yet, even more terrified that I will see nothing there when he looks down at me. The sun is blotted out behind his threatening figure, though its rays comb through that wavy hair like a halo. As though I’m staring at the angel of death.

Since stealing those silvers from him on Loot to fleeing his pursuit across the Scorches, I have never feared him more than I do in this moment. It’s the Enforcer who stares down at me, not the Kai who counts my freckles. It’s the Deliverer of Death in this Pit, not the man who would hunt down anyone who dared hurt me.

Is this an order? Did Kitt command him to kill me?

Terror courses through me, an emotion I’m unaccustomed to when in Kai’s presence. Rolling onto my stomach, I dig my fingers into the hot sand and abandon all dignity. Panting, I crawl away from him, tears stinging my eyes.

A sudden sob slips past my lips, jolting my bloody body as I scramble away aimlessly. My shoulder aches as it strains to hold my weight. Blood drips from my neck to speckle the sand beneath.

His shadow falls over me, and terror grips the heart that once felt nothing but love for him. He is devastation dressed with the shell of devotion.

So this is it. In the end, an Azer will always choose duty. And my death has just become that.

Laughter echoes all around, drowned out only by my racing thoughts. The Elites holler at my cowering form. They chant for their Enforcer to finish me. And for the first time in my life, I don’t fear Death.

I fear him.

Dragging my fingers through the sand, I grasp enough to throw into the stoic face looming above. His shadow staggers back before my feet are suddenly under me, sand flying from my heels as I stumble away. Pain pounds through my body, nearly pulling me back to the ground. But I run, tears doing the same down my bloody cheeks. My lungs burn as I try to gulp down the thick air—

The sand erupts beside me.

I’m thrown backward with the impact, part of the Pit flying up with me. I feel myself scream but can hear nothing through the ringing in my ears. Colliding with the ground, my body rolls, only to nearly be hit by another explosion.

Kai has taken the form of an Ignite. And he’s going to blow me to pieces.

Everything is hazy. I try to stand, but my balance is fleeting, like trying to grasp wind between my fumbling fingers. The world is muffled. Blood trickles from my ringing ears as I stagger into a run. The ground tilts beneath me with every step, but I force my feet forward as I try to outrun the inevitable.

Another blast has the sand beneath my feet caving in. I scream, ankle twisting before I’m suddenly falling into the sinking chasm. Hot sand envelops me, rapidly climbing up my body as I slip farther into the Pit.

I’m gasping for air, flailing for the surface. This only pulls me down faster. Sand rises to sting my raw neck and trap me beneath. Another scream pours out of me, this time a desperate plea for him. For the boy I love, not the man ordered to make me his next mission to complete.

“Kai!”

My voice cracks as sand slips over my chin.

I’m going to be buried alive.