Judgments of Fire and Desire
Chapter 1
“I’m sentencing you to thirty years for the assault of a peace officer to be served consecutively and not concurrently with the theft charge.”
The crowd erupted. I pounded my gavel and called for order. This man had so many opportunities to strike a deal. There was video footage of him suplexing a county officer at a convenience store. That move was popular among wrestlers, but it wasn’t intended to be used outside of a WWE ring. That officer sustained a serious spinal injury because of his assault. It didn’t help that the perp had military training.
He fought in Iraq as a marine, and according to his council, he suffered from PTSD. That reason could have allowed for a lesser sentence, but he wouldn’t accept the help provided to him through the government, since he felt like he didn’t have a problem. Unfortunately, because he wouldn’t accept the help provided for the past fifteen plus years that they’d offered it, he would get it involuntarily in the penitentiary.
I stood from the bench as they cuffed him and hauled him out of the courtroom. I didn’t miss the mean mug he’d given me. Slowly shaking my head, I headed back to my chambers. If people just did what they were supposed to do, they wouldn’t have to worry about whether a judge was lenient or not. It wasn’t my problem why or how they landed in my courtroom, and I wasn’t about to allow them to make it my problem.
I took off my robe and hung it on the rack then went to my mahogany desk, preparing to shut everything down to go home. It had been a long day, and I was mentally drained. Listening to the arguments and reviewing evidence, facts, and findings had depleted my energy quicker than normal. Plus, it was raining cats and dogs outside for the majority of the time I was here. My body wanted to slide onto my Tempur-Pedic mattress and hibernate for the next couple of days. I would do just that when I got home.
Just as I was about to head out, my bailiff appeared in the doorway. He slowly shook his head and said, “Man, those people want your head in there.”
I shrugged. He knew I didn’t concern myself with public opinion when it concerned sentencing. As a judge, I was fair and by the book. Taking it easy on people who broke the law was just as bad as having Saturday school for kids who goofed off during the week and didn’t complete their assignments. The truth was, in life, when you messed up, you had to suffer the consequences, no matter how severe they could be.
“Oh well. They aren’t the first, and I’m pretty sure they won’t be the last. I wonder if they felt the same way about their loved one when he nearly broke that officer’s neck.”
Tyson slowly shook his head. “Well, whatever. You wanna go for drinks tonight?”
“Naw. I have to go check on my mama. Maybe tomorrow. Besides, don’t you have a pregnant girlfriend to tend to?”
“Yeah, but she’s going out with a friend tonight.”
“Ahh, you’re gonna be lonely. That’s why you’re trying to hang out with me.”
He chuckled and rubbed his hand down the top of his head. “Whatever. Call me if you change your mind.”
“Mm hmm. See you Monday if I don’t.”
He nodded and left my office as I turned off the lights to leave as well. I hadn’t been to my mom’s house all week. I usually checked on her twice a week, but I’d been so busy. This would be my first visit this week, and it was almost over.
As I walked through the courthouse, I caught a few stares. I knew some of them were people from the case that had just adjourned. I ignored them and made my way to my car. When I got to it, a slip of paper on my windshield slowed me down somewhat. Because of the nature of my job, I’d received a few death threats. None of them had panned out to be anything, thankfully. I supposed it didn’t help that there was a sign with my name on it, indicating that was my parking spot.
I pulled it from the windshield wiper and read it.
One day, judgment will fall on you, and you will be begging for the mercy you don’t give.
I frowned slightly. This one seemed a little more intelligent than all the others, but I refused to dwell on it. I would report it later. I balled it up and threw it to the passenger seat after opening the door. Most likely, nothing would come of it.
When I got to my mother’s house, she was sitting on the porch. The weather was pretty nice, since it was no longer raining. Beaumont was known for its hot temperatures and humid climates, but there was a nice breeze blowing, and temperatures had only reached eighty-five degrees, thanks to the downpour earlier. Although it was the beginning of September, it was still normally reaching the mid-nineties.
As I got out of my vehicle, I glanced at the crumpled piece of paper in the passenger seat. Something was telling me to take this seriously. I decided I would head to the police station when I left my mother’s house. She had issues with her blood pressure, and the last thing I wanted to do was tell her I had received a death threat. I never disclosed any of the other ones I had received, so I wouldn’t start now.
I walked up the stairs to the porch and said, “Hey, Mama. How are you?”
“Hey, baby. I’m okay. I didn’t think I would see you this week. You must have been super busy.”
“Yes, ma’am. I guess it was the week for criminal court.”
She smiled. “Your dad would be so proud.”
I almost rolled my eyes. My dad was an attorney. He died in a plane crash twenty-three years ago. He was on the plane that crashed into the Pentagon during the 9/11 terrorist attack. The problem with that was that he was with his mistress. He was very well-known, and after the incident, his name was brought up in scandal.
So, while my mama was grieving his death, wondering how she would raise her ten-year-old son alone, she was also having to deal with the awful truth of exactly who Kenneth Patrick was. Old photos of him and that woman had surfaced and were plastered all over the place. The entire family was embarrassed at a time when they should have been celebrating his life. It had gotten so bad we ended up leaving Virginia and moving to Texas, where we didn’t know a soul.
I hated him for the mess he created and left for my mama to deal with alone. After his parents died, it was like my mom and I no longer existed to his family. He had two sisters and three brothers, whom we never heard from. His mother died two years after him, and then his father died five years after her. It had been just the two of us for the past fifteen years.
Getting my attention, my mama waved her hand. “Earth to Ky. Whenever I mention your dad, you do that. Regardless of what he did, he would have been proud of you, baby. Kenneth loved you so much. If he knew you were a judge, his chest would be poked out from here to Houston. He loved you with everything in him, son. Reflect on that. Until the mess after he died, you adored him. What he did had nothing to do with you.”
“It may not have had anything to do with me directly, but indirectly, it killed me. I had to watch your hurt, knowing there was nothing I could do to make things better. I had to watch you grieve a man that died while destroying his vows to you. Mama, I love you, and when you hurt, I hurt, even back then. I vowed to make something of myself to make you proud. I refused to let your sacrifices, emotional and financial, be in vain.”
I sat next to her on the swing, and she brought her hand to my cheek. She looked away from me as she lowered her hand. “At some point, baby, you are going to have to forgive him. He wasn’t perfect, but he provided a good life for you. The hatred you have for him is only going to hinder you from completely opening yourself up for love.”
Oh, Lord. “Mama, you know I’m not looking for love. If it happens, great, but it will definitely have to find me.”
She slowly shook her head. “I guess I’ll have grandbabies one day. Hopefully, while I can still enjoy them.”
I rolled my eyes. The woman acted like she was approaching eighty. My mama was only fifty-five years old. She was still going out with friends, dressing like she was twenty-five, and had the audacity to be seeing a couple of men at once. Of course, she called them friends, but I knew better.
She leaned against me. “I just want to see you happy. You can’t be happy if you’re still holding on to the sins of your father.”
I nodded as I allowed the swing to do its job and wrapped my arm around my mama. I kissed her head. “I’m happy, Mama. I promise that I’m open to love. I’m just not trying to chase it down right now. I’m so busy. I need to make sure I’m ready for that and that I have the time to devote to loving someone. When I fall in love, I want to be able to give it my all.”
“Well, son, contrary to what you may believe, love has a way of slowing you down. When it hits you, you won’t have a choice but to slow down and accept that the bug has bitten you.”
I chuckled. “You’re probably right about that.”
“Oh, not probably. I know I’m right about it. Now let’s go inside and eat. I cooked your favorite.”
I frowned slightly. “You cooked surf and turf?”
She frowned as I tried to stifle my smile. “Surf and turf? When did that become your favorite?” After staring at me for a moment, she realized I was doing everything in my power to hold in my smile. “Kyrie Jameel Patrick! Quit playing with me!” she yelled, then swatted me on the arm as I released the laughter I was struggling to contain.
“My favorite is still fried pork chops, French fries, corn on the cob, and two slices of white bread.”
It didn’t matter how old I got. This woman was still going to spoil her only son. I loved her unconditionally for it. She always made sure I was taken care of. Whether she was cooking a meal or offering sound advice, she was always there for me. She provided plenty of swift kicks to the ass, too, when I needed them. It was her love that got me where I was, despite her many attempts to give credit to my father.
Even when he was alive, she was the one who raised me. He was rarely home. He was always traveling the country for this case or that one. It wasn’t until he died in that plane crash that I realized it wasn’t his love of democracy that motivated all those trips. It was his greed, power, lust, and pure audacity that had him everywhere but home. There was nothing Carolyn Patrick could say to make me think otherwise.
While I knew I inherited his passion for upholding the law, we were two different individuals. When I found love, or it found me, I would be loyal to it. What good was it to confess your love for someone only to lie to them later? Once I fell, I would be all in. I would devote my life to my woman just like I devoted myself to my career. I would breathe, sleep, and eat my love for her. Whoever this woman was, she had better be ready.