Forging Chaos (Forging #3)

33. Thora

CHAPTER 33

THORA

I absolutely cannot get used to this. What is this life where I’m swept off to a luxury cabin with a man who not only makes me come but cooks me dinner and plies me with delicious wine? I wake up cocooned in crisp, soft linens that smell so fresh and clean. And I’ve got a warm, hairy arm around my waist again, with Odin breathing softly into my hair as he holds me tight.

Maybe I can appreciate it for what it is: a perfect getaway. A gift for my graduation. Although, based on the sounds he was making last night again in bed, this is as much a reward for Odin as it is for me. We used that entire bottle of lube.

My body alerts me to the need to use the bathroom, and I struggle to free myself from his iron grasp. I eye the giant tub in the mirror as I fix my hair and brush my teeth. Did we really spend an hour in there just talking about my future? I realize I didn’t ask him anything about his rehab or what comes next for him.

And then I gaze at his sleeping form and realize that was probably by design. Maybe this is an escape for him from thinking about all of that. I know his family is giving him a lot of pressure to make decisions and fill out paperwork. I heard Fern and Wyatt talking about that, and Odin has hinted at a few things.

I decide he deserves some more time to just mindlessly enjoy some pleasure, so I crawl my way back into the bed and reach in between his legs.

I find him hot and hard, and I smile, giving him a few pumps before I wrap my mouth around the tip of his cock. His eyes fly open, and he looks down at me, stunned, face-melting into utter joy as I plant kisses all along his shaft.

“Morning,” I whisper, wrapping one hand around the base of his cock while I do my best to fit him into my mouth.

“Are you serious right now? Wow.” Odin bites his lip, staring as I manage to get a few inches of his length inside my throat before I hollow out my cheeks and give a good, hard suck. “Oh, Thora. Gorgeous. Wow.”

His hand drops to my hair, reverent, as he stares at me. I release him with a wet pop as I catch my breath and then hold his gaze while I suck with all my might, bobbing my head up and down, pumping him with one hand and cradling his balls with the other.

His body goes limp as Odin leans into the sensations, but soon enough, I feel him stiffen everywhere. “Thora, honey, I’m gonna?—”

He tries to lift my head from his dick, but I send him a look. I know what I’m doing. I want to drink down the reward for this work. I want to make Odin Stag crumble to pieces because of me, and I want to be here to lick it all better at the end.

I wriggle my shoulders a bit so my nipples graze along his thighs, and that extra stimulation sends him right over the edge. Odin roars, one strong hand digging into the sheets while the other remains gentle in my hair. He spurts into my mouth, salty and hot, and I swallow down his release gladly. I want to get used to this. I cannot get used to this.

But there’s today. And there’s right now. And as I release Odin’s softening cock, I stare into his blue eyes and see this massive man has fallen apart right here in bed beside me. It’s a lot. But I chose this, and damn it, I’m going to soak it in.

“Morning,” I tell him again.

He can’t form words. He smiles lazily and pats the pillow beside him. I crawl back up and figure I’m going to rest my head next to him, maybe fall asleep some more, but he pulls me on top of him and kisses me, moaning into my mouth, pressing his lips into mine like he wants to fuse us together. “You’re incredible,” he says, tracing my chin with his finger, cupping the side of my face like I’m a treasured thing.

I can’t speak, so I rest my cheek on his chest until his breathing slows, and he falls back asleep.

I don’t remember falling back asleep, but I wake up to the smell of food cooking. I pad down the hall in Odin’s t-shirt. He notices from behind the stove where he’s folding an omelet onto a plate. “You better be naked beneath that,” he says, tugging off his robe. He is, like before, just wearing athletic shorts. I like the opportunity to stare at this perfect specimen of the human body.

Well. Perfect, plus one small, injured part.

I sigh and hop up onto a stool. I sort of like eating at the counter with him this way. It’s cozy despite the enormity of the house. “So, what’s the deal with this place again? Who owns it?”

He hops up next to me and rests his cast on another stool. “My dad and his three brothers bought it together for Uncle Tim’s 40 th birthday. Now we all share it.”

I look around the walls, covered in black and white photographs of a truly astounding number of boy children. “And you said there’s a calendar for it?”

He nods. “And I double-checked.” He squeezes my thigh and then lifts the hem of the shirt, peeking. I swat his hand away, and he laughs. “The whole family was all supposed to be at graduation this weekend.” He takes a sip of juice. “Wes, Wyatt, and me. We were all going to graduate, and now…none of us did. Life is strange that way, I guess.”

I hesitate, but since he brought it up, I decide to ask anyway. “What will you do about school?”

He nods, chewing and swallowing his eggs. He seems a little sad that his plate is empty, and I slide mine toward him. There’s no way I can eat all this food anyway. He looks wide-eyed at my offering. “You sure?” When I nod, he continues talking. “Well, I finally did talk to my advisors. I got extensions for my classes. All except argument. Thank you very much for the motivation to get an A in that one.”

I hold up my juice cup in a toast, and he clinks it against mine. “So anyway, in addition to a whole bunch more rehab, my big summer plans include geography homework and essays about sociology.”

I finish my juice and dab at my mouth, hesitating again. “And then?”

“Then I have no fucking idea.” He throws down his fork. “I can’t play. I’m not even sure I’ll be walking by fall. I’m just buying time until I figure out what the future looks like for a has-been athlete with no other marketable skills.”

“Hey, don’t say that.” He scoffs. “I mean, you are an okay cook.”

That draws a laugh out of him. I can’t help but add, “it’s nice that you can take some time, though. You know that you have support.”

He nods. “Wyatt said something the other day that sort of stuck with me…but I don’t know if it’s possible.”

My brows lift. “What? Tell me!” It’s exciting to think he might have even a kernel of an idea for his next steps.

Odin blows a raspberry. “It’s dumb. Maybe. But he said his team in London has a whole staff of mental health pros. ”

I clap my hands. “Sports psychology is a real thing for sure. You could go to grad school for that.”

He shoulders me. “She says to the college dropout.”

I shoulder him right back. “You just said you’re fixing that, though. And don’t get a big head or anything, but you’re pretty decent at research and papers. That’s most of grad school.”

He grins at me. “Was that a compliment, Janssen?”

I throw my napkin at him, and he catches it mid-air. “This is my thanks? And I went to bat for you…” He stops mid-sentence and shakes his head.

“What do you mean?” I frown as Odin slides our plates toward the sink and pivots over there on his scooter, rinsing the dishes and setting them in the dishwasher. “Odin, what do you mean you went to bat? About what?”

“I didn’t mean that. There was no bat.” He starts hand washing the pan he used to cook the eggs in, and then he seems to change his mind. “Come outside on the deck with me,” he says, starting to roll toward the sliding door. “Let’s enjoy the view.”

I can tell he’s trying to change the subject, but in the spirit of enjoying myself, I follow him. The air is crisp here. I can hear birds and insects. I close my eyes and soak in the differences from the city. I wonder if this is what the scenery will be like at Oxford. If London is a similar city to Pittsburgh, what will life be like over there?

He wraps an arm around my shoulder and squeezes. “Pretty nice, right? I wish we could swim.”

I frown at the pool. “Wouldn’t it be freezing?”

He shakes his head. “Heated.”

I roll my eyes. “I should have figured. Fancy-ass family.” I sigh and stare over the deck railing at the trees beyond the currently grassy ski slopes. But then I think more about Odin’s wealthy family and what he said at the sink. My stomach is uneasy. Something is off. I remember him showing up at the diploma ceremony, the way my advisor insisted I be there for a surprise award. A shiver rolls down my neck as I start to put it all together. “Hey, what did you mean? About going to bat.”

He shakes his head and grips the deck rail. He is hiding something. “Did you have something to do with that scholarship? Is that why you and your mom were there at the ceremony?”

Odin grips the edge of the counter. “You’re an amazing student, Thora. You deserve that money and more. You’re doing good things in the world. I felt terrible that you paid your mom’s rent so she’d come to graduation.”

I fly back from the rail, horrified. “You felt bad?”

He throws a hand in the air. “Of course, I felt bad for you!”

I press my knuckles to my temples. All this has been way too good to be true. And now I see it for what it all was. “Am I your pity project? Is that what I am to you?”

“Thora. No. Wait. You’re getting this wrong.”

I cross my arms and stare up at him. “Then tell me what’s right. Tell me you had nothing to do with that money.”

He scratches the back of his neck. “Look,” he starts, and I shriek and tug at my hair. I’m going to have to pay it back. I feel disgusting and cheap. I never wanted to be the object of anyone’s pity, let alone a man I’m sleeping with. “Thora, I don’t even know what the fuck I was going to do with that money otherwise. I can’t live up to the expectations that were set when I got it from the fucking video game people.”

I growl at him. I want to shove him in the chest but I’m adult enough not to knock him over while he’s injured. “Odin, you can’t just sneak and trick me. How am I supposed to react when I learn your entire family was talking about me? About how unfortunate I am?”

I groan and rush into the house, down the hall to the bedroom. I have to pack my stuff. I have to get out of here. Somehow. If I have to walk back to Pittsburgh, so be it. I hear him rolling down behind me. “I only gave some of the money. The rest was legitimately from lawyers all over the damn city who were impressed by you, Thora. It all went through the women’s law clinic, I swear. It’s a real award.”

"Don't patronize me," I snap. "I've spent my entire life being patronized by people who think they know what's best for me. I thought you were different."

"Thora, please," Odin pleads. "I was just trying to help. My family has so much, and you work so hard?—"

"Stop. Just stop." I hold up a hand. "I don't need you to remind me how hard my life is compared to yours. I don't need your family's pity money."

"It's not pity! God, you're so stubborn about accepting help?—"

"And you're so used to throwing money at problems that you don't understand why this hurts me!” I ball my hands into fists and shake my head. “You know what the worst part is? I actually started to believe I maybe deserved good things. That I earned them on my merit. But this whole time, you were just another person who saw me as someone to fix." I tug at my hair. “I trusted you, Odin. What a mistake.”

“Please sit so we can talk about this,” he begs, hopping over to the bed and sitting next to my bag, where I’m stuffing in clothes and toiletries. “You’re the only thing I have going for me right now, Thora.”

I shake my head and yank off his shirt, stuffing my own over my head instead. “That’s not fair, Odin. Everyone in my life depends on me utterly and fully. I thought you were someone I could maybe lean on.”

“You can! That’s why I wanted?—”

I snarl. “Don’t tell me that’s why you gave me money. Just forget it. You’ll never, ever understand where I’m coming from. I don’t have a family who will pay my rent while I figure out my shit. I don’t have anyone, Odin. I need to get out of here.”

His face falls, and he breathes quietly for a few beats. “Take the car,” he says. “My family can come get me.”

I roll my eyes. “Of course they can.” I groan and huff past him. “I’ll leave your keys with your brother or whoever I can find.”

I pause at the door, tears burning my eyes. "You know what kills me? I actually let myself believe you saw me as an equal. But I was just your charity case all along."

"Thora, that's not?—"

"Save it for the next hard-luck case you want to rescue."

I slam the door to the palace in the mountains and cry the entire drive back to the city. When I get to Odin’s apartment, I ring the bell, slap the keys into Gunnar’s palm, and stalk off down the road as he shouts my name and asks what happened. Let him call Odin and ask.