Give Me Butterflies (Oaks Sisters #1)

Chapter 44

Millie

Finn tugs me down the stairs and opens the doors to his study in a rush. The room welcomes me with an old-book smell that

soothes my shoulders when I inhale it. Warm golden light from a lamp bathes the room as he guides me inside. He shuts the

French doors behind us and grabs a blanket from a chest in the corner, then spreads it out in the middle of the room.

“Lie down,” he says, waving a hand over it. The thin fabric is smooth under my skin as I lie back and stare at the ceiling.

Finn clicks the lamp off, cloaking the room in darkness except for the ambient moonlight streaming through the window.

I’ve never been in this room without a lamp on, and I’ve apparently been missing out on the best feature. Because despite

the lack of light, the ceiling glows with tiny bright stars.

Goose bumps creep over my skin as I take in the view. “Beautiful,” I breathe. Finn joins me, and we lie below a sea of crisp

white stars. My gaze bounces over every detail, and I have the dizzying feeling that I’m floating through space on a magic

carpet.

Finn grounds me by looping an arm around my shoulders until my head rests on his chest.

“Did you paint them?” I ask.

“I did.” His voice cracks on the words. He takes a deep breath and sounds steadier as he says, “I spent a long time painting them after Clara died. Every night, pretty much.”

My chest is tight, barely letting me breathe as I picture Finn in here, painting stars across the ceiling while he grieved

the loss of his sister.

“It’s amazing. I feel like I’m looking through a telescope.”

He lifts his free arm and points to a group of stars to the left. “Remember what Lyra looks like?”

I nod, tracking the constellation he points to.

Of course my nerdy astronomer would paint real constellations on his ceiling.

He lowers his hand a little to another group of stars. “And there’s Delphinus.” He squeezes his arm around me, pulling me

closer to his body.

“And that”—he points to a small grouping of stars— “is the Butterfly Cluster.”

My body goes completely still, the sound of my heartbeat whooshing through my ears.

“That was Clara’s favorite part of the galaxy.”

I suck in a deep breath as my eyes ping between each star in the cluster.

Finn moves his finger in an arch. “The butterfly shape is hard to see—”

“I can see it,” I interrupt. My eyes burn, threatening to spill tears. “It’s magnificent.”

He breathes a sigh of relief and sets his free hand over mine on his chest. “Every time we went outside at night, she’d ask me to look for it. And often it wasn’t visible, but when it was, she made a wish on it. Sometimes I go to the planetarium and send the view to the Butterfly Cluster, and I sit there talking to her. I pretend she’s listening to me ramble, and occasionally I laugh at the absurdity of it.”

Finn shifts, and I turn onto my side with my head on my elbow. He does the same, facing me until we’re a mirror image of each

other. Only our outlines are visible in the dim light from outside, but I can feel his gaze warm and steady on me.

“But what if it’s not absurd at all?” he says. “I painted you here months ago. The same stars Clara wished on every chance

she got.” He tucks a lock of hair behind my ear as a tear drips from my eye and seeps into my arm. “Millie, she pointed me

right to you.”

My chest aches and my lips quiver from trying to hold back my sobs.

“I wish you could see how much you’ve done for us,” he whispers. “I’ve laid all the shattered pieces of myself in front of

you over the last few months. All the broken fragments I’ve been trying to glue back together on my own. The grief and the

pain and all my flaws and insecurities.” He cups my face in his palm. “But you weren’t afraid of it. In fact, you’ve been

helping me put it all back together in little ways since I met you.”

I scoot closer to him until my cheek rests on his biceps and my nose brushes his soft cotton shirt. His scent fills my lungs

as I breathe in to say, “You’ve done the same for me. You and the girls have healed my soul in countless ways.”

Finn squeezes his arms around me, surrounding me in his warmth and safety. “That’s because we love you.”

My heart stutters on its next beat. “You do?”

He nudges me onto my back, and our gazes collide as he leans over me. My eyes have adjusted to the lack of light enough that I can see the sparkle in his navy blues. He’s outlined by the glowing stars behind him, but his eyes shine brighter. I smooth my hands up his arms and let the hair tickle my palms as he shivers under my touch.

“Of course I love you.” He bends and touches his lips to mine. “Could you not tell when I bought you an entire shelf of books?”

A kiss to my jaw. “Or by the way I’m obsessed with basking in every one of your smiles?” Another kiss to the hollow of my

throat. “Or could you not tell by how you draw endless smiles out of me?” His lips come back to mine. “Or how I let you beat

me at Catan that one time?”

My vision goes blurry as tears gather in my eyes.

His palm settles over my chest, right above my heart. “I don’t need the sun when you’re here, stella mia . You’re the brightest star in my universe, and I’ve been orbiting around you since you poured coffee all over me. I could

spend the rest of my life watching you shine.”

His words slide over me like a second skin before they settle into my soul, completely warping my view of the future and replacing

it with a movie montage of years to come. An image of Finn and me flashes by, our hands clasped as we walk down the aisle

between rows of family and friends. Jubilant smiles cover our faces, with two flower girls following behind us. Then the picture

glitches to a bedroom—to tired eyes and messy hair as we lean together over a baby with navy blue eyes. The next image is

Avery and Eloise trying to push a stroller through the park together while Finn wraps his arm around my shoulder and kisses

my head.

A tear slips down my temple as I whisper, “I didn’t pour coffee all over you.”

Finn runs his thumb over my bottom lip. “You did. You also broke my nose and my car.”

“But you still love me,” I say through a watery laugh.

A smile tugs at his mouth as he removes his glasses, setting them next to the blanket. “They’re some of my favorite things

about you.”

My heart bursts right through my chest. Maybe she wasn’t a wanton floozy all this time. Maybe she just knew how impeccable it would feel for Finn to hold her in his palm. How safe it would be there, exactly where she was meant to land.

My voice comes out hoarse as I whisper, “I love you too.” Then he glides his lips over the corner of mine, and I seal our

mouths together in a kiss that could blind the universe.