15. Chapter 15 I Haven’t Changed My Mind
Chapter 15: I Haven’t Changed My Mind
J ENNY
Jenny watched Wade and Suzanne while her tablemates talked. She somehow found the chattiest group of geeks. In most circumstances, she enjoyed meeting new people. Right now, though, she just wanted to know what was going on with Suzanne and Wade.
Wade smiled at her periodically, which helped. Gah, they’d only been together for a matter of hours, and she was already insecure about their relationship. To be fair, though, she’d never had someone like Suzanne waiting in the wings before.
Generally, she liked how she looked and felt good about herself, but it was hard when compared to Suzanne. The other woman was gorgeous and intelligent.
It was a good thing Suzanne had already left In-Tech before Jenny brought Chad to the holiday party. There was no telling how that meeting might have gone, since Chad would have tried to impress her with his family’s money within seconds of meeting her.
“Are you okay?” the guy next to her asked.
Jenny pasted a smile on her face.
“Of course. Just thinking about something at work.”
“None of that here. We’re supposed to be getting to know each other.”
The rest of their table cheered, and Jenny focused on their light-hearted conviviality. She still occasionally snuck glances at Wade and Suzanne, but time passed much faster when she concentrated on her tablemates rather than her new boyfriend and his ex.
“My girlfriend is so upset I’m here for Valentine’s Day, but I have a surprise planned for her when we get back,” one of the guys said.
“Oh, really? Do you have something scheduled for tomorrow, a phone call or delivery, so she doesn’t think you forgot?” the woman next to him asked.
Jenny’s mind blanked. Oh, no, was she supposed to do something for Wade for Valentine’s Day? Would he think she expected something from him?
They had just started dating, had barely kissed. They could just ignore the day altogether, right? Or would he expect to get physical since it was a romantic holiday, and they were in a romantic relationship?
She was interested in exploring a physical relationship with the handsome geek, and not just because she couldn’t get Gloria’s comments about geeks out of her mind. But she didn’t want to feel pressured by him or society’s expectations. She didn’t want him to think he had to do anything, either.
Neither of them needed any pressure with things so new. Maybe she should tell him she was glad they were spending time together away from their usual environment since the Hallmark holiday made people act out of character.
Satisfied with her plan, she returned to the animated conversation at her table. Jenny was startled when a subdued Suzanne appeared next to her. Up close, she could see that the woman in front of her looked subtly different than the glossy, picture-perfect woman she met before.
Suzanne smiled at her awkwardly. That was also new. Previously, the confident woman either ignored her or pretended she wasn’t worth remembering.
“Hi, Jenny. Sorry to interrupt, but I thought you might want to switch places with me so you could have dinner with Wade. And, um, I’m sorry for my behavior. It won’t happen again. You have my word for whatever that’s worth.”
Jenny was uncertain what to do. When she glanced at Wade, though, his beaming smile convinced her to take Suzanne up on her offer.
“Okay, that sounds good. Are we allowed to switch places, though? I thought the whole point was we were supposed to get to know new people.”
Suzanne smiled at her sadly. “You’re a good person, aren’t you? I’m glad; he deserves someone good. Don’t screw it up like I did. He doesn’t realize how amazing he is, but I hope you do.” Suzanne looked away and cleared her throat.
“But, yes, it’s okay for us to switch,” Suzanne said. “I don’t know anyone at this table yet, and I’m sure there are people you haven’t met at Wade’s table, so we’ll still fulfill the goal. If anybody gives you any trouble, though, I’ll take full responsibility for the swap.”
Before Jenny’s eyes, Suzanne’s personality transformed. She became a gregarious, talkative person. In moments, she had the table’s full attention. Jenny might have felt inconsequential that no one noticed her leave, but she was so eager to find out about Wade and Suzanne’s conversation that she didn’t care.
When she reached Wade, he stood and helped her to a seat. They spent the next two hours laughing and enjoying dinner. It was easily the best date of her life, despite sharing a table and conversation with six other people. The food was amazing, and she was glad she chose this restaurant from the sign-up list.
Wade assured her they no longer had anything to worry about where Suzanne was concerned. Jenny wasn’t so sure she believed it, but he seemed confident, so she relaxed.
Occasionally, she met Suzanne’s eyes across the restaurant. The other woman clearly had the rest of the table in her thrall, but it seemed like a character she donned. For the first time, Jenny wanted to know more about Suzanne and the situations that shaped her.
Her interest in the other woman flew out of her head when Wade threaded his fingers with hers as he spoke with one of the other people at their table. She couldn’t wait to be alone with him. Maybe they didn’t need to talk about Valentine’s Day after all.
JENNY
Jenny’s cheeks hurt from laughing so hard, but she wouldn’t change it for anything. Wade entertained her and the other denizens of their table with funny tales of co-workers and clients.
His stories were hilarious but not at the expense of other people. He used self-deprecating humor occasionally, but he mostly framed his stories so that the events unfolded in a funny way without anyone being the butt of the joke.
Jenny hadn’t realized how much Chad’s mean humor affected her until she contrasted it with Wade. Wade found enjoyment in laughing at things, too, but he looked for the ridiculous in situations, not in hurting people with a sharp tongue and praising his own cleverness.
She relaxed more as the evening progressed, the situation with Suzanne nearly forgotten. They consumed copious amounts of delicious Tex-Mex food, and Jenny had a margarita she swore was the most perfect margarita ever made. The others at the table turned out to be laid back and funny once they all got past the awkwardness of dining with strangers.
As they prepared to leave after an unexpectedly fun evening, Suzanne approached their table. Jenny stiffened in defense, but Wade laid a comforting hand across her back. Already, they were so in tune.
“Don’t worry; I’m not here to cause any trouble,” Suzanne announced. “I forgot my coat, and it wasn’t a pretense. If it wasn’t so damned cold outside, I would have left without it. It’d be just my luck the bus would break down, or we’d be stuck outside if I did that, though.”
Jenny had noticed the winter jacket earlier but hadn’t paid much attention to it. Suzanne grabbed it and left without saying another word.
“That was weird, right?” Jenny asked Wade.
“Kind of. When we get back to our suite, I’ll tell you everything.”
Jenny could hardly wait until they got back to the hotel. They boarded the bus with their table mates. Several of their fellow diners enjoyed a generous number of libations, and the ride back to the hotel was loud and rambunctious. Jenny happily snuggled into Wade’s embrace and let the sounds wash over her.
However, the closer they got to the hotel, the more nervous she became. She still wasn’t sure what he would expect from her. Yes, she found him attractive, but she wasn’t comfortable getting naked with him so soon. Yet she wasn’t opposed to it. How could she expect him to know what she wanted if she didn’t know herself?
“Are you okay?” he asked quietly to avoid drawing attention to her.
Jenny’s smile flashed. Before she could reassure him that everything was fine, he added, “And don’t say you’re fine. I can feel your tension, you know?”
She huffed out a laugh. Once again, he beat her to the punch.
“Are you worried about us?” He gestured between the two of them. “And my expectations now that we’re going to a hotel room together?”
Jenny widened her eyes. “How did you know?”
His laughter rippled across her back.
“Because I’m worried about your expectations.”
“You are?”
“Of course, I am. You’re a beautiful woman who could have her pick of men, yet you chose me. Part of me wants to show you exactly how a geek can get the job done, but it’s too soon. I want more than just a conference hookup.”
Jenny gaped at him. He was too good to be true. This had to be a line to convince her to throw caution to the wind and jump into bed with him. If it was, it was working on her.
“Shit. We’re here. We’ll have to come back to this conversation in a bit, assuming I haven’t scared you off.”
He gave her a nervous smile. Jenny realized with surprise that her lack of response was making him insecure. It was a heady feeling to have the power, and she rushed to reassure him.
“No, I mean yes. I mean, no, you haven’t scared me off, and yes, I’d like to talk about it later. I won’t be able to think about anything else.”
She giggled, and Wade relaxed imperceptibly. Since her attention was so focused on him, she noticed it, but she kept it to herself. Selfishly, she felt better knowing he was nervous and uncertain, too. That appealed to her far more than brash confidence or, worse, indifference.
“Do you want to head to our suite, or would you prefer to hang out in the bar area with the others?” Wade asked.
Jenny took a deep breath, grabbed him by the hand, and led him in the direction of the bank of elevators.
She blushed as she said, “I’d like to learn what happened with Suzanne earlier, but then I want to spend more time getting to know you better.”
All of Jenny’s bravery disappeared once they entered the elevator. She stole a glance at Wade out of the corner of her eye as they ascended. They both fidgeted while they waited. Silence rang out between them, the chatter of other passengers the only background.
“This is ridiculous—“ he started just as she began to speak.
“We don’t have to—“ she began.
They both laughed uncomfortably and looked at each other. Wade grinned broadly before he flourished his hand at her in a dramatic gesture.
“Ladies first,” he said.
She squinched up her face at him, and he laughed again.
“Fine,” she huffed. “We don’t have to change things if it’s too weird.”
“Damn, I shouldn’t have let you go first,” he said as he shook his head in mock disappointment. At her affronted gasp, he chuckled. “That’s not happening.”
Her legitimate indignation fell away as he spoke further.
“I’m nervous,” he said, “but that’s it. Because I want everything to be perfect. I haven’t changed my mind. Have you?”
Before she could answer, the elevator stopped on the floor before theirs. Wade moved closer to hear her response over the increase in volume from other people shuffling in or out of the elevator.
“No,” she said in a shy tone. “I haven’t changed my mind. I’m nervous, too.”
Wade beamed at her and held out his hand. She’d already noticed he was big on touch and handholding. Jenny reached out, and he tangled their fingers. Her smile grew when he tugged her closer.
“That’s better,” he said softly.
She smiled and laughed more around Wade than she could remember doing in a long time. When things were still new with past boyfriends, she didn’t remember it being like this. Despite everything else, peace filled her as Wade held her hand.
Once they arrived on their floor, he led her to their suite. They held hands the entire way. Everything felt different than the last time they’d entered the suite. They hung up their coats in silence, and she wondered what he was thinking.
She still wasn’t sure if she was ready for sex, but she wanted to fool around. But first, they needed to deal with the Suzanne situation.
“Can I get you something to drink?” Wade asked.
He peered into the mini fridge and looked at her.
“We’ve got tap water, bottled water, a few choices of soda, one of those ridiculously tiny bottles of wine. I think there might be an import beer behind the twelve varieties of juice. Oh, and some left-over stocking stuffer liquors, too.”
“Cold water, please.”
Jenny asked for a bottle of water from the fridge. She liked that he didn’t lead with the alcohol, as if to imply she needed it for courage. Likewise, he didn’t ignore it or assume the wine would make her uncomfortable after her recent adventure in over-indulgence.
In moments, he returned with chilled water for each of them. Jenny was seated on the couch, and he chose the spot right next to her. She liked that, too. Once she got the details about what went on with Suzanne, if she still felt amorous, it’d be a breeze to jump on him, literally and figuratively.
Wade filled her in on his conversation with Suzanne, and it sent her reeling.
“Oh wow. I can’t tell if I should hate her or pity her. But it’s less because of her actions and more because I’m so angry and frustrated and feel sorry for her and want to adopt her.”
Wade burst out laughing. “Only you would have that reaction.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” she asked with an arch look.
“It means you are far too good for me, but I hope I can convince you to stick around, anyway.”