Hot Damn (Hot as Puck #3)

24. Beckett

Beckett

I ’ve always liked silence. My own company. Whether that’s because it’s what I grew up with and was used to or my nature, I don’t know.

But the silence that has hung in the air in my house the last few hours has been deafening.

The two females sharing the space have been uncharacteristically quiet. We’ve prepared dinner. Eaten dinner. Cleaned up after dinner.

Even those were done in silence.

I’m a little shocked. I’ve heard about teenagers giving their parents the silent treatment but I’ve never been subjected to it.

Until today.

It makes me wonder what’s going on with Whit. I sensed something earlier, even asked Cami if she noticed but after Whit told me about her suspicions of being followed, I thought that was it.

Realizing she’s seen the man who attacked her and Cami yesterday multiple times in recent weeks must be playing on her mind. It has to be scary. It sure as hell is for me because he could have cornered Whit at any one of those times and no one would have been there to help her .

And I all but yelled at her for not telling me.

I don’t know if I should apologize or let her work her way out of her feelings on her own.

Except I can’t stand that she won’t even look at me. Can’t stand getting the cold shoulder.

And it’s not only Whit I’m getting it from.

Although at least Cami will look at me, even if it’s only to shoot me dirty looks I can’t decipher.

Whit didn’t even say goodnight when she headed upstairs to bed.

At least I think she’s gone to bed. Hard to tell when she’s managed to move around the house without a sound while awake.

Honestly, it’s a skill I didn’t know she possessed. Her silent movements and cold shoulder would be admirable if I wasn’t on the receiving end of them.

With a sigh, I turn to Cami. “I get that you’re mad at me, that Whit is mad at me, but I can’t stand this quiet. Talk to me. Tell me what you think I did wrong?”

“What I think you did wrong?” The look on her face tells me I’ve fucked up again.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.” Scrubbing a hand over my face I suck in a deep breath and blow it out. “I don’t like fighting with Whit and this doesn’t really feel like a fight. Well, not our usual kind anyway.”

Cami remains tight lipped.

“And I hate being at odds with you too.”

“Isn’t that how we started? At odds? There’s nothing new happening between us.”

Her words bring me up short.

Yes, I didn’t like her to begin with, but it wasn’t personal, not really, and since then I’ve found myself somehow tethered to this woman I barely know. She’s still pretty much a stranger and yet I told her my deepest darkest secret.

“What you need to do is worry about patching things up with Whitney.” Cami’s shoulders hunch as she wraps her arms around her waist. “I hate conflict. I lived it every day for the first eight years of my life. I avoid it at all costs now.”

My gaze is glued to her and I hold my breath, wait for her to say more.

“I think you need to apologize to Whitney. I think you both overreacted to the situation. Maybe it was because of yesterday. Fear and concern can make things seem worse than they are. Maybe it’s because I’m here, in your space. Whatever it is, she didn’t do anything wrong, didn’t lie, and didn’t really keep anything from you.”

As soon as she says those last words I know what ticked her off earlier. “But I’m keeping something from her.”

“Yes.”

“Fuck!” I’m a dick. I’m moving before I think. “I’ll be back. I need to talk to Whit.”

Taking the stairs two at a time I’m in front of my daughter’s closed bedroom door before I stop dead in my tracks and stare at the barrier Whit has put between us.

It’s rare for Whit to close her bedroom door. I don’t think there’s more than a dozen times I’ve seen it. When she was little, she liked me to leave the light on in the hallway and her door cracked a couple of inches.

She’s never slammed it in a fit of rage because she doesn’t have a temper like that. And the only reason I know slamming doors are a teenage girl thing is from TV.

From everything I know, Whit has never been the average teenager.

Faced with a shut door I’m unsure how to proceed. Normally I’d rap my knuckles on the doorframe and poke my head inside. But this? This requires a knock and patience.

I have to tap my knuckles on the wood and wait to see if I’m allowed in.

What if she’s locked it?

Dropping my gaze to the door handle, I stare at it.

Does it even have a lock ?

Sound behind me has me turning to find Cami coming up the stairs, her movements stiff and slow. I’m torn between going to help her and knocking on the door in front of me.

“Don’t use me as an excuse to chicken out.”

Cami’s quiet voice makes me jolt. I wasn’t prepared for her to speak. I definitely wasn’t prepared to be called out.

With a deep breath, and a stretch of my neck, I turn back to Whit’s door and knock.

It takes so long for a response that Cami has time to disappear into my room and I’m on the verge of knocking again. But then the door swings open and Whit stands before me, her face devoid of emotion.

I can’t remember ever seeing my daughter with a blank face. She’s usually animated; even sick, she’s gushing with emotion. This straight-faced girl has me taking a step back.

“Um, hey, can I come in?”

Her gaze moves behind me but I don’t turn to see what she’s looking at. I keep my eyes locked on Whit’s face in hope of seeing something other than this unemotional version of her.

When her gaze lands on me again, she stares for so long my muscles spasm with the urge to move. With half an eye roll and a gust of air, she says, “Sure. Come in.”

Turning, she walks to her bed and climbs on, slipping under the covers in spite of still being in her clothes.

“Can we talk?” I pull the chair from her desk over beside the bed and take a seat. When she doesn’t answer me but continues to look at me with those emotionless eyes I had no idea she’d mastered, I blow out a breath and lean forward, my forearms on my thighs, hands loose even though I want to clench them. “I’m sorry.”

My words don’t get me so much as a twitch.

“I wasn’t angry at you. I was angry at the situation and my lack of control over it. Before, when it was just us and the world didn’t know about you, I didn’t have to worry about this kind of thing. We both flew under the radar and I liked that. I had control of that.”

Swallowing, I keep my eyes on hers and hope she can see, as well as hear, the truth of what I’m saying.

“I love you more than anything in this world, Whitbee, and if anything happened to you. If someone hurt you because of me…” I hang my head for a second before meeting her gaze, my eyes wet with the emotion the thoughts in my head evoke. “It would destroy me.”

She’s quiet, but I can see she’s thinking about what I’ve said. And that’s all I can ask. As long as she hears me, as long as I’m truthful with my own thoughts and feelings, she has to understand that all I want is for her to be safe.

“I didn’t keep it from you on purpose and I thought the detectives would tell you anyway.”

“They didn’t.”

“I get that. Now.”

“I’m sorry I accused you of hiding it from me.”

“It’s okay. I know things are emotional right now. With Cami getting hurt trying to protect me…” she tips her head to the side. “Why did she do that? She doesn’t really know me.”

“Because that’s the type of person she is. If it had been someone other than you, she’d have stepped in to help.”

“I guess, but you should have seen the look on her face, Dad. And when she threw her laptop at him.” A small smile tips up the sides of her mouth. “She threw it like a frisbee. It skimmed his head because he was already turning to run away but it was the coolest thing to see it fly past him.”

An answering smirk curls my lips as a vision of what she describes pops into my head. “I bet.”

“Do you think we could see if the school security system recorded it?”

My smile widens. “I think you might need to ask someone else about that. Maybe Natalie.”

“Can I? ”

“I don’t see why not. I wouldn’t mind watching Cami fighting back. Although I’m not sure I want to see him grab you. Maybe we can get them to give us from the point after that?”

“He didn’t hurt me. I saw him move before he touched me so I was already twisting away like I learned in those self-defense lessons you made me take.”

“I didn’t make you take those, you asked to go!”

She grins and the vise encircling my chest loosens. “I know.”

“Are we good? Do I need to say sorry again?”

“We’re good.”

“No extra sorry necessary?”

“No. And I’m sorry for not making sure I told you earlier.”

“We both could have handled things differently and we will in the future. Or at least try.” It’s a promise I make to her and me.

“Can I ask you something?”

“You can ask me anything.”

“Is Cami your girlfriend?”

“What? No.” I jackknife upright. “What gave you that idea?”

“Well, you kind of freaked out about her being hurt yesterday and then you brought her home to take care of her…” She shrugs and I have to admit, her observations are spot on. Which makes her question legitimate.

“Huh. I did do all that, didn’t I?”

“Yes. And she’s still here.” Her hand comes up when I open my mouth. “I’m not complaining. I like her. I like spending time with her.”

“Well, that’s good, because you’re spending the next few days together.”

“What? Why? I thought I was coming to the game!” She’s up on her knees, leaning toward me. “I want to be at the game. I don’t want to stay?—”

“Whoa. Hold on.” I’ve got both hands up to stop her words. “You are coming to the game. That hasn’t changed. I only meant that I’d like to ask you to stick close to Cami when I’m not with you. ”

“Oh.” She lowers to her heels and smiles. “I can do that. Do you think she’ll let me help her take video to use in her interviews?”

“You can ask.”

“I was talking to the videographer she brought to the barbecue the other week and I think I want to do something in the media. Not be a reporter or anything like that, but film making.”

The concern wrinkling her brow has me sitting straight. “You can do whatever you want to. But I thought you wanted to do a business degree.”

We talked a bit about what she wanted but her recent comments about sticking close to me, possibly doing college online, have me wondering if she’s had a complete change of mind.

“You talked about going to school in New York at one point,” I remind her.

Nodding, she smiles. “I did. But the closer the time comes, the less I want to do that, and I haven’t applied to any colleges, Dad.”

“What? I thought we’d filled out a bunch of applications before we moved here.”

“We did.” She tips her head toward her desk. “They’re in the top drawer.”

I glance over my shoulder. “You don’t want to send them in?”

“No.” The firmness of her voice has me turning back to look at her. “I want time off. I want to take a year to think about what I want.”

“But—”

“I won’t be doing nothing. I’m thinking of asking Natalie if she’ll let me be an unpaid, or low-paid, intern at the Rogues. I want to learn everything about the team from how the arena is run to coaching the players to managing the franchise.”

“Really?” She’s never shown much interest in hockey other than it’s what I do for a job. Her deeper interest now seems odd to me .

“Yes. It’s been fun watching these last few weeks and I’ve seen a bit of what happens behind the scenes since hanging out with the twins because Natalie is around them a lot. Plus I did some research on how KAW got the franchise. All the bad press they got for getting it. It’s fascinating.”

“Okay, well, if it’s what you want, go for it. You know I’ll support you any way I can.”

“So you’re okay with me not going away to college?”

I smile at the way she braces for my answer. “I’m fine with that if you have a plan. You know I didn’t go to college. I barely scraped through high school.”

“But you had a skill, one you could turn into a career. There’s nothing wrong with not having a degree, Dad.”

“I know. I just want you to have everything you want and every opportunity I didn’t.”

“You give me that. And I’ve learned something during these last few months, particularly in recent weeks.”

“Oh, what’s that?”

“ We’re the most important thing we can ever have. Our family, the Rogues family.”

“How did you get so wise?”

It seems we’ve discovered the same thing at the same time because her words are true. All the money in the world can’t compare to the support of family.

“I had a very wise man raise me.”

When she launches herself at me, I wrap my arms around her and pull her close.

The love that flows through my veins for this kid always surprises me. She’s everything to me and tonight has shown me that she’s no longer a kid.

She’s a young woman.

A young woman I’m proud of.

A young woman I’m proud to have had a hand in raising.

A young woman who deserves the truth.