Chapter Five
The resulting painalmost sent me into unconsciousness alongside of him, but I fought it off. Kindreds experienced any physical pain they caused the other. Too bad it didn’t prevent emotional pain in the same way. Dizziness clouded my head for a moment and I clenched my teeth at the brandy burning my stomach, trying to claw back up my throat.
I hoped I didn’t hurt Sky too badly. I just needed a head start.
Scrambling to my feet, I shoved the rest of my belongings into my pack and set off in the opposite direction of the town I planned to visit. There was another not too much farther from here. Hopefully, they’d search for me in the other village and I’d be long gone by the time they figured out where I was. One more job, stock up on supplies, then I’d take their advice and lie low for a bit.
They needed to understand I had no interest in being their kindred, no matter what my body wanted. They’d have to get over it.
The farther I got from them, the deeper the emptiness, the tighter the tension grew. My head still pounded from my assault on Sky. I shouldn’t have kissed hum. It made the connection stronger. I did my best to ignore it, shoving the pain to the back of my mind, singing my songs under my breath to remind myself of the life I chose and the life I definitely did not want.
The last thing I wanted was to tie myself to assassins who did the king’s dirty work, regardless of them disobeying for me. It had nothing to do with me and everything to do with the bond. Kindreds couldn”t physically hurt each other without experiencing great pain themselves. If I’d killed him, I’d be dead too.
Worry gnawed at my belly. Worry I hurt him badly. Worry they’d find me. Worry the royal guards would be waiting for me. Worry I made the wrong choice.
I couldn’t banish the reminder of how it felt to be pressed up against Sky, how his hands roved on me, how he tasted, smelled. What were Whist and Saber like?
Too bad I’d never know.
My breaths came a little easier once the village was in sight. I slipped my hood over my head to keep my face hidden and strode towards the market stalls. It only took me a few minutes to barter for enough supplies to last me at least a week if I was careful. Unfortunately, I had to forgo another bottle of brandy in favor of more nutritious items. With my pack full, I retreated towards the wood-line, munching on a fresh roll. I hoped I could work in the tavern for the midday crowd. The faster I got in and out of there, the better. But I needed the job for more than my politics with the rest of my money spent on food.
I hid my pack beneath some brush and returned to the town, eyes open for the assassins or the guards. The only thing in the village were people going about their lives. On the surface, this was a prosperous and happy village, filled with kindred souls and their families.
But in every village there was a dark underbelly, something no one acknowledges in anything but whispers. There was the kindredless, the abused, the widowed. Most of whom weren’t welcome into society. They were the ignored and forgotten, the dregs. They were who I played for even if they weren’t there to hear.
I pushed open the tavern door and took a seat at the bar. “Brandy, please.” I parted with my last coin. Might as well buy something I enjoyed.
The bartender poured a glass and pushed it across the counter. “Here ya go.”
“Thanks.”
She eyed the instrument on my back. “You’re a musician?”
I took a sip of my drink before replying. “I am. I’d be willing to play for your midday meal crowd in exchange for a coin or two or a hot meal.”
She pursed her lips in thought. “You any good?”
“I have had no complaints about my skill.” My lyrics, yes. But never my skill.
She drummed her fingers against the counter. “I’ll give you a hot meal and you can keep your coin for the drink and I’ll add a second with your lunch.”
Not as much as I hoped, but it’d have to do. At least I had enough food to last me a bit and the coin back in case of emergency. And it’d been a long time since I’d had hot and fresh food.
I nod. “Deal.”
“Go take a seat in the corner and I’ll bring your food to you.”
I waited in a seat by the window with my back to the wall so I could see the villagers passing by and everyone inside the tavern. Those assassins were crafty. I wouldn’t put it past them to figure out where I was. I needed to get out of there as soon as I could. I considered starting with some less offensive songs first so I didn’t make a stir and draw attention.
No.
I refused to change my set or let the king make me afraid. He wouldn’t shut me up. Not until he sent assassins who would actually finish the job. Until then, I would keep going. For my parents, for the dregs of society.
The bartender brought over a steaming bowl of bordello stew with a large hunk of fresh bread and a slice of blueberry pie. A pang stabbed my chest as the scent of blueberry wafted to my nose, reminding me of Sky.
I nodded in thanks and tucked in to the delicious food. I finished every bite, using the bread to soak up the last bit of stew, but the emptiness remained even as my hunger eased.
I carried the dirty dishes over to the bar and handed them over. “I’ll get started now, if you want.”
“Please. Hopefully, you’ll pull some extra customers in here.”
Feeling guilty, I began my set with my version of a popular song, one everyone in Faligrey knew. I played it differently, but it was still recognizable. My music trickled through the open windows and customers trickled through the door, putting in their orders, mouthing along to the song.
The bartender grinned over at me and I threw her another bone. Her food was superb. Besides, the more people I tempted with regular bar songs, the more people would hear my message.
A few coins landed in my hat and I was even more at ease. Changing my plans and coming to this village instead worked out perfectly.
I moved into one of my originals and no one acted offended, they still seemed to enjoy the show. It energized me and my voice rose.
A hush fell and then the muttering began. Just like usual. I knew it was too good to be true. Even after softening them up, they still didn’t want to hear what the world was really like. They were blind to the truth. They were comfortable living the lie because the law worked for them, it didn’t affect them negatively like it did so many of us. They didn’t want free will and choices. It was easier this way.
I noticed the bartender from the corner of my eye staring at me with a smile on her face. At least I didn’t seem to be offending her. I guessed she’d gotten her pay from the crowd, it didn’t matter if they left in offense now.
My confidence plummeted when four royal guardsmen stomped through the door.