Heartless Legacy (Heartless Heirs of Canyon Falls #4)

44. Holden

Chapter 44

Holden

C anyon Falls University has some of the brightest Information Technology students in the country in attendance. Just like other IT and cyber security students across the country, their supervised projects include attempts to crack encryptions on top of the line programs. It’s a way for companies to check the integrity of their systems without spending millions of dollars.

I’m good with computers. Great at creating and breaking codes, but lately I feel like I don’t know what the hell I’m doing. There are days when I dig for information and nothing comes back except for a message that reads “no results found .”

It’s as if someone is actively working to prevent me from finding answers. Then there are other days where it feels like someone’s feeding me those answers. It sounds crazy to even say it, but that’s the only thing I can come up with to explain what’s happening. Today is a helpful day, because I’m staring at information that supposedly didn’t exist two days ago. Just like it didn’t exist when I was looking for Thea.

A copy of Thea’s arrest report is on file in the archives, at The Tomb. I assume someone authenticated her story, otherwise she wouldn’t be continuing as a prospect, but what I’m looking at is so much more than I expected to find.

I have the body cam footage, the dash cam footage of them arresting her and even the traffic cam footage of her trip from the flower shop to the Riverside County Jail.

What has my heart pounding is what happens once they get her inside the building and into the cell. There are cameras in the holding area, and others that point outside the cell. The cell door opens, the other inmate walks in. There’s no sound, but I don’t need any to know that Thea’s trying to diffuse the situation. Then the woman attacks and Thea defends herself while the guards stand around watching. They finally intervene when Thea gets the upper hand. I rewind the footage twice, watch them jab Thea with a needle, instead of the inmate who attacked her. Then, the video cuts off.

The next file is an audio recording. It’s clear, but the conversation is one-sided. “The rookie followed protocol and I can’t exactly complain about that without casting suspicion on the rest of the shift. We transferred her, and the paperwork’s taken care of. I expect the usual payout.”

The audio clip gives no clue as to the identity of the person talking. I have a copy of the arrest report. It shouldn’t be too hard to find out who was on shift that day. I’m sure Finn will be happy to make a personal visit to everyone on the list until we get a name.

Thea

I halt in the alcove at the end of the hallway. The door slams into my back, shoving me a few steps forward. “What are you doing here?” I ask, with a curl of my lip and a roll of my eyes, even though I already know the answer. There’s no way Holden was satisfied with how I ended our conversation the last time.

“We need to talk.”

“I have nothing to say to any of you.”

“Then listen.”

“Nope.” I duck around him, continuing towards the stairs.

“I know, Thea.” His words stop me before I reach the first step. “I know it’s impossible that you were in jail all summer, and I know that someone went to a lot of trouble to make it look like you were.”

Does he know? As in, he’s known all along and helped Malcolm ? Or does he know who helped me escape? Neither of those are things I can admit to . “You're delusional. There are police reports and court paperwork.”

“I’m thorough and observant, and you went through a lot of trouble to make it seem like you were incarcerated so the league would accept you back without penalty.”

It sounds like he still believes the rumors that were circulating around town after I went missing, and thinks I was out gallivanting across the country. “Holden, has anyone ever told you that you have a wild imagination?”

“Never, because they know I don’t say shit without proof to back it up.”

“Do you have this so-called proof now?”

“I’ve been looking for you since the day you disappeared. You were a ghost, Thea. Completely off the grid.”

“You were looking for me?” I scoff, whirling around to face him. “I’m supposed to believe that, you lying sack of shit?”

His hand snaps out, gripping my arm, his touch shutting down my tirade. My body goes rigid. “Let go.” I rasp out.

He either doesn’t hear me or isn’t listening. My chest tightens. It’s getting harder to breathe. “Le- Let. Go. ”

He releases his grip and I back away, pressing my back to the wall, a knife held between us. “If you need to say something, you say it without putting your hands on me. Now why should I believe you were looking for me?”

“You’re my girlfriend and you were missing, so I did what I always do to find you. I hunted you.”

The pounding of my pulse in my ears makes it hard to hear what he’s saying. I try to make sense of his words. “So you treated my absence like a game and were hunting me?”

“Not a game, but you weren’t here, and I wanted to find you. All my search results came up empty.” I hold the knife higher when he takes a step toward me. “Do you know how that made me feel, Thea? Knowing you were alluding me? How absolutely insane I was going without you? And now you’re back and lying to me.”

“I’m not lying. I was in jail, and you don’t give a shit about me being gone. You had companions to keep you company, so why don’t you go play your games with them?”

“Games?” He barks out a dry laugh. “This is so much more than a game, Thea. This is our life.”

He takes another step. He’s gonna grab me again. Sliding over to the right, I say, “I’m not doing this with you this time.”

“Do you think I’m giving you a choice?”

“It’s my choice to make, and what you can give me is respect. Honor my choice instead of forcing me to file a harassment report against you, or stab you.” He dips his chin and steps aside, giving me a wide berth to pass. He calls out to me when I’m halfway up the stairs. “I will find out where you went, Thea.”

My thoughts are on my run-in with Holden, which is why I stop at the first table I come to, instead of moving to the other side of The Circle, like I usually do. I hear Eloise before I see her. Her words tell me she saw me first, because there’s no way she’s so obsessed with me she that she talks about me when I’m not around.

One of her lackeys says, “My mother said, the parents are having a meeting with the Dean of Admissions. If he can’t guarantee our safety, then they’ll call for his immediate resignation.”

Eloise answers, “As they should. It’s not safe with criminals roaming the campus. If Dean Gibson isn’t interested in keeping us safe, then he needs to be fired. It’s just that simple.”

That’s rich. How am I a threat when I’m the only one on campus who keeps getting attacked? If I weren’t living this nightmare, I’d think this dialogue was a part of a bad plot to a predictable movie. They want to fire the dean because I was arrested. But they thought he did a great job not launching an investigation into students breaking into my room, destroying my shit, or drugging me and locking me in a burning coffin.

My skin itches. I can feel them looking at me. I force myself to ignore them, as I wait for LJ. They’re entitled to their thoughts and opinions, and just because they’re gossiping loudly doesn’t mean I have to respond. Especially when my response would prove they have every reason to fear me.

Stabbing Michael is what got me into this mess. I’m not about to do something stupid, like adding another attempted murder charge to my record. With all these witnesses around, I doubt Alexz could pull enough strings to get me off, and I’m not in The League of the Daggered Raven’s good graces, so they’ll probably let me rot in prison. Or ship me back to Rockridge.

I won’t be safe in either of those situations, so I literally sit on my hands to keep from doing just what I’m imagining, and fill my thoughts with happy thoughts. Those thoughts are basically images of Wolfe’s face when he smiles, when he scowls, and just does anything. His face is a work of art, his body a masterpiece, and he’s truly one of my favorite people.

The table where Eloise is sitting finally thins, leaving just her, two other girls, and a guy. I get a text message from LJ saying she’s running late with her morning errands and won’t be able to meet me for lunch. Austin and Connor are off campus with some kind of football team event, which means I’ll be eating alone.

Still in my averting conflict mode, I walk along the sidewalk instead of cutting through the grass by Eloise’s table. Unfortunately for me, she isn’t in conflict resolution mode. She and her little group step onto the sidewalk in front of me. Fuck if it isn’t taking everything in me not to reach for my blade.

“What are you staring at, psycho?” Eloise snarls.

What I’m staring at is her throat, and I’m picturing a crimson slash across it. The image of the screams, gasps, and gurgling sounds are so real that I have to blink twice and look down at my hands to make sure I didn’t actually do it.

I’m not well. I know this. I’m plastered together and functioning, but sometimes the plaster cracks and the insanity in my head slips through. Reality and fiction often bleed together like it did in that room. Which means the students and their parents have a right to be worried. Not that I’m gonna volunteer that info.

I ignore Eloise’s question, and zero in on the guy who’s stumbling over his feet to get next to her. She’s eating the attention up. Shouldn’t she be dissuading his interest, since she has a companion?

I try to remember all the rules, which admittedly I didn’t pay attention to. But I remember some bullshit about serving the dude you’re assigned to, and Pax telling me I was basically his property. I also remember he wasn’t a big fan of me hanging out with anyone who wasn’t him, Holden, or Finn. I guess that was just more of his power tripping over me, because Eloise doesn’t seem to be suffering from lack of friends or male attention.

His eyes widen when he notices me staring. Great. He probably thinks I’m about to stab him or bite his dick off. I decide to do the opposite of what I usually do, and smile at him.

He gives a startled blink, looks behind him, then looks at me again. I take advantage of his confusion. Biting my lip, I make a show of dragging my eyes down his body, then back up again, letting him know I’m totally checking him out. He smiles back and watches me walk away. I turn to make sure nobody from Eloise’s group is sneaking up on me, but he doesn’t realize that. He thinks I’m staring back. And because Eloise is glaring at me, I continue to walk backwards, throwing out a little wave at him, before facing forward again.

Mission complete. I have no interest in that guy, but I had fun dragging his attention away from Eloise for those few minutes. Maybe it’ll make him question if the shit they were saying about me is even true. Some of it is, but it would be nice if people judged me based on getting to know me and not the rumors the Zeta Nus and legacy families are spreading around campus.

Besides, I just did Eloise a favor. She shouldn’t be encouraging that guy’s attempts to get into her pants, seeing how she’s Pax’s companion .

Was it petty as fuck, flirting with someone I don’t even want? Absolutely, but it also shows restraint on my part. Wolfe would be proud.

There’s a flutter in my chest as I think about that. About making him proud. When did I become this person who cares what everybody thinks? No. Not everybody. Just certain people. Wolfe’s name just happens to occupy one of the top three slots.

Eloise calls out, “Enjoy your freedom while it lasts.”

My eyes flick back and forth, looking for threats as I make my way to The Rock. Nobody else approaches me. Nobody stops and stares, but my skin still prickles. The hair on the back of my neck stands on end.

I look over my shoulder repeatedly, but I don’t see anyone suspicious standing around. That doesn’t mean I’m safe. Picking up my pace, I rush to the dining hall and push through the doors, harder than I intend to. Eyes swing around to look at me because they still haven’t fixed the damn thing, and it bounces off the wall.

The faces are all blurry, as my panic attack ramps up. Fuck. Wasn’t I just in control, flirting with that guy? How am I losing it now, just from walking here? I don’t hear their approach through the rushing water in my ears, but I sense that someone’s near. I back away, slapping at hands I can’t see.

“Hey little cousin.”

Little cousin? Who? Me? I swivel my head towards the voice.

“Did you eat yet? I was late getting out of class and my friends already left. Mind if I sit with you?”

I try to make sense of what the person is saying, but my attention keeps drifting to my wrist. There’s a steady tapping against it. I look down and see fingers that aren’t mine pressed against it. Once. Four times. Three times. There’s a pause. Then the pattern repeats. Once. Four times. Three times. The buzzing in my ear slowly recedes and I feel my lungs expand as I finally suck in air.

My gaze drifts across the hand, along the arm and up the shoulder to the face of the person standing in front of me, blocking me from the rest of the cafeteria.

“I’m thinking I could smash a pizza, but that strawberry apple chicken salad sounds pretty good, and so does the arugula and cheese flatbread.” He smiles at me. “Maybe I’ll get all of it. I’m a growing boy, after all.”

I manage to make my tongue work. “You’re a grad student. You should be past the growing boy phase.”

“You would think right? But I’ve got a big-” I arch a brow, and shake my head, letting him know not to continue that train of thought. “Brain, and burn a lot of calories. What kind of dessert should I get?” He asks, walking towards the line.

I follow him because… well, because he helped me, and if I’m being completely honest, I don’t want to eat alone. Not after Eloise’s comment about my freedom. I’m pretty sure that’s what triggered my attack.