Chapter Eight Jamie
Chapter Eight
Jamie
Jamie drove home in a trance.
He’d always been the kind of person who needed time to process things and, with the exception of on the baseball field, had never been much of a snap decision-maker. He preferred a slower pace, reviewing all angles and the pros and cons of a situation, and considering the consequences of decisions before he made them.
A trait he had not learned from his father.
May—no, Elliott, apparently—had been the furthest thing from his mind as he’d stepped out the door to head to The Patriarch tonight. When he’d agreed to try things again with Carly, he’d firmly shut away the memory of that night in Old Market into a far corner of his mind, well beyond reachable in his conscious moments.
He’d accepted that dreams were out of his control, but even those had become few and far between.
To say it was a shock to see her tonight was like saying Babe Ruth was just an okay baseball player.
He hadn’t thought he’d see her again.
Ever.
Didn’t think he’d ever know why she disappeared that night, either. Apparently she’d been about to go through a crazy medical procedure, which made sense in hindsight.
Her blond hair was longer now, almost down to her shoulders, and several shades lighter. Otherwise, she looked the same, and he’d known it was her right away. When she laughed at something Stephen said, he’d remembered the first time he’d heard it: sitting alone at that bar, kind of embarrassed he’d been stood up, then brought out of his pity party by the sound of a woman laughing into her phone beside him.
He was glad Elliott had finished her degree. Graphic design suited her. Probably a weird thing to think since he barely knew her, but it seemed to fit her all the same.
He came to a stoplight and gripped the steering wheel tighter. How on earth was she the one Carly had met this afternoon? Whose life she’d basically saved?
Seriously, what were those odds?
The situation wouldn’t have been so weird if he hadn’t kissed Elliott that night. If he hadn’t ... felt things that night. He was irritated as hell at the unwanted rush of emotions that flooded him when he’d first set eyes on her tonight—before his rational brain took over.
It had been one night, and it had been a long time ago. It didn’t matter now, and he was fine with that.
But even though he had nothing to hide—he’d been single that night, everything was consensual, and he and Carly hadn’t gotten back together until several months later—he’d pretended he’d never met Elliott. Wasn’t even sure why he’d done it, but the words had come without thought.
No, we didn’t officially meet. Nice to meet you, Elliott.
The flash in Elliott’s eyes told him she hadn’t appreciated the deception, and she probably thought the worst of him for it. Maybe she even thought he’d been with Carly the night they’d met. Which was almost laughable since he was the last man on earth who would cheat on a woman he was dating. He’d watched his dad and brother go through women like toddlers with cheap toys, and he’d vowed a long time ago to never be anything like them.
But it was fucking inconvenient to be blindsided with the woman who’d made him believe in the concept of soulmates while accompanied by his girlfriend, a woman he respected and cared for.
So yeah, he’d panicked.
If it were up to him, he’d avoid Elliott after tonight. Omaha was a decent-size city, and he didn’t care for Starbucks. But with Carly’s clear intentions to befriend her and asking her to get involved with his sister’s business, things weren’t looking good. Once Carly decided to take someone under her wing, there was no stopping her.
What would his sister think about Elliott?
He shook the thought away, vowing to deal with that bridge when he came to it.
He arrived at his apartment just as unsettled as when he’d left The Patriarch and walked up to the second-floor apartment. His yellow Lab, Hank, immediately jumped on him in greeting before going straight to the leash hanging by the door, tail wagging.
“Need to go out, buddy?” He tossed his wallet and phone on the kitchen table. “A long walk sounds like a good idea.”
Jamie’s mood was still shit the next morning. He hadn’t slept well and sat at his kitchen table for a good half hour, nursing a cup of coffee, before he finally decided he’d better at least let Hank out to pee and run around a bit.
He pulled on athletic shorts, and soon they were weaving between apartment buildings toward the dog park at the center of the complex. The fenced-in area with a section for large dogs and another for small ones was the biggest selling point for this place. That and the running path that circled the large development, giving him a multi-mile loop when he wasn’t in the mood to drive to one of the lakes or trails.
Hank’s pull on the leash strengthened the closer they got, and once Jamie slipped him through the fence and unclipped his leash, he was off like a shot toward a group of dogs in the corner. Jamie propped his arms on the fence and grinned. It was impossible to be in a bad mood while watching dogs play.
When he’d run circles to his heart’s content, Hank loped back to Jamie, and they made their way back across the grass. A mere ten yards from the dog park, Hank paused and plopped down onto the grass, panting happily with his tongue lolling from his mouth.
Jamie arched a brow. “It’s a lie-in-the-sun day, huh? Fine. But just for ten minutes, okay? We’ve gotta run some errands later.”
Jamie sat down beside Hank, propping his forearms across his raised knees. He took a deep breath of the fresh morning air and exhaled, his gaze aimlessly passing around the apartment buildings bordering the park.
That’s when he saw her.
On a second floor balcony, not ten yards from where he sat, stood Elliott.
She didn’t return his shocked stare, so she didn’t appear to have seen him. Her hair was pulled up into a tiny, messy ponytail, not something she’d have been able to do the last time he saw her, and she brushed away a few strands that had escaped in the breeze. She wore a white tank top and jeans, her slender arms resting on the railing. Her face angled toward the sun, and she closed her eyes for a beat, a small smile spread across her lips.
Unbidden, his brain conjured her scent that had surrounded him last night, and the subsequent crackle in his chest made him uneasy. He was in a committed relationship and had never been even remotely tempted by another woman when he had a girlfriend. He’d always figured if he was, something wasn’t right.
He wasn’t so susceptible that a single reunion with Elliott made him question what he had with Carly, but that tug beneath his sternum, plus the lingering lie he’d told about not knowing Elliott, turned over like hot stones in his gut.
As if he’d called out her name, her eyes suddenly popped open, and her gaze collided with his.
Shit. It had just been a few seconds, but it probably looked like he’d been sitting here staring at her like a total creeper. Reflexively he dropped his attention to the ground, but that made it even worse. He looked back up at her, his face heating, and raised a single hand in an awkward wave.
She straightened, blinking, and though he was a little far away to be sure, her brow furrowed. “Jamie?”
Hank lifted his head at her voice.
“That’s me,” came out of his mouth, like a complete dumbass.
She said something just as a cacophony of barking chorused from the park, and she repeated herself, louder. “Do ... do you live here?”
“Yeah.” He stood and jerked a thumb behind him. “On the other side, but I bring my dog here all the time.”
“Oh. I do, too. Live here, I mean. Obviously?” It came out like a question, and she rolled her lips between her teeth as if telling herself to stop talking.
They regarded each other in silence for a beat, and he wished for something else to say. He hadn’t expected to see her again so soon, and definitely hadn’t expected to practically be neighbors. There were things he wanted to tell her—things best said without a group of friends or strangers around to overhear.
Should he, though? Was there any point in clearing the air, or was it best to leave her thinking the worst of him, which might encourage her to keep her distance?
A beat of silence stretched for what felt like minutes, and she removed her hands from the railing and took a step back, as if to head back into her apartment.
“Can we talk?” he blurted. “Could you, I mean ... Do you mind coming down for a minute?”
Her eyes shifted to the sidewalk. “Okay.”
Jamie shifted on his feet while he waited, folding his arms and then thinking better of it, eventually sliding his hands in his pockets. Hank, still panting on the bright-green grass, eyed him with curiosity. Or maybe it was pity.
A few minutes later, she appeared around the corner and walked toward them. As soon as Hank realized she was headed his way, he leaped up and took off in her direction. Jamie barely reacted in enough time to grip the leash and avoid his dog bowling her over. He tugged Hank back a few steps, his spinning tail now swatting Jamie on the legs.
She crouched down on her knees and scratched Hank’s ears, grinning, and Jamie had never been happier to have this dog as a buffer. “Well, hi.”
Jamie relaxed a little, and Hank jerked forward to lick her face, pushing her into the grass.
“Hank!” Jamie tugged him back. “Shit, I’m sorry.”
“No, it’s okay.” Elliott held her hand out as if to say she wanted him back, laughing. “I love dogs. I miss having one around.”
Jamie relented, loosening the leash several inches. Hank tucked himself right next to Elliott and rolled onto his back.
“You want a belly rub, huh?”
Jamie registered a feeling of contentment at the revelation she liked Hank and immediately dismissed the thought. He didn’t care if she liked dogs or not. He stood beside them for a minute, felt awkward being the only one standing, then sat a few feet away.
As she slid her hand along Hank’s soft fur, she glanced up at Jamie. Her gray eyes moved back and forth between his, waiting.
“I just wanted you to know I wasn’t with Carly that night.” The words tumbled out in a rush, and his neck prickled with heat. “When we first met.”
Something flickered in her expression, and he couldn’t decipher its meaning. She kept her attention on him as she steadily swept her hands across Hank’s fur, listening.
“I’ve known her a long time and we’d dated before, back in college. But we were one hundred percent not together that night.” He gripped the back of his neck. “I guess ... I needed you to know that.”
Her eyes searched his for another moment, then her shoulders seemed to relax, and she nodded. “Thank you for telling me. That possibility crossed my mind, and I couldn’t bear the thought of doing that to the one person who gave me a chance at life ...” Her voice shook and she trailed off.
He could say more. Tell her that he’d looked for her, thought about her for months. But that moment was gone—they were different people and had moved on, and their situation was different now.
What good would it do?
A quiet question drifted to him. “Why didn’t you tell her we’d met?”
He’d asked himself the same question. “I don’t know. I panicked, I guess. I wasn’t expecting to see you, so it was a shock on its own ... But seeing you with Carly there? I wasn’t prepared to handle that. I’m sorry.”
“Do you think it would upset her to know the truth?”
“I don’t think it would make her happy.”
Elliott nodded, accepting the nonanswer. It wasn’t ideal, but at this point, it seemed best just to move forward.
Silence hovered between them while the sounds of the outdoors and dog park continued around them. After a moment, he said, “So you got a bone marrow transplant. That’s what you were doing last year.”
She dropped her gaze to her hands. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. And that I gave you my middle name and ... disappeared like that. I was admitted the next day, and if I survived, I knew I’d be in the hospital for months. It’s a pretty risky procedure. I didn’t know how it would turn out, and it just seemed easier not to say anything.”
“What exactly happens, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“I don’t mind. The cancer was in my blood, so they gave me really high doses of chemo that killed all the blood cells in my bone marrow. So much that my body never would have been able to make new ones. But that’s the whole point, because left to its own devices, my body keeps turning it into leukemia. After they wipe my cells out, they give me fresh, healthy ones from someone else.”
“Wow.” Even after he’d learned Carly had donated, he hadn’t really known what it meant. “So it’s literally Carly’s blood running through your veins right now?”
“Yeah, I guess you can think about it like that.”
“That’s so cool.” He winced. “I mean, not cool that you had to do that, but it’s ... interesting, I guess.” Stop talking.
“I know what you mean.” He couldn’t tell if she meant it or was just taking pity on him, but he appreciated it all the same. “I think so, too.”
“And ... it went well? It, uh, worked, I guess? You’re okay now?”
Her gray eyes were gentle and focused. “So far, so good.”
“I’m glad to hear it,” he said softly.
“How long have you lived here?” she asked, changing the subject. “In this complex, I mean.”
“About four years. Ever since I got back from Arkansas.”
“Arkansas? I thought ... Didn’t you say you’d always been in Omaha?”
She’d remembered that detail, huh? He stretched his legs out, leaning back on his hands. “I guess I did, didn’t I? It’s true when I’m giving the abbreviated version of my life story.” He gave a humorless laugh. “Or when I’m trying to impress someone, since Arkansas was a failure. My senior year of college I was drafted for pro baseball, but it didn’t work out in the long run.”
Elliott frowned. “I’m no baseball expert, but my dad’s a huge fan so I watched it a lot by proxy. I didn’t think Arkansas had a team?”
“They’ve got minor league. Most players don’t go straight to the major leagues out of college, no matter how good they are. The minor leagues are there to prepare us, but even then, a lot of guys never make it big. The Royals Double-A team is in northwest Arkansas. I was lucky and moved to Triple-A pretty quick and got to come back to Omaha to play. I got injured not long after that, though.” He’d been disappointed at first, but in hindsight it worked out for the best. “Minor-league pay sucks, so I’d been working at my friend’s garden center during the offseason the whole time. When I was cut from the team, I got my certification and started doing it full time.”
She paused her ministrations with Hank. “I’m sorry you got hurt.”
He shrugged. “It happens. I enjoyed playing, but there’s a lot about the pro-athlete life I don’t think I would have liked. I was never into it like some other guys were, so it’s probably better this way. I climbed trees way before I ever picked up a baseball glove.”
She glanced at the midsize maple at the edge of the dog park. “I don’t think I’ve ever climbed a tree.”
His mouth dropped open. “Never?”
She shook her head.
“We—” He caught himself. “You should remedy that. If you can find a good one with a spot to sit and just look out on the horizon, there’s nothing better.”
“I think I might be past my prime for that,” she said with a laugh. “I’m more of a ground dweller, anyway.”
“Got a thing about heights?”
“If by ‘thing’ you mean bone-crippling fear, then yes.” She looked down and added quietly, “I have several of those.”
It was on the tip of his tongue to ask what she meant, but at the last second he went with, “My sister hates heights, too. It’s funny ... That’s actually how I ended up in my first tree. We were flying kites as kids, and hers got caught in one, and she started crying because she was too afraid to go after it.” He grinned at the memory and that ladybug kite that was too torn up by the branches to be used again anyway, which had caused a whole new round of tears when he’d gotten down. “I should thank her for inspiring my eventual profession, probably.”
“You should.” She met his gaze for a beat, then cleared her throat and stood. “I’d better go.”
“Oh.” He scrambled to his feet as well. “Sure.” Hank tugged on the leash, and Jamie tightened his grip. “See you around?”
“Maybe,” she said with a nod, then disappeared into her building.
Jamie and Hank made their way back home, and he realized after the initial awkwardness, he and Elliott had had a nice conversation, almost like they were friends. His first inclination after seeing her last night had been to stay away, but after that?
Maybe he had nothing to worry about, after all.