Knot the Alphas’ Feral Omega

31. Oliver

31

Oliver

I woke up early the next morning and set about making breakfast and coffee in the kitchen after I showered and got ready, ignoring the itching behind my eyes that signaled a night of too little sleep.

That wasn’t anybody’s fault, but it was the reality of my day. The guilt sitting low in my belly like a stone was my reality, too.

Hopefully, both situations would be remedied fairly easily, but I needed to sit the rest of the pack down during breakfast so that we could talk.

I sipped my coffee patiently as I watched the clock, cooking sausage, eggs, and toast while keeping an eye on the time. I heard one, two, and three members of my pack wake up and begin to get ready for the day.

Emmett worked efficiently and quickly, getting up and immediately into the shower as he always did. Lilah and Killian, though...were slower. They whispered—quietly enough that their words were a vague brush against my ears—and it took a little time before I heard the light padding footsteps of Lilah as she climbed out of bed, and then got in the shower as well.

My coffee was bitter and hot, keeping me company while I set the table and waited. My heart fluttered in my chest, and I set my jaw, ignoring the residual guilt and hope inside me after our conversation over dinner last night.

I’d hoped that we’d turned a corner after Lilah and I came to an understanding about both sides of our issues. I was committed to understanding her better and trying to move past her...unfortunate relations. And in turn, she understood...my overreaction.

The conversation I’d overheard in the hallway in the middle of the night had been a gut punch, and then everything I had heard afterward...

God, I was a pervert. Listening in on my packmate and our omega while they spent the night together for the first time— Lilah’s first time.

The sounds of her pleasured cries as Killian fucked her, faint and muffled though they were through the soundproofing of the house...they were in my head now. Living rent-free, always returning at the most inconvenient times no matter how often I tried to lock the memories up in a tiny compartment at the back of my mind, never to be seen or revisited again.

At least, not until Lilah fully forgave me.

It took longer than I wanted it to before I finally heard the sounds of three sets of footsteps coming down the stairs, though it was still a while before Killian, Emmett, or myself needed to be at our respective offices. I straightened up a little as I heard them approaching, setting my coffee mug down and reaching up to straighten the collar of my dress shirt. Then I arranged my face into what was hopefully an expression of placid welcome as the other members of my pack finally walked into the kitchen.

“Good morning.” I stepped back, gesturing at the cabinet behind me, the one where we kept the coffee mugs, and smiled at Killian, who was looking at me with a slight cock to his head. “Get some coffee. I made breakfast.”

Emmett snorted softly, already on to me. He brushed past me to grab a glass, filling it with juice from the fridge before retreating to the dining room. Killian retrieved two coffee mugs and set about filling them, and Lilah looked at me with a soft, nervous little smile as she tucked her hands into the pockets of the leggings she wore.

“Thank you,” she said quietly. “You...didn’t have to do that.”

Her voice trembled the tiniest bit, and I could see her heart beating rabbit-fast in her neck. It made my hands itch, desperate to reach out and soothe my omega in any way possible. I tamped down on the urge, though.

“It was nothing,” I assured her, just as quietly.

Killian handed her a coffee mug, and the smile she sent his way was pure sunshine. It sent a pang of loneliness through me, and my wolf squirmed inside me, desperate to be let out so that I could run free...so that I could run away .

But running away wasn’t going to fix this situation.

I let out a shaky breath, then offered a smile when Killian and Lilah both looked my way. I gestured towards the dining room, my heart rate picking up a little. “Come into the dining room. I need to talk to you all about something.”

A spark of unease lit in Killian’s eyes while Lilah’s brow furrowed with confusion. Both of them immediately wanted to ask me what I was talking about, but I walked away before either of them could pose their questions, taking my seat in the dining room next to Emmett without another word.

The other two walked in and sat down, and then all three of my packmates looked my way with varying levels of concern.

“Um.” My voice was rough when I spoke, and I ran my hand through my hair, clearing my throat before I tried again. “I wanted to talk to the three of you about something,” I started again. “After the conversation that we all had last night, well. I got to thinking...”

Killian arched an eyebrow at me, the trepidation in his eyes quickly turning to annoyance. He and Emmett had known me long enough to know where this conversation was likely going, but Lilah still looked a little lost, and I had more to say before I got to the crux of the issue.

“Well, suffice to say, I had a lot of things to consider,” I said hastily, moving forward. One hand curled into a fist on my lap, and I nodded at Lilah, guilt flooding me again. “I couldn’t sleep very well last night, and I woke up in the middle of the night. I tried to get back to sleep, but I overheard...”

Lilah’s eyes widened slightly, flicking to Killian before returning to me. Killian—the smug bastard—looked more than pleased with himself, but Lilah’s cheeks flushed, and she buried her face in her hands as she let out a tiny little moan. “Oh, fuck.”

I grimaced, and when I glanced at Emmett, his eyes were glimmering with understanding. He inclined his head, giving me the space and courage to continue.

“I...yes, I heard...that. You two. But, um.” I stumbled over my words, swallowing before I sighed. “That wasn’t the concern here, not really.”

Lilah’s cheeks were still pink when she lifted her face from her hands, and when she looked up at me again, her eyes showed new understanding. Her blush drained away, and she shifted around, looking uncomfortable.

“Oh,” she said softly. Guilt colored her voice as surely as it was written across her expression, and she peeked up at me, her scent souring as if she was having a hard time looking me in the eye. “I...I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings, Oliver. But I can’t help the way that I feel.”

Her voice trembled a tiny bit despite the strength of her words, and I couldn’t stop myself from giving her a small smile, impressed by her courage. What a good girl.

“I know you can’t,” I said, something unwinding inside me now that the elephant in the room was out there. “And I’m not asking you to. Your feelings...they’re perfectly valid. And I told you that I would do anything possible to earn your forgiveness.”

My voice broke on the last word, and I cleared my throat, looking down at my hands for a moment before meeting her gaze again. I was no coward, and I was going to look her directly in the eye while I laid out her options.

“I told you last night that I would earn your forgiveness,” I repeated, drawing myself up straight. “But it’s also my job as the Prime Alpha of this pack to make sure that everyone is happy and healthy. And I think...” I swallowed. “I think it’s more than clear that my presence in the house is doing more harm than good—at least right now.”

Emmett shook his head, and I saw him rolling his eyes. Lilah bolted upright, though, her expression suddenly fierce and terrified in a way I hadn’t expected.

“You’re not fucking leaving , are you?” she demanded.

Killian looked at her with some amusement, and I couldn’t help being shocked at her vehement statement. “Um. Well, I was considering it,” I said. Guilt flooded me even further as I saw the slightly uneven blow of her pupils, and I wished that I could check her blood pressure.

I wished that I could touch her without her recoiling.

God, everything fucked up with five minutes of impulsive behavior. Good job, Oliver .

As soon as I finished speaking, Lilah shook her head fiercely and glared at me. She planted her hands on the table and stood up, leaning over the surface until she was right in my face. Her breath was sweet in my nose as she stared down at me.

“I didn’t take you for a fucking coward, Oliver,” she snapped, narrowing her eyes. “And if you run away from me right now, that’s all you’ll ever be to me—a coward. Someone who can’t stand behind their word and who can’t make amends when they’re asked to step up to the plate.”

I sputtered, her words hitting me directly in the chest, right in my pride. “That’s not what—”

“But it is!” She let out a low, cute little growl, and her hand darted out to poke me directly in the chest. “You fucked up. You caused this because of your pigheadedness, stubbornness, and unwillingness to listen to reason. So now you’re going to stay home, right here with us, and you’re going to make it up to me.”

“But you get sick whenever you’re around me,” I said softly, feeling a little dazed and puzzled. This wasn’t how I had thought this conversation was going to go. I was just trying to do the right thing, for once.

“Do you think that’s going to get better if you decide to disappear for a few weeks?” Lilah arched an eyebrow at me, and her scent hit me again, making my wolf growl, low and aggressive. Nobody flinched, though, and she continued to stare me down as I struggled to wrap my mind around what was happening.

“Um. I...”

“You’re not fucking leaving,” Lilah said, leaning close to me. Her eyes burned into mine, and her hands landed on the armrests of the dining chair I was sitting in, squeezing so tightly that the wood creaked. Her eyes flashed omega silver, and she bared her teeth, the tips just the slightest bit sharper, before she growled, “End of fucking story.”

She turned on her heel and marched away, slamming the door to the dining room for good measure. The sound echoed, and I heard her stomping up the stairs before she made her way into one of the bedrooms—probably Killian’s—and slammed that door loud enough for it to echo through the house as well.

I sat there, dazed. I glanced at Emmett, whose expression was impassive, and then at Killian, who had a wide, maniacal grin on his face as he crossed over to me and patted me on the shoulder.

“Omega says no, Alpha,” he said, smirking even wider down at me. “So figure out another way to show her you’re sorry.”

With that declaration, he sat down and dug into the breakfast I had made, and after a moment, Emmett followed suit.

I just sat there, my head still swimming from my aborted plan and Lilah’s scent lingering in my nose, and tried to figure out what my next move was, if Lilah was going to insist on me sticking around.