Chapter 34
Thirty-Four
Conor
I’m not sure how we got into this position, but I’m not complaining.
Eloise is straddling my lap, all sexy in my button-down shirt from earlier tonight. My hands splay on the outsides of her thighs, and damn, her skin is so soft.
“More?” she asks, offering me a bite of the piece of pizza she’s eating.
I suggested room service, but she said she was dying for pizza.
I open my mouth, and she holds it out, watching me take a bite. Then she takes a bite. I can’t take my eyes off of her, the smile on her face, her infectious energy. It’s as if someone transported me somewhere I never knew existed, let alone knew I wanted to spend all my time there.
“I like this,” I admit.
She continues eating her pizza, mumbling, “What?” around a mouthful of food, covering her mouth with her hand while she chews.
“Being here… with you.” I’m still hesitant to confess all the feelings running through me because I’m afraid to scare her off.
She kisses me briefly and sits back up.
I’m wearing only a pair of shorts, and my dick is very aware of the lack of fabric between us, but I’ve already had her twice. Since we left the dinner before the actual meal, our stomachs were growling after we finished our second round. My dick twitches just thinking about how she rode me, and I finally got to enjoy her tits in my hands and mouth.
“I like it too.” She drops the crust in the box and grabs the waters I took out of the mini fridge when the pizza arrived. “I’ve never had this before.”
My fingers dip under my shirt, running along her hips. “What?”
I throw the question her way, curious and anxious to hear her response.
“It’s just… easy. Being with you takes no effort.”
It’s the best thing I’ve ever heard. “That’s exactly it, but I’m sure you had something like this with Tristan. At least in the beginning.” I hate that my insecurities are making themselves known, and I’m sure she can probably see right through me.
She places her water bottle on the table after she’s done taking a drink. “I never felt comfortable like this. Like I could just be myself without fear of judgment.” She shrugs. “The world he was born into isn’t easy. I’m pretty sure you’re judged from the moment you come out of the womb. I saw it in my dad. It would come out in little ways. If my dad picked me up from my mom’s, he’d drop little comments like how my mom couldn’t braid my hair properly, or that the dress I was wearing wouldn’t do, so he’d stop and buy me one on the way to wherever we were going. I once overhead my grandma telling someone at their country club I was deciding between Stanford and Yale.” She laughs. “I was never getting into an Ivy League school.”
“Lots of pressure to conform, to not detour from the norm.” I understand a little of what she’s saying.
“Exactly.” She pauses. “From the time we got together, I constantly second-guessed what I wore, my makeup, and would go over the conversations I had with his family and friends in my head for days afterward.”
Now that I can’t imagine.
“But with you…” She shakes her head and looks at me as though she can hardly believe it. “It’s like I’ve known you forever. You take the good and the bad that comes with me.”
I fiddle with the bottom button of my shirt, watching my fingers. “I battled with whether I could really be feeling what I thought I was when we first met because of the instant connection I felt with you. I was worried it was lust, or like you worried that maybe it was just because you were something I couldn’t have. But I think you just nailed it. It’s the familiarity. The instant I sat down next to you in that VIP lounge, I didn’t want to be anywhere else.”
“So, you wouldn’t have helped some other random girl get her friend to her hotel room?” She raises her eyebrows, and I undo a button on the shirt.
“I was desperate to stay with you, but didn’t know what the hell I expected. Then we talked and…”
“You figured out I wasn’t the happiest?”
I nod, shame sweeping in. “I’m really sorry.” I undo another button, and she doesn’t stop me, so I continue on. Will this thirst for her ever be quenched?
“For what?”
I look into her eyes. “For stopping your wedding. I was an asshole for doing that. And then the fight…”
She brings her hands to my face and stares into my eyes. “It’s in the past.”
“But still, your family…”
“You met my mom, she was relieved. She never wanted me with Tristan anyway. And the only people who care is everyone on my dad’s side. My mom’s side has never liked my dad’s side and vice versa.” She kisses me quickly and pulls away too soon. “What you did is kind of romantic in a way.”
“That’s what my drunken self thought when the idea came to me, then the chipmunks spurred me on, but still, I had this whole vision of me running through the doors, and it would be like it is in the movies…you’d turn to me and run down the aisle into my arms. The fight and you running off after wasn’t part of my vision.”
She giggles and kisses me again, but I place my hand on the back of her head to keep her there. I slip my tongue into her mouth, and she grinds her heat on my hardening dick. Fuck, she’s everything I didn’t know I needed.
Minutes later, she closes the kiss. “How about a bath?”
“You all slippery and wet? I’m game.” I grip the tails of my shirt, inching up and holding each side tightly. “But first you need to be naked.” I tug and pull, the shirt bursting open and buttons flying all over the room, pinging off the tables and floor.
“Show-off.” She shakes her head with a coy smile.
“I always wanted to do that.” I wrap her arms around my neck. “Hold on tight.” Standing, I hold her to my chest, her nipples poking my pecs.
“Oh, I like this.” She kisses my cheek first, then her mouth finds my earlobe, and she nibbles.
“If I make it through this bath without my cock inside you, I should get a goddamn prize.”
She giggles, her laughter like music to my fucking ears. “I love it when you talk like that.”
“How?”
“Like you can’t get enough of me. Like every time you see me, you want me.”
I walk us into the bathroom, place her on the counter, and start the water in the bath. “I do.”
Once the water is warm, I add the stopper and go back over to Eloise while we wait for the water to fill the tub. Fifteen minutes later, we’re both in the tub, her back to my chest, my arms wrapped around her.
“Can I ask you something?” She leans her head on my shoulder and turns her head to face mine. She looks unsure.
“Anything.” I want her to know she can always ask or talk to me about anything.
“When I mentioned the pressure to be someone you aren’t, you sounded like maybe you understood what I was talking about.” She circles her head and grabs my hands, moving our joined fingers through the water.
I kiss her temple and gather my thoughts. “In a different way than you were referring to, but similar in a sense. There have been times in my life that I felt I had to be a certain type of person because I was an athlete. Or people thought certain things about me, and I was always trying to prove them wrong. Like the sign, the Nest, outside the condo and the women who hang around. They’re in love with someone I’m not.”
“What do you think they expect?”
“Most just want to say they slept with me. The sex could be shitty, and they’d still brag to their friends that I was the best lay they’ve ever had. It’s not me they want. It’s my reputation, my profession.”
Her fingers tighten in mine. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. Most guys would love to be in my position. And I can’t say there wasn’t a time when I took advantage of it, but I’m not that guy anymore. Don’t ever tell Kyleigh this, but I think seeing her and Rowan together finally helped make that click for me.”
“They are happy.” She leans her body into mine and wraps our arms around her.
“Sickeningly so.”
She giggles.
“I never really thought I’d be able to have a relationship while I was playing. The schedule is grueling, the time away from home isn’t ideal, but they make it look so fucking easy. Henry struggled with it too, and I hate to say this because I love the guy, but I don’t want to end up like Tweetie.”
“A playboy?”
My head moves side to side. “Yeah, that for sure. But there’s more. He’s covering something up and dealing with it in a shitty way. He’s going to have to retire soon and what will he be retiring to? To sit around and talk about the good ol’ days in the league? Maybe he’ll get a coaching job, but…” It’s so hard to explain when she doesn’t know Tweetie that well. I don’t want to be trashing him—he’s a great guy. Fuck, he let me live with him when I first got to town and had nowhere to go. That’s, like, best friend shit.
“But what?”
I sigh. “Will that be satisfying? Hockey has been my entire life for as long as I can remember. The goals changed over the years, but it always had to do with hockey—get on the top travel team, get a scholarship at a top college, get into the league, get the best agent, get the endorsements, win the Cup. When it’s all over, I don’t want to walk away from the game to an empty house. I want to walk into the arms of the woman I love and have her whisper to me that we’re going to start the next chapter of our lives. Maybe we’ll have a few kids at our feet too.”
She sighs and kisses my jaw. “I like that vision.”
“Me too.”
I don’t say that I hope it’s her. That when I picture it, I see her with open arms and our kids hugging our legs. I don’t want to scare her, but fuck, I’m not sure I can slow down this train. I’m in deep when it comes to her and barreling headfirst into love.