Chapter 9
9
DONOVAN
Hunter split my lip, and in turn, I gave him a black eye.
The fucker deserved it—he doesn’t realize I did this for us .
I did the right thing by letting April know that she doesn’t belong in our world, but I didn’t anticipate it happening at the event.
I didn’t know she heard my words to Steven until I caught a whiff of her scent and followed her out into the rain.
I said we were just having fun with her, but I don’t even know the fucking definition of fun.
The closest I would say I’ve had to that is watching April light up when we play those ridiculous board games.
Or when I sketch her secretly, unable to keep my thoughts from her.
I stare at myself in the mirror.
I look like absolute shit.
I haven’t slept since she left, and the circles under my eyes are prominent and ghoulish.
My stubble looks more like a beard than just a five o'clock shadow, and my skin is sickeningly pale.
Fuck.
I said everything wrong.
It’s not that she’s not good for us— she’s too good for us, but I couldn’t tell her that.
It’s better if she believes the lie.
I glance at my phone, checking her location.
She’s back at work.
She doesn’t know she’s shared her location with me permanently—but I’m doing it to make sure she’s safe.
It’s not stalking.
This is different.
If I was stalking, I would have nefarious intentions.
If this was stalking her, I wouldn’t be pushing her away and letting her believe she’s not good for us.
I’m just taking care of her from afar.
Her bank accounts will always be full, and she’ll never want for anything.
Coward , a tiny voice in my head says, repeating the word Liam used.
But I’m doing the right fucking thing, even if Hunter and Liam don’t agree with me.
I know how to keep her comfortable and make sure she never needs to worry about money again.
Hunter and Liam will eventually forgive me for this.
Eventually, they’ll understand.
The week goes by in a blur.
Our next event with April isn’t for another few days, and I’ve probably slept a total of four hours the entire week.
My packmates don’t bother to talk to me.
And that’s fucking fine.
There is a problem, though.
I can’t seem to stop the tremor in my hands, the one that Liam occasionally gets.
I don’t remember the last time I’ve eaten.
Something is wrong with me.
“Why are you like this, Donovan? What’s wrong with you?”
April’s voice is in my head, taunting me as I drive out of Stone County.
“I don’t know,” I say aloud, realizing too late that I’m talking to myself.
“Only one more week until you see me again.”
She’s never said that to me before, but it sounds crystal clear in my head.
I really need to fucking sleep.
Driving the five hours to the correctional facility isn’t a good idea, but here I am doing it.
As long as I don’t crash, it’ll be fine.
But if I die in a fiery wreck, then Liam and Hunter can have a new pack leader.
“Your self loathing is exhausting, Donovan.”
Her voice, low and taunting, makes my cock twitch in my pants.
“Whatever you say, sweetheart,” I breathe, turning onto the bumpy dirt road that leads to the concrete building.
“Will this make you feel better?”
I could swear she’s sitting next to me in the passenger seat, asking me the question.
“Not sure,” I quip as the gates lift for me to enter. “But it might.”
The man that seats behind the glass is scum.
Kevin Harsch.
He stares at me, phone in his hand, his greasy blotchy face pulled into a frown.
Of course he doesn’t know me, but I know him. I pay my private investigator well for a reason.
“You’re not my lawyer,” he rasps into the receiver. “What the fuck do you want?”
I study him, taking in his appearance.
The shitstain that held April captive.
The O addicted supplier that kept her on the verge of death.
“She was in a coma,” I say into the phone lowly, a growl forming in my throat. “She almost died from blood loss and dehydration.”
I remember the first time I read the police report and how my stomach dropped.
She almost fucking died .
He narrows his eyes. “Are you Karlie’s dad?”
I don’t know who the fuck Karlie is, but my hatred for Kevin doubles.
Fucking cretin.
I shake my head slowly. “I just wanted to see you once,” I say cooly. “And when you get what’s coming to you, know it’s because of me.”
His eyes slightly widen. “Who the fuck are you?” he spits.
He’s showing genuine fear, and I revel in every moment of it.
“This won’t make me forgive you.” April’s voice, still so sweet and clear, warns me. “You know it won’t.”
“Hey! Who are you, asshole? I didn’t do anything!”
I raise an eyebrow. “You did absolutely everything ,” I snarl.
He shakes his head. “Look, I really don’t remember. Whoever the fuck you’re talking about, I don’t?—”
“Kevin.” I say his name, and he pauses, his mouth slightly parted.
“Yeah?”
“I’ll see you in hell. But I’ll be there much later than you.”
Fuck, I sound like Hunter. I really am losing my shit.
“That was a pretty clever line, I’ll admit. Dramatic, though.”
At least Fake April approves.
“What the fuck are you talking about?” Kevin hisses, leaning closer to the smudged glass. “Who are you?”
“April Waters,” I say. “Is that name familiar to you?”
Recognition dawns on Kevin’s face, and he chews his chapped lip and grimaces.
“Shit, is that your girl? I swear I didn’t touch her. I fucking swear, you can ask my lawyer?—”
“You almost killed her.”
Saying it out loud makes me sick. I saw photos of the room he kept her in—a windowless, filthy room with a stained mattress and torn carpet.
She didn’t have enough food or water.
She didn’t even have fucking sunlight , yet she survived.
“I didn’t mean to!” Kevin insists. “I didn’t know. I thought she was fine?—”
“You did it to other Omegas, too. Did you know one killed herself after she was rescued?”
Karlie. The one he mentioned earlier.
“So what?! You blame me for one bitch’s suicide? That’s not my fucking problem, man. I didn’t kill anyone.”
Rage builds in me until my vision blurs, and I exhale slowly.
The lack of sleep isn’t making this any easier, and I know I need to leave before I try to break through the glass that separates us just to strangle the fucker.
But I had to see him once to let him know that when he takes his final breath, it’s because of me.
It’s because he hurt the woman I lo?—
He hurt April.
I look at him one last time, taking in his confused, frightened expression.
He fears me.
And then, I do something I haven’t done in a long time.
I smile at him.
I smile because I know April will have her vengeance.
“What the fuck, man?” Kevin demands. I hang up the phone slowly, and he looks terrified.
“If people freak out when you smile, I think that’s a problem,” Fake April says.
I ignore her.
I rise from my chair, nod at Kevin once, then leave.
The drive back to the packhouse is easy. I stop at every light and don’t nod off at the wheel.
My world may be bleak, but today it became a tiny bit brighter.
As I arrive home, the private investigator texts me.
Everything is in place, and word spreads around a prison fast.
This time, when I lie in bed and close my eyes, I’m asleep instantly.