Chapter 38
RIOT
Getting out of the shower is like coming up for air after drowning. The bathroom’s foggy and warm, and there’s laughter echoing off the tile. Sawyer has a towel twisted around her hair, and Jasper keeps smirking at her, like he can’t believe this is real either.
We end up tangled together in Jasper’s bed with Sawyer wedged between us like she’s the missing piece we never knew we needed.
She curls into Jasper’s chest, her hair spread across his shoulder, and I can’t stop touching her.
My hand finds hers under the sheet and I lace our fingers together tight like I’m scared she’ll slip away if I let go.
We lay together in silence, the only sound is the humming of the AC unit and three heartbeats. It’s fucking perfect, but it’s also terrifying. I don’t ever want to lose this… Lose her.
“You alright, Trouble?” Jasper’s voice breaks the silence as he runs his hand up and down her arm.
Sawyer nods, and I swear I feel the tension bleed out of her, as she laughs. It’s quiet, but it’s real. “Yeah. I’m just…really fucking happy.”
I grin and nudge her with my nose, pressing a kiss into her hair. “Yeah? Not too overwhelmed? You did go from living alone to now living with two rockstars.”
She laughs, and the sound goes straight to my chest. “Overwhelmed, but in a good way.”
I watch her, cataloguing everything. Her flushed cheeks, her eyes all soft and shy, the way she looks at Jasper and then at me, like she can’t believe this either. I get it. I don’t think I’ll ever believe it.
Then she looks up, voice barely more than a whisper. “Can I ask you both something? Is this…real? I mean, is it really going to be all three of us? Not just for tonight, not just while everything feels perfect? Do you guys—” She bites her lip. “Do you really want me? Really love me? Both of you?”
The question guts me and I see Jasper tense, see the flicker of worry in his eyes.
I realize this is going to take a lot of reassurance and communication.
Which is no problem, I don’t mind telling her every single day how much she means to me.
I just wish she could see herself through our eyes.
She’s had it rough for so long that it’s just going to take time for her to accept the love we give her.
Jasper rolls over, pulling her close until she’s all but smothered.
His voice is raw, nothing like the cocky asshole the world thinks he is.
“Sawyer, I’ve never loved anyone like this.
Never even thought I could. I don’t give a fuck what anybody thinks—this is real.
You’re it for me. And if it means I have to share you with this idiot—” he shoots me a look, but it’s all warmth, “—then I’ll do it every day for the rest of my life. ”
I can’t help but laugh, nerves finally breaking. I lean in, kissing her cheek, letting my forehead rest against hers. “I didn’t see this coming,” I admit, voice shaking. “But I don’t want anything else now. Not if it means losing you. I’m in, Sawyer. For real. I fucking love you.”
Her eyes glisten in the dark, tears clinging to her lashes. She looks at both of us, like she’s telling herself it’s real, that she can trust us to take care of her heart. “So we’re really doing this? All three of us.”
Jasper presses his forehead to hers, wiping away the tear that slips free. “Yeah. We’re really fucking doing this.”
I pull her back against my chest, wrapping my arms around her waist, breathing her in. “You’re ours, Sawyer. For as long as you’ll have us.”
JASPER
Sawyer’s leg is hooked around mine, her cheek resting on my chest. Riot’s arm is slung over her waist, his hand splayed over her stomach like he never plans to let go. The room is quiet, shadows drifting over bare skin, the afterglow making everything feel slow and safe.
Sawyer shifts a little, tracing lazy circles over my ribs. “Can I ask something else?”
“Anything, baby,” I murmur, smoothing her hair back.
She bites her lip, glancing at Riot, then me. “What about…families? Like, what do we tell them? Or do we even tell them at all?”
I sigh, honest for once. “I’m not gonna lie, it’ll be a lot. My mom—” I stop, shake my head, “—she doesn’t get a say in my life anymore. My brother already knows, and he’s happy for us. If people don’t understand, that’s on them. I just want you. I don’t care about anyone else.”
Riot squeezes her waist, grinning. “My parents barely survived the last tour drama. This’ll probably kill ‘em.” He laughs, but there’s no real fear in it. “But seriously…fuck ‘em. I don’t think they will care, though. We’re not living for anybody but us.”
Sawyer’s eyes get all watery, but she smiles. “And do you ever think about kids?”
The question catches me off guard, but it strikes a deep chord. I’ve never thought about having kids. Hell, I didn’t think I’d find somebody that I’d want to be with for the rest of my life. I turn my head to look at her, and suddenly I want that future so bad it hurts.
“Hell yeah, I do. You’d be the hottest fucking mom walking around with my baby.” I grin, letting her see how much I mean it. “I’d want that. All of it. The mess and chaos and tiny hands and you—barefoot in my shirts, belly all round and glowing.”
Sawyer blushes, laughter breaking up the nerves.
Riot smirks, rolling onto his back, hands behind his head. “Yeah, well, don’t count your tattoos before they’re inked. Might not even be yours, Reign. Might be mine.”
I shoot him a look. “You wish. She’s not gonna let you knock her up first. She loves me more.”
Sawyer giggles, curling closer, shaking her head at us both. “You’re both insane.”
I lean in, kissing her sweetly. “I want a future with you—whatever it looks like. You, me, and whatever little monsters we make.”
Riot slides a hand over her stomach, voice suddenly serious. “I want that too. Us, no matter what.”
Sawyer lets out a shaky sigh, tears slipping down her cheeks, but she’s smiling.
And for once, the future doesn’t scare the shit out of me. Not with her…and I guess Riot too.
SAWYER
I lie there tangled between them, thinking about everything they’ve just said—about families, about futures, about kids and chaos and all the things I never let myself hope for.
The weight of it is almost too much, it’s beautiful and terrifying all at once.
I close my eyes and try to hold it inside me, scared I’ll blink and it’ll all disappear.
Jasper’s hand strokes my hair, and I feel Riot’s thumb tracing lazy circles over my stomach. I know this is real. I feel it everywhere.
Then Riot breaks the silence as a cocky grin spreads across his face. “Seriously, though, I bet I’ll get her pregnant before you do.”
“You wanna bet on that, Riot?” Jasper says, arching a brow.
Riot props himself up on an elbow, eyes gleaming. “Yeah, I do. First one to put a baby in her gets the other to—what, handle all the dirty diapers?”
Jasper rolls his eyes, but there’s a competitive glint in his stare. “Fuck that. First one to get her pregnant gets to pick the baby’s middle name—no vetoes.”
They’re both grinning now, the tension melting into something ridiculous, something so completely them. “What, you wanna start right now?” Riot jokes, waggling his brows. “I’m ready if you are, Reign.”
Jasper looks me over like he’s honestly considering it. “Could settle this tonight, Little Demon. You up for it? Let’s throw out those birth control pills.”
The look on their faces is so deadly serious I burst out laughing—real, full-body laughter that shakes the bed and makes my stomach ache. “Oh, hell no, not yet,” I manage, still laughing as they both start to laugh with me. “I want to enjoy time with just us for a while. Let’s just be us, okay?”
Jasper pulls me closer, pressing a kiss to my forehead. Riot drops back on the pillow, still laughing, and hooks his leg over mine.
I sink back against the pillows, tucked safely between them, their laughter still echoing in the dim room. It’s impossible not to smile, even as tears threaten to well up again, this time not from pain or fear or heartbreak, but from something so big and beautiful it almost hurts.
I think about every version of myself I’ve ever been—the scared little girl who hid in corners, the teenager who flinched at slammed doors, the woman who spent so long believing love was something that always left.
I remember the nights I stared at the ceiling and cried myself to sleep.
Convinced I’d never be enough for anyone.
Too broken. Too anxious. Too much, or not enough.
But right now, with their arms tangled around me, I finally understand what it means to be wanted exactly as I am.
Jasper’s thumb brushes lazy circles on my hip. Riot’s breath stirs the hair at the back of my neck. They love me—all of me, even the parts I tried so hard to hide. They’ve heard my scars, my fears, the pieces I thought made me unlovable, and are choosing me anyway.
Maybe, I don’t have to wonder if I deserve this. Maybe, I don’t have to fight to keep it. I just get to have it… Enjoy it.
Being loved, safe, and chosen.
My whole life, I’ve always waited for the other shoe to drop. For happiness to be yanked away the second I started to believe in it. But now I don’t feel afraid. Not with them. Not with us.
I fall asleep smiling to myself, letting the warmth settle in my bones, and I think, ‘Maybe this is what the beginning of a real, happy family feels like’.