5. Boone
I cleaned up the kitchen after breakfast. Juniper offered to help, but I just shook my head and told her that I had it handled. She studied me, and I could tell that she was trying to size me up, but then she just shrugged and told me that she was going to take a shower. If I didn’t want to clean everything, she’d finish what was left when she got out.
I nodded as I turned my focus to the dishes in the sink and waited for her to leave the room. Once she was gone, I felt like I could breathe.
It wasn’t that I didn’t want her around—I wanted her near me more than I should. There was just something in her that made me want to spill my guts. There was a depth to her gaze that both scared me and made me feel at home.
Maybe it was the secret she’d shared with me. I was pretty sure I was the only other human on Earth that knew her secret. It was intoxicating that she trusted me enough to let me in. I didn’t realize it until now, but I had been craving a human connection, and Juniper had given it to me.
Now she was a drug that I didn’t want to quit.
“You’re an idiot,” I whispered as I flipped the faucet on and watched the water pour over the dishes. I grabbed the dish soap and squirted a blue stream into the water. Suds appeared almost immediately.
I grabbed a dish cloth and plunged it into the water. My mind shut down as I washed each dish, rinsed it, and stacked it in the drying rack next to the sink. I didn’t stop until I felt a hand on my shoulder. I startled and whipped around, flinging suds everywhere when Juniper came into view. She was standing there, her hair damp and her eyes wide.
“Boone, it’s just me,” she whispered as if she was trying to calm me down.
I forced my nerves to settle as I rolled my shoulders and cleared the fog that had settled in my brain. “Sorry,” I said as I moved to grab the nearby dish towel to wipe my hands. “You startled me.”
Her cheeks flushed. “Sorry.” Then she motioned toward my phone, which I’d set on the counter before I started cooking breakfast. “Your phone was ringing. I thought maybe you were listening to something.” Her gaze drifted to my ears.
I grabbed my phone and stuffed it into the back pocket of my jeans. “Thanks,” I mumbled before I stepped around her and strode out of the kitchen. I didn’t want her to ask me what I’d been thinking about so hard that I didn’t hear my phone. I didn’t want to stand there under her curious gaze. I didn’t want her to get to know me.
I just wanted to hide.
I shut the bathroom door behind me. The sound of the door handle engaging echoed in the silence. I flipped the lock and then collapsed on the toilet seat, resting my elbows on my knees and dropping my head. I took in a few deep breaths as I tried to calm my body and my mind.
Not only had I slipped into a sort of trance while washing the dishes, but when Juniper touched me, my first instinct had been to react physically. Thankfully, the sight of her face as she stared up at me had been enough to pull me out of the haze that seemed to get thicker and thicker by the day. I feared what I might have done to her had I not bounced back so quickly.
I pulled my phone from my back pocket and stared at the black screen. How had I missed the sound of my phone ringing? That wasn’t like me. I shook my head, trying to settle my thoughts that were pounding in my skull. I felt broken. And I was worried I would never get fixed.
I wasn’t built for a quiet life in a small town. My childhood had been chaotic, and I had never settled down even when I was old enough to move on. My career in the military only exacerbated my need for action. There were never calm waters when you were a Navy SEAL.
To go from that to being alone with nothing to do in Harmony was eating away at me. Problem was, this black hole inside of me seemed to grow no matter how hard I tried to stop it.
I was a mess.
Unable to sit there, trying to dissect who I was and how I was going to fix my mountain of problems, I straightened and focused on my phone. I glanced down at the screen to see who had tried calling me. I didn’t have friends, and my family was all gone. Perhaps, the reason I didn’t hear my phone was because no one ever tried to call me on it.
The number wasn’t in my contacts, but the caller did leave a message. I pressed the play button and turned on the speaker phone, causing a man’s voice to fill the silent air.
“This message is for Mr. Lewis, the son of Hannah Lewis. This is Collin Baker. I am the property acquisitions manager for Proctor Realty.” I sat up a little straighter at the mention of my mother’s name. “We are interested in making an offer on your mother’s property. We believe it’s a handsome offer considering the state the house is in. We would also like to move fast, so if you could call me back at your earliest convenience, I would appreciate that.”
He ended the message with a quick thanks and a goodbye. I sat there, staring at my phone screen. My thoughts were racing. To anyone else, this was just an innocent inquiry into my intentions with my mother’s house. To me, this was a magnifying glass on my past and how I was going to handle everything that felt so broken.
I shook my head and stood, setting my phone down on the vanity and slipping off my shirt. I needed a hot shower to clear my head. Steam filled the bathroom as I waited for the water to warm. I stripped off the rest of my clothes and stepped under water hot enough to make my skin sting as it pelted me.
I rested my hands on the wall of the shower underneath the showerhead, and tipped my head forward, letting the water run down my face. I closed my eyes and took deep breaths in an effort to calm my mind. I knew I was going to have to face my mother’s house someday. I just wasn’t ready to do it today.
Fifteen minutes later, I was clean and felt a little more human. I dried off and then wrapped the towel around my waist as I stepped out of the shower and onto the plush bathmat.
I glanced around and cursed myself for showering without bringing in a change of clothes. I contemplated putting my dirty clothes back on but then glanced at the bathroom door. I doubted Juniper was still in the kitchen. From what I’d seen, she spent most of her time in her room.
And with Mr. and Mrs. Godwin gone, what would it hurt if I went out in a towel to quickly grab my clothes? I pushed my hand through my damp hair and forced my decision by unlocking the bathroom door and pulling it open.
I glanced down the hallway both ways to make sure I was alone before I stepped out and headed toward the living room, where my duffel bag was. Just as I neared the opening to the kitchen, Juniper appeared, walking straight into my bare chest.
My hands found her upper arms, but I was too late. Her soft hands sprawled across my chest. She made an adorable surprised yelp before her entire body stiffened.
It felt like an eternity before she peeked up at me, her eyes wide. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered before she took a step back, breaking my hold. Her gaze flicked down to my chest before she returned it to mine as a blush emerged on her cheeks.
My body warmed under her scrutiny. For some reason, I wanted her to like what she saw. I knew I was not in a place in my life to let someone in, and I was certain she felt the same. “Sorry,” I said, my voice low. I pushed my hand through my hair just for something to do instead of standing there like an idiot.
“No, it’s my fault. I was the one who wasn’t looking where I was going.” She pursed her lips and glanced around. “Did you have a good shower?” Her gaze once again drifted down to my bare chest before snapping back to meet my gaze.
“Yes,” I said.
“Good.”
An awkward silence fell between us. Juniper had folded her arms across her chest as she glanced around the hallway. I moved to step around her. “I’ll get dressed, and then we can head out,” I said as I made my way toward the doorway that led to the living room.
“Right. The store.” I glanced over my shoulder to see her nodding as she made her way toward her room. “I’ll get ready as well.”
Fifteen minutes later, I was dressed and leaning against the counter, sipping a mug of coffee when she walked in. She was wearing a white shirt and a pair of dark denim jeans. Her hair was pulled up into a bun, exposing her long, creamy neck.
The reaction I had to her smile when she saw me startled me into standing up straight. It’d been a long time since a woman looked at me like that, and even though I knew it was innocent, I couldn’t help but want it to mean more.
“Everything okay?” she asked as she raised her eyebrows.
I nodded and parted my lips to speak, but nothing came out. I cleared my throat and nodded again. “Yeah…yes,” I managed. My body heated with embarrassment.
She studied me, and I could see she wanted to ask me more but didn’t know how. The truth was, all I wanted to do was answer her questions, but I knew they involved my past—my mom—and there was no way I was prepared to speak those words out loud.
“It was just a telemarketer.” I managed out before I brought my mug to my lips and downed the last of my coffee. Then I walked over to the sink and turned it on. I washed the mug and set it in the drying rack next to the sink.
When I turned, I saw Juniper standing in front of the coffee machine, staring at it. Her eyebrows were drawn together, and her lips were pressed into a line.
“You okay?” I asked as I took a step near her.
She startled and whipped her gaze over to me. She held it there for a moment before she turned back to the machine. “Is coffee bad for babies?”
My body froze. “I…um…I don’t know,” I admitted.
She wrapped one arm around her stomach and rested the elbow of her other arm on her hand. She brought her hand up to her lips and began chewing on her nail. “I’m just not sure I am going to survive nine months without coffee.” Then she paused. “I’m not sure I’m going to survive these nine months in general.”
My heart squeezed at how small and fragile she appeared. The instinct washed over me to pull her into my arms and promise to protect her no matter what. Thankfully, I had enough sense to fist my hands and flex my muscles to force myself to remain rooted to my spot.
“Do you have a doctor you can ask?” I finally managed out. Grateful that my head was clear enough to actually process what she was saying.
She glanced over at me. “In Harmony? Ha.” She shook her head. “It’ll be front page news if I go.” She sighed. “The combined curse of living in a small town and being married to the royalty.” She emphasized the last word with air quotes.
“So you’re just not going to go?”
She wrapped both arms around her stomach and turned her attention back to the coffee machine. Silence fell around us as I waited for her to respond. I didn’t know a lot about pregnancy and babies, but I knew not involving a doctor could have dire consequences.
Juniper blinked a few times before she turned and smiled at me. “We should go,” she said as she dropped her arms and made her way over to the counter to grab her purse. She slipped the strap up onto her shoulder. “We don’t want to be late.”
I watched her disappear into the living room. Her refusal to answer my question echoed off the walls. I thought about pressing her to find out what her plans were. I wanted her to be safe, and not involving medical professionals in her pregnancy wasn’t a safe choice.
But I also knew that pressing her wasn’t my place. I had a sinking suspicion that one of the reasons she was so eager to get her parents out of the house was to keep some anonymity. Who was I to take that away from her?
I pushed my hand through my hair as I headed after Juniper. This was her business, not mine. If she needed to take her time before going to see a doctor, who was I to say otherwise? I wasn’t her family. And I certainly wasn’t her husband or the father of her baby.
I was…nobody.
And I was pretty sure that was who I would remain.