Chapter 21
Chapter Twenty-One
Sloane fought back tears all the way to the mountains, her every thought replaying the night she’d spent with Gage. With the aftermath of knowing what it was like to be loved. Feel loved.
What would she do if her plan failed? Would she be able to make it back to Gage? Back to Carolina Cove?
The fear that she wouldn’t make it back—the doubts that plagued her because of exactly who her father did business with—had made her decision last night without an ounce of remorse.
In her heart and soul, she knew who Gage was to her. She knew. But knowing and being free to follow her heart were wholly separate things.
Maybe she should have waited. Gage would be hurt by her disappearance.
But she hadn’t been able to force herself to even think about leaving without sharing that intimacy with him.
Because if she didn’t make it back, she had to know what it was like to really love someone. It was a gift she’d given herself.
She choked back the pressure and sting of tears to focus on her anger—and the plan.
For the first time since leaving her old life, she’d found a place that felt like home. She’d wanted to stay. Truly stay. But she couldn’t. Not without risking Gage’s safety and businesses—everything.
GPS had tried to take her on the main highways, but Sloane knew she needed time and space to both plan and prepare herself mentally and emotionally for what she faced.
That, and the fact she didn’t want Noah on her tail following her back. Once he figured out she wasn’t at work or at home—Gage’s home—Noah would head out behind her.
And she wanted to give him plenty of time to make the trek so he’d be there to witness her owning her own life.
She wanted Noah present for her big speech.
Wanted all three of them there so no one had any doubts as to how serious she was about them leaving her alone.
Even if it meant risking herself by being in their presence and possibly never seeing Gage again if her father decided to call her bluff and physically force her compliance—until her fail-safe kicked in, at least.
Her plan depended on…so many things. Some within her control.
Most not.
She’d never stood up to her father. Not once.
Not really. Oh, she’d argued and had the usual teenager and college-girl spats, but when things had gotten real?
She’d runaway like a coward. Noah showing up to demand she return to college and then someone jumping her college boyfriend had been the last straw.
Yes, it had scared her at the time. But that danger terrified her now. The thought of someone hurting Gage infuriated her and left her shaky and ready to do harm herself.
Because if she didn’t do something about it, when would it end?
She couldn’t be a coward any longer. If she had any hope of living her life, of being her own person. If she wanted to have a family and settle down someday— It meant standing up to her father, her brothers—once and for all.
It meant reclaiming ownership of her life and making it clear should something happen to her—to Gage or any of them…
She wrapped an arm around her stomach and held tight, the other clenching over the steering wheel as she drove.
Her plan meant facing the fact that her very powerful family had ties to very unsavory people who might just make her disappear if they discovered she was a problem and decided she was too much of a liability.
It was a risk.
A huge risk.
A terrifying, she-really-could-die risk.
But she couldn’t go on living the way she had been. Years on the road. Never allowing herself to get close to anyone because she knew it would only hurt worse when she had to move on.
Giving her father control of her life because she lived in constant fear.
This was it.
If she had to choose between fighting or fleeing, she was going to go down swinging with every bit of fight she had left inside of her.
It was the only way of keeping Gage and their future—if they had one—safe. Of getting her so-called family out of her life.
Otherwise, she’d never be free or safe and would be forced into a marriage–of–control, according to Noah.
She couldn’t let that happen. She wouldn’t. She had to take control away from the people who weren’t in charge and be her own person.
So, she drove from the coast to a suburb of Cincinnati, every hour filled with her thoughts and self-talk to buck up her courage and practice the things she had to say to the man who didn’t see her as a daughter but as a commodity.
To think of Gage and how it felt to love him. To remind herself of why she braved this mess and potential danger. That it wasn’t only for herself but for him. For them.
She could only imagine how angry he’d felt waking up to find her gone. How he’d probably pace and tug at his hair at the fact she’d so willingly crossed the line with him and then disappeared.
Her man was all about control, but right now Gage couldn’t take that from her. This was her problem. Her issue that had to be fixed before anything else could happen between them.
She’d stop to rest and reach Chicago tomorrow morning. Then, she’d meet her father face-to-face and make it clear she was no longer running but standing her ground.
Sloane pulled off the road into a chain restaurant parking lot known to welcome overnight travelers.
Before settling in, she carefully covered her windows using towels or clothes, to not only block out any wandering eyes but the cold.
Carolina Cove evenings had grown cool in the last few weeks, but she’d say by morning there would be snow on the ground here.
She shivered as she climbed between the seats into the back and found the sweatshirt she’d taken from Gage. The front had UNCW in block stitching, but more than anything, it smelled like him, and right now, she needed him surrounding her like a hug.
Sloane put her coat on over top the sweatshirt and other clothes then settled in for the night. But despite how tired she was from driving and thinking and the emotional toll of what had taken place between her and Gage…
She squeezed her arms around herself a little more, snuggling tight against the seat back behind her and pretending it was Gage’s hard body. Then she closed her eyes and remembered every kiss and touch and whisper.
She wouldn’t allow herself to look at her phone while driving, but there had been a blaring lack of notifications. So she looked now and—nothing. Not a text. Not a phone call. Nothing from Gage.
But what had she expected when she’d left him—Mr. Control—without a word?
So this was what it felt like, Gage mused, staring up at the star-studded sky as he sprawled lengthwise across one of the benches along the boardwalk.
He’d always had that feeling of loss. People leave. Sometimes against their will—like when his parents were taken from him and his siblings. But other times? They leave because it’s just what people do.
They got tired of waiting for him to come home from work.
To pay attention to them. To slow down on the hustle and grind and just be in the moment.
He’d lost several girlfriends that way. They’d just…
faded away. Some with a little more notice than others.
One had left, and it had taken him a month to realize he hadn’t seen or heard from her, and… he’d felt nothing.
But Sloane was different. She probably had a list of reasons for leaving too, but he didn’t care. All he cared about was the pain shredding his insides and the fact that she’d crawled under his skin much deeper than he’d even been aware.
The cold, biting air coming off the Atlantic seeped into his sweat-damped clothes as he tried to catch his breath from the punishing run he hadn’t planned on taking.
Turns out, he couldn’t outrun his thoughts or the anger pulsating through his blood and body.
All he could do was hope Dawson was right and that Sloane might return by Christmas.
But what if she didn’t?
What if she just kept going? What if her statement about coming back was just another lie meant to throw him off?
To give her a head start so he wouldn’t go looking for her?
So that when Noah came looking and discovered her gone, they’d inform him of her decision and potentially throw him off her trail as well?
Two full days had passed since Sloane had left Carolina Cove. Despite his desire to text or call, he’d reined it in. She’d left him. Why should he make the first move? Any move? After all, she’d made it perfectly clear what her feelings were for him when she’d walked out after their night together.
But the not knowing if she was okay crazed him the most. She was a woman alone out there in a world where men took advantage far too often.
She’d already gone through that with a boss who wouldn’t pay her after she’d turned him down.
What if she ran into trouble on the road?
Broke down somewhere? Just…pulled off for gas and was noticed by the wrong sort of people?
It happened every day.
And despite the fact it was now officially Christmas Eve eve, that just meant crime ramped up.
A loud groan left him at the thought.
Had she actually gone to Chicago? Or was she on the run again? Back on the road to God only knew where to try to get away from her brother and family?
The questions flooded his mind on repeat, and he couldn’t escape them.
But Sloane’s message to not follow? No matter where she’d gone, that stayed true.
And if this was love, he could say with one hundred percent certainty that it sucked.