New Year with the Cartel (Nightshade Wolves #8)

Chapter 13

Gustall

I leaned against the cold wall of the clinic's bathroom, trying to steady my breathing as I stared at the doctor's results in my trembling hands. Pregnant. The word seemed to pulse on the paper, mocking my attempts to deny its reality.

I thought I had been careful, that I had taken all the necessary precautions, but in the end, what I feared happened. He claimed me in such a way I could never reverse it.

My first instinct was to call Fendwyr, though, but I stopped myself before reaching for my phone. It was in that moment I realized I didn't know what I was going to say.

His vision was still fresh in my mind, along with the dark intensity in his eyes when he spoke about the necklace and his plans. He was focused, driven by something that transcended lifetimes. How would this news affect that? I had no idea, though I suspected it wouldn't change his attitude much. He already knew I was his.

The memory of how possessive he was, the way he'd gripped my neck while talking about our past lives, made me shiver. Fendwyr was already protective to the point of suffocation— what would he be like if he knew I was carrying his child? But I already knew the answer. It would be much more amplified.

"Mister?" The doctor's voice came through the door. "Are you alright?"

"Yes," I called back, quickly folding the paper and shoving it into my pocket. "Just needed a moment."

When I emerged, she gave me a look that spoke at least 1000 words. "I understand this is overwhelming news, especially given your... unique situation." She'd been recommended by other omegas as someone who didn't ask too many questions about mate status or pack affiliations. I knew she was trustworthy, but it still didn't make this easier. "However, you need to start prenatal care as soon as possible. Your hormone levels are quite high, suggesting a strong alpha father."

Of course they were. Everything about Fendwyr was intense, why would his child be any different?

"I'll be careful," I promised, accepting the prescriptions she handed me. Vitamins, supplements—all things I'd need to hide from Fendwyr's sharp eyes. However, was it going to be enough? I couldn't help but think it wasn't going to be.

"And the father?" She pressed. "Will you be informing him?" She cared so much. I could feel it was genuine, but still wished she hadn't asked.

Then, I thought about Fendwyr's current state—obsessed with recovering the necklace, making plans that seemed to grow more dangerous by the day. Just this morning, he'd been on the phone discussing something about rival territories and necessary 'cleanup operations.' I didn't even want to know what that was about, but I knew I would, eventually. It wasn't something I could control.

"Not yet," I said. "It's complicated." And she didn't have to know, I thought again.

She frowned but nodded. "Just remember, omega pregnancies can be delicate, especially in the early stages. You'll need support."

Support. The word echoed hollowly as I left the clinic, pulling my coat tighter against the cold. The irony wasn't lost on me—I had finally found my fated mate, someone who was supposedly destined to be my perfect match across time itself, and I couldn't even tell him about our child.

And she was right. I knew I needed his support, but it wasn't easy to ask for it. Nothing with him ever was.

My phone buzzed: a text from Fendwyr. "Where are you?"

Three simple words that made my heart race. He was already tracking my movements, growing suspicious of any time I spent away from him. How long could I really keep this secret? Not much longer, I answered myself.

"Had to pick up some medication for headaches," I typed back, hating how easily the lie flowed from my fingers. But then again, I wouldn't be where I was if I weren't good at it. "On my way back now."

His response was immediate: "I'll send someone to pick you up."

"No need," I replied. "I'm already walking. The fresh air helps."

There was a long pause before his next message appeared: "Don't make me wait too long, little omega. We have matters to discuss."

I closed my eyes, one hand moving to my still-flat stomach. The child within was barely more than a concept, yet already it was changing everything. Fendwyr needed to focus on whatever dangerous game he was playing with rival cartels and ancient artifacts. He needed his omega to be strong, capable, and ready to help with his plans—not compromised by pregnancy. But there was nothing I could do about that. I wouldn't opt for an abortion.

And for now, at least, this secret was mine to bear alone.

It was a few days later. Not much had changed. Things were about the same.

I wasn't in the same place. I was in a different one. It used to be a source of tranquility, but now, not anymore. My life had changed drastically. It would never be the same again.

I pressed my forehead against the cool bathroom tile, trying to steady my breathing after another bout of morning sickness. The tile felt colder than usual somehow.

The sound of running water would hopefully mask any noise from the meeting room next door, where Fendwyr was interrogating someone about the necklace's whereabouts. He was obsessed with it. I wanted to know the truth too, but I didn't think I'd ever do the things he'd been doing.

"Tell me again," Fendwyr's voice carried through the wall, deadly calm in a way that made my skin crawl, "about the dealer's new contact."

A whimper. Then: "I swear, I only heard rumors—"

A crash, followed by a cry of pain. I flinched, one hand moving to my stomach as though something was going to hurt my baby. Six weeks along, according to the doctor, and already this child was changing how I viewed everything—especially its father's darker nature.

I already knew that even before, but now, with someone to worry about, things were different and more complicated.

"Gustall?" Fendwyr's voice, closer now. "Are you ill?"

I quickly flushed the toilet and rinsed my mouth. Shit. He could sense what was going on with me? Then, I immediately thought that, of course, he knew. There was very little that escaped him.

"Just a headache," I called back, the lie coming easily again. I'd felt weird when I lied to him for the first time, but I was getting used to it. "It's just the stress, probably." I wished it was just that.

A pause. I couldn't help but wonder if he was going to call me out on the lie. If he did, I didn't know how I would answer. "Take better care of yourself. I need you focused."

Need, not want. The distinction wasn't lost on me. Fendwyr's possessiveness had grown even stronger since discovering the necklace was in Rodriguez's possession. He kept me close, watching my every move, yet seemed blind to the real reason for my changing scent and behavior. Or maybe he just didn't want to say it out loud. Not yet, anyway.

A few seconds later, when I emerged from the bathroom, the scene before me made my blood run cold. The informant, a beta barely older than me, lay crumpled in a corner. Blood trickled from his nose, and his fingers were bent at unnatural angles. My goodness…

Fendwyr stood over him, not a hair out of place, adjusting his cufflinks as if he'd just finished a business meeting rather than a torture session. And to him, that was what he most likely thought.

"Did he talk?" I asked, trying to keep my voice steady, though it wasn't working.

"Eventually." Fendwyr's smile was all predator. "Rodriguez is moving the necklace tonight. We'll be ready." He turned to me, his expression softening. "You look pale. More so than usual."

"I'm fine." Another lie. The metallic smell of blood was making my stomach turn again. It was bad.

He crossed the room in three long strides, gripping my chin. "You've been 'fine' for days now. Perhaps I should have the doctor examine you."

Panic flared in my chest. What was I going to do?

"No! I mean... it's nothing serious. Just stress and lack of sleep." But those things, by themselves, could be worrisome.

His eyes narrowed, but before he could press further, one of his lieutenants burst in.

"Boss! Rodriguez's men were spotted at the south warehouse."

Fendwyr's grip tightened before releasing me. "Gather the team. We move now." He turned back to me. "Stay here."

"But—"

"That's an order." His voice dropped to a growl that made my omega instincts want to submit. "I won't risk you near Rodriguez."

I watched him leave, my hand moving to my stomach again. The beta in the corner groaned, drawing my attention. I couldn't do anything to help him.

"He'll kill them all," he mumbled through bloody lips. "Rodriguez's men, the dealer, anyone who gets in his way. That's what he does."

"Shut up," I snapped, but the words hit home. I knew he was right, even though I didn't want to admit it out loud.

What kind of world was I bringing this child into? A world of violence and power plays, where its father tortured people in meeting rooms and ordered executions as easily as others ordered coffee.

Yet even as these thoughts tormented me, I could hear gunfire in the distance. Despite Fendwyr's orders, I found myself moving toward the sound, drawn by an inexplicable need to know, to see, to understand what kind of alpha was fated to be my mate—and my child's father.

I wished I didn't have to know, but my mind didn't work that way.

From the second-floor window, I had a clear view of the warehouse yard. Fendwyr moved like a force of nature, his men falling in behind him with perfect precision. He only let people he trusted by his side.

When Rodriguez's people opened fire, the response was swift and merciless.

I watched, one hand pressed against the glass, the other protectively over my stomach, as Fendwyr executed three men who tried to surrender. His face showed no emotion, no hesitation—just cold, efficient violence, and I never expected any different.

"Beautiful, isn't he?"

I spun around to find Jake, one of Fendwyr's most trusted lieutenants, watching me. He almost worshiped my mate.

"He ordered you to stay inside," he continued, his tone carefully neutral. He didn’t want any conflict with me.

"I needed to see," I whispered, turning back to the window. "I needed to know..."

"What kind of monster you're mated to?" Jake finished. "He does what's necessary to protect what's his. Including you."

Below, the gunfire had stopped. Fendwyr stood among the bodies, giving orders as calmly as if he were directing traffic. Blood stained his expensive suit, yet he seemed unbothered by it.

My stomach lurched again, though this time it wasn't morning sickness. This was the father of my child—a man who could order torture, execute surrendering enemies, and then come home to hold me like I was the most precious thing in his world.

And I knew he thought I was, but I didn't know if that was a positive thing or a negative one.

"You should get back to his office," Jake suggested. "Before he realizes you disobeyed. You don't want that to happen, do you?"

I nodded, unable to tear my eyes away from the scene below. As if sensing my gaze, Fendwyr looked up, his eyes meeting mine through the window. Even at this distance, I could see his expression darken.