Chapter 17
17
“Ye shouldna be in here,” Trista repeated, her gaze narrowing. “Mah lady.”
The title came with a sneer and Gretna blew out a slow breath, knowing she would have to work hard to win the maid over. “Aye, well, I have a very good reason tae be in here.”
“Wot is that?” Trista asked, arching a brow. “Because there is nothing of yers in here.”
“Yer right, of course,” Gretna murmured, fisting her hands into her skirts and remaining calm. Even if Trista didn’t believe her, it wasn’t like she could ride after her laird or her lover and tell them what Gretna had been doing. By the time they returned, Gretna would have come up with a reason that would be plausible as to why she was in the study to begin with.
Yet, she wanted for Trista and the rest of the keep to aid her in all getting what she wanted for the future. Gretna didn’t want to be their lady of the keep and she imagined they didn’t want her there either. “I want tae leave,” she blurted out, deciding to be honest with the maid. “I donna wish tae wed James.”
Trista’s eyes widened. “I- I donna understand.”
“There was a time that I did wish tae be his wife,” Gretna rushed on before she could stop herself. “I wanted a keep like this, a husband who would one day rule over his own clan.” She swallowed. “Most importantly, I wanted a great love that would last through the generations.”
Some of Trista’s reluctance started to dim from her eyes. “And ye donna think ye have found it here.”
Gretna shook her head. “I donna think so. At least not with James.” Gretna was starting to wonder if she had found it with another, someone she hadn’t anticipated finding love with, though she didn’t know if he returned the sentiment. “I know ye are loyal tae yer laird. I am loyal tae mah brother, but I’m asking for yer help in getting mah back tae him.” It was a chance she would have to take now that Trista had found here in the study.
Trista crossed her arms over her chest. “Wot sort of help?”
Glad that at least she was listening to her, Gretna drew in a breath. “I’m looking for something, anything that I can hold over James’ head and get him tae release mah from this marriage contract.” If anyone would know something she could use, it would be the maids and servants that were in the keep. They were the ears that no one paid attention to and sometimes, words were exchanged in their presence.
Not to mention that James had invited the maids into his chamber and in his bed. “Please,” she said, hoping she could appeal to the woman’s affection for James. “I donna want tae be here.”
Trista dropped her arms and moved to the door. “Ye need tae leave.”
Gretna knew that if the woman left now, she would be at risk of facing the laird’s punishment for snooping around. Not to mention whatever James would do to her at trying to get out of their agreement. “Yer in love with him, aren’t ye?”
Trista stiffened, her eyes flashing. “Donna speak of things ye donna know anything aboot.”
“But I do,” Gretna said softly, taking a step forward. “I- I may be in love with another.” She was almost positive what she felt for Remy was love and if it wasn’t, it was going to be something wonderful when it did turn to love. He made her feel how she always wanted to feel. He made her want to be with him, to have a future and a family with him. The rest mattered not as long as he was by her side.
“And tis not James,” Trista said slowly.
Gretna shook her head. “Nay, tis not. He is blackmailing mah into this marriage.” Even if Trista refused to help her, Gretna wanted the maid to know that she wasn’t interested in James or a future at this keep. She was not her enemy.
Trista finally loosened a breath, her shoulders slumping. “When I heard ye were coming, I hated ye immediately. I knew that he was destined tae wed someone worthy of a title, but it didn’t come tae mah mind until he said ye were coming.”
“Ye donna mind that ye aren’t the only one?” Gretna asked hesitantly.
Trista gave a little shrug. “Wot? I live in a keep and share his bed more than the others. I donna mind.”
Gretna couldn’t find fault in her words. Trista was in love with James and likely any bit of affection he showed her was more than she could have hoped for. “Ye donna mind that he’s.” She couldn’t finish her own words about how evil James was being.
“He’s a Scot and a McCellan,” Trista answered, smirking. “A little evil never bothered mah.”
Gretna suppressed a shudder. “Then ye understand my predicament.”
The other woman stared at her for a moment before she slowly nodded. “Aye, I understand.”
Relief threaded through Gretna’s veins. She could make this maid her ally.
“I have a confession,” Trista said a moment later. “I was the one who told James that ye were in yer handsome Captain’s chambers.”
Gretna couldn’t even be upset with her, not any longer. While Trista’s jealousy had caused her a great deal of woe right now, Gretna knew that none of that mattered as long as it worked out for the both of them. “I forgive ye.”
Trista surprised Gretna by dipping her head. “I dinna think. He’s who ye are in love with isn’t he?”
“He is,” Gretna said softly, her cheeks burning as she admitted her feelings aloud. She was in love with Remy.
“And he’s coming back for ye?”
Gretna nodded again, her chest tightening. Remy would be back. That she was sure of.
Trista wet her lips, looking away. “If I knew something that could help ye, wot would ye do with the information? Would ye destroy the clan?”
“Nay,” Gretna said firmly. “I donna care tae destroy yer home.” She didn’t want to bring down the McCellan clan. That was not the person that she wished to be. The only thing she wished to do was to live her life as she saw fit and with the person she cared for. “I only wish tae break the marriage contract and go home. Ye will never have tae see mah again.” She was no threat to the young maid or to anyone who would finally capture James’ heart. The only thing she knew for sure was that she was not that person.
Seeing the indecision on Trista’s face, Gretna softened her expression. “I swear tae ye, no one will know that ye gave mah the information. I donna wish tae cause ye any strife with James nor do I wish for a war between our clans. I only wish tae be happy and I willna if I have tae remain here.” She knew in her heart that she could never be happy with James and he wouldn’t be either. He just couldn’t see how disappointing his life would be.
Trista stepped forward, shutting the door behind her and Gretna held her breath. “I’ve heard things,” Trista started her voice low. “I’ve been around when James and his da were speaking after some of their council meetings. They have gone into an alliance with the English.”
For a moment Gretna thought she had heard the maid wrong. “The English?” she echoed.
Trista nodded. “James was worried aboot it one evening when I, er, when we were together. He thinks his da is making a mistake, but they havena stopped their alliance. Tis has made both of them verra wealthy.”
Gretna heard the worry in Trista’s voice, knowing that if the other clans knew that the McCellan clan had the backing of the English, they would attack out of spite. An alliance with the English was a sentence of death to all of Scotland. They would be labeled as traitors.
“I’m worried,” Trista finished, true worry on her face. “The clan, they will suffer if anyone knows.”
“I willna say a word,” Gretna promised her. “Only tae James and his da so that I can get mah freedom.” While her brother or the others would love to know the information she had just gathered, Gretna was not going to betray her promise.
Trista gave a firm nod, her hand on the knob of the door. “Then I wish ye well, Gretna Wallace, and a hasty departure from this keep.”
Gretna watched as the maid departed, leaving her alone in the study once more. She couldn’t believe what the maid had just shared with her but it was what she needed. Now Gretna would have to find the right time to corner James and threaten to expose him and his da, but it had to be timed perfectly or else she would be thrown into the dungeon until James would wed her.
That evening, she was waiting in the great hall as the men started to traipse through, smiles and laughter filling the air. Her hands clenched into her skirts as James and his father came inside, their clothing smeared with blood from some unknown animal.
“Mah intended,” James remarked, pulling away from his da to greet her. “Ye are looking lovely. Did ye miss mah?”
His da joined him before Gretna could answer, clapping a hand on his son’s shoulder and giving Gretna a wink. “Ye mean did she miss mah?”
James’ expression grew clouded but it blinked away quickly. “Aye, I’m sure she did, but she’s wedding mah. Donna forget that.”
The laird chuckled, releasing his son’s shoulder. “Aye, I willna forget. Come, donna touch the pretty lass until ye have cleaned yerself. We donna want her tae think we are animals in our own right.”
James didn’t move with his da, his eyes searching Gretna’s. “I trust ye stayed out of trouble?”
“Wot could I get into?” she asked pleasantly.
His gaze narrowed, but he didn’t reply, stalking off a moment later. Gretna maintained her smile, realizing that others were glancing her way, but inside she let out a small sigh of relief. James thought he had her trapped in this marriage, but what she learned today would keep her from sacrificing the future she wanted and be forced to wed him. Silently, she begged Remy to hurry back and do exactly what he had promised.
She needed for him to come and save her.
Meanwhile, in Wallace territory
Remy tightened the strap on his bag before slinging it over his shoulder, looking around the room one final time. He felt a little like Gretna having checked his bag twice, but the ride back to McCellan land was going to be difficult and he didn’t want to leave anything behind.
Satisfied that he got all his things, Remy strode out of the room and down the hallway, where Ian lounged at the high table, the remnants of his dinner before him.
“Are ye ready?” he asked.
“As ready as I am ever going tae be,” Remy responded, giving him a swift grin. “I just hope the weather holds or it will be a wet journey home.”
Ian didn’t smile. “Are ye certain aboot wot ye told mah?”
Remy’s own smile faded and he gave a single nod. “I’ve never lied tae ye before now. Why would I lie aboot this?” When he had arrived home, he had gone straight to Ian and explained what was going on and how James was forcing Gretna to wed him. Ian, just like Remy thought, had immediately told him to go and get his sister, but the roads had been plagued for nearly a week by torrential rains that made the road back to the McCellan land unpassable. Remy had nearly gone half-crazed with the need to leave, but Ian had forbidden it, stating that James wouldn’t hurt Gretna.
Still, with each passing moment, Remy grew even more anxious to return. He worried for Gretna, for what she might be enduring in his absence and his chest clenched every time he thought of that arse making her pretend that they were getting married.
Regardless of his feelings for Gretna, he had not relayed any of them to Ian. Remy knew that once he got Gretna back to her home, he would have to walk away from her. He wasn’t worthy of being her husband. He couldn’t give her the life she wished for.
There was no need for Ian to know what had transpired between them, at least not from Remy. He hadn’t taken her innocence and she would be allowed to find her future, the one that she wished for.
Even if it killed him to watch her do so.
Ian leaned back in his chair. “Are ye certain there’s nothing more, Remy?”
Remy cleared his throat. “Nay, there is nothing more.” That would be the first and only time he would lie to his closest friend.
“Then I wish ye a safe journey,” Ian said a moment later. “And bring back mah sister.”
Remy placed his fist over his heart and saluted his laird, his closest friend before walking out of the keep, his boots splashing in the mud. His stomach churned at what Ian was entrusting him with and how he had betrayed his trust by touching Gretna.
Aye, but she invaded his thoughts, his dreams, and his feelings and Remy knew it wasn’t going to be easy to push her out of his life when the time came.
Throwing the bag over the horse’s rump, Remy strapped it down and took the reins from the stable boy, climbing on top. He would bring her home and then walk away.