My Ellie (The Perfectly Paired #1)

Chapter 18

Colton

I’m just leaving the stables after a long trail ride with the boys when my phone starts buzzing. Wyatt’s contact photo pops up on the screen and I press the little green button to accept the video call.

“Hey, what’s up?” I ask as the call connects.

“Nothing much, just thought you might want to know that I just got myself a date to prom.”

I stop dead in my tracks, “You’re kidding!” I shout, immediately checking my surroundings.

“No, sir!” He shouts back before breaking out into excited laughter.

“Oh man,” I rest my hand on the back of my neck as I continue on my way back to the coach house. “How did—I’m going to need a play-by-play man, I am so pumped for you.”

“I just asked her, well first I asked if she wanted to go for ice cream and then—you know, I just asked.” He’s grinning so hard I his cheeks must be burning.

“I am so happy for you, Wyatt, did you happen to mention that you’ve been in love with her for the past ten years or did that not come up?”

“Funnily enough, I kept that little detail to myself, figured it could wait.” We both erupt into laughter, and it feels like we’re just hanging out at home, doing ranch chores or driving to the store in my truck.

Until I realize we’re not.

I’m far from home and I’m heading back to an empty room where I’ll sit and feel a crippling combination of guilt, homesickness and regret.

Guilt, because it feels like I should be there, I’m missing out on key moments in Wyatt’s life, and I hate it. Homesickness because, well, while I like England and so many of the people I’ve met here are great, it’s definitely not home. Regret, because I wish I didn’t have to take a job halfway around the world to bank roll the ranch and all the projects and repairs that are waiting for me when I get home.

Damn, my depression meds—which I most definitely took right after breakfast—are clearly taking a vacation day.

“Earth to Colton,” Wyatt waves into the phone camera as my attention snaps back to him. “Did you hear me? Me and the guys are going shopping for tuxes tomorrow.”

“Oh, that’s great. I’ll send some money over for that and transportation—ask her what she wants to pull up in, limo, hummer, horse and carriage—”

“Got it.” He laughs, “I’ll ask her, but hey I’ve got to go. Got an assignment that has to be finished by nine AM.”

“Got it,” I say a little hoarsely, “Let me know if you need anything, anything at all. I’ll send that money over.” I hate that the money feels like a cheap way to soothe the fact that I’m not there, that it’s all I can really offer right now.

“I will, love you, Colt.”

We end the call, and I stand outside the entrance to the coach house, staring down at my phone as Wyatt’s contact photo disappears and the screen goes blank.

“Are you coming in?” A soft voice asks, and I look up to find Ellie standing in the doorway. “I saw you standing out here, everything alright? Forget how to use the door?” The smile on her face falters a little as she takes in my own sorry expression, but it returns as she asks, “I, uh, don’t suppose you want to share some banana bread and watch some dressage routines from the 1990s with me? Chef made a new batch at lunch, and I really don’t feel like watching this frankly prehistoric tape on my own.”

She makes it sound as if I’d be doing her a favor and I want to take her face in my hands and kiss her for it—platonically of course...

“I’ll grab the banana bread.” I say with a smile before stepping in through the glass door. In the kitchen I find that Chef has made two more loaves and a dozen muffins. I take a photo and immediately send it to the group chat.

Colton: Meemaw you’re going to have to step your game up.

Meemaw: Are those muffins?! Wyatt, help me get my muffin tins out of that tall cabinet next to the fridge.

Wyatt: Meemaw, it’s almost 8 pm .

Meemaw: I asked you to help me boy, not tell me the time.

The ache in my chest feels more bearable as I enter the common room with two bowls of warm banana bread and ice cream.

Ellie’s eyes light up and she pats the seat next to her on the brown leather couch. We have the large room mostly to ourselves, with the exception of a coaching assistant who sits at the far end of the room, typing so quickly on her laptop that I think I see small plumes of smoke rising from her hands.

“How did practice go today?” I ask, sitting down and handing her a warm bowl.

“It was... not so great,” She turns the TV on and mutes the volume with a grimace. She turns to check that the furiously typing assistant isn’t listening before whispering, “Remi was struggling with his passages, those things,” She points to the TV and we watch the old, flickering film as a horse starts to... skip? I ain’t never seen nothing like it. “He never usually struggles with them, I think it was mostly my fault—my cues probably weren’t strong enough and—” She rubs a hand down her face, “Well, I got out of training early, don’t make that face—it’s not a good thing. I... I lied, I said Remi might have a loose shoe or a muscle tear.”

“Is Remi ok?” I wonder if the pained expression on her face is because there might actually be something wrong with the horse she cares so deeply about .

“He’s fine,” She looks down at her bowl, moving the spoon around absentmindedly as she shakes her head, “I said he felt a little off, like he might be lame or something and got dismissed early. I know it was wrong but... In the moment it’s like I just didn’t care, like I would do anything to not have to spend another second in that ring. I felt guilty for a passing moment, but as soon as I stepped foot outside of that arena it was like a ton of bricks was lifted from me.”

She’s speaking as if she’s waited years to get these words off her chest, and I’m more than happy to listen if it means she might feel even a tiny bit better about herself.

“God,” She breathes, looking up at the TV, “What is wrong with me?”

“I think you just needed a break, Ellie.” I know the question was rhetorical, but I felt the need to answer anyway. “Maybe this was your mind’s way of telling you, they have a funny—slightly annoying—way of doing that sometimes. Don’t be so hard on yourself, you’ve got plenty of time. Summer isn’t nearly over yet.”

She turns her head to me and sits in silence for a moment, and just when I think she might open her mouth to argue or tell me that I’m wrong, she looks back down at her bowl and nods gently.

“Now, are you gonna eat that or do I have to tattle on you to Meemaw?” I drain the dregs of my bowl into my mouth and lower it just in time to catch her smiling at me.

The noise of the front door opening and closing draws our attention to the archway that leads into the common room just as Sanya and the twins walk past. Sanya spots us and immediately changes her course from the kitchen to the armchair next to the couch as I place my empty bowl on the coffee table.

“Anything good on?” She jokes, jerking her head to the grainy footage on screen before plopping herself down into the armchair.

“Sadly not,” Ellie says, spooning a hefty amount of banana bread and ice cream into her mouth with a moan before her expression turns serious. “Oh, I’ve got to tell you something,” She leans towards Sanya, and I find myself doing the same, “Mother will flay the skin from my bones if she finds out so do me a favor and keep this to yourself.” She turns to me, “You too cowboy,” Sanya and I exchange glances before both nodding. “An Olympic scout is coming within the next two weeks.” Her voice is barely above a whisper, “I don’t even know if Coach knows yet, and I’ve been sworn to secrecy—which seems to be going very well. I should have sent you a text as soon as I found out, but I knew there was a chance Rory might see it and tell the entire estate.”

Sanya’s fingertips are pressing into her lips, her legs are jostling, and it looks like she might scream.

“Don’t scream.” Ellie warns before eating another spoonful .

Sanya’s fingertips drift down to her chin as she hisses, “This is so exciting . It’s really happening! Oh my god, and so soon! I thought they would come towards the end of training camp.”

Ellie makes a quieter motion with her hands, earning a silent apology from Sanya.

I open my mouth to congratulate them on whatever this might mean, when the twins sidle in through the archway.

The three of us lean back, focusing on anything but each other as the twins walk past us.

Sanya waits all of thirty seconds before standing, “I’ve got to grab something to eat and... do some laundry.” She winks before bending to kiss Ellie on the cheek. Ellie and I mutter our own goodbyes as she practically skips from the room.

“You don’t have to stay and watch this with me if you don’t want to.” Ellie winces with a smile, finishing the very last bite of her bowl before setting it atop of mine on the coffee table. “This probably isn’t what you had planned for your afternoon.” She reaches for her notebook and flips it open before dragging her eyes to the screen.

“Would you believe me if I told you this is actually far better than what I had planned for the afternoon?” I settle back into the couch cushions, and we spend the next few hours watching tape that was recorded just after I was born. I ask questions, crack jokes and stare in awe as the horses on the TV prance and shimmy across the screen. Ellie is more than happy to give me answers and let me down gently by telling me that they, sadly, have not managed to teach the horses how to do a cartwheel or a back flip just yet.

The guilt, homesickness and regret looming in the back of my mind stay there, like a darkness kept at bay by a blinding, beautiful light.