Chapter 22
Say That You Will
ELIAS
Idon’t stay and celebrate with my team after our last game of the season.
I don’t even shower before I’m grabbing all my shit and rushing home before anyone else can show up.
I have to do this before I bitch out and talk myself out of it, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that it needs to be done.
After sending Riley a text to let her know I’ll come over in a bit, I prop my phone up on my dresser and hit record.
I stare at myself in the front facing camera for a few moments, immediately noting how I look far too defeated for someone who just won a game.
My disheveled jersey from the match is stained from grass and blood, and I spot some bruising forming under my left eye from that elbow, but I don’t care.
She needs to see me like this, she needs to know I mean every word.
Starting the video is a little awkward for me, because it feels like I’m talking to myself, but as soon as I begin pacing back and forth I let the words flow out of me without holding anything back.
I tell her about every fucked up thing I’ve done since we began: the secret sex tapes, the stalking, the lies and manipulation — I even own up to the insane amount of gaslighting I’ve used to get my way, and in the end it’s hard not to fall to my knees and beg for forgiveness.
But I don’t… because her forgiveness is something I truly don’t deserve until I earn it, and if we’re ever going to even attempt to be anything real we need to start on even ground. I have a video that could ruin her reputation, and soon she’ll have a video that can ruin me entirely.
I shower in silence after that, ignoring all the text messages my teammates have sent, and how they tease me for rushing off to celebrate with my girlfriend instead of them.
Better they think that than what I truly rushed off to do, and when I knock on Riley’s dorm instead of opening it myself, I decide to do yet another selfish thing before I let everything come crashing down.
I kiss her.
She melts into my arms and pulls me inside, kicking the door shut behind her as she breathlessly breaks the kiss. “Hi,” she blushes, smiling like she’s actually happy to see me. “Congratulations, baby.”
“Thank you,” I reply, but I’m not thinking about the game while she looks like this. I can’t stop staring. “You look so good in my jersey, cupcake.”
Glancing down at it, she spins in a circle for me to see. “You think?”
“Hell yeah. Let me fuck you in it.”
I step up behind her and tug her ass back against me, slowly raising my hand and wrapping it gently around her neck. The gasp she lets out has my dick begging for more.
“Can I take the hoodie off first?”
“I’ll do it.” Slowly, I get her completely undressed, my lips finding her skin more than once as I fight to restrain myself, but if what we have here is coming to an end soon I want her burned into my memory. All of her.
When she’s in nothing but my jersey I almost don’t ask, but I’m far too desperate to bite my tongue. “Can I take a picture just for me?”
Her cheeks flush, but she nods. “I’m not very good at posing, but sure. As long as it’s just for you.”
“You look good just like that,” I say honestly, moving her less than an inch so her ass is in view as she peers over her shoulder at me. “So fucking beautiful.”
The second that blush deepens I take multiple photos that make her look so fucking innocent I want to come all over her glasses again. “Does that long mirror on the back of your door come off, or do I have to just bend you over in front of it so you can watch me fuck you?”
“It comes off, but why…?”
“Because I want us to watch.” Guiding her to the bed, I toss her on top of it and then grab the mirror. It takes a few moments to find a good position propped up against Sam’s bed, but when I do my dick is still just as hard as it was. “Don’t you want to watch?”
“I’ve always been told that watching yourself have sex is a terrible idea,” she admits. “That it never looks half as sexy as you think it does.”
“That’s bullshit. And you didn’t complain at my house when I had you watch. Tell me it wasn’t hot as hell.”
Did she… forget? Was that first time together not even memorable for someone like her? Or am I just being a touchy bitch? Probably.
Her cheeks flush a little more. “I was looking at you.”
That helps. “Yeah? And how did I look fucking you? How did it make you feel to watch me slide in and out of your body?”
“I had a lot of orgasms, if I remember correctly.” Riley grins, tucking her bottom lip between her teeth. “Fine, fine. I’ll watch.”
“Good girl. Spread those legs for me so I can see my meal before I devour it.”
She lifts my jersey up just enough to give me a peek as her knees bend and fall to the sides. “Like this?”
“Fuck yes,” I growl, gripping my cock though my sweats to calm it down. “Pinch your clit.”
As she does as told, I toss my shirt and hoodie aside then kick off my shoes. “Harder.”
Again, she obeys me, letting out a quiet, whimpered moan when her thighs twitch. “Fuck,” she whispers. “I’m so wet, baby.”
“I can see that.” Once I’m naked too I climb onto the bed and replace her fingers with mine, two of them ghosting along her dripping pussy so I can feed it to her. “Suck.”
When I place those fingers against her lips she flicks her tongue out, somehow looking like she’s never tasted herself before even though I’ve watched her do it more times than I can count.
“Lick me and then kiss me,” she whispers. “I want more.”
Leaning in, I swipe my tongue up her cunt slowly, moaning as her flavor coats it and a string of her arousal lingers as I pull away.
When I kiss her deeply it feels much less like a game, and more like a dying need to keep her here forever, but I push that thought aside and lose myself in her.
Especially when she reaches between us without breaking the kiss and guides my cock to that wet little hole.
God, I wanted to eat her pussy until the whole dorm heard her scream my name, but I’m too weak to fight this. It feels so good we both gasp, that kiss only breaking so we can stare into each other’s eyes as I sink all the way inside, and then our kiss becomes feverish.
The little growl that leaves her makes my dick throb, so I grip her chin and turn her face toward the mirror. I don’t say anything at all as I watch her watching us, I just take in the flecks in her wide eyes, the way her lips part, the way those sinful glasses sit on the bridge of her nose.
I’ll never find anyone like her again. When she’s gone, it’s over, and deep down, there’s some fucked up part of me that’s searching for another way to force her to stay.
But I won’t.
Not this time. No, this time I’ll let us both fall into a fantasy until Christmas break, and when we say our goodbyes I’ll finally stop being selfish.
I just have to hope she decides later on that I’m worth the trouble, because if she doesn’t I don’t know who I’ll become.
I’ve got to get out of my head.
My thrusts have slowed to the point that she’s noticing, making her body rock into me impatiently with the cutest little pout I’ve ever seen. I think I just edged her.
“Tell me how good we look,” I command, snapping my hips hard enough to make her whimper.
“Good,” she says quickly, then watches in the mirror as I run my hand down her thigh and wrap her leg around my ass. “Like we were made for each other.”
“Because. We. Are.” I punctuate each word with a thrust, my teeth pinching the skin of her throat before I turn my face and watch for myself.
She’s right, our bodies mold together perfectly, her small frame perfectly fitted together with mine like that last piece of a puzzle.
It’s hard not to think of those prank videos where someone tips the table over and all those pieces fall to the floor, but in this case I have no one to blame for the destruction but myself.
I’ve ruined the beautiful picture this could have been, destroyed what we both only caught a glimpse of, and this right here is all I’ll ever have of her.
So I have to make it count.
“Say my fucking name.” Even to my ears I sound angry, so before she thinks that anger is pointed at her, I continue. “Tell me how good I make you feel.”
Tell me it isn’t all bad.
Her body answers before her mouth can. I feel her tighten around me, pulsing and strangling my cock as her eyelids flutter and bliss takes over her face.
“Oh god,” she whimpers, nails digging into my back as her tits bounce under my jersey.
“So good. I love—” my heart skips a beat as she stutters — “your cock.”
I love… everything about you.
The thought is jarring, deafening, and so fucking true my hips falter. I scream those three words in my mind, drowning under the weight of them as I begin fucking her so hard I fear I’m hurting her.
But I can’t stop.
Her cries and whimpers only make me go faster, my fingers leaving tiny bruises everywhere I touch, and somehow I convince myself that she’ll be able to read my mind if I never stop.
I love you. I love you. I. Love. You.
Fuck, I’m too close.
The way she moans my name as she comes again makes me weak. There’s something different in her eyes now, I just wish it meant she was hearing me.
“I’m gonna come,” I warn, wishing I could pull myself back from the ledge, but with how gorgeously boneless my girl looks I can’t fight it. I need to feel closer to her, and there’s always time for a round two. “Your pussy is begging to be filled, baby.”
“So fill it,” she begs, wrapping her legs around me. “Give it to me, Elias.”
Goddamnit, I love you Riley Dattner.
I stumble over those words and come hard with a grunt, both of us watching in the mirror as my muscles tense right along with my throbbing cock. We look so good with our skin pressed together I never want to look away, but when I flick my eyes up in our reflection I find hers locked with mine.
She knows something just happened, it’s written all over her face. “Eli?”
Shame licks its way down my spine so deeply my forehead falls to hers, my eyes closing as words lodge themselves in my throat and nearly block my airway.
We’re at the point of no return and we both know it. There will be no public fake break-up on New Year’s, because we’ve reached the end of the tracks much sooner than we expected to.
And yet I’m still not ready to go.
Riley exhales hard, gingerly wrapping her arms around me. “Oh.”
Oh.
I nearly spiral from the word, but her embrace keeps me grounded. It feels like it could be home.
“Do you think we’ve met before? In another life?”
I’m positive I sound insane, but for some reason I need her to live in this fantasy with me even if just for a moment.
“Maybe,” she says quietly, running her fingertips along my skin. “Do you think we did it better last time?”
I nod. “I’d like to think I was a gentleman. That I courted you, spoiled you… maybe even deserved you. You think that’s possible for someone like me?”
She smiles, but it feels hollow. “Something tells me that next time, you’ll do everything right. You just have to find the girl worth being patient for.”
I already found her. I just lost her before I ever had a chance to truly have her. “I don’t think there’s a next time for me, Riley.”
I don’t want there to be.