Chapter Fifty
Melissa
He was trying to kill me.
I was going to die from anticipation. My heart would give out from the slow burn of passion. I needed him to speed things up.
“Please, Travis,” I begged.
“What do you need, Princess?”
“I need to fucking come,” I groaned.
His answer was a chuckle as he continued to lick at me like he had all the time in the world. Like there was no worry about the ice cream cone melting and he could just spend hours at his task.
“Fuck!”
I reached down and tried to slide my fingers over my clit. He was occupied further south. His tongue dipped into my entrance like he was scooping pudding from a snack pack.
The feel on my fingertip sliding over the spot that needed the attention caused me to jerk my hips, catching his attention.
The feral growl he released and the glare as he lifted his head to chastise me almost set me off.
“Get your fucking hand off my pussy.”
Oh God, why was that hot? What did it say about me that his angry demand had me oozing like a tsunami?
“Hands, Princess. If you can’t control them, I will tie them to the fucking bed.”
I yanked my hand back. Biting my lip, I thought about what he said. God, I would be at his mercy if he tied me down. He would be able to do anything to me and I couldn’t stop him.
Involuntarily, my hand slid back down. The growl that met my ears and set me on fire had me weeping. Travis locked his eyes on me and my hand went to his head. Choosing to run my fingers through his hair rather than interrupt his ministrations.
“Good girl.”
“Fuck!” I cried.
He was trying to kill me. I was about to explode. Detonate in a way I wouldn’t come back from.
A single digit slid into my entrance. My breaths came at a rapid pace. I was so close. But I needed more. Pulling on his hair that was tangled in my fist, I pushed him closer. A contradiction in movements that had my hips bucking against his face.
“More, Travis.”
He obeyed, adding a second finger. It wasn’t enough. I wanted to be filled. I wanted to be stretched. I wanted to fucking come, dammit.
“Travis, for God’s sake, make me come.”
“I’m not stopping you, Princess. Come on my tongue, baby. Let me have it.”
He rotated his fingers and rubbed along the top of my vaginal wall. The intensity of the pressure inside, combined with the constant flicking on the outside, had me arching my back against him, trying to get closer to his mouth, while also trying to pull away from the sensations that were too much.
When he sucked my clit into his mouth, it was the signal my body needed. The button had been pressed. The launch sequence was complete. Rockets lifted from the Earth, taking me with them as I screamed out his name.
“Fuck, you’re beautiful when you come.”
I heard his words. But I wasn’t listening. Couldn’t comprehend anything but the euphoric feeling of being flown to the moon. I never wanted to come down.
Travis moved up my body as I laid there, spent. His lips on mine were the perfect cool down to the orgasm that seemed to go on forever.
Then he lifted my leg to his hip. The hard tip of his erection rolled through the fluid that still seeped from my body. Lubricating the way for him to kill me again.
Because make no mistake. I was dead.
He wouldn’t need to tie me down. He could do whatever he wanted, and I didn’t have the strength, nor the desire to stop him. I wanted him to use me. I loved the way he rammed into me every time we fucked.
It was hot and hard and fast.
It was passionate and dirty.
It was detached and unemotional.
I wanted to give Travis everything, but I held a piece of me back. The piece that I lost. The piece that was taken from me when I was six years old and a man came into my room with my parent’s permission and took my innocence.
I loved Travis with everything I had. It just wasn’t enough. I wasn’t whole. I hadn’t been for a very long time.
“Stay with me, Princess,” he whispered into my ear as he painstakingly slowly entered me. He rolled his hips, taking his time to fully encase himself inside me.
Then he stopped.
“Look at me, Melissa.”
I didn’t want to. This wasn’t fucking. This was something I had never experienced. I didn’t like it. There was too much feeling. My chest was tight with the thought of what he wanted. What I didn’t have to give him.
I held my eyes closed tight. I couldn’t look at him. Didn’t want him to see the pieces that were missing. The holes that were left every time someone let me down. Walked away from me. Abandoned me.
“Open your eyes, Princess. Let me in.”
My head shook from side to side. My shame was rising to the surface. It had been knocked loose from that place deep inside, where I kept it hidden. Shown to the world when it escaped in my tirade with Danny.
I’d been lost in my anger and resentment, not giving a thought to what would be revealed.
Soft, wet lips pressed against my temple. Travis’ tongue licking away the tears I hadn’t realized were slipping from my eyes. He tried to pull back, and I clung to him.
“Please don’t leave me.” My voice a hoarse whisper.
“Never,” he said as he kissed my lips. “Open your eyes, baby. Let me love you.”
I blinked my eyes slowly. Opening them to look at the ceiling. Afraid to see something in his gaze that I couldn’t return. Something unfamiliar that terrified me.
Something he professed, but I was afraid to accept as truth.
“Look at me, Melissa. See me. The man who loves you. The man who wants to praise you. Worship you. Protect you.”
Closing my eyes for a moment, to steel up my reserve. Bolster my strength to reach out for what I wanted most in this world. To be loved. To be cherished. To be wanted.
When I finally looked into his eyes, it was there. Everything he felt, everything he claimed. Everything he offered was shining back at me.
Travis pulled back gently only to return equally unhurried. The slow push and pull of our lovemaking was a balm to my soul. He used his body to tell my heart what I refused to hear.
That even when he left, he would still be with me. And more importantly, he would always return. His careful, even thrusts spoke to my heart.
My heart broke apart into tiny pieces. And Travis was putting them back together. Filling in the spaces that had been stolen away. Replacing them with pieces from his own.
I grabbed his face in my hands and pulled him to my lips. Wanting to be connected everywhere. My kisses were desperate. Trying to convey everything I had into it so he felt even a small percentage of what he was doing to me.
Travis increased his pace. Creating the friction we both needed. Stoking the fire building, slowly becoming an inferno, that would consume us both.
“Come for me, Princess. Let it go. It’s mine now. They’re all mine,” he whispered in my ear, and a wave washed over me at his words. The release was more than a climax.
It was letting go of the pain of my childhood. Letting go of the hurt and abandonment from my family. Letting go of the resentment toward Danny and the lies he told.
It was healing.
When Travis tipped over the cliff after me, he filled me with his seed. But there was more. He filled the empty places in my heart and in my soul with pieces of him.
His love.
His devotion.
His trust.
His life.
It was the greatest night of my life. It wasn’t dirty and hurried from passion and lust. It was slow and deliberate. Filled with honor and respect.
He rolled over, pulling me with him. Settling me against his chest. His hand was on the back of my head and we both panted, trying to slow our heartbeats.
Grabbing my knee, Travis pulled my leg over his. Like he couldn’t get me close enough. Like he wanted to crawl back inside me and stay there.
“I love you, Melissa. I’ll never fucking leave you.”
Tears rolled down, pooling on his chest. I wanted so desperately to speak the words back to him, but emotion clogged my throat, keeping me from uttering any words.
I clung to him as I cried.
“I’ve got you, Princess. I’ll always be here.”
He knew just what to say. He knew the words my heart needed to heal. His love and devotion had the power to make me whole again. He gave me the strength to allow myself to let him.
The strength to surrender. To rely on someone other than myself. The strength to take a risk of trusting someone again.
“I love you, Travis. You make me feel whole. Like I can conquer anything with you beside me.”
He didn’t respond, and it amazed me how he knew I didn’t need him to. He just held me tighter. Which was exactly what I needed.
Words were important; they had meaning. But sometimes they weren’t enough. Sometimes it was the things that were said in the quiet. The actions that spoke so much louder than words ever could.
Sometimes those actions had the power to destroy. A harsh glance or a sneer. Turning your back on the people you love.
But sometimes, when you found the right person; their actions had the power to restore your faith. A hug, a kiss. A helping hand when you needed a lift up, physically and metaphorically.
A sensual night of love making to show the other person you love them when they’re too stubborn to listen to the words.
Who would have thought that a chance encounter, a hard and fast fuck in a dirty bar bathroom, would be the catalyst to finding the one person in the world I could give my life to without fear?
Who would have thought that the man I ran from, because I let my past trauma create a red flag where there wasn’t one, would be the one to help me heal that trauma?
Certainly not me.
Some people believed life was what you made it. While others believed your life was predetermined and that no matter what choices you made, fate would always step in and direct you back to where you needed to go.
I used to be one of the former. But after the last few months, I couldn’t help but question what Travis said about not having a choice. That our destination was inevitable. That fighting fate was pointless.
“You’re thinking awfully hard. Did I not fuck you enough?”
His dick twitched at my giggle and it only made me laugh more. “That was not fucking.” I looked up at him with a smile. “That was making love. Something I’ve never done before.”
“Me either,” he said. “But fuck, if it wasn’t the best goddamn time of my life.”
I wanted to talk to him. I wanted to tell him everything I was feeling. Everything I wanted for us. But when he rolled me over and kissed me, shoving his tongue in my mouth to explore, every thought disappeared. All that was left was the feeling.
Travis did that. He had that power to take everything away. Every hurt, every tear, every unpleasant thing in my life. I wanted to do the same for him. But first, I wanted to make him feel what I was feeling.
Pushing on his shoulders, he rolled to his back, and I swung my leg over, straddling his belly. His cock was hard and nestled against my ass. Of course, any thought I had of taking control was quickly dashed away when Travis growled and said, “Ride my fucking cock, Princess.”
What could I do but obey?