For Fox Sake

Chapter 8

Jake

“Fruit punch?”

“Sounds great. Thanks.”

Ryan hands me the juice box before settling in the Adirondack chair beside me. “Sorry, I don’t have anything more adult-ish.”

“I don’t drink, so it’s perfect.”

Her head tilts. “You mentioned that the other day. You used alcohol to avoid dealing with everything.”

“More or less.” I avert my gaze to the flickering flames in the firepit in front of us. “It took me longer than I care to admit that I can’t have even one drink without it turning into drinking to excess. It’s easier to keep a tiger in a cage than on a leash.”

Why am I always talking to Ryan about things better kept on the inside? I take a long draw on my juice.

I’m honestly not even sure exactly how I ended up here, sitting around the firepit in Ryan and Ari’s backyard alone with Ryan.

After I helped them clean up the backyard, I offered to help with the kitchen and dishes while Ari got ready for bed.

I couldn’t help but listen in to some of the bedtime routine, which included singing off-key Taylor Swift songs in the bathtub and Ryan reading to Ari in all kinds of funny voices. Then Ari delaying bedtime by asking for a glass of water and needing to use the bathroom at least three times before it was finally over.

She’s a good mom. An aunt mom, according to Ari. I definitely want more information on that. Where’s Ari’s dad?

“Thank you for helping with all the cleanup. And for Ari’s gifts.”

I managed to grab her some clothes and then stumbled across a book, TheVelveteen Rabbit, in the toy section. It came with a plush rabbit. I shouldn’t have grabbed it. I almost didn’t. But it was one of Aria’s favorites. She’d even had the same Velveteen Rabbit stuffed animal. Without even meaning to, my hand reached for it and tucked it under my arm with the other items. I just had to get it.

“It’s not a problem at all. I’m sure you’re exhausted, and I truly have nothing else going on. My big plans tonight would have involved sitting on my porch alone. At least now I have good company.”

I lift the juice box in her direction, and she taps her own against it with a laugh.

She settles back in the seat, taking a deep breath and shutting her eyes while the flames dance in a honeyed glow over her features.

Her dark hair has been scraped back into a short ponytail. She washed her face and changed into sweats while she was getting Ari ready for bed. She must be exhausted. And yet attraction sizzles in the air between us, like a rope I could reach out and tug on.

We sit in silence for a minute, while fire crackles and the wind rustles in the leaves overhead.

I almost don’t want to ruin it. But this is also an opportunity to get some answers to questions that have been plaguing me since my conversation with Ari yesterday morning.

“It was a good party.”

She opens her eyes, her head rolling toward me. “It was great. I am so glad it’s over.”

“It’s got to be hard, doing all of this yourself.”

One shoulder shrugs. “I have Bernie. And you helped me clean up so not too much work at all.” Her gaze narrows. “Was that your sneaky way of asking where Ari’s father is?”

The corner of my mouth tugs up. “Partially. I was curious because Ari mentioned something yesterday about you being aunt mommy?”

She nods once. “Right. Ari is technically my niece. Mia was Ari’s mom.”

The pieces realign in my head. Ari just turned six, and on the memorial in the hospital, Mia died almost six years ago. Wait— “She died giving birth to Ari?”

She winces, glancing toward the back door. “Yes, but it was because of her heart condition. She knew the risks when she found out she was pregnant. But she wanted Ari more than anything in this world. No one could convince her otherwise.”

“The dad didn’t want to be involved?”

She sighs, her head leaning back against the back of the chair. “Mia never said who he was. She went to some conference for the hospital and hooked up with someone. It was a one-night stand. I think he was a doctor or something, maybe even married. She would just say he wasn’t available.”

“Have you ever thought about trying to find him?”

Her brows dip. “It might be bad of me, but I don’t really want to know. What if he wants to take her? I couldn’t handle that. And maybe it would ruin his life, if he’s married. He doesn’t live here, I know that much, and I couldn’t bear to part with her. Is that wrong?”

I shake my head. “No. You’re doing the best you can.”

She gives a half shrug. “Maybe when she gets old enough, I’ll let her decide. We can do one of those genetic match sites or whatever. I just, I have enough right now on my plate, and losing Mia was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to go through. I couldn’t handle losing Ari too. But you understand. You lost a sister. How did she pass? If you don’t mind me asking?”

I swallow. I never talk about it. My chest gets tight and heavy, throat closing up. But somehow the words push their way through. “It was a car accident.”

She winces.

And then even though my trachea is probably a pinpoint, the words keep coming.

“We were in the car together when it happened.”

There’s a long pause. I stare up at the night sky, focusing on a wispy cloud passing over the moon, unable to bring myself to look at her.

“Well, fuck,” she says.

A surprised laugh barks out of me. I turn my head to meet her gaze. “That might be the most appropriate response ever.”

She groans, slamming her juice box on the small table between us. “Death is fucking stupid. I have to say it sometimes. It’s the worst. It’s impossible to fathom that someone who means so much can just be gone. Forever. Someone said to me once that grief is love with nowhere to go. I know you can’t have one without the other, but it fucking hurts. It sucks.”

Truer words have never been spoken. “It really does suck.” My fingers drum on the arm rest. “After the car accident, it was a rough few years. My dad never quite recovered from the loss.”

“And then you took care of him when he had cancer.”

I nod.

“You said you had other family too?”

“Sisters. Four of them.”

Her brows lift. “Wow, four sisters? Are they older or younger?”

“All older than me. Finley, Mindy, Piper, and Taylor. Finley is the eldest. She raised the rest of us. Our mom took off when I was one. Finley was eight at the time. After Dad died, she ran our family property singlehandedly. I helped, but I was mostly a burden.”

“I’m sure that’s not true.”

I hold up a hand. “Oh, it’s very true. I was coping with everything that had happened by swimming to the bottom of every bottle I could find. And it’s like they say, first you take a drink and then the drink takes you. We almost lost the property.”

“I’m sure that was due to more than just you.”

I dip my head in acknowledgment. “That’s true, but I didn’t help. We were struggling to keep it afloat. We had a bunch of cabin rentals, kind of like you have going on here, but in the woods. They were old and outdated and falling apart. Then some of the nearby ski resorts upgraded and we had almost nothing to offer paying customers in comparison. Finley refused to let it go, even when we were up to our eyeballs in debt. Then this completely ridiculous New York City billionaire pressured her to sell and offered a boatload of cash.”

“You’re smiling. There’s definitely a story there. You told me your family runs a kids’ camp or something?”

I nod. “Yeah. The ridiculous billionaire, his name’s Oliver Nichols, and he’s a giant pain in my ass.” A giant pain that is likely even now getting ready to send in some of his henchmen to locate me. “Oliver and Finley eventually negotiated a joint-ownership agreement for the land and converted it to the camp. Finley manages the camp, and Oliver provides the funding. And he’s going to marry my other sister, Piper.”

“Wait.” She straightens in her seat. “Piper? Piper Fox? The artist? Your sister is Piper Fox?”

“Yep.”

Her mouth drops open. “Stop it. No way! I’ve seen some of her work. It’s incredible. She did an installation for the school of medicine at Ithaca. It was a miniature bronze sculpture, with two figures, and one had broken off a piece of their heart and was sticking it in the other one’s chest. It sounds weird and gross, but it was really cool. It was representative of the pieces of ourselves we give up helping others. I’ve never forgotten it. Is all your family living in New York?”

“All except Mindy. She’s on the road right now with her boyfriend, Luke Fletcher. She owns a record label, so she stays pretty busy.”

She lifts a hand up, her palm flat in a stopping motion. “Okay, hold on. I’ve heard of Luke Fletcher and Mindy Fox. You have a lot of famous sisters.”

“They are incredible. But don’t ever tell them I said so.”

She angles her legs toward me. “If your whole family is all there, why did you leave? And come to Dull, of all places?”

I don’t want to lie to her. But how can I tell her the truth? I came looking for you. I can’t tell her. Not yet. But I can give her a partial truth. “I’ve lived there my whole life. I’ve never left except for vacations. I needed to experience something new, have a change of scenery. You said you lived in Ithaca. Why did you leave to move here?”

“I moved back home after Mia got pregnant.”

I prop my elbow on the armrest, leaning closer. “That had to be hard. You said you lived in Ithaca since middle school and so you were, what, early twenties when Mia was pregnant?”

“Yeah. I had just finished college. I had planned on going into a nursing program in the fall at Cornell. I received my acceptance letter right before Ari was born and Mia died.”

“Well, fuck.”

She chuckles and points at me. “Yep. There it is again.”

“Appropriate in all kinds of fuckworthy situations.”

“So many of those in my life,” she murmurs and then pushes to her feet. “Did you want more juice?”

I stand and take a step toward her, the space between us shrinking to inches. “Thanks, but I better not. Too much sugar and I’ll be taking everyone out with me like Bruce.”

She grins. “He was a little intense.”

“You only think that because you haven’t seen me after two juice boxes.”

Her head tips back and she laughs.

Euphoria fills me. I did that, I made her laugh. I caused this smile she’s giving me, the one that reaches her eyes and fills her face with a light that can’t be explained by the flickering glow of the fire.

Our eyes lock.

My gaze dips to her mouth.

Need spears through me, a stab in the gut that shoots straight down to my cock.

Fuck, indeed.

Her smile falters, and she shifts on the uneven stones beneath our feet, stumbling. I reach out to steady her, grabbing her shoulders.

She looks up into my face. “Thank you.”

“Momma?”

We leap away from each other so quickly I almost topple over the chair behind me.

Ari stands in the open doorway, rubbing her eyes. “I’m thirsty.”

Ryan spins away, immediately moving into parent mode and heading toward Ari. “You can have one small sip of water and then back to bed.”

“But I want to stay up and watch the fire too.”

“Not tonight.”

“Why?”

“It’s been a really long day.”

“But Momma!”

“Aria Marie Green...” she says as they disappear inside the house and their voices fade into indecipherable sounds.

So. I guess Ari is short for Aria.

Fuck.