Chapter 4
4
QUIN
Trust should be a four-letter word.
God knew, I’d learned my lesson growing up in the orbit of a manipulation virtuoso. Trust could be twisted and used to financially ruin the smartest men. And there was nothing harder for me to do after a lifetime with a grifter as a mother than trust.
Four-letter word, indeed.
But, stupid or not, I’d put my faith in Matt.
It was strange. Despite everything we’d been through together, I hadn’t been as upset or hurt by anything in our past—not even when Matt had essentially demanded I have sex with him for a place to stay in the beginning—as I was at the implication that Matt might not trust me now. The dangerous secret we shared meant he must trust me with his life. Right?
He’d apologized, but what was going through his head?
Matt sat across the table from me in the bar area at the Courtesan Hotel, where he’d brought me tonight as an apology. We hadn’t done many things like this, and I wasn’t entirely certain what he thought he was doing... but it was working. A little.
I toyed with my lavender martini, sliding it around the tabletop that separated me from Matt. The garnish was a stem of lavender stretched across a strawberry crusted in sugar. The pretty arrangement was pinned together by a diamond-tipped metal skewer.
“This is nice,” I said, hating that my words were stilted.
Matt grunted and glanced down at his beer. We weren’t necessarily great at talking stuff out. So far things had just sort of worked, which made us lucky, but this probably wouldn’t get better without a real conversation.
Half of healing anyone was listening to their issues. Active listening was a large part of what we’d been taught about patient care in my nursing classes. I glanced up at him, and he was watching me out of the corner of his eye. He straightened and cleared his throat, which had me giggling.
“What?” he asked with a frown.
Sighing, I sipped my drink and bumped his ankle under the table with my foot. “I love you. You really hurt my feelings.”
His mouth tensed into a firm line, and then he grabbed my hand, dragging it across the table. His lips were warm as they danced over my knuckles. “I’m sorry.”
Tipping my chin toward him, I hummed. “How sorry?”
He nipped my knuckles lightly, and a shiver of delight sizzled down my spine. My cock twitched and firmed where it was trapped in my panties as he swirled his tongue around my engagement ring. And what a ring.
Why do you have to be such a pretty ring? All those diamonds around the band. How much are you worth, anyway? Probably more than my Porsche. Hell. I glared at the glittering gems. The three-carat centerpiece diamond had been cut in the shape of a heart. Matt clearly picked the jewelry out with me in mind, meaning he did love me, even if he was an idiot. Some of my anger ebbed—but not all of it.
“What do you want?” he asked.
I grabbed my drink and downed half of it, the sweet floral flavor lighting up my taste buds while he held my other hand. “I don’t want you to accuse me of things I haven’t done ever again. I don’t care what you need to do to get over the past. I can’t be held responsible for someone else’s actions. And I won’t.” I settled the glass on the table and pulled the strawberry from the skewer, munching the sweet fruit while I studied him.
He stared, transfixed, at my lips, and I smiled.
Matt’s gaze darted up to meet mine. “Do you understand why?—”
“I didn’t say I didn’t get it, I said I won’t pay for someone else’s crimes.”
We were quiet for a bit while he held my hand. People around us talked and laughed. He teased his thumb over my palm, and a slow burn of arousal smoldered in my belly. There was a string quartet on the stage at the far end of the room playing a quiet melody that was familiar, though I couldn’t quite place it. I tucked the piece of lavender from my drink behind my ear, and Matt sighed, a long, loud, bone-weary sound that made me feel bad for him.
“You’re right.” His sincere brown eyes begged me to let this go and never mention it again, but I wasn’t so sure that was a good idea. We needed to discuss this.
I sat up straighter as what he’d said registered. “I am?”
“Yes.” He dragged his phone out of his pocket and smirked, then tucked it away. “Let’s go.”
“Oh,” I said, surprised as he abruptly stood, then came around and pulled out my chair with me on it. I had no choice except to take his hand and let him draw me up against his side. I snagged my small red purse. “What’s going on?” I ran my fingertips along the soft fabric of his dress shirt before plucking at one of the buttons.
“Our room is ready.”
“Room?” I asked, frowning at him.
He smirked and led me out into the stunning lobby. I’d been boggled by the luxury when we’d arrived, but I was struck all over again by the beauty of this historic building. The Courtesan Hotel was a work of art.
We walked across the gleaming gold-swirled white marble floor to the classic wooden front desk where an irritated-looking blond man was working. I took the time to stare at the cut-crystal chandeliers glittering between pillars that jutted up here and there around the room. I’d traveled throughout Europe with my mother, and this was just as stunning as anything I’d seen there; although, there was something about the place that felt American.
“Mr. Coltrane,” the blond man said, speaking before we’d made it to the desk. His piercing blue eyes were cold, and he was clearly on the alert for anything coming his way. The man handed Matt a set of key cards. “Everything is arranged as you asked. Please enjoy your stay. Do you need an escort to your room? You’re in number fifteen.” His tone was a bit icy, but he probably had a difficult job.
“No.” Matt smiled. “I know where it is. I would also prefer not to be disturbed until at least noon tomorrow. Is that possible?”
The blond man nodded. “Of course. Have a good night.” The phone on the desk rang and he answered. “Hello, Courtesan Hotel. We have everything to meet your unique needs.”
Matt snickered, and I frowned at him as he led me to the right of the beautiful central staircase that swept upward to the second floor and down an arched hallway. Gold tiles overhead came to a point and had me staring. We reached a door, and when he opened it, I gasped as I was ushered inside the massive room. It resembled a small apartment rather than a standard hotel.
The décor was outrageous, something out of a movie. A round bed big enough to fit five people took up the center of the room, and the purple-and-silver color scheme made everything feel absolutely lush. There was a silver-topped bar on the left, I guess in case we were too lazy to go to the main one. The giant rectangular windows looked out over the grounds shrouded in darkness. A sturdy desk that somehow made me feel nostalgic was in the corner across the room.
Was this made for royalty? How much money did Matt waste? Ugh, why does he make it so hard for me to stay angry? I need to make him talk. I have to make him talk about this. We should have a real, adult conversation. But everything is so pretty. My breath caught.
“What is this?” I spun in a small circle, taking it all in.
“Part of my apology,” he said, smirking down at me.
“Well, we should fight more often.”
He snorted as he urged me farther into the room and closed the door behind me. I skipped to the oversized bed—bigger than a king—and tugged at a large package that was sitting there. The red box with a white ribbon made my fingers itch to flip the lid off.
“What’s this? More apologies?”
He shrugged and stuffed his hands into his suit pockets. “I have no idea how to do this, you know. I’m used to things either just being done or being screamed at.”
I stared at him, and he gazed right back.
My heart hurt and I went over and hugged him. I gasped as he drew me close and nearly crushed me in his strong grip. “I’m sorry I left instead of talking, but you were being awful. I don’t want to be all messed up any time we have a problem. I’ve seen enough bad relationships explode to last me ten lifetimes.”
He nodded, and we stayed there for a long while locked in an embrace so tight I had difficulty breathing. I backed off as soon as Matt relaxed, clearing my throat, and he walked over to gesture at the package on the bed.
Excitement danced through me and I let my feet do the same thing as I hurried over to my present. Laughing, I lifted the lid on the box and hummed at what was inside, then glanced at him from the corner of my eye before pulling out a pair of red leather cuffs dotted with silver hearts.
I raised my eyebrows. “These seem like they’re too big for me.”
He shrugged and flashed me his teeth in a dangerous smile. “I thought maybe as part of my apology, you could do whatever you wanted with my cock tonight. Have me all to yourself.”
I slid my wrist through the leather and let it dangle, and he growled, a sound that had my breath catching. I held in a laugh. He might’ve gotten the cuffs for him to wear, but with the way he was looking at me, he’d also bought them because he’d had other ideas he’d been holding back on. I worked the leather out of the buckle and tightened the cuff on my wrist. The squeeze was firm, definitely pleasant. It reminded me of his hands holding me down while he thrust inside my body.
“Maybe you’re the wolf who finally caught your prey,” I said, sounding far more confident than I felt.
Our role playing was something I was enjoying more and more. My stomach fluttered as the weight of the cuff tugged on my wrist. I lifted my dress over my head and threaded the cuff through it, and he moaned as my red lacy underwear came into view, along with the bralette I’d found. I’d meant to surprise him tonight—and judging by the expression on his face, my careful shopping had been a success. I spun in a circle so he could get a good look at where the lace showed off my asscheeks.
Things felt as if they were sliding back into place after the fight, and I hummed when he lunged toward me and kissed me, attacking like I was the last drop of water in a desert.
And boy, was he thirsty.
“Baby Girl,” he growled, sliding his hands down my waist, then around to cup my asscheeks. I sighed into the kiss, and he tugged me firmly against his front and lifted so that my cock brushed his hard-on where it was hidden in his suit pants. He devoured me for a few excruciating minutes. I squirmed as my cock hardened to the point that all I could think about was getting some relief. His wood nudged me, and I pressed back as much as I could, which finally caused him to nip my bottom lip and dump me on the bed.
“This is so fucking sexy,” he said, tugging on the bralette. And then, he pulled it down so he could see my nipples. I was used to Matt feasting on me like he thought he was never going to see me again, but I wasn’t prepared for the way he cupped my pec and sucked hard, drawing on the entire nipple and the skin around it. I panted and yelled, scrabbling at his thick bicep with my hands.
The suction almost hurt, and when he popped off, it was clear he was leaving a love bite along with making my cockhead throb so much I couldn’t stay still.
“Matt,” I said, but he didn’t stop, only went to the other side to do the same thing while he toyed with the tip of the nipple he’d already attacked. I got lost in a haze where time meant nothing. He’d never spent so much effort on my chest, and when he was done, I felt as if I might be able to come from the way he was flicking his tongue back and forth, teasing.
And then, he took me by surprise when he slid his hands under my arms and scooted me toward the center of the massive bed. There was something on the wall that I’d thought was a decorative flower, but after the smallest amount of fiddling, I realized it was a hook, and he had the metal chain of the cuffs secured to it before he slipped the free one onto my other wrist. I felt dazed as he tightened the leather, and I pulled, arching my body, struggling just a little.
Matt was fucking sexy on his knees above me with his massive cock punching against the front of his suit pants and his chest heaving. His pupils were huge and dark, which made him look even more dangerous. Out of control.
I moaned.
“You’re captured,” he said, opening his belt. I sucked in a deep breath, and he tugged out his cock. I’d been with guys who were technically bigger—or at least, longer—but his six-inch cock was thick and hit my P-spot just right every time. The worst part? The jerk knew it. He stared at me with an evil smile that had my toes curling. “Get ready, Baby Girl, because I’m gonna destroy that pussy.”