Illusion of Innocence: Regency Rebelles Series

Chapter 18

Every fiber of Sin’s being urged him to go after his wife, but he knew he had no choice but to deal with the situation Edith Fontaine had decided to visit upon him.

Thrusting her clutching hands aside he all but pushed her back onto the chaise where she’d been when he’d entered the room.

Shock leached the color from her cheeks and her mouth hung open, but she remained mercifully silent.

The child, however, was not so restrained.

‘I don”t like you. I don”t want you for my papa. My papa is in India, and he doesn’t shout. Mama, I want to go home. Now.’

Two little boots stomped viciously on the floor, narrowly missing his mother”s slippered toes and Sinclair saw himself at a similar age, stamping his small boot at his father and demanding to be allowed to ride a real horse. Like Gabe.

‘Hush darling,’ Edith pleaded, pulling him in against her knees. ‘Please be good—just a little longer.’

‘I don”t want to be good,’ the child argued fiercely with another stomp of his foot. ‘He shouts and he’s—nasty. You said—’

‘Shush,’ she said, desperately hauling the child onto her lap. He was almost too large to be there, but he made no demur. ‘Just be good a little longer, so I can—talk to Sin.’

The small dark head that had almost settled under his mother”s chin, popped back up to glare at Sinclair.

‘I don”t want to be Sin—like him—anymore. I want to be Alf, like papa.’

With every word out of the child’s mouth, Sin fought to suppress the burgeoning ache in his belly and around his heart. He’d left India so he’d not have to face this moment of reality.

The boy was not his to claim.

Not—his—to—claim.

‘A good idea,’ he managed to rasp out with a nod of approval for the child. ‘I think your papa would like that.’

‘How do you know?’ the child asked belligerently, glaring at Sin with eyes so like his own it was uncanny. Whatever was lodged in Sin’s chest swelled yet more, making it difficult to breathe, to form words.

‘I know, because your papa is my very good friend. You—’

God damn Edith Fontaine for breaking their agreement. Sin had never felt so choked, so at a loss to continue speaking.

Dropping to one knee before the child, he squared his jaw and tightened his lips. There was no way but forward from here. ‘And you—you—are my gift to him.’

The boy’s eyes widened and the thumb that had crept into his mouth, popped out.

‘Like a birthday present?’

Something cracked in Sin’s chest. Likely one of the iron bars he’d kept about the part of his heart that had always longed to acknowledge this child.

‘Something like that,’ he told the boy solemnly. ‘Your papa wanted a son—and he couldn”t—make one—so I helped out.’ As the little boy”s brows drew together in a puzzled frown, Sin quickly added, ‘It”s nothing to worry about right now. You will understand when you are grown up.’

‘Like you?’

‘Yes,’ Sin said, and felt a softening of his mouth, as if he might smile.

If he”d let himself.

A brief knock on the door heralded Nesbitt with the tea trolley, but Sin waved him away.

‘Mrs Fontaine cannot stay for tea, I”m afraid, Nesbitt,’ he stated coldly and the staunch butler backed out of the room, taking the tea trolley with him. ‘And please ask Briggs to have the carriage readied immediately.’

‘Very good, sir.’

‘Now Edith,’ Sin demanded, surging to his feet as she stared at him as if he’d committed some dire social solecism. As perhaps he had, but he did not want her in his home any longer than was essential. ‘I take it Alfred is not with you?’

The woman blushed deeply, but Sin would not release her from his glare.

‘I couldn”t stay, not after—seeing him with Ahmed.’

Sin considered her steadily for a moment.

‘That”s not new,’ he growled, his glance flickering towards the child, who was now snuggling against his mother and fiddling with the expensive mother of pearl buttons on her gown. ‘Nothing you didn”t already know.’

‘Yes—but—I”d never—seen—’

She blushed even more deeply if possible and looked down at the child whose thumb was now firmly in his mouth. If not asleep, he was not far from it.

‘That man saved you from social ostracism and certain poverty or worse, in a country as unforgiving as India. In return you made vows to honor and obey. He kept nothing from you.’

‘Damn it, Sin,’ she suddenly hissed, ‘I get so—lonely. I didn”t think it would be so hard. I”m not yet thirty. I—I miss you. I was so happy in that month when we—I hoped—thought—we could have more.’

‘You are wed to Alfred, and even if I had not also married in the meantime, I would have sent you back to India. Back to Alfred. Despite not actually needing you to act as his wife, he still needs you in that role to cover for him. That will never change.’ His eyes dropped to the sleeping child before snapping back up to Edith’s glistening gaze. ‘You should simply take a lover. Just be discreet about it.’

‘There’s no being discreet in what serves for polite society in Calcutta,’ she responded bitterly.

‘Which is why it would be better if the man in question was a member of your staff. Someone who actually lives in your home. Totally discreet. Just as Alfred does with his valet.’

Her jaw dropped open and her eyes darkened with horror.

‘How could you suggest such a thing?’ she exclaimed, arcs of furious color highlighting her cheekbones.

Sin shrugged.

‘You will have to work it out for yourself. I’ve already done more than any man should have been asked to do—and I did it for Alfred, not you. The child was my gift to Alfred. Not to you. If you recall the terms of the agreement, we all signed, Alfred has first claim to the boy. And I have the right to step in and claim him from both of you if I deem it to be in the interest of his best welfare. A step only to be taken under extreme circumstances. But I will take it Edith, if I deem it necessary.’ Her whole body clenched about the child. He could at least comfort himself she cared for the lad. ‘You have already broken the terms of that agreement by taking the boy from Alfred and bringing him here. If you do not wish to lose him, you will find a way to live with the bargain you made with your husband.’

For a moment Sin thought she would argue—or beg. Then appearing to think better of it in the face of his intransigent stare, she dropped her gaze to the child in her lap.

Her shoulders slumped and she nodded her lowered head.

With one hand curling possessively about the child’s shoulder, she said, ‘I will return to Alfred. But I can’t afford—’

‘We’ll get to that,’ Sin said, waving her to silence. ‘Where are you staying?’

‘We—came straight from the ship. I—can”t afford to stay anywhere—’

‘You came all the way from India, with the child, and no money? What did you plan to do if I was not here?’

Sin started furiously back towards her, then forced himself away to stare out the window, fists clenching on his hips to keep them from the woman’s fool neck.

Edith Fontaine emitted a deep sigh and closed her eyes.

‘I just prayed you would be,’ she murmured. ‘I allowed myself no time to think, just threw clothes in a trunk, took what money I could lay my hands on and some jewelry and boarded the first ship that would give me berth to England. And prayed.’

The last words were a mere whisper.

‘Have you learned nothing from your past mistakes?’ he growled.

‘Apparently not,’ the woman sighed.

Taut silence followed that raw admission. Slowly Sin turned from the window to face the mother of his child. His partner’s wife.

‘Then this is what you will do,’ he said, his tone stern and uncompromising. ‘I will see you and the boy settled at the Grosvenor until I can secure you passage to India.’

Taking a small leather pouch from his pocket he held it out to the subdued woman.

‘Here is money for your needs while in London. I’d recommend keeping a low profile. Preferably not leaving the hotel. I will let you know as soon as I have secured a berth for you both back to India.’

‘Must I go back, Sin?’ she pleaded.

‘You must, Edith. For better or worse, remember? And you can”t claim Alfred didn”t explain—how he is.’

‘Are you that heartless, Sin?’ Her brown eyes were swimming with tears as she gazed pleadingly at him.

‘I am,’ Sin said, a note of finality in his voice. He could not allow her to think anything else.

Brittle silence filled the room broken only by the return of Nesbitt.

‘Briggs has the carriage out front. Anything else, sir?’

‘Yes, Nesbitt. How are you at carrying children?’

‘I don”t rightly know, sir,’ the butler said, trying valiantly not to show any umbrage at being set such an undignified task.

‘Never mind. Send in Lomas. He will likely manage just fine.’

‘You could carry him, Sin,’ Edith said, a flash of something almost devious in the glance she shot at him from beneath her lashes.

‘No, I cannot.’

Dare not.Just seeing the lad was likely enough to cause him to grieve. His words were sharp enough to finally penetrate. She said no more and meekly submitted to Nesbitt and Lomas seeing her out.

‘Nesbitt,’ Sin called after the butler. ‘Tell Briggs to secure a comfortable suite for Mrs Fontaine and the boy and have the account sent to me.’

Nesbitt bowed and hurried after the departing guests.

Sin didn’t move from his post inside the door, his eyes never leaving the child until he was lost to his sight within the carriage and the butler returned to his side.

‘Where is my wife, Nesbitt?’

Striding along the hallway to the library, Sin had no trouble imagining what Very had thought and felt when confronted with Edith’s sultry charms and a child born in Sin’s image. Every insecurity and doubt she’d ever held about her suitability to be his wife would have roared to the surface of her mind and she’d have judged herself lacking in every way.

And yet the woman gowned in deep lavender silk and framed against the leaping fire in the ornate marble fireplace lacked nothing.

Offered everything he hadn’t known he’d even wanted in a wife. He hadn’t realized he’d wanted a wife until he’d seen her. The one woman put on this earth for him. His body had known the moment he’d set eyes on her at Pennington Towers.

A veneer of fragility, naiveté and fey enchantment surrounded his bride, blinding the casual observer to the mature intelligence, the ripe allure, the passionate depths of the woman behind the illusion.

He was not a casual observer.

The fire blazing behind her was a mere reflection of the feminine power, the raw potency he felt emanating from her as she lifted those eyes of living turquoise to meet his gaze.

Sea-green fury and stormy determination were writ large in every spark of energy emanating from her. She was vibrating with it.

‘How many more—women—are likely to—ambush me from your past?’

‘Verity—’

‘How many, Sin? How many children with the clear stamp of—you—must I confront?’

Goddamn, he did not want to talk about this now. He knew he had to address it sometime, and soon.

Just—not—now. And he knew only one way to shut her up.

Closing the stretch of carpet between them he cupped her face and silenced her with his mouth.

Or tried to. She was having none of it.

Strange little grunting noises hummed against his lips, which might have been meant to be his name—or a curse word. Her small fists beat ineffectually at his shoulders then her fingers clamped into his hair and pulled hard.

‘Ow!’ he yelled, rearing back to glare down at her.

‘Answer my questions,’ she demanded, her eyes like to incinerate him where he stood.

‘Later, Very,’ he snarled, catching her up in his arms and tossing her over his shoulder. Talking was the last thing he was capable of in this moment.

‘Sin, you great lout. Put me down.’

Her fists beat against his back as he strode past the butler, whose usually impassive features cracked with the merest hint of an approving smile. Apparently, the staff also thought it was time he took his wife to his bed.

At the top of the stairs, he turned and strode down the hall to kick the door open into his room.

Saju, who’d been hanging ironed shirts in the dressing room, poked his head out the door as Verity squawked a further protest. One glance between the two and the valet slithered around them with the agility of a feral cat and disappeared out into the hall, closing the door behind him.

‘Now,’ Sin growled, swinging her legs to the floor and backing her up to the wall beside the door. Once there, he caged her in with his body and his hands either side of her head. ‘This moment has waited too long, and the fault for that is all mine.’

His mouth was a breath away from hers, when she pushed against his chest. Hard.

‘Sin, who was that woman? And the child with such a stamp of you no one could miss it?’

Damn Edith Bloody Fontaine and her belief she could make life conform to her self-centered fantasies.

‘Later, Very. I promise to tell you everything later, but it’s not important in this moment.’

He brought his forehead to rest against hers.

‘Not—important?’ she snarled.

His faerie goddess had found her inner vixen again.

‘Not important,’ he averred forcefully against her lips. ‘All that matters right now is you—and me—and finishing what we started all those weeks ago in the minstrel’s gallery at Pennington. What would have been finished if my damned interfering brother hadn’t followed me up the stairs.—I think we were up to about—here.’

With that declaration he covered her mouth with his and dragged his hands down her body, lowering the bodice of her gown and exposing the soft creamy globes of her breasts. With the satisfying taste of her on his tongue, he dragged his mouth down over the delicate skin beneath her jaw.

‘But—Sin,’ she whispered, her voice little more than a moan in her throat and her hands tugging—or clutching—at his hair. ‘The child—’

With his mouth closing on one pouting nipple, Sin was almost beyond recalling himself, but something in Verity’s voice cut through the heat she aroused in him.

She needed something more from him before he could take her where they both needed so desperately to go. He breathed softly on the wet bud of flesh and was rewarded with an involuntary moan. Then his mouth was back at her lips, dabbing delicate kisses to each curvy extremity.

‘Yes, the child was fathered by me, as a special favor to a friend. I did not, and do not, love his mother. Nor do I want her. More I will tell you later. But now, Mrs. Verity Wolfenden, all you need to know and think about is that I love, and want, you. And only you. I want you to be the mother of my children.’

Like stars tumbling through crystalline spring water, her eyes danced up at him and her hands crept into the folds of his neck cloth, beginning to work it loose.

Holding still for a moment, she transfixed him with her translucent gaze.

‘All right. I can live with that,’ she agreed. ‘We will talk later. For I love and want you, too, Sinner Wolfenden. And,’ she growled softly, as her hands once again began unraveling his neck cloth, ‘I long to bear your children. You promised me joy in the making of them. It’s definitely time you showed me the proof of that—and it’s way past time I beheld a naked man in the flesh.’ The neck cloth abandoned on the floor, her nimble fingers tore at the fastenings of his shirt. ‘There’s a marble statue in the walled garden at Pennington Towers. It’s anatomically correct, I believe. But both Lucy and Quelle have intimated it doesn’t do justice to the—size and reality—of a living—um—specimen.’

‘Specimen?’ Sin almost spat the word out on a gust of laughter.

‘Well, I hardly got the chance to look, at Pennington,’ the minx temporized, the words husking as if he’d stolen her breath. Her eyes widened. ‘I would like to—observe—study—absorb the—landscape.’

‘Would you now?’ he asked, his voice suddenly raspy in his throat. Gripping her hands, he held them away from his body. ‘And what are you willing to—barter—for the privilege, I wonder? Considering my exposure to the naked reality of a faerie goddess is similarly lacking.’

‘Barter?’

Any moment now one or other of them would go up in flames. Two perfect, cherry-tipped breasts quivered atop the edge of her stays and the ruffled edges of her gown. Her gaze scorched over his exposed torso with a power like to singe the hair from his chest.

‘Like—my gown for your shirt?’

Her tongue darted out to moisten her top lip and Sin lost the rapidly burning threads of their banter.

‘Exactly,’ he agreed, gripping her shoulders and spinning her about so he had access to the fastenings at the back of her gown. In short order the garment lay in a lavender froth about her feet and her stays quickly joined it.

When he turned her back to face him, she peeled back his jacket and he slipped his arms from it, leaving it dangling from her fingers.

‘Now your shirt,’ she demanded, casting the jacket aside and tugging his shirt tails free of his breeches. ‘Off. Off. I want to see all of you.’

Sin chuckled at her impatience but made no argument. All that mattered was that they both get naked. Now.

‘My boots,’ he commanded, dropping to a chair and raising his foot. To his delight Verity turned her back, straddled his leg and pulled furiously at one well-polished Hessian. Then she climbed over his other leg and repeated the process. The fabric of her chemise was sheer. His wife had the most enticing heart-shaped arse he’d ever seen.

Hidden from him by that last pretense at modesty.

As she turned to grab for his trousers, he grasped two handfuls of the sheer material and ripped the flimsy garment from her body.

‘Sinner,’ she cried, eyes wide with shock. ‘You barbarian.’

No sooner had the words left her lips, than those luminous turquoise eyes darkened with the burgeoning menace of a storm at sea, and her small hands were ripping at the buttons of his falls. But his trousers had a lot more substance than her chemise and he quickly thrust her desperate fingers aside and took care of the problem himself.

To finally stand before her naked, and so ready, more ready than he’d ever been in his life, to toss a woman on her back and enter her, take her, show her—

Show her.

Fuck, he had to cool the ravening need coursing through his blood at the sight of her, his sweet, na?ve—faerie goddess. Goddamn, she was exquisite.

Gazing at him in awe, and maybe a little trepidation, and seeming to have totally forgotten her own nudity.

Her eyes, those incredible seascape eyes, were fixed on his cock.

As if she feared it might attack her or something. Which it bloody well might.

Holy hell.

‘No—no wonder it hurt so much,’ she croaked. ‘Sin. It’s—I’m not sure—’

‘Ah, sweetheart,’ he growled softly, reaching out and drawing her stiffening body into his arms.

Dear God, he held a naked Verity tightly against his naked self. Heaven and hell all tangled in one trembling moment.

‘It hurt because it was your first time—and because I was a self-absorbed cur who should have been strung up by his bollocks for what I did to you that day. I promised to make amends, sweetheart. Trust me to do that? Please?’

He tilted her chin so she could see the promise shining in his eyes. So he could see the hope shimmering in hers.

‘Come to bed with me,’ he said, reaching behind her to pull the quilts back. ‘Will you?’ he pressed when she continued to cling wordlessly to his encircling arm.

Her nod was all he waited for. Lifting her off her feet he laid her in the middle of the bed and followed her down. Her arms reached for him as he lifted himself on one elbow so he could appreciate the pure feminine perfection of her.

‘You have no idea, do you?’

‘What?’ she asked, confusion painting color in her cheeks.

‘How exquisite you are. How divinely alluring you are. How—perfect.’

The adorable creature spluttered.

‘I am not. My breasts are too–too much. And my hips too wide—’

‘And your waist so narrow you are like an exquisitely sculpted hourglass. Perfect.’

He could no longer keep his mouth from her delectable flesh. Closing his lips over one pouting, rosy nipple he suckled. A deep groan of satisfaction climbed up his throat and Verity arched upwards and cried out a hungering plea for more.

To Sin’s intense satisfaction, her hands were once again tangled in his hair and this time he relished the tug against his scalp, the evidence he had immediately transported her to that place he’d promised to take her.

‘Oh Sin,’ she whimpered, as he moved to drag his tongue over her other taut nipple. Her body was so ready for this and he was determined he would show her such pleasure she would never again fear this intimacy between them.

Lipping and suckling at her creamy velvet skin, he made his way back up her throat to take her mouth in an intense and hungry exploration while his hand caressed into the deep indentation of her waist and on down through the soft blonde curls over her mons to delve into the welcoming moisture he found there.

This was how she should be in his arms. With the desperate little moans and the writhing of her entire body beneath him, his dainty goddess was going to come apart in his hands any moment now. Redemption felt damned good and surprisingly humbling.

Though there was nothing humble about his cock.

He’d never had to work this hard at holding himself in check. Better he lost the battle before he ever entered her than take her yet again before she was ready. She was going to be so ready she’d be lost and screaming for him.

His questing fingers found her sensitive nubbin, circling and teasing across its straining protuberance. Goddamn—

‘Siii-iiin! What—oh God.’

‘That’s it, Very. Let it come. This is what I wanted for you.’

Her body convulsed beneath his hands, and he closed his mouth over one quivering nipple and suckled deeply.

‘Oh Sinner, Sinner, Sinner. I want you now. Oh please.’

‘Thank God,’ Sin whispered fervently and lifted his lower body between her knees while keeping his mouth firmly attached to her breast. He would give her no chance of recollecting their first disastrous union.

This, now, would obliterate all else from her consciousness. He pressed the head of his cock to her opening. She was so wet it was no difficulty sliding in a little way, but she was so tight, so untried, he knew he had to take it slowly.

Fucking hell. Slowly, Sinner.

Every cell of his being demanded he surge deep, impale her, make her his so fundamentally she would never deny him again.

Slowly, Sinner.

Fastening his lips about her other breast, he drew her nipple deep into his mouth and as her body jerked upwards chasing the ecstasy he offered, he thrust a little deeper into the hot, satin depths of her womanly channel.

Dragging heated, demanding kisses up her neck he closed over her mouth and used his tongue exactly as he would soon use his cock.

Not yet. Not—until—she—begs—me.

‘Mine,’ rasped against her lips then. ‘Tell me you’re mine.’

‘I’m yours, Sin,’ she cried, so instantly obedient and surrendering he came perilously close to responding with every carnal compulsion in his body. ‘Oh please.’

Her hips thrust upwards, seeking more.

He held himself absolutely still.

‘Please what, Very? What do you want?’

‘I—You—’ she whimpered, her eyes tightly closed and her fingers digging into the straining muscles of his buttocks. ‘Show me—what you promised—oh please move in me.’

Finally, Sin allowed his body to follow its natural instinct and to sink balls deep into his woman.

Allowed himself to withdraw and plunge forward again.

And again.

She was verging on another climax, breath coming in short sharp rasps and hips jerking up to meet his every thrust. Please God, he could wait her out, but she was making it damned hard for him.

Hard.He’d never been so bloody hard. Damn, he was losing it, was beyond controlling his need to thrust—and shatter—

‘Sin. Oh dear lord, Sinner.’

She was right there with him, imploding helplessly around his cock. Sin allowed himself one final lunge then gripping her hips, held her fast and poured his seed into her womb.

It was minutes before his chest stopped heaving, his muscles relaxed enough to ease his weight off and settle beside her. But he couldn’t let her go. Might never—

‘Your fate is sealed,’ he breathed into the tangle of her hair beneath his chin.

Arms wrapped about his body, she clung tight with her face buried against his chest.

‘What fate?’ she asked, her voice muffled against his sweating pectorals.

‘Confinement to this bed, with me, for the foreseeable future.’

‘A terrible fate then.’ She lifted her flushed face, eyes dancing and mouth wide with still-breathless laughter. ‘And I can see I have no choice but to surrender to fate. I trust—you are a man of your word?’

‘Minx,’ he growled, stealing her lips in a long, sensuous kiss that quickly had her arching importunately against him and mewling for what he wasn’t quite recovered enough to offer—just yet.

He dropped his head back onto the pillow and closed his eyes, squeezing the lids tight against the doubt suddenly sliding into his mind.

‘Can you forgive me, Very? Have I shown you how it should be? Dispelled any fears I created in my bull-headed mishandling of your first time?’

He could feel her hovering above him, absolutely still, silent. Thinking, perhaps?

Breath tangled in his throat while he waited for her answer.

Nothing.

Finally, he opened his eyes.

Orbs of flaming turquoise blazed above him, obviously waiting for him to look up at her.

‘Your fate is sealed, Sinner Wolfenden,’ she told him softly. ‘I may never let you out of this bed for way beyond the foreseeable future. Do you think Mr. Jay will send a tray of sustenance up from time to time?’

Relief had him surging up to roll her beneath him and it was well into the foreseeable future before either of them had another thought for sustenance or anything else.