Chapter 27
Jason
Jason glanced up when the door to the café opened and smiled. This was the first time his brother and sister had visited him at his new job, and he’d ensured he’d be able to take a break so they could have lunch together.
He nodded toward one of the half a dozen tables they had in the café. “I’ll bring out the sandwiches in a minute.”
Mathew and Penny wasted no time in taking a seat, and he got to work. Once the sandwiches were finished, he wrapped them in paper and brought them out to his siblings. “The sourdough was baked this morning.” He offered each of them an Italian sandwich.
The small table barely allowed for the three of them to sit together, but he made it work. Jason eyed his sister, more than a little tempted to ask her if she’d heard from Isabelle.
He already knew what she’d say, though. There were too many laws when it came to patient confidentiality. He wouldn’t hear the end of it if he did ask. She’d once told him that the intent to set up an appointment was enough to lock that information up tight.
Penny stared right back, her face a mask of unreadability. She probably knew exactly what he was curious about. Isabelle had been an ongoing conversation ever since she’d come into his life. Mathew could have lost his license for the things he’d agreed to do to help when Jason had dropped her off.
That situation might have been one of the reasons Mathew had left his job in the city.
Jason shifted his attention to his brother as that thought crossed his mind.
Mathew had never mentioned the reasons for relocating.
Not explicitly. He would have said something if Jason had been part of the reason, right?
“So.” Mathew cleared his throat and gestured to the café. “This is nice. I didn’t think you had it in you to enter the restaurant biz again.”
“This isn’t exactly a restaurant.”
“You serve food. I’d say that’s close enough.”
Jason huffed. “Not hardly. It’s more like a bakery that serves more than baked goods.”
“Yeah.” Mathew snickered. “A restaurant.”
“Will you leave him alone? He doesn’t need you pointing out anything about his life right now.
” Penny let out a sigh before she reached for her sandwich and took another bite.
She covered her mouth as she chewed, her brows lifting.
“This is really good,” she said around the bite she swallowed. “You made this?”
“Well, obviously,” Mathew said. “Did you see anyone else behind the counter fixing us food?”
Their sister gave Mathew a dark look. “I mean the bread.” She turned her attention back to Jason. “Seriously, I didn’t realize you had a knack for this stuff. I mean, I ate at your restaurant in the city all the time. But this is different, right? Takes different skills?”
Mathew scoffed, then grunted when his sister elbowed him in the ribs.
“Don’t you start,” she said. “Being a doctor doesn’t mean you’re good at everything from brain surgery to pediatrics.”
“Unless I’m a pediatric surgeon,” he said smugly.
Jason’s focus bounced from one sibling to the other.
He’d missed this. While they’d all been in the same town for a while now, they were all too busy.
Their jobs made it difficult to carve out time to see each other as often as he’d liked.
A smile spread across his face as he took his first bite of his sandwich.
Right in the middle of their bickering, Penny’s phone rang. The table went quiet and all eyes shifted to the lit-up screen. The name Isabelle Palmer would have been impossible to miss. Penny glanced at Jason, then snatched her phone and bolted to her feet.
“You didn’t see that.” She pointed to both of the men. “Neither of you did.” Her face flushed, but it was likely related more to her frustration with her brothers. She quickly strode away and outside. The second the door shut, Mathew leaned forward across the table.
“Well, that’s good news, right? Looks like she’s getting help.”
Jason’s focus was still pinned to his sister as she spoke on the phone. Through the window, he could see her talking with a smile on her face as she paced back and forth in front of the café. “Yeah,” he said numbly. “It is.”
Hope unfurled in his body even though he knew it wasn’t safe.
This was what he’d been hoping for when he’d sacrificed everything he’d looked forward to in his future.
Isabelle was finally doing something. She was finally taking charge of her well-being and exploring options she’d previously refused.
His brother was still speaking to him, but his ears were ringing. He itched to get in his truck and drive straight over to Mateo’s place so he could speak to Isabelle and check on her. He wanted to know how things were going. He wanted to see for himself if she was getting better.
And a selfish part of him wanted to entertain the possibility of getting her back.
Penny entered the café, her expression stern. Before he could say anything, she snapped at him. “I’m not saying a single word. You know I can’t. So don’t even ask.”
Jason nodded.
“That being said,” she continued, “I’m proud of you for stepping back.”
He blinked. Even Mathew looked at her in surprise.
Both of them had told him he’d been sabotaging his relationship—not in those exact words—but they’d pointed out that he’d been treating Isabelle like a project.
Love came in all shapes and sizes, and while it was clear he loved her, he wasn’t showing the romantic sort of love by viewing her as something broken he had to fix.
Jason dropped his eyes to the table and nodded again. What could he say to that? Clearly, Isabelle was improving without him in her life. It terrified him that he would be doomed to keep his distance indefinitely. Would she ever look at him in the way their parents had looked at each other?
His relationship with Isabelle hadn’t been balanced. He could see that now. And it killed him. “Am I a bad person for admitting that it hurts? Knowing she’s… doing better without me?”
Mathew spoke up before Penny had a chance.
“You don’t know that she’s doing better.
Or maybe she is, but it’s not because you’re not in her life.
” His voice was vehement, and it demanded that Jason take note.
“You stepped aside so she could have the chance to find her own path. That takes bravery. It’s scary to relinquish control when you don’t know how things will end up. ”
Penny only nodded.
“I still love her,” Jason croaked. “What if…”
His siblings remained stoic, watching him, waiting for him to confess his darkest fears to them.
“The way I felt about her wasn’t all about fixing her.
” The words were bitter on his tongue. “I was—am—head over heels in love with that woman. I saw sides of her that she keeps hidden away from other people. I fell in love with every piece of her. The broken and the strong. And I’m terrified that what I did was irreparable.
What if she can only associate me with the darkest parts of her life?
What if she doesn’t love me the way I love her? ”
Mathew and Penny were both silent. Neither one of them was married.
While they’d grown up with exemplary examples of love in the form of their parents’ relationship, none of them had found someone worth risking it all for.
Not that Mathew hadn’t tried, but his relationship ended when his work took priority.
Then Jason had found Isabelle.
Penny would be the closest to knowing what to say with her psychology background, but she helped people with personal demons. She didn’t specialize in couples counseling. The longer Jason stared at his sister, the clearer it became that she didn’t have an answer.
He slumped back in his chair and scrubbed his face with both hands. “Maybe it’s just as well. Maybe this was how it was supposed to go all along. Entering each other’s lives for the small amount of time we had.”
Perhaps this was the universe’s way of showing him he needed to appreciate the little things and not let the world pass him by. He’d learned an inkling of that lesson when he’d been working at the restaurant, only to move out to Copper Creek for something slower paced.
“Jason—” Penny’s soft voice shattered the quiet in the café, and Jason shook his head.
“It’s fine. Everything happens for a reason, right? Who knows where the future will take us?”
His sister’s pensive stare spoke volumes. They all struggled somewhat with control and wanting to save the world. It was probably the reason they sought out jobs in these fields. Mathew sighed, but he didn’t speak.
The tension grew excruciating, and Jason reached for his sandwich again even though he’d lost his appetite.
“Anyway, this is the café. Mateo and Nikki, my bosses, purchased this place. They’re going to have me running it for the foreseeable future.
I think Nikki had thought about running it for a while, but she’s busy with everything at the ranch.
Besides, I think she’s realized that it wouldn’t be conducive to seeing her family as much.
It takes a lot of work to keep this place running efficiently. ”
Penny frowned. “But I thought you said it wasn’t as bad as being a head chef at the restaurant.”
“Oh, it’s not. But it is time-consuming.” He nodded to her sandwich. “I’m here at three in the morning most days to get the bread ready for baking. Sometimes earlier.”
Mathew groaned. “I hate early mornings.”
Penny laughed and gave him an incredulous look. “Says the guy who’s on call most of the time and has to go in at all hours of the day and night when there’s an emergency.”
Jason and Mathew exchanged smiles. They all loved their work. Even when it meant losing sleep.
“Well, I’m happy for you,” Penny assured him. “This seems like a great place for you. And you always loved the dessert part of the job. Please tell me you’ll be putting your chocolate soufflé on the menu.”
“Who do you think you’re talking to?” Jason chuckled. “Of course it’s on the menu. That and several other specialty desserts.”
Their conversations shifted to other topics. It was mostly Mathew and Penny chatting about random topics. Medical studies that crossed over their two respective fields.
While spending time with his siblings had given him a boost of sorts, and he was already feeling better about where everything had settled, he couldn’t shake the feeling that something was still wrong.
There was a hole in his heart that refused to be filled by anything or anyone.
Anyone but her.