Forbidden Shadows (Lee County Wolves Book 7)

Chapter 6

Malcolm was having contradicting feelings and thoughts. On one hand, he wanted to be as far away from Clare as he could possibly get. On the other, he wanted her on his bike close to him. Their gazes met as he pulled up on his motorcycle, where she was waiting with Devon. His body tensed in anticipation of her climbing onto the back, pressing her body against his. It had been a long time since he held a woman. He’d had many women, but the difference was he had been numb to any feelings. The alcohol made sure of that.

Even though he had seen Clare a few times when he first came to Lee County, it wasn’t until now that his feelings were those of a man seeing a beautiful woman he was attracted to. Something happened, and he wasn’t sure what. Malcolm wasn’t a stupid man. He had a feeling he knew, yet he’d never really talked to anyone about what happens when you find a mate—never had a close enough male friend to do so.

“Malcolm.” Clare’s voice pulled him from his thoughts.

He blinked, bringing her back into focus. He turned his bike off so she didn’t have to yell over the engine. Glancing at Devon, who was grinning like an idiot again, Malcolm gave him a nasty glare before looking back to Clare.

“It’s late.” She said once the engine stopped. “Please just let me call an Uber. It’s not a problem at all. I don’t want to put you out.”

“You live two minutes out of town.” Devon snorted, shaking his head.

“I’m not talking to you.” Clare sighed with a roll of her eyes as she looked back at Devon. “And it’s more than two minutes.”

“Two and a half tops.” Devon continued with a chuckle.

“If it were that close, I would be walking smartass. Which I have done many times but it’s late and chilly.” Clare shot back, shaking her head, then frowned. “Don’t you have a mate you need to get back to?”

Devon gave her a wink as he walked away laughing. Malcolm wasn’t laughing as he had watched their banter closely, wondering what kind of relationship she and Devon had before he and Jamie had come to Lee County. He felt the muscle in his jaw clench at the thought.

“As I was saying.” Clare turned her attention back to him. “I don’t want to put you out any more than I already have.”

“Get on.” He nodded over his shoulder, noticing her frown at his order. “I don’t have a helmet for you, but you’ll be safe.”

“I’m not worried about my safety.” Clare snorted with a smirk. “I’ve been on plenty of motorcycles without a helmet and lived to tell about it.”

“That’s good,” Malcolm replied, a smile spread across his face, and he wondered how in the fuck she could pull on his emotions so quickly. First, he was annoyed that she had been on any motorcycle other than his, and yes, he would have to dissect that later. Now he was smiling like an idiot and didn’t know why.

“What?” Clare tilted her head, looking up at him. Even sitting on his motorcycle, he towered over her. “That I’ve been on a motorcycle?”

“No.” His smile grew as he looked away from her for a second, then back. “That you didn’t ride with an idiot and lived to tell about it.”

Clare stared at him for a long second before she burst out laughing. The sound of pure laughter from this beautiful woman did something to him, and not in a sexual way. No. It went much deeper than that. The shadows that constantly plagued the corners of his mind every single second of the day shattered into a mist disappearing. The guilt that weighed him down felt lighter. He watched her laugh; her beautiful eyes sparkled as they looked at him.

“If you only knew how many idiots I’ve known in my life,” she replied with a grin and a shake of her head. “And a few of them own motorcycles.”

Malcolm’s smile faded slightly as the shadows started to form again because he was an idiot. He had called himself that so many times he had lost count. He’d made so many mistakes in his life that there were many words Malcolm could describe himself with, and idiot was at the top of that list.

“You ready?” He asked, knowing his total attitude had changed, but that’s what happens when, for even a second, he tried to be normal. The past came roaring back, slamming him hard. What he did to his sister, actually what he didn’t do for his sister, was unforgivable, and that would live with him until his dying breath.

“Sure.” Her smile slipped as her cheeks blushed. He cursed himself for making her feel uncomfortable, but in his defense, he didn’t know how to make a female feel comfortable. He was out of practice and had been for quite some time.

“I have an extra jacket at the shop if you think you’ll need it.” He said, noticing her thin coat. The temperature had dropped significantly, but he wasn’t human, and it didn’t bother him.

“No, I’m fine.” She replied, heading toward him. “It’s not far. You go to the end of the road and turn left. At the stop sign, take a left, and my house is at the end of the road. I’m almost in Dell and Roslyn’s backyard.”

Malcolm knew exactly where her house was situated. It was their job to know where every resident lived, and it was on the outskirts when they ran the perimeter. He kept that bit of information to himself. He didn’t want to sound like a creeper, admitting he knew precisely where she lived.

Malcolm scooted up as she easily climbed on the back of his bike, indicating that she had, in fact, been on the back of a motorcycle. A sudden thought of whose bike flew to the forefront of his mind as he started the engine. He felt her shift behind him, and then her hands gently touched his sides. With a frown, he tilted his bike slightly, but not enough to cause her to fall off, but enough that she had to grab onto him. Malcolm took off, enjoying the feel of her against his back more than he wanted to admit.

He smelledlike sandalwood with a hint of a woodsy scent. She took a deep breath and then squealed when the bike tilted sideways. Gasping, she grabbed onto him hard enough to pinch him through his T-shirt. “I’m sorry,” she said as she started to remove her hands.

“You need to hold on.” His order stopped her from removing her hands.

She nodded as if he could see her, then rolled her eyes at herself as she looked forward, only to catch him staring at her in his bike mirror. Lord, his eyes and the way he looked at her at times. They were intense, with a hidden fire behind them. Embarrassingly, she admitted to herself that if he told her to strip naked and ride on the back of his bike, she would do it in a heartbeat because of those eyes. Okay, maybe she wouldn’t go quite that far; she glanced at him again in the mirror, then again, perhaps she would. It had been a long time since she had been naked in front of a man. The thought made her chuckle as he finally looked away and started down the road. She wondered briefly if his eyes had her wanting to get naked, what his hands and mouth would make her want to do.

Shaking those thoughts out of her mind, she watched the scenery pass by on their short ride. The wind was chilly, but against his back, she was blocked from most of it, and the heat from his body kept her warm. Okay, maybe it was her horny ass making her warm, but hey, a girl could fantasize, and she seemed to be doing plenty of that with this man.

They stopped as traffic buzzed by, and Clare suddenly wished she lived further away. It was very strange. She was a woman who lived alone but never really felt in danger except for a few close calls with people she had helped over the years and, well, of course, tonight with dipshit. So now, the overwhelming feeling as Malcolm pulled out onto the road heading toward her house was that she felt safe. It was odd and comforting all at the same time, and she liked it—a lot.

Clare never saw herself with a Shifter. She had known about them for many years before Hunter let his wolf out of the bag, so to speak, but she saw them as brothers more than anything. Yet, seeing the way Shifter males treated their mates and the ones they loved had her yearning for things more now than ever. She felt the man she held onto had everything to do with that yearning.

A bump rattled her out of her thoughts as she realized Malcolm had pulled into her dirt driveway. Disappointment overwhelmed her, and she knew right then she needed to get a grip on herself. She barely knew Malcolm, and yet, she felt more comfortable with this man than she did with anyone else. How strange.

The bike stopped, and the engine went silent. He got off first so she could more easily climb off the back. He gently held her arm as she did so, and her heart fluttered at that gentlemanly move.

“Thank you.” She said, surprised when her voice trembled. It had to be the cold making it do that. She looked up at him, and for a moment, she saw deep regret in his gaze with a touch of loneliness. She had heard rumors of Malcolm’s past; Roxy had mentioned a few things, but other than that, she didn’t know this man very well.

He just gave her a nod and then glanced up at her house. “I’ll wait and make sure you get inside.” He said, then looked back at her. “You should leave a light on.”

The warm, fuzzy feeling of safety enveloped her, making her sigh. “I usually do, but I was running late and must have forgotten,” she said, then laughed. “I don’t know why I just explained myself.”

A smile slipped across his face, but he didn’t say anything; he just stood there looking sexy as hell with the moonlight reflecting in those eyes, making them glow. Okay, time for her to go inside and lock the damn door. Pulling her eyes away from his, she quickly found her keys in her bag, then looked back up to see if his eyes were glowing or if it was just her overreactive imagination. Nope, they were definitely glowing mysteriously as they stared directly into hers.

“Ah, well,” She managed to spew words from her mouth. “Thank you again for everything.” Man, she sounded like a dumbass. Was thank you all she knew to speak? Then again, after someone saves you from certain death, what else could you really say? Maybe come in, have a drink, get naked, and?—.

“You’re welcome.” He interrupted her thoughts; his voice was low and deep, but he continued to stand there staring at her. She stood in awkward silence, not knowing what else to say. Shouldn’t she be shaken to her very core or did everyone who faced down a near-death experience have horny thoughts about their savior? What in the hell was happening to her? As if sensing her unease, he broke the silence. “I’m not leaving until you are inside.” He cocked his eyebrow when she continued to stare at him.

As if the words finally sunk in and made sense, she jerked. “Oh,” she said, then shook her head. “Right. Sorry.” She turned, hurrying toward her door. Climbing the steps quickly, she could feel his eyes on her. Glancing over her shoulder, their eyes met. Yep, he was watching her.

Clare fumbled her keys as if she had never unlocked a door before. Finally, the key slipped inside and turned. Hearing the blissful click of the lock, she opened the door as fast as she could and stepped inside. Closing the door behind her, she squeezed her eyes shut in embarrassment. Suddenly, they popped open as she rushed to the kitchen to turn on a light, tripping over the throw rug. She then stood there listening, holding her breath. After a few seconds, she heard the engine of Malcolm’s bike.

Glancing toward the window, she crept over like a thief in the night, slowly pulled the curtain back enough, and peeked out. He sat on the bike, his eyes scanning the area before falling back on the house. Clare’s breath caught in her throat, praying he didn’t see her, and yet, she stayed rooted to the spot, unable to take her eyes off him.

There was a slight ache in her heart as he looked away, staring into nothing. The sadness and loneliness in his expression were so apparent that she felt it. She knew that feeling more than she cared to admit. She tried to act like being single, having no one, always the bridesmaid and never the bride, didn’t bother her, but in truth, it did. She wanted that happily ever after that she had watched so many women have.

Slowly, she let the curtain go, blocking out the handsome man sitting outside her house. Turning, she slowly walked to her bedroom. The sound of the bike went past her door and then disappeared until there was only silence. Kicking off her shoes, she crawled into bed, fully clothed, pulled the covers over her head, and closed her eyes.

“You better have your shit together in the morning, girl.” She whispered to herself as she burrowed deeper into the covers. There were a few times that Clare allowed herself a pity party. Tonight was one of those times. She had almost died, and if it hadn’t been for Malcolm, she would have or at least been in very serious condition. Coming close to death made one very aware of their past and current life. A tear leaked from her eye as she realized dying alone was a fear she never knew she had until now.