Chapter 31
CHAPTER 31
C ould Lose Him
Symphony
I wake wrapped in Michael’s big, strong arms. He is snoring heavily as his chest is pressed to my back. My body is sore all over and I need to use the restroom.
I go to wiggle free of his hold and freeze when I look down at his forearm. He has a tattoo I’ve never seen. It’s of a ballerina. She is dressed in black with red slippers. However, what takes my breath away are the musical notes she looks to be dancing through.
Ellen Mairettie’s words come back to me. They are so loud and clear as I stare down at the tat. I fight to trap the sob that rises in my throat.
I can’t prove any of this today, but you will know I have told you nothing but the truth when you see the dancer within the music. When you see her, not only will you know I have spoken nothing but the truth to you, but you will also know you have to be the strong one and walk away.
I cover my mouth to hold the sound in. Michael groans and rolls away from me. Not thinking twice, I leap from the bed and rush into the bathroom.
Closing the door behind me, I then rush to climb into the tub. I sit inside and wrap my arms around my shivering body. I’m trying my best not to hyperventilate.
“No, no, no,” I whimper.
It’s Michael. Michael is the one who bears the dancer. After what we just did, I am going to have to walk away from him? If I don’t, he will lose his life because of me.
“ Why? ” I sob loudly.
As Ellen’s words fully set in, I can’t hold in the sobs. The agony of having to leave him rips through me and more sobs tear from my lips. Hot tears slide down my cheeks.
I have to find Adriano. We have to leave. I can’t stay here and lose the man I love.
Michael
I jump from my sleep and take in a sharp inhale. Looking around, I try to catch my bearings. The sobs that woke me were coming from my bathroom.
I run a hand through my hair. Symphony. She was asleep in my arms when I passed out after we spent hours making love.
Well, some of it was fucking. Who am I kidding—a lot of it was fucking. However, now she’s in my bathroom sobbing.
“Fuck. Not again,” I mutter.
Earlier was amazing, but what if it wasn’t for her? I knew I should have slowed things down. Why am I such a moron when it comes to her?
Frustrated with myself, I climb from the bed and head to the bathroom. I’m relieved when the knob turns and I’m able to push in. I find her in an empty bathtub, sobbing as if she’s just lost everything.
“Sim,” I say gently.
She doesn’t answer. I move farther into the bathroom and climb into the tub behind her. Wrapping my arms around her, I hold her against my chest.
“Baby, are you okay? What’s wrong? Did I hurt you?”
She shakes her head, but she keeps sobbing. I kiss her shoulder and tighten my hold. I can’t believe I’ve allowed this to happen again.
As much as I want my wife, I don’t think we’re going to be able to make this work. I don’t know what I keep doing wrong. I thought this was what she wanted.
She came here to me. I thought we both enjoyed the experience. She pleaded with me for more.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. You thought with your cock, Michael. She wasn’t ready.
I will never forgive myself for this. All I can do in this moment is hold her in my arms and comfort her. She turns in my embrace and climbs into my lap, wrapping her body around me.
Leaning back against the cool tub, I hold her close and hum “Für Elise” in her ear. I don’t want to lose her, but this might be too much. I can’t have her crying every time we’re intimate.
Soon, my lids grow heavy, and I’m finding it hard to keep them open. I’m too tired to stand and carry her back into the bedroom, so I surrender to sleep with her pressed against my chest. We will talk in the morning.