13. Allie
CHAPTER 13
Allie
I sat back, a wineglass between my fingers, and listened to the women around me chat. Teddy’s mom had left just a few minutes ago, claiming to be too old to stay up late with us. I truly loved getting to know her.
Thankfully, due to my profession, I was rather good at remembering names, but the challenge was remembering which woman was connected to which man, which was the main reason for me to do more listening than talking. The more they talked, the more connections I put in my brain. Of course Lacey was engaged to Spencer, who was Theo’s best friend and the quarterback of the team. I liked her a lot and could see us becoming good friends.
Then there was Brittanie, Isaiah’s wife. She was the spunky one of the group and made everyone laugh. I could not tell you what position he played, but I knew he was one of the stars on the team and broke a lot of records. It may have been something about a tight end, but that doesn’t seem like it makes sense. Who names a football position that?
Sydney was Xavier’s girlfriend. He was the kicker. Then there was Lisa, Marc’s wife. Marc was Theo’s best friend growing up. He did not play football. Devin, his other childhood best friend, did not have a significant other, nor did Briggs, the rookie on the team.
Lacey sat on one side of me and Bailey on the other. Having Bailey here was comforting. She always fit into whatever situation she was in. Not that I didn’t, because it was part of our training as professionals, but in this situation, I had a vested interest in being accepted. I worried about these people being annoyed at how much their lives were all going to blow up by being seen or associated with me, and she just got to be here as my friend.
We sat outside in the balmy Florida evening. No matter that it was November, it was almost warm enough to swim in the massive pool feet from us. A water feature made it sound like waves at the beach, and I loved it. Everything about Teddy’s house felt cozy despite it being a mansion. It felt right being here, and it wasn’t lost on me how quickly that happened. With always being on the road and in different locations for many reasons, home was a hard word. It was more a feeling than a place.
“You’re being quiet over there,” Sydney said, and the attention shifted to me. For the time we had been out here, it was nice to just blend in and soak in their conversation.
I smiled. “I’m just taking it all in. It’s really nice to be here with all of you. Thank you for including me.”
“I’m going to go there,” Brittanie said, indicating both me and Bailey. “I’ve been holding it in this whole time. I cannot believe you are both here right now, sitting with us. Like, we meet a lot of famous people being around the guys, but ...”
The girls laughed. “Go ahead,” Lacey said. “Freak out. Fangirl like I did when I went into her box at halftime. Then I got over it and realized they’re normal girls like the rest of us, just with a face everyone in the world knows.”
Brittanie looked at Sydney and then Lisa. All at the same time, they stood up and screamed, jumping up and down like they were in the front row of my concert. Bailey and I grinned at each other.
Within seconds, the back door opened, and Theo stepped out. All noise immediately stopped. “You okay?” He looked right at me like no one else was out here. Everyone watched as he walked up to me, his brow knit with concern. I wanted to ask him what could possibly have happened to me in his heavily guarded house with my security outside, but I didn’t because his immediate concern for my safety made me swoon.
“Yes,” I said. “We were just having a girl moment.” I looked over at them, now settled back in their seats like they were chastised by their parent. They watched our exchange in silence.
He leaned down over me in the chaise I lounged in and nuzzled my neck, his arms wrapping around my head gently. “You scared me,” he said, his voice low and heard only by me.
I leaned into him and reached my hand up to the side of his face. I breathed in his scent. There was just something so—manly—about the way he smelled. I also loved touching him. I had never dated anyone with facial hair before, and I was obsessed with it. Maybe I was just obsessed with him. “Just being silly with the girls.”
I felt his smile on my neck, and he stood up and ran his fingers through my hair. I fought the urge to groan. “Glad to hear it. You all take care of my girl. Have fun, but not too much fun.” He pulled my hair to tip my head back and pressed a kiss to my lips before returning to the house.
When the door closed, mayhem ensued.
“Holy shit,” Brittanie said. “That was so hot.” She fanned herself, and the rest of the girls laughed.
“That man is so gone for you,” Bailey said, and the rest of the girls nodded. Butterflies erupted in my stomach because I was just as gone for him. And with the nature of our relationship and the level of honesty we had with each other, I knew it wouldn’t be long until I told him just how deep I was in.
“ My girl? I have known Theo for many years, even when he was with the one that will not be named,” Lacey said, “and that Theo is a different man.”
“I have to agree. How long have you been talking?” Lisa asked.
“Since July,” I said. “Well, kind of. Officially talking since September.”
“Back when he went to your concert?”
I laughed. “Yes, but before the concert, my ex broke up with me while I was onstage rehearsing. I ran backstage and literally ran full steam into Theo. He helped me back to my dressing room. Later, he came for the concert and had a jersey and a note sent to my dressing room.”
“Wait. That guy Josiah you were with for five years dumped you on the opening night of your tour ? Over the phone? ” Brittanie’s mouth hung open.
I knew this was new for them because it wasn’t public knowledge. It helped that every person in this house had signed an NDA before tonight, but also, I knew they wouldn’t spread it. There was a girl code with the women.
“Yes. We broke up months before we actually broke the story to the public. It’s just how things are done in our world.” I looked over at Bailey and she nodded in agreement.
“What an asshole. Who does that?” Lisa said.
“We weren’t meant to be,” I said. “Was it shitty? Absolutely. We were together for a long time. But what I have come to realize since then is, the amount of time you know someone doesn’t matter; it’s the strength of your relationship. We were obviously not strong, but he wasn’t willing to do the work to be with me. I have learned a lot over my years of dating, and now I know exactly what I want and what things I will and will not accept in my partner. Josiah did me a favor.”
“I’d say,” Brittanie said, indicating inside, “that you found exactly what you want.”
I smiled, that feeling back in my stomach. “I will tell you all this,” I said, and they leaned forward, hanging on my every word. I didn’t feel like Allie Witt right now. I just felt like Mallorie—Mallie—a girl dishing about boys with her friends. “I have never felt the way I feel right now. Ever. This may sound corny—and maybe it is, but it’s also true. I’ve spent my life writing lyrics about love. For the first time, I feel like I am living those lyrics.”
The girls blinked at me for a few seconds, and I thought maybe I’d gone too far. I admitted too much. But then Brittanie sniffled, and then Sydney.
“That was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard,” Lacey said, dabbing her eyes. “Shit, Allie. This is why you’re so successful. You are damn good with words. Make sure you tell Theo that. For real.”
I sipped my wine, momentarily embarrassed that I let that much slip, but then I stopped myself from fixating on that. I was in a safe place here. I felt it. “I plan to. Oh, and you guys can call me Mallie if you want to.”
“Mallie?” Brittanie asked.
“My real name is Mallorie. That’s what my family calls me. But Theo came up with Mallie, and I like it. So, since we are friends now, you can call me that, too, if you want to.”
“You think of us as friends? Excuse me, I’m not done fangirling,” Sydney said, and the group laughed. “No, but seriously. Thank you for letting us into your world. I know it can’t be easy to trust people, and I think I speak for all of us when I say we appreciate it. If we can do anything to make any of this easier for you, please let us know.” The women all nodded, and I fought the urge to shed tears at how happy I felt at that moment.
“What do you call Theo?” Lacey asked.
I thought of my favorite thing about Theo—the way he wrapped himself around me and made me feel like not only the most important person in the world but the safest and most protected. “Teddy.”
“Aw, like his T-Bear nickname,” Brittanie said. “You guys are too cute. It’s so nice to see him like this. That bitch did such a number on him. He loved her, but none of us were sold. Turns out, we were right.”
“Yeah, we both have had some doozies,” I said.
“Where are you headed next on tour?” Sydney asked. “I’d love to see a show of yours sometime.”
“Atlanta,” I said. “Not too bad travel-wise. I play there for two weekends and then come home around Christmas. I think I’m going to attempt to catch the game on Christmas if my security team can get it together.”
“I’m sure that is a whole ordeal,” Lacey said.
I laughed. “I am a whole production, but it’s necessary, unfortunately. I wish I could feel safe everywhere, but there are a lot of unhinged people out there who think I’m married to them.”
“Seriously?” Brittanie’s eyes widened.
“Sadly, yes,” I said. “Most people are just nosy or want autographs and pictures. But all it takes is one crazy, and there have been many that try to get into my house, or my car, or run at me when I’m walking somewhere. My security literally carries emergency medical equipment.” I looked around at their shocked faces. “Sorry, that may be too much for our first gathering.”
“No,” Sydney said. “Don’t be sorry.” She indicated the other women. “I’m sure we’re all thinking the same thing—that it is terrible that you have to deal with that.” They nodded in agreement.
“Thanks. It’s part of the life I have, and I wouldn’t give up the rest because of that. I have a great security team, and most of the time, I feel incredibly safe. I just can’t ever let my guard down because it could literally mean the difference between life and death.”
“I’m sure it makes Theo furious to even think about someone trying to get to you,” Lacey said.
“It does. He actually met with my security team to hear about their procedures. When he’s with me, he wants to take the lead. When he heard about the incidents that have happened over the years, I thought his eyes were going to bug out of his head and he was going to run through a wall or something.”
Brittanie sighed. “These men of ours are extremely protective, but I can definitely see that Theo would take that to another level with the life you have. It’s just his nature to protect people.”
“On a happier note, I’ll share my schedule with you guys, and you let me know when you want to come to a show and I’ll make it happen.”
“Really?” Sydney said. “Thank you! I would love to see your show.”
“When is Theo going to a show?” Lacey asked. “I’m sure whenever he can make it work is when I can go and bring Spencer. Maybe we can all go.”
“Teddy says that it depends on the playoff schedule and if it looks like they’ll make it to the championship. I can’t even believe I know this information. A few months ago, I couldn’t tell you a single thing about football.” We all laughed. “But there are two weeks off in between playoff games where he—and I guess the rest of the guys—could possibly travel then. The only major downside to that is that I’m in London, so it’s a lot of travel time.”
“London!” Brittanie yelled. “I’ve always wanted to go to London! Group trip to see Mallie in London!”
“YES!” they chorused, and I couldn’t help but smile. They made me feel so wanted, and despite us talking about them coming across the pond to my sold-out show, normal.
“So, do we hope for or against a championship?” I asked, and the girls gasped.
“We don’t speak of that,” Brittanie whispered, “it’s bad luck.”
“Angel,” Teddy whispered in my ear. His large hand splayed on my stomach, our bodies flush with each other’s.
After everyone left, we immediately went to the bedroom and took the time we didn’t take in the bathroom earlier to be happy we were with each other again. We also apparently took a little snooze because he just woke me up. I wasn’t sure which thing I liked better, him calling me Mallie or him calling me angel. But hearing angel in that sexy I-just-woke-up-and-have-sex-on-the-brain voice with his beard tickling my ear and his giant dick pressed into my ass? Yeah. Straight to the lady parts.
“Teddy,” I said back, lacing my fingers with his. He lifted them and kissed my hand before settling our hands on my naked body. I wriggled back against him. I could not ever get enough of sex with him. I was twenty-nine years old. I’d had plenty of sex in my life, and I loved it. But it was a damn good thing I never knew it could be like this because it didn’t matter how many times now I’d had sex with Teddy. Every time was better than the time before, and it was seriously like our bodies were made for each other from day one. It also helped that both of our love languages were touch, because I didn’t want a single bit of space between us ever, and he agreed.
“I didn’t get to tell you this before, but thank you. Thank you for coming to my game today, enduring the media spectacle and letting me claim that you’re mine. I have had a lot of moments in my career when I have felt like I’ve made it, but seeing you up in that box tonight? Seeing you around the dinner table with my family and friends? I’ve never felt that feeling before.”
I turned my body so I faced him, my heart pounding. I tilted my face up so I could see him, and he looked down at me. The room was dark except for a light in his bathroom shining into the room, enough that we could see each other. I kissed him softly, our tongues finding each other’s. I wrapped my leg around him and pulled him close to me, channeling every feeling I had into it. It made no sense. I never thought I’d be ready this fast after someone I thought I loved crushed me into a million pieces.
But then Teddy happened, and all of a sudden, nothing—and no one—else mattered.
“Today was one of the best days of my life,” I said, running my hand along his biceps to his hand. Our fingers twined together and I squeezed. “The media circus is nothing I’m not used to, so that doesn’t even register on today’s scale. Do you know what was the best? Seeing you do what you love. Being there with your family and friends and being accepted. Feeling like just a girl seeing her boyfriend play his game. And tonight? After the game? Around the table with them? Outside by the pool with the girls? My heart felt like it may explode with happiness. I’ve never felt so comfortable with people as fast as I did them. They really went out of their way to make me feel included.”
Teddy smiled a slow, Cheshire cat smile that brought his dimples out. His eyes sparkled in the dim light, and the slight creases around his eyes showed me his pleasure with what I said. “Mallie. Hearing the word boyfriend out of your mouth does something to me.”
My heart rate increased with the tone of his voice. He smoothed my hair back, his thumb caressing my cheek as he stared down at me. My breathing intensified, and I had this feeling I couldn’t quite describe in my stomach.
“We have both had pasts,” he continued. “Ones where we thought the person we were with was going to be forever, only to find out in the worst possible way that they weren’t the right one for us. We have had heartbreak and pain and wondered why we couldn’t find what seemed so easy for others. We are both successful in our careers but have struggled with finding someone that we could connect to on all levels of our lives. I have struggled with how to voice this to you because I definitely do not have a way with words like you. I’ve also struggled with the timing of it. Because it has been my one goal in all of this to not scare you away or do something that will make you regret giving me a chance. I’m thankful every single day for getting the chance to know you and for you to trust me. I’m old enough to know what I want, and I don’t want to waste time wondering if the time is right.”
He took a deep breath, and I knew. I knew by the look in his eyes. By the way his hand shook a little as he continued to caress my cheek and by the timbre of his voice.
He pressed his lips to mine briefly, unspoken feelings passing between us like we were opening the floodgates and holding nothing back anymore.
“Mallorie, I just can’t stop from telling you. I have wanted to tell you for longer than I probably should admit.”
I swore my heart stopped beating and my lungs ceased to take in oxygen, waiting for what he said next, even though I felt it throughout my entire body.
“I forced myself to wait,” he said, “until I knew you were ready for us to be ‘out there’ with the world, but I’ve known that I’ve loved you for a while. I have never been more sure about anything in my life. I don’t need more time or some certain milestone to happen. There is nothing I want more than to show you and tell you that every single day. I want it all. I want the good, the bad, and the in-between. I want the successes, the challenges and the road bumps of life. I. Love. You.”
Tears filled my eyes and I nodded, the lump in my throat keeping me from responding immediately. “Teddy,” I said, my voice cracking. “You should really stop saying you aren’t good with words,” I said, “because you are . You’re everything to me. Despite me thinking I wasn’t ready and that I couldn’t possibly love someone again so quickly, I do. I love you. I love you more desperately than I have ever loved anyone in my life. You have shown me what true love is. I have written about it my entire life but never really knew what any of that meant until you. I have never felt this way about anyone. Ever.”
He leaned his forehead against mine, and we breathed each other in. I allowed the emotion welling in my eyes to spill over. As the tears tracked down my face, our gazes met again. “I told the girls tonight I had never felt this way about anyone before, and I mean it. I have also known that I’ve loved you for quite a while. I just couldn’t believe it was possible.”
“You told the girls that?” His voice was thick with emotion.
“I did. I told them that I’ve spent my life writing lyrics about love, and for the first time, I finally feel like I’m living it. They told me to make sure I told you that, and so, there you go.” We looked at each other for a moment, processing all that hung around us. I felt ... lighter. Free. And so fucking loved. He loved me. Me. And I knew without a shadow of a doubt that it wasn’t a line. I could feel it. Our connection was so strong. Reinforced by hours and hours of heart-to-heart conversations and the honesty we’d promised each other from the beginning. I knew that he was for real. He rolled us so I was lying on his chest, and he stroked my hair. I wrapped my leg around his and traced his pecs with my fingers. This was literal heaven right here. I never wanted to leave.
“Did you really say it back?” he asked a few moments later. “Am I dreaming again?” I lifted my head and rested my chin on his chest. He smiled at me.
“I love you,” I said again. Tears filled my eyes without warning and slid down my cheeks, splashing on his chest. My chest heaved with the emotion swirling inside me, and I couldn’t stop it if I tried.
“Hey,” he said. “Why the tears?” He wiped under my eyes with his thumbs, his gentle caress making my tears flow faster. “Angel, talk to me.”
I sniffled, trying but failing to control the emotion welling up in me. “I-I don’t want to leave you,” I cried. I felt ridiculous, but it was true. I loved him. He loved me. It felt so unfair that we had to be away from each other for so long. “I know it’s ridiculous?—”
“Angel,” he interrupted. “It is not ridiculous.” He reached down and pulled me on up so our faces were lined up. I loved how strong this man was. “I love you so fucking much, Mallie, and I wish we never had to leave each other again, but we both know we wouldn’t be happy that way. We are who we are because of the passion we have for our careers. But that doesn’t mean I don’t wish I could keep you in this little bubble forever. Now let me show you how much I love and cherish you and turn that sadness into euphoria.”