Guarded King (Empty Kingdom #3)

Chapter 33

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

ROMAN

M y heart slams against my ribcage, the aftershocks of my orgasm still vibrating through me when I pull out of Chloe. After stripping off the condom, I tie a knot in it and drop it on top of my discarded clothes to deal with later.

Chloe is stretched out next to me, close but not touching. Her eyes are averted, her attention turned toward the window.

This should be my cue to get up and go. To start the process of stepping back. We’ve slaked our thirst for each other, and now it’s time to put it behind us.

Instead, I tug her in close and settle her so she’s half on top of me. I wasn’t exactly gentle with her. The least I can do is let her catch her breath before I leave her all alone in this big bed.

That’s what I tell myself, anyway, as I skim my fingers up and down her still-damp skin, grazing over her spine.

For a few minutes, our gradually slowing breaths are the only sounds. The near silence is oddly comfortable, encouraging my muscles to loosen. My lungs expand as if it’s the first deep breath I’ve taken in a long time.

Chloe’s slender fingers trace small circles on my chest. “It’s such an incredible view.” Her voice is soft and a little dreamy as she regards the Eiffel Tower beyond the window, still lit up against the black sky.

“The first time we came to Paris,” I say, surprising myself, “I was nine. So Cole was four, I think, and Tate was about a year old.”

Her movements stop, but only for a moment before she silently continues caressing me.

“Mom and Dad were out to some event, and after the nanny put us to bed in our hotel suite, Cole and I snuck out and sat on a balcony a little like the one out there. He asked me if the Eiffel Tower was a rocket ship.”

She smiles against my chest, the sensation making me smile too. I don’t let myself dwell too much on my childhood. I’d rather focus on the present and the future. On the things I can change.

But here in the dark, with this woman in my arms, memories send a rush of warmth through me.

“What did you tell him?”

“I said it was. And that if we could climb to the very top, it would fly us away to another planet.”

The soft breath of her laugh flutters against my skin.

“He asked if I could help him climb to the top the next day. When I said I’d think about it, he told me we could only do it if we took Tate and our nanny with us.”

“Your nanny?”

There’s a deeper question there. Why our nanny and not our parents?

“She was one of the good ones,” I say. “One who didn’t take the job with the aim of fucking our dad.”

She stiffens against me.

I clench my jaw and hold her a little tighter. “I shouldn’t have said that.” My voice comes out rough. “I have no idea how my dad manipulated them to get what he wanted. If he threatened their jobs.”

“Roman,” she breathes, pushing herself up. As she studies me, the light filtering in from outside shimmers in her moonlight hair, gilding the side of her face, and illuminating the compassion in her eyes.

Compassion I’ve done nothing to earn.

“Did your mom know?”

“He only made a token effort to hide it. She did a better job of hiding her affairs.” I keep my focus on where I’m skating my fingers over her delicate collarbone. “Apart from Tate, of course.”

“Tate?”

I’ve never talked to anyone but my brothers about this, but there’s no denying that I trust her. This moment between us wouldn’t be happening at all if I didn’t.

If we didn’t trust each other.

“He was a result of one of Mom’s affairs. In public, Dad maintained the lie that he was Tate’s father. It was more convenient than the alternative. A messy divorce wouldn’t have suited him. At home, though, was a different story. Tate grew up knowing he was different. It wasn’t easy for him.”

“He had you and Cole, though.” She says it with a certainty that makes my ribs constrict.

“Not the way he should have had.” I force out the admission. An hour ago, I wouldn’t have imagined confessing that I wasn’t there for Tate, for either of my brothers, the way I should have been. But despite the knot in my stomach, I keep going. “Dad made sure to put distance between the three of us as we got older. I think he worried that if we functioned as a unit at all, he’d lose power over us. He used our weaknesses against us. Mine was that I was the firstborn. And that I was the one most like him in appearance. The one he believed he could mold in his likeness.”

“He didn’t, though.”

I don’t respond. Because the truth is that he did until he overplayed his hand. That I loved him almost as much as I hated him until he made it impossible to love him, or even admire him, anymore. And I’ve spent well over a decade trying to unravel the real me from the man he tried to make me. Even now, I’m not sure I’ve managed it.

“Roman…” Her voice is hesitant. “I… Can I ask… Did your father ever sleep with his assistants?”

All my muscles coil tight. She thinks I’m the same as him. “Yes,” I grit out.

Before I can move, before I can put distance between us, she places her palm against my cheek. “You’re nothing like him. You didn’t manipulate me. You didn’t threaten my job. I’m here because I want to be here. Because I…” Her throat moves in a swallow. “Because you made me feel safe enough to say yes to this. And I get it. I know this will only happen this once. I won’t tell anyone, I promise.”

My heart twists. Fuck . This woman . Maybe, if things were different. If I were capable of more…

But they’re not. I’m not.

She told me what she needs, a good job, a steady paycheck, stability, safety. Those are the only things of value I can offer.

And tonight.

I can offer her tonight.

Pulling her up my body, I claim her lips. I don’t want to think about my father. Not here when I’m with her. I want to memorize her taste, imprint the feel of her against my skin, burn this moment into my synapses, so when this night is over, I can remember how it felt to have her in my arms.

Desire is an insistent pulse in my veins. I have to have more.

In one quick movement, I flip her over, eliciting a gasp from her as I cover her body with mine. “I need you to spread those beautiful legs and let me taste you again.”

She does as I ask without hesitation.

I kiss and lick my way down between her breasts and over the smooth skin of her stomach. When my mouth finds her still-slick center, a shuddery breath spills from her lips.

A groan of satisfaction escapes me, vibrating through her.

She squirms, forcing me to grip her thighs and hold her open for me as I swirl my tongue over her clit, then lower, pressing it inside her tight little entrance.

“Oh my god.” Back bowed, she tangles her hands in my hair, sending a hot surge of lust through me.

With my mouth and fingers, I build her up again. The way she gasps and whimpers has me grinding my hips against the mattress to ease my aching cock. As desperate as I am to be balls deep in her, I won’t stop until I taste her orgasm again.

She’s panting now, so close to giving me what I want. A hot, wild sensation burns behind my ribs. A sudden desire to mark her, to give her a reminder of this night.

“I’m going to come.” Her voice is strained, desperate.

Giving in to the urge, I work her clit with my thumb, and as her release takes over, the moment her channel starts to flutter against my tongue, I turn my head, my lips skimming her inner thigh, a place where only she’ll see the evidence of what we’ve done.

And as I pinch her clit to push her over the edge, I suck hard on her tender skin. Marking her, claiming her. Even if only for one night.

She cries out my name as she comes, her hips jerking. I focus back on her center, my tongue taking over from my thumb so I can bury my fingers inside her, dragging out her climax, savoring the way her needy little pussy pulses so hard around me.

By the time her orgasm recedes, she’s a quivering mess, splayed out on the bed, breathless.

I take in the mark I made, and a sensation that almost feels like possessiveness sinks its claws deep.

I clench my eyes shut, unable to stop the thought that infiltrates my mind.

Crossing this line might be the biggest mistake I’ve ever made.