Chapter 7
7
Elise
M aury taps on the glass display after he adds the freshly baked scones to their appropriate platters. “Ready to go, ladies.”
“You’re a star, Maury,” Debbie exclaims.
She’s back from table four with an order she just jotted down while I wait for the coffee to finish brewing before I make the rounds at my three tables. The diner is usually busy in the morning, especially between eight and eleven a.m. We get workers coming in from all over town for the Jamaican Blue Mountain brew and Maury’s legendary butter scones.
“Need anything from me?” I ask Debbie.
Chewing on her nicotine gum, she tucks a curl of black hair behind her pierced ear and shakes her head. “Nah, I’m good, honey. They want the egg and bacon special.”
“I’ll get right on it,” Maury says and goes back into the kitchen.
“How are you lookin’ so far?” Debbie asks me.
“All the food is served, I’m just going to make the coffee refill rounds,” I reply. “It’s winding down.”
She nods in agreement. “Yeah, today’s morning rush is over, thank God. My feet are killing me,” she says, glancing down at her Doc Martens, which she paired with thigh-high striped stockings. “Would you mind stopping by my tables with a coffee refill as well?”
“Sure,” I reply.
Looking around, I see she’s got three tables left as well, including the new arrivals. I recognize most of them by now. The lumberjacks at table two. The pharmacists at table three. And Mrs. Pennywise at table four, with her two nieces. We call her that because of the ungodly amount of makeup she puts on. Otherwise, a very nice lady.
“I just need to nibble on one of these scones before Maury gets the food ready,” Debbie says, helping herself to a piece right from the display. “My God, they smell amazing.”
“Dangerously addictive,” I agree, taking the full pot of coffee out for its rounds.
“Like crack.”
I laugh lightly as I stop by my tables first. “More coffee?” I ask.
“Thanks, yes,” one gentleman says, giving me a warm smile.
The coffee pot is half full by the time I reach Debbie’s tables. The lumberjacks are doing alright so I move on to the drugstore fellas next. Stealing a glance back at my coworker, I can’t help but giggle at how much she’s enjoying that scone. Truth be told, my mouth is watering, too. I don’t know what Maury puts in those things, but I’ll bet he could make a fortune selling them to a broader market.
“How are you doing, Elise?” Mrs. Pennywise asks once I reach her table.
“I’m still waking up, ma’am,” I chuckle as I refill her mug.
Her nieces are tweens and clearly unhappy to be up and about this early. Unfortunately for them, they’re cursed to spend their summer here in the mountains. There’s no mall to hang out at, and the local cinema hasn’t got the same appeal. They’re clearly city gals, and they’re obviously miserable.
“Would you young ladies like some hot cocoa before your food arrives?” I politely ask.
“Do you sell energy drinks?” the younger one asks.
Mrs. Pennywise gasps. “Alana, you’re not allowed to drink that kind of garbage.”
“You’re better off having a cup of joe,” I mutter.
“Excuse me?” Mrs. Pennywise gives me a stern glare.
All I can do is smile. “I can get the girls some freshly squeezed orange juice if they’d like.”
“That’s more like it.”
As I head back to the counter, I steal a glance over to the front of the diner, its massive windows and glass-paned double doors giving me a clear and full view of Roker Street—the main artery of this quaint but charming town.
For a fleeting second, I see him. A flash of his profile.
My stomach tightens as dread clutches at my throat, its claws piercing through the very fabric of my being.
I can’t move.
“Igor,” I whisper the name I wish I’d never have to utter again.
A moment later, he’s gone.
“Elise?” Debbie calls out from behind the counter with a mouthful of scone.
“Be right back,” I mumble. I set the coffee pot on the nearest table, then dash right out of the diner, my heart beating a million miles a minute.
Looking up and down Roker Street, I can’t spot him anywhere. Did I actually see him? Really? There’s no sight of him, just a handful of people heading to work. Average, everyday folks with familiar faces and tired smiles. Folks I have come to know rather well, albeit from a safe distance.
No Igor. No dark suit and charming smirk. No sharp cheeks and oversized confidence. I can’t feel the icy current that his presence used to give me. Maybe it was nothing more than an illusion after all.
I shudder even though it’s unseasonably hot at this hour, especially for a town at the base of the Rocky Mountains. Shivers dance down my spine as memories flood my mind and fill my eyes with tears. I rub my hands up and down my arms and blink it all away, refusing to cave in. I’ve come too far to go back, even an inch.
Once I’m back inside the diner, I desperately cling to my routine and service my tables.
“Are you okay?” Debbie asks as she comes over with Mrs. Pennywise’s empty breakfast plates.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I reply.
“You don’t look fine.”
“I am, I promise.” I chuckle nervously. “It’s just… I thought I saw someone.”
“Someone you know?”
“Yeah.”
She looks back at the front doors. “And?”
“It was just my imagination. It’s all good, Debbie; don’t worry about it,” I say and head to my dockworkers to clear their table.
“I’m not worried, babe. You just looked like you saw a ghost or something.”
Maybe I did. Crippling fear can elicit that reaction.
I came so far to get away from him. What are the odds he’d find me here in the middle of effing nowhere, a few states over? It’s a small town, off the beaten path. I’ve been using cash only. I have a new email address and I’m staying off social media sites. I only call my brother using burner SIM cards and I changed my phone number. I’ve been so careful.
It couldn’t have been him.
It had to be my mind playing tricks on me.
I guess it’s what happens when you’re hiding, when you’re trying to outrun something you know you might not be able to. When you become fully aware that it’s only a matter of time before it catches up with you.
Behind the diner, there’s a narrow and semi-dark alleyway where Debbie used to go for a smoke. It’s also where the diner’s loading bay is, so it’s usually blocked with supplier trucks. Today, however, it’s empty. It’s just me and the trash cans, taking a break. My mind is swirling with the worst-case scenario thoughts I usually try to avoid as I take out the burner phone I use to call my brother. I miss him.
Two rings in he picks up.
“Elise?” his voice is cautious, uneven. He’s nervous.
“Mike. Yeah, it’s me,” I say, tears already stinging my eyes.
“Are you okay?”
“For the most part, yeah. I miss you. I was thinking about you.”
“Give me a second,” he says.
“Sure, kiddo.”
I patiently wait as he pauses the conversation. I hear familiar voices in the background—Lev, Andrei—and they sound irritated. Mike shouldn’t be there. He’s barely eighteen. I pick up on a few Russian words. Reckless. Foolish. Terrible idea. Then, a door closes, and their voices become muffled.
“Okay, we can talk now,” Mike says.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m always okay,” he says, laughing lightly. “It’s you I’m worried about. It’s you we’re all worried about. Why won’t you tell me what’s going on, Elise? Where are you?”
Closing my eyes for a moment, I take a deep breath. “You know I can’t tell you that, Mike. For my safety, and for yours. Just please, as always, don’t tell anyone we’re talking.”
“I haven’t told them. Not Papa, not Andrei or Kara.”
“Igor, in particular.”
“He’s losing his mind over you,” my brother sighs. “He’s still looking for you. Papa hasn’t seen him in days.”
The way he calls Lev papa makes my stomach churn. But I can’t blame the boy for seeing him as a father figure. He was like a father to us. Still is. It’s the truth they buried at the center of the family that burns my throat and sickens me whenever I hear my brother call that man papa. I’m disgusted, but I need to keep it to myself. Mike is safer there, with them, completely ignorant of my whereabouts and my knowledge.
“Do you know where Igor is?” I ask Mike.
“I heard something about Idaho the other day, but I’m not sure. He usually comes back over the weekend, just to check in with Papa and the others,” he says. “He misses you, Elise.”
“Someday, I’ll be able to tell you everything. I promise,” I reply. “In the meantime, I beg you—”
“Yeah, I know the drill. Tell no one. I got it.”
“You sound disappointed.”
“I am! I miss you.”
The tears break free, rolling down my cheeks.
“I know you do, and I miss you, too. The day will come when we meet again, that I can promise. I don’t know when or how just yet, but it will come.”
“It’s been a long year since you disappeared, Elise. It’s almost destroyed our family and—”
“No, what destroyed our family was our parents getting shot and killed when we were both too young to fend for ourselves,” I interject. “Don’t you forget that.”
“The Konstantinovs are also our family, Elise. Come on, what the hell happened?”
“Nothing for you to concern yourself with right now,” I say. “Let’s talk about something else. How’ve you been? How’s school going?”
He groans slightly. “It’s going alright. I’m getting good grades. Papa says I’ll get into any college I want if I keep it up.”
“Good. You deserve that. What about the basketball team? You’re still co-captain, right?”
“Yeah, me and Johnny, as usual. We have a game this Friday. Wish you could be there.”
“Remember what I told you, Mike?”
A heavy sigh leaves his lips. “That if I close my eyes, you’ll be here with me. Always.”
“That’s right.” I pause for a moment. “What were Lev and Andrei arguing about?”
“Oh, you heard that?”
“Lev can be loud,” I say with a laugh.
Mike scoffs. “Yeah, he’s mad at Igor for being away so much, looking for you. It’s taking a toll on the whole family. Andrei says Kara is worried that Igor’s not going about it in the right way, that he wants to hurt you.”
“She said that?” I gasp.
“Nobody believes her,” Mike says. “That’s insane. Igor loves you, he’d never—”
“Mike,” I cut him off. “Don’t. Please, we’ve had this conversation.”
“He thinks you’re cheating on him. That you ran off with some dude. Is that true?”
I can hear anger in his voice. “No, of course not. I left because it was safer for me to get away from there, away from Igor, in particular. Mike, they’re not… he’s not who you think he is.”
“Why won’t you tell me everything?”
“Because you won’t believe me. I already tried, remember?”
Heavy silence falls between us. It’s nothing new. The sound of utter nothingness, of my younger brother being too infatuated with his older brother-in-law, the man we grew up with. Igor could do no harm in his mind. I can’t really blame Mike for choosing to believe him over me. Igor played his cards right as soon as he sniffed me out, as soon as he realized that I knew the truth. I didn’t even see it coming, the covert campaign he built against me. By the time I tried to speak up, it was too late.
“I’m glad you’re okay,” I tell my brother. “I’ll call you again sometime next week. Maybe we’ll have more than a few minutes to spare. You should go back now. I don’t want them asking questions.”
“Alright. Elise, wherever you are, please tell me—”
“I’m good. I swear. Remember, if you need me, just post—”
“Post on that Reddit thread. I know.”
“I check it every evening. Please, stay safe.”
“I am safe.”
Right. I’m the one who isn’t.
“I love you, little brother.”
“Love you, too.”
Once I hang up, I let it all out, crying my soul into my hands. A year’s worth of pain and longing unravels as I briefly wonder if I did the right thing leaving him there. He doesn’t know the truth. They’re all aware that I never told him anything. I made a point of that in the note I placed on Igor’s pillows.
It was a calculated risk, but it was for the best. Lev loves Mike deeply and Igor would never hurt him. I can’t protect Mike and myself while on the run from Igor.
It’s me that Igor wants, anyway.