Love and Other Goals (Love and Other #1)

Chapter 2

CHAPTER TWO

T he next morning, I crack my eye open to check the time. 10:47 a.m.

I prop on one elbow and look at the other beds. Teegan is still fast asleep, eye mask on, and mouth wide open. Amaya is nowhere to be seen, but that’s not too surprising considering she skipped out on the party last night. Something about important sorority president business.

Flopping back on my pillow, I cover a huge yawn with my elbow. Teegan and I were supervising underclassmen and driving girls back to the dorms until 3:00 a.m. last night. Or rather, this morning. I consider falling back asleep, but my growling stomach has other plans. Yawning again, I head down to the dining room.

The AOPi house is quieter than usual, but I’m sure a lot of the girls are still sleeping off hangovers or bid week exhaustion (or both). I pop a bagel in the toaster and drink a glass of water as I pour coffee into a mug with some half-and-half.

I start my mellow Taylor Swift playlist and sip my coffee as I wait for my bagel to toast. I mindlessly scroll through Instagram—lots of party photos from last night, different frat houses but same vibes. I’m tapping through Instagram stories when my heart skips a beat and my thumb pauses at the sight of Aaron Adams’ blue eyes gazing at me from the screen. I hold down to look more closely at the story he posted. He’s with two of his fraternity brothers from Omega Gamma, probably at their house party.

His blond hair looks a little lighter and his skin slightly bronzed after eight weeks at the beach. His muscular frame filling the photo makes it obvious he made time for the gym. I haven’t seen Aaron since returning to campus, and I feel a surge of regret at choosing not to spend the summer with him.

Every year, a group of students from Townsend and other Midwest universities spend eight weeks in Florida for an intensive Bible-learning experience hosted by Arrow, the Christian ministry I’ve been involved with since freshman year. We stay in run-down condos on the beach, living in small groups with an older student as the leader. It’s not a bad way to spend the summer, working at jobs in the city on the weekdays and spending the evenings and weekends doing Bible studies or group trainings to grow in our faith.

The first summer, Teegan, Amaya, and I were there as participants in the same small group, and then we got to be small group leaders after sophomore year. This year, Teegan and Amaya were top-tier leaders at Summer Project, in charge of overseeing the small group leaders, as was Aaron. I’d been offered a spot but turned it down to go home to Kansas City over the summer. I know that Kent and Rachel, the head staff members of Arrow, were disappointed with my decision, but I needed to go back home and support my mom.

She’s an immigration lawyer and works for the organization that is tasked with resettling refugees on the Kansas side of the KC metro area. With the fall of Afghanistan to the Taliban, they’ve seen a huge influx of Afghan families needing placement services in addition to the regular arrivals through the refugee resettlement program.

Every time I called home last year, I could hear the stress in my mom’s voice. She and her colleagues were all overworked (and underpaid), but they were determined to help these families. Because Congress had yet to pass an Afghan Adjustment Act to provide a pathway to permanency for the Afghan families arriving in the US, many of them needed help with asylum applications and other legal processes to ensure their future safety.

Considering I plan to become an immigration lawyer just like my mom, it was a no-brainer to go back home and help over the summer. Working alongside her gave me experience in the various legal proceedings involved in helping families navigate our complicated immigration system. Mom’s connections even provided me the opportunity to spend two weeks in Washington D.C. with an advocacy group, meeting with legislators about the plight of our Afghan allies.

It was life-altering. And will certainly be a positive thing to include in my application to UC Davis School of Law. So, I didn’t really regret my decision for a second. But that didn’t mean I wasn’t having a little bit of FOMO over not being in Florida with all my friends from Arrow, including Aaron.

The toaster pops, so I temporarily turn my phone off to carry my bagel and coffee to a table in the deserted dining room. Once settled, I click to the next photo on Aaron’s story. I frown. This time there’s a big group crowding around him in a selfie, including several girls—a couple I recognize from Arrow, but others I don’t.

Setting my phone down on the table, I take a long drink of my coffee. Did I make a mistake not going to Summer Project? Did my absence cause Aaron to forget about me?

I’ve had a massive crush on Aaron ever since our first Summer Project. I’d noticed him during our freshman year, but after eight weeks of close proximity to his sense of humor, his eagerness to grow in his faith, his outgoing antics, and his radiant smile, I was a total goner.

It just so happened that his flexible post-college options fit perfectly into my well-laid plans for my future. His uncle owns a marketing firm based in Kansas City with remote workers all over the country. Aaron is majoring in business and marketing with a sure-fire job opportunity waiting for him once he graduates. A sure-fire job that could conveniently be done from, say, California.

His pointed attention seemed to indicate that he also had feelings for me. We low-key flirted that first summer and throughout sophomore year. He would DM me random funny reels on Instagram that he thought would make me laugh, and he always made it a point to find me to talk at our weekly Arrow meetings or at the social after parties following the meetings.

It seemed obvious to Teegan, Amaya, and me that Aaron liked me as much as I liked him.

But he never asked me out.

As sophomores, I justified it to myself that we were just young. We had two years of college left and lots of growing to do, so it totally made sense to not start dating yet.

Last year as juniors, we were leading Bible studies of freshmen for Arrow, so we spent even more time together at leaders’ meetings. As an added bonus, his fraternity was paired with AOPi as homecoming partners. That meant our houses worked on everything together that fall, including a showcase performance with a skit and dance routine.

It was the only year I signed up to be part of the showcase. Conveniently, Aaron and I wound up as dance partners. Weeks of practice, having an excuse to dance together (even if it was mostly hip hop and swing moves), left me elated.

We killed it at the showcase, and when our routine ended, Aaron spun me around as the crowd cheered. He held me in a tight hug even after setting me down, until it was time to run off the floor. My smile was so wide, I thought my face might break from the strain.

When it came time to announce the winners, our team of AOPis and OGs was huddled together with our fingers crossed. Aaron stood right behind me, his hand loosely resting on my waist. I could feel his breath against my hair as we waited for the first-place announcement.

The announcer called our names, and we were all bear hugging and jumping so enthusiastically that we fell over in a heap. I’ll never forget the way Aaron’s arms reached out to break my fall and wrap around me in the midst of the chaos.

After the excitement calmed down, Aaron asked if he could drive me back to the AOPi house. This had to be the moment. He was finally going to ask me out on an official date. I even excitedly whispered it to Teegan and Amaya as I explained I wouldn’t be riding back with them.

But nope. No declarations of love or date requests. We just talked about the excitement of first place in showcase, our chances of winning homecoming overall, random small talk.

I came home to AOPi that night depressed and confused, swearing to Teegan and Amaya that I was done crushing on Aaron, that it was clearly all in my head and not in his.

While Amaya initially seemed to share my dose of cynicism, Teegan rekindled the hope in my heart. She reasoned that Aaron might be hearing from Kent and the other Arrow leaders that he should hold off starting a relationship until we were closer to graduation. There was an undercurrent in Arrow to focus your time in college on investing in friendships and growing your faith, as opposed to casually dating.

The logic was sound, so I latched back on to my crush and my hopes for a long-term future together. I replaced my misgivings about his lack of clarity with belief in his best intentions, trusting that his shiftiness was due to the environment we were in, not his true feelings.

But now, here we are, seniors. Just nine months away from the start of our futures. So now seems like the perfect time to decide if our future is together. Because if we don’t start dating ASAP, it’s going to be very difficult to stick to my plan of getting married next summer before we move to California.

What if I ruined it? Maybe by not being there this summer, Aaron realized he didn’t like me, or there was someone else he liked more.

Ughhhhhhhh. I rest my forehead on my arm on the table. I can’t let my mind catastrophize the situation with Aaron before I’ve even talked to him. At least I try to convince my brain of such.

I’ve been so lost in my thoughts that my coffee and bagel are cold. I get a fresh cup and grab a second mug to take to Teegan. Some Beefs time is exactly what I need to break out of this Aaron-induced funk.

Balancing the two coffee mugs in one hand, I turn the door knob to our room. Soft lamplight is on, which means Teegan must be awake. “Morning Sunshine,” I whisper as I close the door.

Teegan moans from her bed, where she’s at least removed her eye mask. “Ugh, I can tell I’m not a freshman anymore. I’m too old for this.”

“Here, ya old lady, I brought you caffeine,” I tell Teegan, handing her a mug. “Although with the amount of flavored creamer you use, it might be more sugar than caffeine.”

“Bless you,” Teegan says. She takes a long sip. “Sugar, caffeine, whatever will get my energy going this morning.”

I sit down at my desk, still feeling a little pensive. “What’s wrong with you?” Teegan asks before taking another sip. “You look troubled.”

That’s the thing about having best friends—they know you better than your ability to hide your thoughts. Then again, I never was a good poker player, so I might be easier to read than most.

“Oh, it’s nothing really,” I begin, picking at my fingernails. “Just scrolling Instagram and saw Aaron surrounded by a bunch of girls at OG’s party last night.”

Teegan immediately pulls up her phone. A few taps later, she sets it back down and says, “Beef, that’s nothing to worry about—just a typical group selfie at a typical frat party. I’m sure it didn’t mean anything to Aaron.”

“I know, I know, Teegs,” I groan. “I’m just a little worried that he may have, you know, moved on or forgotten me since I wasn’t at Summer Project. Eight weeks is a long time. Long enough for a college guy’s brain to get distracted, anyway.” I take another sip of my coffee, looking down at my cup and avoiding Teegan’s eyes. I don’t like how insecure I sound, but I can’t help it.

Teegan moves over to the desk chair next to mine, pulling her knees up to her chest. “Lana, I promise, I don’t think you have anything to worry about. Aaron asked about you, like, so many times all summer. ”

“He did?” I ask, my eyes darting up.

“Yes,” she confirms. “And did he not like all of your Instagram posts from this past week?”

“He did,” I say, looking up with a little more confidence.

Teegan squeezes my shoulder. “Just be patient, LaLa. You’ll see Aaron soon, and I’m sure every memory of how incredible and amazing you are will come flooding back. He’ll have no choice but to finally snatch you up.”

“You’re the best, Beef,” I tell her. “I’m sorry for being whiny. I want to hear about your summer—any gentlemen catch your eye?”

She gives me a sly smile. “Wellllll, there might be some stories to share. Too bad you’ll have to wait till Amaya is back for our group catch-up session.”

“What, NO! That’s not fair, Teegs, you can’t tease me like that!” I exclaim. She just laughs an evil queen cackle.

“Lucky for you, Amaya texted she’ll be back in fifteen minutes—just long enough for me to shower and rinse all the nasty frat party out of my hair and for you to sit in torturous suspense,” she calls over her shoulder, heading to the bathroom.

I open Aaron’s Instagram profile again and look back through his posts from the summer. Every smile, every goofy pose, every look of his crystal blue eyes make my heart beat a little faster.

This is our year, Aaron Adams. I hope you got the memo.