Lessons in Sin: A Student/Teacher Romance (Forbidden Love)

Chapter 22

The car ride home is silent.

I’m resting my head against the window watching the blue bleed into black as the moon rises in the sky. A warm hand touches my knee and I jump, the texts from earlier pushing thoughts of demons and sabotage into my drifting thoughts.

‘Hey jumpy, you okay?’

I nod but stay silent. If I talk, I think I might just break and tell him everything.

I mean, I could do that, but I know that Tristan would choose me over his job. He’s said as much before, and I can’t let that happen.

Even if it breaks my heart.

When we reach my dorm, hopefully safe from prying eyes since its three in the morning, Tristan laces his fingers with mine. ‘Hey? You sure you don’t want to stay with me?’ He wiggles his brows, ‘I could be your doctor.’

The broken pieces of my heart swell, pushing dread deep into my stomach.

Taking a breath, I look away from him. ‘I can’t do this anymore.’

I can’t see his face, but his hand freezes in mine. ‘What?’

I rip my hand from his. ‘I … I need to … I just can’t do this. Us.’

’Scarlett where is this coming from?’ His voice sounds pained, confused and the sound of Tristan, the man I love, yes love, sounding so pained makes whatever left of my heart shrivel up and die.

‘I need to focus on my dancing. You’re … you’re too much of a distraction.’

‘Look at me.’ He growls and I can’t ignore the command in his words.

His face is streaked in moonlight, pain etched down the graceful panes of his face. I try to look away, but he grips my chin, firm, unyielding. ’Scarlett, where is this coming from? Don’t think I don’t know when you’re lying to me.’

Shit. He knows me too well, he’ll never let this go without a fight. It warms me to know that I have someone like him, someone so smart, so all-consuming, fighting for me.

Steeling myself, I force ice into my eyes. ‘I don’t love you.’

‘What?’

‘You told me you loved me last night, before you fell asleep. I … I don’t feel the same.’

I swing open the door, but he’s too fast and by the time I’ve hopped out, he’s there - his eyes hard, pain glimmering in a sea of green.

‘Don’t do this Scarlett.’ He growls, pressing me against the closed car door. ‘Whatever happened, whatever you think you’re doing, just talk to me first.’

Tears threaten to fall, a knot building in my throat, but I ignore it, pushing it down until it settles in my stomach.

‘I. do not. love you. How is that hard to understand?’

‘I don’t believe you.’ His breath tickles my cheek, the intimacy of the moment so tainted by the words I’m saying. By what I’m being forced to say.

I clench my teeth, narrowing my eyes to slits and force out the words that need to be said. ‘Why exactly are you so sure I’m lying? Because I couldn’t love you. Getting to know you made me quite aware of that.’

He pushes away from me, the warmth, the happiness, the emotion all gone in a split second.

‘I see.’ He looks away, shadows hiding his face. His voice lowers to a whisper barely heard over the rustle of the leaves ‘You want to be a coward, that’s fine with me because the girl I love? She was never a coward. Goodbye Scarlett, I hope you’re satisfied.’

Jumping in his car, he doesn’t spare me another look before he’s driving away leaving me cold and alone.

And the most heart-breaking thing?

I swear that I could see something wet lining his eyes, the frost in his voice not deep enough to stop his tears from forming.

I barely make it to my room before I crumble, sobbing into my pillow - the room empty, Katie off somewhere, probably with Doug.

And that’s how I sleep, clutching a pillow soaked in my tears, the smell of Tristan still clinging to my shirt, the memory of him burning my shrivelled heart to ashes and embers.