EPILOGUE II

(Six Months Later)

I’m still not used to any of this, Sir. I know you said it would take some time, but six months should be enough, right? I guess not, but it’s fine. One of these days I’ll be used to my hair being this short. I’ll get used to wearing clothes that look like I was made to be a hunter, fucking earth tones draped all over me. I’ll get used to the old manager named Larry working in the office behind me. I’ll get used to hearing customers bicker back and forth as they stand in front of the fishing poles while I watch them silently behind the counter, wearing a name tag that reads Shawna. I’ll grow used to the fact that I went from being a detective to a cashier at Willie’s Bait Tackle in Seward, Alaska. I’ll come to love it all one day, but it’s going to take a miracle for me to get used to the constant smell of fish in this building. For that, I ask for your patience.

Seward is a port town dropped on the edge of the most gorgeous piece of land the world has to offer. It’s stunning here, surrounded by water and lush green forest everywhere. The perfect place for two wanted criminals from the east coast to hide out for the rest of their lives. It has been six months now, but the night we arrived here feels like just yesterday—the night we killed two cops and evaded all the rest. They still want us in Philly. Desperately. You don”t kill an Internal Affairs detective and a precinct captain without every officer in the area foaming at the mouth, wishing on every star that they could be the one to fill you with hot metal. They’ll have to keep wishing, because we are long gone. The smell of fish is worth it.

In the weeks following our submersion into this new life, I continued to check in on the happenings at home. To no one’s surprise, Detective Summers’ and Captain Saunders’ deaths were attributed to us before we even boarded the ferry in Washington. The following month, I found a report saying that the Andrea’s Diner fire still hadn”t led to any charges and was basically going cold in a hurry. Chad Swanson was never charged, and they never learned that it was me. Captain Saunders’ wife and kids looked miserable at his funeral, but I’ve never been the one to be moved by sad faces. Even now, in my peaceful life up north, I’m unbothered by their tears. Saunders wasn’t a bad guy, but he got in our way … and he shot you. Some lines are never allowed to be crossed.

Over time, our names began to fade away. The Seventh Precinct went from press conferences about us, to articles on the front page, to seventh page stories in online-only magazines. I doubt that they’ve given up, but the truth that the public doesn”t know is that people get away with murder all the time. Killers vanish into the night on a regular basis. We’ve simply added our names to the list of people who managed to get away with our crimes. Journey and Evan are no more, and will never return.

“I just don”t know if I want the red one or not,” one of the two men says, arguing with his partner about which fishing pole to buy. The way the two of them try to keep their voices down makes me smirk.

“For the love of god, Kaspian. Just pick one,” the other man says.

“Fine. You’re lucky I love you, Quin,” the man replies, still looking between the two poles.

His partner rolls his eyes. “You pay and I’ll wait outside.”

Quin storms off, shooting a quick glare my way before pushing through the exit with a huff. Once he”s gone, his friend approaches the counter with two rods in hand and a smile on his face.

“Find everything you need?” I ask, forcing the smile that I still haven”t mastered.

“Yes, thank you.”

I ring up the rods and tell the man I know as Kaspian the price, and he swipes his card without small talk.

“Thanks so much for shopping at Willie’s,” I say before handing him his new fishing gear. “Would you like to fill out an informational card for a chance to win a free trip to Las Vegas?”

“No thanks,” Kaspian replies.

“Are you sure?” I ask, as I am required to do by the owner. “It includes hotel accommodations just a block away from the Luxor hotel.”

Kaspian takes his rods but hesitates with a look of interest on his face. “Really?” I nod, still forcing the smile. “Well, in that case, maybe a little vacation would do us some good.”

To my surprise, he takes the card and begins to fill it out, jotting down his name, address, and phone before handing it back to me. When I look at the name, I frown.

“Your name’s Grayson?”

“Yeah,” he answers with a polite nod.

“Oh. When you were by the fishing poles with your friend I thought I heard him call you Kaspian.”

The man’s eyes suddenly shift. His glare is menacing and I recognize something in it. It’s like a mask has slipped just enough to show vibrant colors beneath the dull coat of gray he paints on every morning.

“No,” he says, staring without blinking. “It’s Grayson.”

I quickly go from being caught off guard to being intrigued, and I smile.

“Okay,” I say with a smirk. “Don’t worry. My name isn’t Shawna either.”

Graysongawks at me for a moment longer, his eyes bouncing from my name tag back up to my face. He tilts his head as the gears in his brain go to work, before slipping his mask back on and smiling.

“Have a nice day,” he says.

“You, too. Thanks for shopping at Willie’s.”

Just as Grayson exits, a blonde woman walks in wearing a yellow top with blue jeans. She smiles at me as she enters and I return the favor the best I can. I truly hope that you”re having an easier time smiling than I am, Sir. My fucking face is starting to hurt.

“Just this, please,” the blonde says as she places a large case of bait on the counter. Her blue eyes glimmer as she maintains eye contact and beams at me.

“Great,” I say, grabbing the bait to ring it up. “Would you like to fill out an informational card for a chance to win a free trip to Las Vegas? It includes hotel accommodations for two just walking distance from the Luxor.”

“Wow. Okay, sure,” the woman says. She jovially jots down her information and hands me the card just as the door opens again.

My heart vibrates with excitement when I look over and see you strut into the shop. You”re dressed in your work clothes—a black and red flannel with dirty jeans—and you look incredible. Your beard is thicker than ever, and the muscle you’ve put on since we moved here makes you a brawny specimen totally worth gawking at. I’m so fucking lucky to call you mine.

As you walk in, the blonde walks out, and I smile as you hold the door open for her. She thanks you as she starts to squeeze past you, and I watch her blue eyes drink you in. She looks you up and down before speaking again.

“Thank you so much,” she says in a voice much higher pitched than the one she used to speak to me. She keeps her eyes fixed on you, and I see the hope in her gaze. She wants you to notice her the way she has noticed you, but you don”t. Your eyes find me and never leave. Your smile is only for me, and you let go of the door before she can even exit completely.

“Hey, Little One,” you say as you approach me.

The blonde’s eyes fall to the floor before she steps out and lets the door close behind her, and I come from around the counter to wrap my arms around your neck. You lift me up and spin me around like we haven”t seen each other in years. Then we kiss, ignoring the fact that Larry is watching us from the office with a grin on his wrinkled face. I ignore the entire world for you, my savior.

“Did you miss me?” you ask when we pull away.

“Always … Justin,” I answer, mocking your new name.

“I missed you, too, Shawna. How’s everything going today?” you ask as you look through the open manager’s door and wave to the old man sitting at the desk.

I shrug. “It’s fine. The usual, I guess. How is the house coming along?”

“Same as the last one. The guys on this crew are super laid back. I almost wish I switched from constructing commercial buildings to houses a long time ago. These guys are great.”

It makes me so happy to hear you talk about how much you like your new coworkers. I know it’s different. You build houses and apartments now with a new contractor, and I know you”re comparing them to working with Trey. I’m sure you miss his friendship, and I still regret even thinking of taking him from you. Out of everything I’ve done, plotting on Trey is the only thing I truly regret. I would take it back if I could, but I’m overjoyed by the fact that you”re settling in with your new crew here. Seeing you happy again makes my heart smile.

“That’s always good to hear,” I admit, to which you nod. “So what brings you by here?”

“I just wanted to stop by and see you on my way back from lunch. Like I said, I missed you.”

I take your hand in mine. “You’re so sweet, Sir. Here, let”s step outside for a bit. I’ve been sniffing fish all day. Hey Larry, can you watch the front for me?”

Larry waves kindly as you and I exit the store and stand in front of your work truck.

“So, any plans for dinner tonight?” you ask, wrapping your arms around my waist and pulling me in close.

“I hadn”t really thought about it, but I know what you could have for dessert,” I answer playfully.

“Oh I know, too,” you say. “I know we’re still slowly building our money up since we left everything behind, but as soon as we’re good again, I’m ordering a St. Andrew’s Cross for the basement. The little toys are nice, but I miss the big furniture.”

I smile wide. “You and me both. Don”t worry, Justin, I’m willing to let you tie me up anywhere.”

“Let me? What makes you think you have a choice?”

Both of us laugh devilishly before falling into another kiss that darkens the sun. The thing I love most about you and I is that it doesn”t matter where we are. We can be in Philly, Alaska, California, or fucking Timbuktu. Our names can change from Evan and Journey to Shawna and Justin. I can cut my hair and even dye it, and you can grow a thick, long beard while gaining weight. None of it matters. We are always us. We always treat each other like our love is brand new. The bodies dropping are worth it for this. For us.

“Alright Shawna, I have to get going,” you tell me, your forehead still connected with mine. “I can”t wait to come home to you.”

“Me either,” I reply.

Then you kiss me and turn on your heel. The truck engine fires up and you give me a quick wave before backing out of the space. As you go, I pull out the informational card that I pocketed when you walked in, and I read the info on it while remembering the moment you held the door open.

Kay Knight, 1733 Clarion Loop in Seward, Apartment B.

“Sir!” I call you with a wave. You stop and lower your window with raised brows. “Never forget that I love you.”

You smile at me with joy shining from your eyes because you know just like I do that we made it. Our plan worked and now we get to be happy. “I love you, too, Little Devil.”

I watch you leave, standing in the same spot until I can no longer see your truck. Then I get in my car and enter an address into Google Maps.

I stare at the display as it works its magic, formulating a route to Kay Knight’s address in only a few seconds, and estimating for me to get there in just ten minutes. I don”t know if she lives alone or not, but it would probably be so easy to sneak in, or wait for her to come outside to take out the trash or retrieve something from her car. I could teach her not to stare at what is mine, and the thought of it makes my heart race.

I raise my hand and let my thumb hover over the word “Start.”

But instead of pressing it, I back out of the app. I open my door and climb out of the car, and I go back inside. I pat Larry on the shoulder and thank him for manning the register for me, and I place Kay Knight’s card in the pile with the rest of them, pushing it into the middle so that I don”t have to look at it.

I think I’ve done enough damage with the secrets I’ve kept from you, Sir. We’ve run enough. We’ve killed enough. Here in Alaska, we have a chance to start fresh. There are no buried bodies in our backyard, and no buried secrets in my heart. We are free, and I won’t let Journey drag old habits into Shawna’s new life. Justin doesn”t deserve to be lied to anymore than Evan did. So I’ll keep my black thoughts at bay the same way you do, following your example and ignoring the voice in my head telling me to do things I know I shouldn’t. Together, you and I will create a new dark and twisted world, just for the two of us. Dominant and submissive. King and queen. God and goddess. Justin and Shawna.

Untouchable.

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