Fierce Monarch (Gilded Empire Book 3)

Chapter 11 – Dominic

Mari disappeared into her room the second we got home. She’d been silent since she’d seen the article, drowning in her own thoughts and plans. Every time I looked at her, I saw the wheels turning as she tried to figure out how to fix this. How to come back from this.

How to survive.

The silence, I expected, but everything else made me wonder if she wasn’t in shock. I was about to check with Greyson when Troy Kincaid texted again. I fought the urge to snap my phone in half.

I’m giving her a week. If it’s not dealt with, I’m going to see how the other half lives.

This motherfucker.

Kincaid had been with the Marcosas since Mario ran the family, and now he was going to bail? Fuck that.

It’s already taken care of, but I’ll be sure to let Mari know you’re looking at other options.

It’s not personal. It’s business.

Maybe to him, but I was watching the love of my life lose herself with every hit Cash landed, and I hated it. I didn’t know how to help Mari.

Grey stopped next to me, and we watched her door somberly. “She’s breaking.”

“Are you surprised? With all the shit the last few years have put on her, I’m shocked she lasted this long.”

“We have to fix her.”

There was the rub. We couldn’t. Mari was hurting, she was betrayed, she was in agony.

And she was the only person who could work through it and find her way to the other side, to healing.

“We have to give her a soft place to land,” I corrected just before the door opened.

She’d changed into leggings that hugged her ass, a sports bra, and some sneakers, the whole outfit black with electric hints. The bright color felt more like a warning than a fashion statement. Danger.

Mari twisted her hair into a braid as she walked down the hall to the gym. Technically, the gym could be more easily accessed through the elevator hallway outside the penthouse, but my guess was she felt too fragile to be seen at the moment. Too close to breaking.

Too close to snapping.

While Greyson stalked her, I rushed to my room to get changed, grabbing a set of clothes for him too. I felt a knot in my chest that constricted the longer Mari’s self-imposed isolation continued, the part of me that demanded to protect her and soothe her growing restlessness. I wasn’t sure I could handle another night separated from her.

Then I walked into the gym and knew it wouldn’t be necessary.

Mari was already attacking the bag. Her arms and legs blurred as she took out her frustration at Nate and Cash, Rafael and Joaquin. She kicked like she was knocking her enemies to the ground one by one. Considering how fast she’d gotten to work, I knew she hadn’t warmed up, and I could feel the strain in her arms and wrists as if it were my own. If she didn’t stop, she’d cause damage. Every punch was harder and sharper than before, aimed to kill. Her assault held nothing back, even when Greyson’s veins bulged with the effort of holding the bag steady. This wasn’t working out; it was fighting demons, and Mari was winning.

Except she hadn’t wrapped her hands, so the bag was taking as much blood as she offered. Grey’s brows furrowed when he realized she’d split her knuckles open, and I knew we were both thinking of her wrecked hands after Cash got ahold of her. Her fingernails mangled and aching.

“Reina—”

“Just hold the bag.”

His hands tightened to keep it steady, but when he looked at me, he seemed lost. For the first time ever, Grey didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know how to help or where to go to get Mari back to herself.

The longer I watched her, the more I realized he couldn’t.

But I could.

I had to. Someone had to direct the rodeo until Mari was on her feet again, and tonight, that was me.

“Enough.”

Mari didn’t even slow down, throwing another set of punches harder than before.

I could practically hear her thoughts all narrowed down to what was in front of her. Breathe, hit, breathe, hit.

“I said, enough!” Sweat dripped down Mari’s neck as I gripped her arm and twisted, shoving her back against the heavy bag. Greyson snarled behind us, and I could feel him standing taller, getting ready for a fight. Even when he was uncertain, he knew when to protect, but there was letting Mari work out her frustrations and there was helping her self-harm, and he was skirting the line too motherfucking closely.

I shot him a glare that very clearly said, stand down.

Greyson shifted, bouncing a little on the balls of his feet so he could move quicker if he had to, and I rolled my eyes. “I’m not going to hurt her. She’s doing that well enough on her own.”

Indignation was a lash across Mari’s drawn face. “Now, hold on!”

“No.” My gaze flashed down to hers, and I saw every ounce of turmoil she was trying to hide. Her chest heaved as she tried to take in enough air to feel better, to calm down. But it wouldn’t come. The certainty that she was past helping herself battered against my defenses, begging me to help, to heal, but I stayed calm. Steady and sturdy as a rock. I would ground her. I could do that.

“You have a choice. Do you want to hurt, or do you want relief?”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Greyson snapped. He hadn’t moved from behind the bag, but I had no doubt he’d pull me away if it came to that. “If you put a hand on her?—”

“She’s fraying.” My chin jerked toward Mari, whose eyes were too wide, her breathing too fast. Not that she realized it. This was Mari at her most basic. All sensation and need, none of the put-together queen we were accustomed to. “Look at her.”

Grey peered around the bag and swore. He saw it now. This was the true creature we’d devoted ourselves to, this feral being with the face of our love. It was easy to praise a goddess when she was benevolent, but it was something else to worship her when she was at her most needy, her most wicked.

And worship was what I intended to do, despite how it was going to look.

“Everything that’s been happening has built up, and she’s got nowhere to send that energy. Fighting should have helped, but it didn’t. Fucking is an option, if you’re both up for it.” I didn’t have to ask Grey to know his answer. He couldn’t hurt Mari, even if she needed it, and she did. She really, really did.

Mari spent every day making life-and-death decisions. That level of power took a toll, and some people couldn’t handle the emotional accumulation. They had no way to excise the overabundance, and it rotted them from the inside out. Mari was one of those people. We had to break her so she could heal again. In this case, we had to fuck her into submission, forcing her out of her head and into some form of subspace where she could let it all go and come back to center. It wasn’t going to be pretty, but it was going to be necessary.

Greyson swallowed and looked away. “Not like this.”

I nodded, and he looked relieved when I left it at that. Being unable to do what had to be done was a problem in most cases, but I didn’t consider it a weakness when someone else could take up the slack. We were a family; where one failed, another succeeded. There was a reason one man would never be enough for Mari. I just had to hope two would, because Grey and I were never letting her go.

“Agreed.” Mari’s voice wavered like she wasn’t sure about her answer, but I took it at face value. If it wasn’t an enthusiastic yes, it was a no.

No fucking. At least, not yet.

“That leaves feeling. You in?” I stared down at her, knowing she was almost to the point of no return. All the shit with Nate and Cash was poisoning her from the inside out. I could almost see the blackness creeping into her gaze, the recklessness that would get her killed. We had to fix this before there was nothing to save.

“No, but if I don’t try something, I’d have to resort to more destructive methods, and I don’t have the time for a hangover.”

As if getting drunk was the worst she could do to herself.

I let her go, stepping back to give her space as I pointed to the floor. “Lie on your stomach, arms at your sides.”

“Is this a joke?”

“Do I look like I’m joking? On the floor.”

Mari looked at Greyson, but she eventually dropped to her knees. When she didn’t move beyond that, I clicked my tongue for her attention. “You can use a safeword.”

But she wouldn’t. She needed this as much as we did.

For every moment of anxiety that Mari had, Grey and I shared it. We’d felt the betrayal that rocked her. We were stressed and angry about the Wolf and Rafael. We’d been at her side through everything, and we were close to fraying too.

Tonight, everything changed. For the better, I hoped.

It took longer than I liked, but eventually, Mari lay down. The moment her belly touched the mat, she hated it. It didn’t matter that the only two people in the room were ones she trusted with her life—or the fact that Grey strode over and locked the door at my urging—she felt too vulnerable, and vulnerable was bad.

Which was why she squirmed and fought like a cat when I pressed softly on her back.

“Dominic—”

“Arms down, mariposa. It’ll all make sense in a minute.”

But she was too far into her hindbrain, so she scratched and clawed, bit and tore. My arms were a mess by the time I finally had her hands shackled in my own. Grey watched closely, ready to beat my ass if she said the word, but she didn’t. She needed the fight and the surrender equally.

Mari’s cheeks were wet with tears of frustration, anger, and grief, though we all pretended to ignore that for the time being. She vibrated underneath me as I slowly gave her more and more of my weight until she held it all. The pressure shouldn’t have felt good. She was already suffocating under the weight of everything. The last thing she needed was more, but the longer I lay on top of her, the more tension released until she was only slightly stiff below me.

Progress.

I didn’t touch her beyond that. Didn’t kiss her or grind my body into hers. This was about connection and release, and the longer it went on, the better it turned out.

“Why does this work so well?” She finally groaned, letting her muscles melt into the mat below. I felt the vibrations through my chest, and it soothed me as much as having her close did. Like she was whispering to the animal inside me that we were okay. Everything was fine.

I hummed above her, adjusting so I could stroke soft circles along her wrist with my thumb now that she was done hurting me. My arms were slicked with blood, but I’d wear those wounds with pride. “It puts your autonomic nervous system into a sort of ‘rest and recover’ mode. Pressure and weight like this help with anxiety.”

Greyson cocked his head, eyes darting over Mari’s face as he watched the angst slowly drain away, leaving only relief. “You’re acting like a human weighted blanket.”

“Exactly.” I chuckled. “The other option was an ice bath, but I decided it would be too much if you were still shocky from earlier.”

“I’m not shocky,” Mari snapped.

I nuzzled her neck, brushing my lips against her skin. “I know that now, but it wasn’t a risk I wanted to take.”

After my nod at Grey, he took over. “How can we fix this?”

“You said Ronnie and the others are?—”

“We’re not talking about the article or the Wolf, or even Cash. We’re talking about you,” I said gently. As expected, she locked up underneath me, so I adjusted my weight to press her back down against the floor. “Don’t bolt. Just talk to us. We’re your partners. Let us be there for you. We can shoulder some of the burdens.”

“There’s nothing for you to do. I’ve got to sort through this alone.”

I lifted onto my knees and rolled her over, needing her to see my face. When she was on her back, I huddled over her body, palms cradling her cheeks and forcing her to stay with me. “Maybe, but I’m not going to let you drown under the weight of the world, Mari. Use me.”

“Use you?”

“Yes.” I nuzzled her cheek with mine, feeling her sigh at the touch. “I’ll take some of it off your shoulders so you can breathe. Just tell me what’s wrong.”

“I can’t stand him being the last one to touch me,” she whispered. I leaned back to see tears lining her eyes, though I knew she wouldn’t let them fall. “I hate it. I hate him and his soft touches and his fucking words. I can’t get them out of my head, and I’m so… I just… I can’t do this anymore, Dominic. I need it to stop.”

Her little gasp killed me. This was Mari’s version of begging for help, reaching out to us and praying we’d pull her from the depths. The side she was only showing because she trusted us, because she loved us.

Of course we’d pull her out. She was ours.

Our woman. Our love. Our queen.

We’d always pull her out.

Greyson and I looked at each other, and though I could see the wariness in him, he nodded, reaching for Mari’s hand as he made himself comfortable close by.

I stroked Mari’s hair back gently and kissed her lips with the softest graze. “Don’t worry, mariposa. We’ll fix it for you.”