Chapter 7 I Called Dibs
I CALLED DIBS
POPPY
There was no way I could have known. I replayed all the conversations in my brain and tried to figure out whether I missed a hint or a clue.
I realized that Austin had avoided the topic of Lily at dinner with Wolf and Tits.
Was that guilt? Meanwhile, I had an out-of-control sister to make peace with.
“I didn’t plan to sleep with your boyfriend. Honest. Please forgive me?”
“I’m not listening to you.” Lily grabbed one of my grocery totes and started filling the bag with food from the cupboards.
“I really am sorry. I didn’t know.” How was I supposed to? She was gone. I barely had time to talk with her before she passed out.
She stopped mid-pack and pinned me with her glare. “Oh, bullshit. He was right there at the construction site. I called dibs. You weren’t even interested in him for fuck’s sake. But you had to take him. I suppose that was easy, too. You always get the best stuff and fuck me over!”
“I—” Whatever I was going to say cut off because I suddenly realized she was right.
I had the mom who cared. I had the dad who loved me first. I had this house, and a job, and she had nothing.
And that was proven when she started rummaging through her dresser.
There were about four t-shirts in there.
The sole pair of jeans folded next to them was kid-sized. She threw those to the floor.
When she saw me in the doorway, she whipped me the bird. “I’m going home.”
“This is your home.”
“No, it’s not. It’s yours. Dad gave it to you. I got nothing. Not even a fucking car that works.”
“Where is your car?”
She muttered, “Broke down piece of shit.”
That didn’t answer my question. “Where is it? Maybe I can get it towed.”
“Fuck you.” She shoved me as she exited her room and grabbed my favorite leather coat. “I’m outta here. Good luck with your boyfriend. I hope he gave you crabs!”
I was done taking this shit. “If he gave me crabs, they’re from you!”
She whirled around, holding the doorknob to fire off a parting shot. “Say how you really feel. Tell me. I’m a slut, right? Lily, the slut. The evil sister. Well, fuck you. How does it feel to get nine inches up your cooch? Good? I hope you enjoyed my sloppy seconds. I hate you.”
Her exiting slammed door knocked a picture loose from the wall. It hit the floor, and the glass cracked into a million little shards. Like my heart.
The photo, one of Dad, Lily and I, was one of my favorites.
We were a family. Well, Dad and Lily were.
I was odd out. Back then, they both had honey-kissed fair hair.
Their eyes were blue-green. They had freckles, for crying out loud.
I wanted freckles. But instead, I looked like Mom.
That made me the one that got singled out either as “new mistress” or best friend, but never daughter or sister.
I threw out the frame and put the photo in my desk so it wouldn’t get ruined.
Then, I vacuumed the floor twice before I ate a pint of ice cream.
My phone rang, and I checked the number. It wasn’t Lily so I silenced it. Then I fiddled with the settings so the only call I would get was from her number. I didn’t want to talk to anyone. I wanted my sister back.
Twenty minutes later, two bikes pulled into my driveway. The rumble of their motors cut off and a few seconds later, someone pounded on my front door.
“Go away.”
“Popsicle, open the door. You don’t want me testing my new boots.
They say the composite toe in them is stronger than steel.
And fair warning, your door ain’t steel.
” Sprout’s tone was jovial, but there was an underlying thread of urgency and anger in it.
Usually, I only heard that when he got pissed off at a party.
Having it aimed at me made me feel guilty.
Well, guiltier.
I opened the door and promptly shut it on Sprout’s boot. Austin was with him.
“Ow.” Sprout pushed the door back open. “Warn a guy before you smash his foot in the door.”
“It wouldn’t have gotten smashed if you left that asshole at home.” I sent Austin a non-verbal fuck you with my middle finger.
“Poppy,” Sprout’s tone made my eyes narrow.
“Don’t Poppy me. I never want to see that son of a bitch again!”
Austin stood in the door. I picked up a hand-carved ahi figurine Mom sent me from Kaua?i to bash his head in with.
“Whoa.” Sprout grabbed it from me before I could toss it, and saved it from being shattered just like my family.
“Give me your gun.”
Sprout backed up, holding the carved fish in the air. “Hell no. No shooting your future baby daddy.”
Retch. Thank goodness for condoms. “I need that gun, Sprout.”
“Poppy, please just listen.”
I whirled on Austin’s too sensible and placating ass. “No. You listen. You are scum. A two-timing-bastard-biker asshole, who charmed his way not only into my pants but my sister’s. She’s eighteen. A baby!”
“Not technically…” Sprout started.
“Shut up.” Austin and I both stopped Sprout from saying something I’d have to murder him for.
“Why are you two here? I told him to leave and never come back.”
Sprout replied, “You missed work. That’s not like you.”
Oh shit. He was right. It was Monday. Fuck. My litany of swear words spewed out. “Give me a few, I’ll change and…” Then I’d have to work with Austin. Ugh. “Tell me you fired him?” I pointed at the cheating son of a bitch still hovering in the tiled section of my living room entrance.
“He has been with me the whole week. Except for last night when you two bumped uglies, but yeah. He couldn’t have fucked Lily. I swear it.” Sprout used the carved fish to make an X over his heart.
“You’re just covering for him. I know how bikers work.”
“Here.” He handed me the fish, then tugged on it. “You’re going to put this back on the table and not throw it at Smoke, right?”
“If he stays right there, maybe.”
“Damn bro.” Sprout’s eyes bugged out a little. “She’s pissed.”
Austin chewed on his lip. “Yeah.”
“Shut up. I don’t want to hear your voice. Bad enough having to look at you.” I wanted to slam the fish onto the sideboard but held my temper long enough to set it down gently. By the time I finished, Sprout was holding his phone out to me. “Danielle.”
I didn’t hear the phone ring, so he must have dialed her. I took the phone, because while Sprout was an old friend, he was also sometimes a big dumb ass. One smart thing he did was marry his wife, who was a sweetheart. “Hi, Danielle.”
“What’s going on?” she asked.
“Ask her where Smoke has been,” Sprout prompted.
I rolled my eyes. “It’s a big fight. You don’t need to get involved.”
“Oh no, what’s wrong? Do I need to call Ma?”
That was cute. She called Sprout’s mother the same thing Sprout did. And I’d never get that. I needed to focus. “No, maybe, but not yet. Where has Smoke been staying?”
“I don’t know about last night, is that what’s wrong? Did he sleep with one of the… girls?”
“Not exactly.”
“Is he okay? He didn’t come home with Sprout last night. I thought maybe…” her words trailed off with a squeaky non-verbal sound. The assumption would be, as a biker, and recently free, he’d be sewing his wild oats. I sent a glare at Austin.
“He’s fine. Where did he sleep the night before last?”
“Oh, in the maid’s quarters under the stairs. Sprout messed up the RV he was in and offered him a place until he can get on his feet. I …uh…”
“Let me guess, he never asked you first.”
She sighed. “It’s okay, really.”
No, it wasn’t. Danielle didn’t need big dumb bikers making decisions that intruded on her privacy like that.
Sprout was now also on my shit list. Bad enough, the house was overrun with bikers most weekends or whenever they got a bug up their ass and wanted to get insanely drunk at poor Danielle’s house.
But to have one sleeping there full time?
I covered the little microphone hole and told Sprout, “You’re an asshole. ”
He smiled like I’d just said something completely different. I turned back to the conversation at hand. “So, from when to when was this decision sprung on you.”
“Tuesday, through the night before last. His things are still here. Did you know everything he owns fits in one duffel bag?”
And everything Lily owned or wanted fit in a grocery bag. Damn it.
“Yeah, he hasn’t had much time to put down roots yet. Thank you for letting me bug you like this. I’m going to hand the phone back to Sprout now.” And I did, with a muttered, “You owe that woman.”
“I know. Hey babe…” He walked around Austin to take the conversation with his wife outside.
“I didn’t sleep with your sister.” Austin crossed his arms and waited for me to apologize. Which I should. But…
“She’s not that good of a liar. She honestly thinks she slept with you.
Who am I supposed to believe?” Not only that, but she nailed the dick size as well.
Quite a few men mistake six inches for nine, but I guarantee no woman would ever do that.
We’re smart enough to look at a ruler once in a while.
He bit his lip. “I know it looks bad.”
“Looks bad? Try…” I couldn’t find a word heinous enough to describe how awful this was. “She thinks I slept with you to take you away from her.”
“Really? Ew.”
“Stop it, you sound like Sprout.”
He shrugged. I picked up the fish again.
“Ten seconds… nine...” I cocked my arm back, ready to fling it at his head.
“Andrew.”
“What?”
“Remember my brother? My twin brother? Identical twin? The asshole?”
Oh God. It was a long time ago, but I remembered the jerky identical twin that followed Austin and Sprout around at parties. Until he discovered looking up skirts. More than once, he laid the blame on Austin for it. The fight went right out of me. “Let me guess, he knows you’re out?”
“That’s what Sprout thinks. Jackson says they sometimes notify the victim. So…”
I set the fish back where it belonged. “If this were a TV show, I would not believe this. What are the odds?”
“Yeah. Listen, I’m sorry.”
“For what?”
“For last night.”
Was he serious? I gave him my… well, that. And he was sorry? I needed something heavier than that damn fish. Maybe the pizza stone? No, that thing cost a fortune. My mixer was heavy. Also… expensive. Knives were out. I wanted to maim, not dismember.
Ignorant to my inner thoughts, Austin picked up his apology and continued. “I’m sorry it ended the way it did. We should have had a nice breakfast, kissed before work, I’d have ridden behind your car all the way to the job site, and after work today, taken you out for another ride.”
His voice was right behind me. “I told you not to move.”
A sound escaped him. I peered over my shoulder. Sure as shit, he’d snuck up on me while my back was turned. “I hate your brother.”
A laugh barked out of him. “Join the club.”
“I’m sorry.”
“For?”
Now it was my turn. “For not believing you.”
“Well, it looked awful. I think that was the point.”
“I’m sorry for yelling at you.”
“And?”
And what?
“The boots?”
Right. “I’m sorry I threw your boots at you.”
“Luckily you missed.” His grin was hesitant. “I accept the apologies and know why you were mad. You love your sister. It’s not hard to see you went full mama bear on me.”
“Why would he do this to you?”
Austin shrugged. “Maybe he didn’t do it to me on purpose. Maybe he’s just a fucking jerk who doesn’t want anyone coming to his house when he ghosts them?”
He was right. I didn’t even know I was going to sleep with Austin, so there’s no way Andrew could have orchestrated this.
Sprout popped his head in, “Hey, you two good? I’ve got to get to the job site.”
Austin spoke first. “We’re good.”
“I need to get ready.”
Sprout heard me. “You have the day off. And you,” he sighed as he addressed Austin, “I’ll tell the guys you’re seeing your parole officer. Be back in tomorrow. And no fucking. I want a ring on her finger before you guys start breeding like rabbits. No fucking way you’re beating me to a baby, dude.”
“No one said anything about a baby.” Austin yelled at Sprout’s retreat.
Austin was right. Absolutely not, at least not until I had my dream house built.
This place was too small for a family of more than two.
And a ring? Was he for real? We’d had sex once.
Okay, twice, but that didn’t make a relationship.
Besides, it wouldn’t work between us. Eventually, Lily would need me again. And then she’d see Austin and run.
“I can’t.”
“Poppy?”
I searched Austin’s eyes. “I love my sister. She hates you. I can’t … I can’t see you. Not like that.”
His face fell. And then it got darker. “I didn’t sleep with her. She needs help.”
“Which is me.”
Austin’s nostrils flared. “What’s that going to get you? A lifetime of loneliness? Poverty from always bailing her out? How long before she accuses you of something else you didn’t do. You didn’t sleep with her boyfriend. You didn’t, Poppy. You slept with me.”
“She truly thinks Andrew is you.”
He shut his mouth and thought hard. The creases between his eyebrows got deeper the longer he was silent.
“You’re right. We can’t do this. I can’t do this.
You picked me out of all the men in this town, why?
Because I’m a charity case like your father?
Because I’m like your sister, needing help?
I don’t need help from you. I don’t want help from you. ”
“That’s not how it was.” But it was. I’d built him up in my head and acted on it because he was a poor substitute to replace the love I had for my father, which I couldn’t give.
“And trying to send me out the back door? Fucking cold. I’m going to get a hit filed on my head because of a woman who—”
“Who what?”
Austin sucked in a breath. “You love too much. You love the wrong people. And whether you know it or not, you judge people, Poppy. Yeah. When you and your sister ganged up on me, I felt like I was on trial all over again. It didn’t matter what I said, I was guilty.
Both of you thought that. I was innocent, and you judged me guilty and sentenced me. Deemed me unworthy.”
“I’m sorry.” I would not cry. I wouldn’t.
“I know. But face it. I’m not worthy of you. I’ll never be. And you know it.” He scuffed his boot on the carpet and turned for the door. I should stop him, beg him to stay. But what would that serve? Sooner or later, I’d have to hurt him again. Even if I didn’t do it intentionally.
“I’m sorry.”
This time there was no slamming door or breaking glass.
And the oddest thing I discovered in that quiet click? A broken heart doesn’t shatter. It bleeds.