Malone's Fate (Haven, Texas Book 14)

Chapter 28

Abeat of silence followed after Alec left the room. Lilac peeked over at Tanner, whose jaw was clenched as he stared down at his hands.

“I’m sorry, Tanner.”

“What?” His gaze shot up to her. “Why are you apologizing?”

“I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did yesterday. It’s part of the reason I couldn’t sleep. I kept thinking about how I pushed you away for defending me. By rights, you should still hate me, yet you keep looking out for me. All my life, I wanted someone to defend me, and you did that. And how do I reward you? By telling you to go. I . . . I didn’t mean it. I don’t w-want you to g-go. I think I k-keep thinking that you’ll w-work out I’m not w-worth it. I mean, we hardly know each other. Why would you want this?” She waved her hand through the air over her body.

He leaned forward, his face intent as he took hold of her hand. “First of all, do not speak about yourself like that. Why wouldn’t I want you? You are smart and funny. Loyal and beautiful. The way you take care of your friends . . . fuck, Lilac, I would be damn lucky to have you as mine.”

A sob escaped her, tears dripping down her cheeks. “I’m messed up, Tanner. I’ve got s-so many problems. I never should have come here, never should have brought those problems with me.”

“Hey, if you hadn’t come here, I would be even more upset with you, understand?”

“You wouldn’t have known, though. You could have m-moved on with your life.”

He shook his head. “I’ve had this gaping hole inside of me ever since you took off, Lilac. I’ve been a grumpy asshole. Ask any of my brothers. Out of all of them, I’m the most easygoing and fun, but I haven’t felt like myself since I lost you.”

“How can you ever forgive me?” she asked.

“Because I know you have your reasons for what you did. And you’re going to tell me them so I can handle them for you.”

She let out a small, watery laugh. “Do you realize how arrogant you sound?”

“I do?” He gave her a pleased look. “Good. That’s what I was going for.”

Lilac groaned. What was she going to do with him? He was terrible.

Before she could say anything else, the door to her room opened and a doctor and nurse stepped in.

Nerves filled her as she remembered what had happened.

She’d collapsed.

God. What if something was really wrong? What was she going to do? And what about the cost of this room and all of her care? There was no way she was letting Tanner pay for it.

But she was grateful that he’d thought to give her his last name to use. Sure, a hospital database should be private. There was no way that Stefan should have access to it. But she knew what sort of resources her brother had. He’d found them before. She just hoped to God, he wouldn’t find them this time.

The doctor was an attractive woman with dark hair. She smiled at Lilac. “Hello, Mrs. Malone.”

Jeez. She liked the sound of that a little too much.

Focus, Lilac.

“I’m Doctor Ann Martin and this is Abby.” She gestured at the friendly-looking, blonde nurse.

Abby gave her a small wave.

“I’m glad to see you’re awake and looking better.”

“Um, yeah. Do you know why I fainted?” she asked.

Doctor Martin glanced over at Tanner. “Would you like to have this conversation in private?”

“I’m her husband!” Tanner protested.

Abby snorted, then put her hand over her mouth. “Sorry.”

“Yes. Her husband,” Doctor Martin said, looking doubtful. “Mrs. Malone? What would you prefer?”

“Please call me Lilac. And . . .” She should kick him out, but he’d done so much for her. And the truth was that she was tired of pushing him away. She wanted him close. “I want Tanner to stay please.”

“Very well. When you were brought into the hospital, your heartrate and blood pressure were very low. We took some blood and ran some tests. We’re still waiting on the full results, but it wouldn’t surprise me if you were low in iron as well as some other vitamins. You were also very dehydrated which is why we put the drip in.”

“Okay.” None of that sounded terrible, right? “Was it due to low blood pressure that I fainted?”

“That’s the most likely scenario. However, we want to run a few more tests. We also checked your blood sugar, and it was low.”

“Oh.”

The doctor’s face softened. “Lilac, when was the last time you ate?”

She swallowed heavily. “Um. Well, I . . . I had some dinner last night at Dirty Delights. Wait, no, that was the night before. Yesterday . . .”

Shit. Did she eat anything? “It was an eventful day.”

“Do you often skip meals?” the doctor asked.

“It’s not . . . I’m not . . . I just forget. When I get stressed, my stomach ties up in knots and I can’t eat. I don’t know. I just haven’t had an appetite.”

It sounded so lame, but she didn’t know how else to explain it.

Did they think she’d deliberately not eaten?

Her gaze went to Tanner, and he gave her a small smile, squeezing her hand.

“It’s all right, Lilac,” the doctor said in a kind voice. “I understand. I get the same way. My emotions are definitely tied to my stomach. When I’m stressed or working too much, I forget to eat as well. I keep some protein drinks in the staff fridge to keep me going. And keeping hydrated is really important.”

“Yes. You’re right.” She didn’t know if the doctor was telling her the truth or just making that all up, but it made her feel better. As though she wasn’t the only one struggling with eating and anxiety.

“Talking to someone can help too.”

Lilac tensed again.

“It’s just something to think about, okay? We all need someone to talk to at times.”

“I’ve been seeing a psychologist,” Abby offered. “I had something bad happen to me as a teenager and I repressed it. It . . . it came out recently, so I’ve been seeing this really nice lady in Haven.”

“Molly?” Tanner asked.

“Yep. She’s awesome. Not judgy or bossy or anything like that.”

“I’m not sure I can talk about my past with a stranger,” Lilac said, feeling ill at the thought.

“Sometimes, it doesn’t need to be a stranger.” The doctor patted her leg. “Now, we want to keep you here while we do some more tests and wait for the full blood results. We also need to continue to monitor your heart rate and get you rehydrated.”

“Will . . . can I go home by tomorrow morning? I have work tomorrow night,” she said.

“I think it would be best if you took some time off. At least a few days but a week would be ideal,” the doctor told her.

“I can’t miss work.” That just wasn’t a possibility.

“We’ll work that out,” Tanner said.

What was to work out? But she didn’t say anything else as she knew the doctor had to be busy.

“Thanks, Doctor,” she said.

“I’d also like you to talk to our nutritionist. She might have some ideas about things you could eat that won’t hurt your stomach. And we’ll do an ultrasound to ensure nothing else is going on.”

“All right.”

More money. Perfect.

Abby fussed over her for a bit, then told her she’d arrange some lunch for her.

They were already trying to feed her. But then again, she had to start eating, or she was going to get into a worse state.

Fuck. What a mess.

Tanner squeezed her hand once they were gone.

“You don’t have to stay, you know,” she said.

Urgh. Why did she say that? She didn’t want to be here alone.

“I’m not going anywhere until you do,” Tanner told her firmly.

“Um, I don’t think they’ll let you stay here overnight.”

“You’ll be surprised what they’ll let me do.” He winked at her.

“Your charm doesn’t work on everyone,” she informed him.

He gasped, placing his hand on his chest as he sat back in his chair. “Lilac, you wound me.”

“Your ego will protect you, I’m sure,” she replied dryly.

“This is true.” He grinned. “But I’m staying the night. No arguments.”

Abby knocked before walking into the room carrying a tray. “Doctor Martin said to bring you one of her protein drinks to see if you liked them.”

Okay, maybe the doctor had been telling the truth after all. That helped settle her nerves even further.

“Someone will collect that tray later,” Abby told her. “You hit the buzzer if you need me, okay?”

“All right. Thank you.” She smiled at the other woman.

“Welcome, Lilac. Oh, don’t try going to the bathroom by yourself just yet. Doctor Martin is worried you might get dizzy and collapse. So, call for me, okay?”

Great. Just what she needed. Someone to escort her to the bathroom. How had things gotten to this?

“I’ll help her,” Tanner assured Abby.

Abby eyed him. “All right. I guess you won’t let her fall over and hit her head.”

“Of course not!” Tanner looked offended.

Before Lilac could offer her opinion, Abby left.

“What if I don’t want you to take me to the bathroom?” she asked him huffily.

“Guess I could arrange a bed pan.”

“Tanner!”

He just grinned at her. Urgh, he was terrible. His phone started beeping with messages. Pulling it out, he sighed before putting it face down on the nightstand.

“Um, shouldn’t you read those? Answer them?”

“Eh, it’s just my brothers. Some from my sisters-in-law. I’ll answer them when you’re napping.”

“I just woke up.”

“They’ll wait.”

“Tanner,” she chided.

“What? They’re just being nosy. Wanting to come to the hospital to meet the new Mrs. Tanner Malone.”

“Tanner! You didn’t tell them that we got married!”

He grinned. “Nah, but I could.”

She rubbed her hand over her face. “I can’t believe this is happening. I was so stupid!”

“Okay, you need to stop doing that.” He drew her hand away from her face. “You were not stupid.”

“I was, Tanner! I pushed you away when I really didn’t want you to go. I regretted it so much, and I was worried that you wouldn’t want anything to do with me anymore. My brain wouldn’t shut up. I . . . I couldn’t sleep, so I thought it was a good idea to go running at three in the morning to clear my head. What if I’d died? What then?”

“Do not say things like that,” he told her darkly. “You are not going to die.”

“I was such an idiot.”

“One more time,” he said in a low stern voice.

“What?” She gave him a startled look. What was he talking about?

“You call yourself an idiot or stupid one more time and we’re gonna have problems.”

She reared back. “You’ll leave me?”

Tanner’s eyes widened. “No, baby. Christ, no. I’m not leaving you.”

“You should,” she said bitterly. “I bring nothing but problems wherever I go.”

“That was your third strike.”

Um. What? “I didn’t say stupid or idiot.”

“No, but you basically called yourself a problem and that’s the same thing.”

“Is not.”

“You really want to argue over this?” he asked.

“Well, that depends on what strike three gets me.”

“Nothing at the moment. But eventually, it’s going to get you a hot ass. We’ll add it to the punishment you’ve got coming for endangering yourself.”