January’s Bad Boy: Shane (Bad Boys of Mustang Mountain #1)

10. Caitlin

CHAPTER 10

CAITLIN

After my brother practically threw me out of Shane's house, I’m on my way home. Everything that just happened is racing through my head. I know Shane and my brother have to talk, but what startled me was Atlas’s anger. I didn't expect him to be mad. While I knew Atlas wouldn't be thrilled, this was worse than I expected.

What are they doing now? Is Atlas going off on Shane? Is Shane changing his mind? He said he loved me, and I froze because Atlas was standing right there. I never got a chance to say it back. Is Shane changing his mind because of something Atlas is saying to him?My mind is going crazy with all those thoughts circling around in my head.

I have to pull over to the side of the road because with everything going on, I’m beginning to have a panic attack. After doing a few of the breathing exercises my therapist back in the city taught me, I reach for my phone and call my best friend, Paisley. She’s the only other person outside of Shane who knows what happened at work and why I'm taking a break between clients.

"Hey girl, I was about to send a search party out! You go to your brother's wedding and then drop off the face of the earth? Then I heard on the news that you guys got hit with a huge snowstorm that came out of nowhere. You, okay?" She finally stops to breathe after talking in her bubbly, million questions a minute self.

"Yeah, I'm ok, but I need some advice. There are a lot of back stories, but I need to get it out all at once. Can you save the questions for the end?"

"Of course," she says more seriously now.

I go on to tell her about meeting Shane at the wedding and his visits to the store. His story with Atlas, his ranch, and his time in jail. Us having burgers, me helping at this place, the talks, and visits, and leading up to last night at the cabin. Then I end with the grand finale of running into Atlas, the unsaid I love you, and being sent home.

"Where are you right now?" she asks.

"Parked safely on the side of the road because I had the start of a panic attack."

"Alright, you’re in a safe place. So talk. Do you love him?" she asks straight to the point.

I stop and think. Even though my heart and my gut say yes, I want to be sure. These feelings I have for him are unlike anything I've had for anyone else. The thought of leaving him and walking away would kill me. It would be like taking away my air. He just makes me feel like myself again. As if I'm finally home and whole for the first time in so long.

"Yes," I say, barely above a whisper, as I admit it for the first time.

"I thought so, judging by the way you talked about him, but I still had to ask." She then lets out a squeal that I'm sure everyone around her heard. "I'm so happy for you, and I can't wait to meet this guy!"

"Paisley! What do I do now?" I’m trying to keep my breathing regulated so I don't spiral again.

The line is silent for a moment, and I check my phone to make sure the call didn't drop. But it's still connected.

"Paisley?" I ask, wondering if maybe she didn't hear me.

"I was thinking. Didn't you say your brother met his wife through his old friend? One who knew Shane too? Didn’t he marry his old friend’s daughter? If you ask me, I think dating your friend's daughter is worse than dating your friend's sister."

"Paisley, you are a genius! Thank you! I will call you and let you know how it goes!"

"Remember, I claim being your maid of honor!" She calls out as I hang up the phone. As if there would be any other choice.

I change my course. Instead of going to the cabin I rented, I head to Atlas’s house and am grateful that Bex is there. She answers the door with a welcoming smile on her face.

"Oh, perfect! Sister-in-law time! Atlas is visiting Shane, so we have time for just us girls. Come in!" She greets me enthusiastically, bringing me in for a big hug.

"I know he's at Shane's. He sent me home because he's a big fat hypocrite!" Immediately, I feel bad when the smile drops from Bex's face.

"Sit down and tell me what is going on. Do we need wine or coffee?" she asks.

"I want wine, but I need to be able to drive, so can I have coffee please?"

She makes two cups and hands me one before joining me on the couch sitting sideways to face me.

"Okay, what is going on?" she asks.

"Atlas is all pissed because Shane and I fell for each other, which is rich, considering he fell for you." Right away, I realize how that came out. "I love you, but you were the daughter of one of his friends."

"I get what you meant. And yes, I love you too. Atlas and Malice weren't friends anymore when we met. Turns out my dad lied to not only me, but to a lot of people, Atlas included. Atlas saved me in many ways. But you are correct. When it comes to you and Shane, he really doesn't have a leg to stand on. At least Shane didn't kidnap you. Did he?" Bex asks, frowning.

I about snort coffee out my nose at how casually she talks about my brother kidnapping her.

"No, he didn't. We got snowed in at a cabin and one thing led to the next." I don’t go into detail.

"Oh, that's so romantic. Tell me how it happened," she urges.

I do just that. I enjoy my time with her, and we gossip about things going on in town and all sorts of stuff. Since we’re becoming friends, I want to tell her all about Shane and how Shane and I started seeing each other beginning as friends. How it moved to more. As I'm finishing my story, in walks Atlas.

He smiles at Bex, but then frowns when he sees me.

"Want to tell me what happened?" Bex stands up from the couch, confronting Atlas.

Atlas looks at me. Though he’s still glaring, he has yet to say a word. I know he wants to go off on me, but he won't dare chance upsetting Bex.

"You know, in one fight with your sister you invalidated our relationship. You were worse because you kidnapped me. At least Caitlin went willingly," Bex says.

The anger melts away from my brother's face. He quickly deflates, almost collapsing into his recliner while pulling Bex onto his lap.

"Why are you so against this? Is it because he was in jail?" I ask, trying to understand.

"No." Atlas scoffs. "He didn't even do what he was accused of. Malice set him up."

Then he looks at his wife."I'm sorry, baby"

"It's fine. I know my dad wasn't a good person," Bex says.

My head is spinning with the new information from Atlas. Shane went to jail for something he didn't do? Why didn't he tell me?

"You didn't know he was innocent? That Malice set him up?" Atlas asks.

"No. He didn't tell me," I whisper.

"And you wanted him and accepted him, even though you thought he was guilty of what he did?" Atlas asks again.

When I look up at him, the guilt in my brother's eyes is clear as day.

"Yes, I did. He paid for his crime."

"How can you deny them what we have?” Bex asks. “Just because it makes you uncomfortable right now doesn't mean you get to make two important people in your life miserable."

I swear my respect for this girl skyrockets.

"You are right and I'm sorry, Caitlin. I do want you to be happy. Though I just never expected it to be with Shane, of all people."

I feel like he's getting one last dig in.

Apparently, so does Bex because she elbows him. He flinches, but doesn't say anything.

"While I think Bex is wonderful, I never thought you'd be with someone like her, either. Or that you would have kidnapped her."

When I roll my eyes, we laugh, and the tension is finally broken.

"Why are you really here in Mustang Mountain and taking a break between jobs?" Atlas asks.

"What did Shane say?" I don't think Shane would break my confidence, but why is he bringing it up?

"He asked me if I knew the reason you weren't rushing back. When I said no, Shane said I should talk to you about it."

"I had a client get handsy. Someone walked in, so it didn't go very far. But when I told my boss, he brushed it off, saying to keep my mouth shut because the client was a big one. So I left for your wedding and decided not to book any jobs. Though, next month I do have one client. Now, you will stay out of it and let me deal with it?” I give him a pointed look.

After staring at each other for minutes like we used to do when we were younger, he finally speaks.

"Fine, but I’m going to say one more thing. You can’t be with Shane and still live in New York City. That isn't fair to him with everything he's been through. You both deserve more from a relationship than trying to do it long distance."

His words hit me hard. It's from a place of love, and in my heart, I know he's right.

"I have a lot to think about. Right now, I'm going to head back to my cabin," I say.

Bex jumps up and gives me a hug.

"Come over anytime you need us, no notice required," she says in my ear.

Then Atlas wraps me in one of his huge bear hugs.

"I love you and I'm always on your side," he says gruffly.

His words move me, and I almost tear up. I know he always has my back, but it's nice to be reminded of it from time to time, too.

Driving home, I have so much on my mind. I need to talk to Shane, but I decide to do that tomorrow after everything settles and I have some time to think.