Chapter 28
CHAPTER
TWENTY-EIGHT
MILES
“Your phone is vibrating.” Lainey taps the front pocket of my backpack.
I feel numb after what we just overheard. I drop my backpack to the ground and move with robotic stiffness to retrieve my phone from the pocket. The call has ended but an alert pops up to let me know that Annie has left a voicemail on my phone.
I push play and hold the phone up to my ear.
“Hey, I’m not sure when you’re heading home today and if I’m supposed to get a ride with you or find my own ride. Uh… No rush or anything. Let me know whenever and uh, if I don’t hear from you I can go hang with my mom at Luca’s tonight.”
Her voice is laced with nervous energy despite how confident she sounded a few minutes ago as she cut Cameron Hartford down to size.
Blue has no idea that Lainey and I happened to be nearby when that conversation started. I tracked down my cousin in the hopes of picking her brain more about Annie. Little did I know that Annie herself would be revealing more than I bargained for as Lainey and I stood hidden behind a bookshelf only a few feet away.
“Was that Annie?” Lainey asks as I lower the phone and suck in a deep breath.
“Yeah.”
Lainey tsks and then lowers her voice. “Does she sound really upset? She sounded pretty badass finally putting that asshole in his place. I bet she’s freaking out now that she walked away though.”
Instead of answering Lainey, I lean around the corner of the bookcase and scan for any sight of Cameron. I reassure myself he’s walking away in the opposite direction from where Blue fled before I give my cousin my attention again.
“Of course she’s upset. She should never have had to defend herself to him.” Something else is bothering me though. “I don’t understand why the hell she would keep something like that from me though.” Hell, I accused her of being a gold digger myself at one point.
Lainey shrugs noncommittally.
“You knew?” I guess immediately. That kind of family revelation would be a huge deal if Lainey didn’t know. Like her mother, Lainey loves knowing everything about everything. Information is currency to them.
“Yeah… My mom connected the dots when I first introduced Annie. I never mentioned anything to Annie about knowing though because she doesn’t flaunt the connection.” Lainey’s mouth twists sadly before she adds, “And then once we got to know each other better it became clear Annie doesn’t have a relationship with any of that family. I think it’s sad. The last thing I would want to do is make her talk about any of that when she doesn’t want to.”
Lainey narrows her eyes and glares toward the direction where Annie and Cameron had their conversation—her ire directed at the latter—even though neither of them are standing there anymore.
“When she first came to tutoring with me, I thought she might be a gold digger,” I admit. I want to hear my shame out loud.
On this one, I don’t deserve a pass for being an asshole. That’s for damn sure.
This is what I get for being every bit the judgemental asshole Luca regularly accuses me of being. He warned me that would come back to haunt me some time and now I’m proving he’s right. I made an ass of myself by expecting the worst of Annie.
At least I started to come to my senses recently. I managed to see her for who she is much sooner than Cameron did.
His fucking loss.
“Don’t you think hiding a big part of your identity like that is kind of a weird secret to keep though? Even without having a real relationship with any of them, the family name would carry serious weight around a place like this.” I can’t help but feel like Blue did herself a disservice keeping this secret for so long.
Lainey scoffs. “Seriously? Do you not see the irony of that statement?”
I stare blankly at her.
“You have your own big secret.” Lainey puts her hands on her hips and steps closer to whisper low enough to not risk being overheard. “Your author alter-ego is a huge part of your identity.”
“No one would even care about that." I wave her off immediately. I don’t want to talk about that here. Or anywhere.
Lainey shrugs. “I don’t know, I think people might like you a lot more if they knew you were capable of writing such light-hearted and lovable characters.” She smiles teasingly.
I feel queasy.
“Let’s not talk about this.” I swing my head side to side to make sure no one has overheard her. My cozy mystery pen name is a well-kept secret because I don’t risk talking about the books out in public.
I already nearly pissed my pants when Blue picked up a copy of one of my books in the local authors' section at the bookstore. What kind of idiot admits to their real hometown in the author bio for a secret pen name? This guy right here.
And Luca threw me under the bus apparently by confirming to Blue that M. Duffy is related to our family. I wasn’t exactly subtle in my reaction to that.
I’m surprised she hasn’t already guessed the connection.
“I’m just saying,” Lainey starts in again, “that you don’t have room to judge anyone for keeping secrets of your own. Though I guess there’s not much to keep a secret these days since you haven’t published anything in a while.”
My entire body tenses. “Are you serious?”
She sounds so much like Uncle Luca poking at me that there’s no doubt in my mind the two of them have been talking. They should both just mind their own business. Fucking hell.
"Why are you and Uncle Luca sitting around gossiping about my writing gig? Can’t you find something more interesting to talk about together?”
Lainey waves me off with an eye roll. “No one is sitting around gossiping about you for fun. I happen to like your books, Miles. I’m hoping you’ll write more of them so that I have more of them to read.”
“Whatever.” Great now we’re entering uncomfortable compliment territory.
Yet another reason I keep the stupid pen name a secret.
Lainey sighs dramatically and nudges her book cart with her foot. I swear I rarely see her without that thing in tow. One of these days she needs to make her way around campus doing something besides class or work-study.
For someone who seems whimsical and fun, I don’t see her have nearly enough actual fun.
“Hey, I just remembered… Why were you looking for me before we got caught up in eavesdropping?” Lainey looks at me expectantly as if I’m going to give her the satisfaction of pumping her for information about her friend now.
“Don’t worry about it,” I say as I grab my backpack to throw over my shoulder and back away from Lainey slowly.
“What? No, tell me!” She starts to follow me until she remembers she has to keep her book cart close and turns back. This is my chance.
“See you around, Lainey,” I call out to her quietly as I pick up my pace knowing she won’t be able to keep up while she’s pulling the cart.
As soon as she realizes what I’m doing she forgets she’s in a library and calls after me, “Miles!”
I chuckle as I hear her huff before I disappear around a corner.
I don’t slow down until I’m outside. Instead of heading toward the center of campus, I round the side of the library and find a quiet place to stop beside a giant tree. I lean against the trunk in a way that gives me privacy at least for the moment.
I just need a minute to think.
“What is this woman doing to me?” I bite out under my breath, tone thick with derision.
How did I get so over-invested in my fake girlfriend? This idea was supposed to spare me the attention of Brynne and the anger of my uncle. I wasn’t supposed to be worrying about Blue or getting used to having her around.
I need to clear my head—something I have no hope of doing if I drive her home and sit there all evening watching her get comfortable in my private space.
I let her in my home and now she’s gotten in my head.
There’s no way I can to avoid temptation without avoiding Blue altogether. I slip my phone out of my pocket and craft a short text.
Sorry, can’t give you a ride. You have a key to my place. Be home late.
Blue might decide to go to Luca’s still even though I’m reminding her she has a key to let herself into my apartment. I hope she won’t do that because it’s only going to piss me off. I’m kind of setting her up by not telling her I want her to go to my place.
After all my bullshit treating her like she was playing games when we met, I’m the only one that seems to be playing games here.
I like Annie. She managed to get under my skin. As much as I would like to pretend dating her is about a mutually beneficial arrangement, the truth is I just want to fucking date her. She’s smart and gorgeous. Well-read. Quirky in a very endearing way.
I don’t need to clear my head to decide what I want to do about her. I need to clear my head and think about one very important question:
Do I even deserve the chance to keep someone like Blue?