It’s Only Make Believe

Chapter 32

Chapter

Thirty-Two

TIA

I t’s my lunch break and I’ve eaten my tuna salad bowl and a chocolate muffin. I pick up my cell phone and search through my contacts for Justin’s name. I find him and touch the screen and choose text message. I was going to call him and ask for an explanation for what happened, but I have decided that there isn’t anything he can say that I will accept as a plausible reason for what he did. For that reason, I have also decided that he doesn’t deserve a phone call. He can have a text message and he’s only getting that because I want him to know that I know what he’s done and that I choose Luke over him and would do the same thing a thousand times over.

I stare at the blank screen of my cell phone for a few seconds while I gather my thoughts and then I start to type.

“I know Luke didn’t do that to your face. I know what you did, and I can’t be friends with someone who could do something like that and then lie about it. I wish you well, but please don’t contact me again,” my text message says.

I reread it and I hit send. I was careful not to say I’m sorry we can’t be friends anymore or anything along those lines because while it might have softened the blow a bit, if Justin thinks there’s even a small part of me that’s sorry to see him go, I don’t think he will leave me alone. I do think the bit where I wish him well might soften the blow a bit and stop him from replying and being argumentative though.

It doesn’t stop him from replying. Within seconds of me hitting send, my cell phone beeps, alerting me to a new text message. I already know who it will be from, and I reluctantly pick up my cell phone. I half and half want to just ignore it, but I know I won’t be able to put this behind me until I have read his reply. I open the message.

“Please don’t do this Tee. I know I was a fool, and I regret what I did. I know it’s no excuse, but I was drunk and drunk me thought it was a good idea. Sober me would never have done such a thing. I only did it because I love you though. Forgive me. Be mine once more and I will spend forever making this up to you I swear x,” the message says.

It's actually a lot less aggressive than what I was expecting, but it has no more effect on me than if he had told me to fuck off. There was a time if he had told me he loved me, I would’ve had some sympathy for him at least, but not now. Not after what he’s done. I can’t feel anything for him but a deep dislike.

I start to reply to the text message, but I decide against it. Every reply Justin gets, regardless of what I say, will only spur him on. If he thinks I’m still bothering to reply to him, he will think there’s a part of me that still cares about him, a part he can manipulate into coming around to his side of things. There isn’t and there’s nothing he can say to make me feel sorry for him now, but I really don’t have the energy to waste on arguing with him. I lock my cell phone screen and put it back away.

By the time I’ve cleaned up after myself in the break room, there’s another two messages beeped in. By the time I’ve used the ladies’ room and headed back to my workstation, another one. By the time Karl tells me to either answer my cell phone or put it on silent, another four messages have come in.

I apologize to Karl and pull my cell phone out. I switch it to silent and take a quick look at the messages. All of them are from Justin as I suspected and all of them are variations of him telling me he’s sorry, he loves me, and he doesn’t want to lose me from his life. He even offers to apologize to Luke. I put my cell phone back away without replying. If he keeps going, I will just block his number.

I check my cell phone again an hour or so later and I see that having it on silent has lulled me into a false sense of security. There are over thirty messages now. I don’t have time to read all of those right now and I don’t know if I want to. I open the last one and I instantly wish I hadn’t. Justin has gone from trying to get me to come around to threatening me.

“Watch your back Tee because this isn’t over. I will do whatever it takes to get you back and if that means making your world burn to do it, trust me, I have a match,” the message says.

I block Justin’s number and put my cell phone away. I start to feel better pretty much as soon as I start working again. Justin is just blowing off steam. He can’t make my world burn because the only two people in my world who know him wouldn’t trust him as far as they can throw him.

Now, he’s blocked, and I won’t have to see any more of his bullshit messages. I can just concentrate on work and tonight, I’m going to Luke’s place for dinner. When I’m not concentrating on the lines and lines of code in front of me, I will focus on that.