43. Lilah
43
Lilah
Tonight was the night. Tonight was the night.
I swallowed hard, my hand flexing in Killian’s as he walked us toward the little copse of trees at the edge of the property. I couldn’t stop myself from glancing over my shoulder at Emmett and Oliver, who were following closely behind.
The full moon shone overhead, and I could feel the magic of my shift tingling under my skin. It made me shiver with each bare-footed step we took towards the trees.
We weren’t werewolves; our shift didn’t rely on the moon. But pack runs under the light of the full moon were a great bonding opportunity, and...
Well, for me, it meant something even more, too. This was the first time I would be shifting since I’d returned from the rehab facility and hadn’t been able to control it.
I licked my lips, my toes flexing in the grass underneath my feet as the four of us stopped outside the trees. Killian and Emmett immediately began stripping, with Killian offering me a roguish wink as he took his clothes off, but I hesitated.
Oliver came up next to me, wrapping an arm around my waist and pulling me up close to him. He smiled down at me, and my heart fluttered a little as I offered him a small smile in return.
He’d been more affectionate with me since the day we’d spent together...and the night. It would have been a little startling if I hadn’t gotten to know Oliver fairly well over the past weeks—the nearly complete one-eighty of his entire attitude towards me was nothing less than I would have expected from him once he’d decided I was worthy of being trusted.
If I’d learned anything about Oliver, it was that he did things with his whole chest, and when he committed to something, he committed . He had done it when he had so soundly rejected me, and he was doing it again now that he’d decided he would make it up to me.
It was a heady sensation—his affection and attention—and I felt the weight of it now as he looked down at me, his fingers tracing little circles on my waist.
“You okay?” he asked softly, leaning down to nuzzle against the top of my head.
I leaned into him, the warmth of his support and his scent in my nose mixing the signals in my head yet again. Emotionally, I was ready for this—I was enjoying this. But physically and hormonally, my body was still struggling. My blood pressure still spiked at times, making my head spin, and it had taken almost thirty seconds to get my feet underneath me after Oliver had surprised me in the kitchen the other morning and nearly made me pass out.
He was trying, though, and so was I.
“I think so,” I said quietly. I knew the other two could hear me—one of the perks of wolf ears—but they were polite enough not to say anything as they finished stripping down and prepared for their shift.
Oliver nodded, his cheek rubbing against the top of my head. “We’ll all be right there for you, princess. I promise.”
His voice was low and fervent, and I knew he meant every word he said. I would have known that even without the sincerity pulsing through the growing bond in my chest, but it still helped.
I let out a low, shaky sigh, then nodded, pulling away from Oliver. “Okay.”
I quickly stripped down, a tingle of arousal flooding me when Oliver’s eyes darkened as he looked at me, and I could feel the weight of my other alphas’ attention on me, as well. When I finally got naked, I didn’t look away from Oliver as he stripped down in front of me, too, dropping his clothes in an unceremonious heap before stretching his arms up and over his head, entirely shameless in his nudity.
He was beautiful. And when I glanced over my shoulder and saw Emmett and Killian both waiting patiently for us, they were beautiful, too.
The way they all looked at me, their eyes raking down my form, made me feel powerful, beautiful and wanted. It made me feel like I could accomplish anything, no matter what my psyche said or told me.
A slow smile spread across my lips, and I looked up, closing my eyes as I lifted my face towards the moon. Though it was a warm night, a light breeze ruffled my hair and made goosebumps rise on my skin. I shivered, then opened my eyes to look at each of my alphas in turn.
I didn’t say anything, didn’t speak, didn’t do anything.
I just shifted, letting my wolf out to play for the first time in weeks.
The second my paws hit the ground, my alphas followed me, shifting as well. Killian pranced around, his wolf all long legs, green eyes, and dark fur, and he tossed back his head and howled before he walked over to me and bumped his head up against the side of mine. I snorted in a rough wolf laugh, and then I looked over at Oliver and Emmett as they approached me as well.
Oliver’s wolf was large and powerful, just like he was in human form, his fur sandy and his blue eyes so intense that they glowed in the moonlight. Emmett’s fur was chocolate, his eyes dark and quiet, and he looked at me with a soft knowing before he leaned forward and touched the tip of his wet nose to mine, lending me his strength in this moment that felt so vulnerable for me.
The three of them surrounded me, and I let out a low whine as I closed my eyes and ducked my head. Not because I didn’t like the attention, of course, but because everything inside me...was so much .
A tiny part of me wanted to panic—that innate, animal part of me that remembered what had happened the last time I was in this form. My limbs trembled with the effort it took to stay still, but more than that...
I wanted to be here. Being in this form with my alphas only proved it to me.
I chuffed and then danced away from the three of them, my paws light on the grass. In this form, I could feel everything so much more intensely, and when I lifted my head to sniff and let out a low howl, I could smell everything, too.
The sweetness of the grass, the damp earth, the soft floral scent of the flowers that dotted the ground under the trees, the distinct scents of my alphas behind me—all of it flooded my senses, and my wolf wanted more .
Without waiting for permission, I took off. As I ran, my paws were light against the ground, and I heard the three crashing bodies behind me, making no secret of their pursuit.
The chase thrilled me, and in the back of my mind—the tiny part of me that clung to my human consciousness—I mused that this would be a fun game...on two legs.
The thought of being chased by my alphas with the intent of being caught sent a shiver of excitement through me, and I tucked the thought aside for later consideration.
For now, we would just run.
My alphas followed me, and every now and then, I felt the gentle nip of sharp teeth against one of my feet. I glanced sharply over my shoulder the first time, only to be met with Killian’s wide, wolfy smirk as he nipped at my tail and then dodged away when I tried to get him back. I could feel his amusement radiating out of every hair on his body, and the exasperated way that Oliver shook his head as he kept pace with me only affirmed what I knew—Killian could be a right little shit when he wanted to.
Still, the lightheartedness of pack ...the comfort that I felt in being surrounded by my alphas right now, in this way, when I could have so easily fallen into another panic attack or a relapse...it was everything .
I tossed back my head and howled again as we burst through the other side of the copse of trees, running around in a little circle before I collapsed in the field. We had run around the paths through the trees a couple of times, and I couldn’t have said how much time had passed. All I knew was that the moon was a little lower in the sky, though the sky was far from brightening with morning light. We still had a good chunk of night to go, meaning we could run as far and as long as we wanted to without worrying about running into humans who might try to catch us.
Oliver came up beside me, bumping his head against my side and making me stumble with the playfully rough gesture. His tongue lolled out of his mouth as he looked at me, and I let out a bark of laughter as I nuzzled him back.
Emmett came up on my other side, pressing his face under my chin, and Killian lay down in front of me, resting his head on his paws as he looked up at me and panted. He looked about half a second away from rolling over and baring his belly, a thought that made a rush of power spin my head.
They were surrounding me, supporting me, and looking at me like I was the missing piece of the pack—which, if you believed most standard conceptions about omegas, was exactly true.
My stomach settled, and I lifted my head to howl. The sound pierced the air, and after a moment, three identical, deeper howls followed suit.
The four of us called our pack to the moon, and when we were done, I felt calm yet again.