47. Stick To My Heart, Blade To My Throat
47
STICK TO MY HEART, BLADE TO MY THROAT
RORY
M atteo only allows me to leave his house for private sessions with Karina and for Belles practice. He forced me to tender my resignation at the Chill Zone. And he thwarts my attempts to return to the Kostalova mansion at every turn.
He’s also monitoring my phone. He replaced my cell the very next day with one of his own that I know he’s bugged.
Dark circles ring my eyes. I haven’t been sleeping well. The purple and blue bruises on my ribs make it hard to get comfortable. At least they are fading from my skin. Hopefully, the pain fades soon too.
Without the cash I have saved, I don’t know what to do. I’m pissed off at myself for not seeing the ambush coming. I should have kept it on me, or in a locker at the rink. Along with the go-bag I have hidden, currently tucked deep in my closet at the mansion. I didn’t have much saved, but I was sure I could stretch it if I was frugal. Really frugal.
Using my cards is out of the question; they can be traced in a second. And any cash withdrawals require a signature from my father.
It’s a long shot either way, but I need money if I want to have any kind of chance.It’s imperative I get away before Matteo and I are married. Before he legally owns me.
Seeing him all buddy-buddy with the police commissioner the other night didn’t settle my nerves any either.I know once I run, I’m on my own.Neither my family nor the police will help me.
I’ll also never skate again, I know the only reason Matteo’s even allowing me to practice right now is because we aren’t married yet; needing to appease my father. But once we are, all bets are off. Bye-bye Olympics. It’s a hard reality to wrap my mind around, though strangely, I think I’m more distraught over losing the Belles.
It’s stupid, but skating with the Belles, and for the Breakers, has reminded me how much fun skating can be. I love being part of the squad, part of a team, and sort of having friends for the first time.
I’ve been looking forward to the game tonight all week. It will be my last one. Either I’m already gone, or Matteo will make me quit the second we say “I do.”
Sitting in the locker room, listening to the other girls excitedly chatting, is bittersweet. I’m quiet; more so than usual. Focused on lacing up my skates. There’s no chance for escape tonight. Though, I’ve considered it—slipping away mid-game. But Matteo has five of his guys on me tonight. I’ve got a better chance of getting struck by lightning—inside the arena.
“Rory.” Shelby, the Belles’ coach, calls me over from her office at the other end of the locker room. “A word?”
“Yeah?”
“Liv twisted her ankle in warmups.”
I wince. Sucks for Liv, but Shelby’s looking at me expectantly. “Okay..?” Not quite sure why she’s telling me…
“I need you on the ice for the Anthem and coin toss with Elle.”
“Oh, I—Umm….” Each game, the two cheer captains accompany the two Breakers captains to center ice. Liv is a captain, alongside Elle.
“You’ll be fine,” she reassures me. “Just follow Elle. She knows what to do.” And then she trots off, already decided.
“C’mon, c’mon, c’mon,” Elle urges, running up to me, clearly already briefed by Shelby on the change of plans. “We need to be on the ice like right now.”
Quickly, I tie off my skates and take one last look in the mirror before we race down the hall into the tunnel, rubber guards protecting our blades.
“Rory, Rory wait!”
I skid to a stop, spotting Shelby racing after us. Elle bounces from one foot to another impatiently beside me.
“Shelby, what?” I blurt out, half turned to keep running down the tunnel with Elle.
“Your jersey!!”
I look down to see her waving another Breakers jersey at me.
“I… okay.” I thrust my pom-poms into Elle’s hands. I quickly strip off the cropped jersey I’m wearing, and take the one from Shelby, sliding it on over my sports bra.
“Now go-go-go!” She half shoves me up the tunnel ramp like she wasn’t the one to delay me in the first place. We make it to the ice gate just in time. Elle jumps in next to Rez Tyler, the Breakers’ co-captain, leaving me next to— oh fuck.
Aidan glances down from where he stands to my left. His eyes are cold and unfriendly. The chill in his expression cuts straight through me, and I almost shiver. I haven’t seen him since… the penalty box.
“Hi…” I say, hesitantly,testing the waters.
His eyes darken and a muscle tightens in his jaw, but he doesn’t return my greeting. Instead, he steps out onto the ice without me.
I scramble to follow. “I’m filling in for Liv.” I have to work to catch up to him. Confused, since we’re supposed to skate together.
It wasn’t exactly the greeting I expected after what happened between us in the penalty box last week, but alrighty then. I don’t waste another breath on the surly Breakers defenseman as I take up my spot next to him at center ice; Elle and Rez to our right as we wait for the other team’s captains to take the ice.
“You’re wearing my number.” He sounds… Pissed ?Yes, that’s definitely irritation I’m sensing radiating in my direction.
His comment takes me by surprise since I thought he was ignoring me. I feign being preoccupied with the pom-poms in my hands, covertly scanning my eyes over the #19 patch on the shoulder of the jersey. I must have missed it when Shelby shoved it at me a few minutes ago. “Not my first choice.” I look away before closing my eyes at the realization that I have Aidan’s name and number scrawled across my back. Awesome.Might as well put “puck bunny” on the ass, too.
The refs are still over by the bench, discussing something with the other team’s coaches. The arena is full of noise but yet the silence between Aidan and me is deafening. I shuffle my skates back and forth on the ice, anxiously playing with my pom-poms, willing the refs to move their asses and get this coin toss over and done with.
This is stupid . I’m engaged and actively planning a runaway attempt. Fully aware nothing could ever—and should never—happen between Aidan O’Rourke and me. But still, his obvious rejection stings. I chew my bottom lip to keep the hurt from showing on my face. It was just a hook-up. But we—and I—what we did... I can feel my cheeks heating up. Maybe he was just messing with me the whole time…
The refs finally get their shit together and the Anthem plays. The song is far longer than I remember. I shift my weight on my skates, eager to get this over with and get far away from Aidan.
The Irish Devil himself seems to sense this and leans in closer. He chuckles darkly, “Do I make you nervous, Kostalova?” There’s a bitter edge to his voice, and he’s using my last name again.
I mumble something noncommittal, keeping my eyes straight ahead, fixed on Rez as he steps forward to make the call for the coin. I can feel Aidan’s gaze burning into my cheek.
“I have a fiancé,” I blurt out. Granted, not one I want, but all the same… I don’t want him to think I’m going full puck bunny on him.Just because we hooked up once doesn’t mean he has to be a colossal dick about it.
“I am aware.” Aidan’s tone is even icier, if it was even possible.
“Well, then…good.” His stare burns through me, intense and consuming, like standing too close to an open flame.
Rez calls the coin flip. I don’t hear the outcome. The surrounding crowd erupts in cheers and music blasts out through the surrounding speakers. I lift my pom-poms, faking the smile on my face, following Elle’s lead, all while counting the seconds until I can escape out from under the scrutiny of the devil beside me.
The second she turns, I high tail it for the bench, pulling Elle with me, but we’re stopped by one photographer blocking the gate. “O’Rourke! Tyler!” He shouts over our heads to get the attention of the two Breakers captains. “A photo?”
The boys oblige, and Elle and I try to sneak around them.
“Girls too!” The photographer blocks us with his arm, motioning for the two of us to join the guys where they’re posed.
Elle and I exchange a look before skating to either side, with the guys between us.
The photographer quickly snaps a few shots before peering at us over his lens, groaning. “C’mon, guys… like you like each other…”
I glance nervously at Elle, unsure what the photographer wants us to do, but then I feel a heavy weight circle around my neck. I stiffen with the contact. A jolt of something indiscernible shoots through me at the sound of Aidan’s dark voice in my ear. “Smile for the camera, Angel,”he purrs softly.
I land a sharp jab of my elbow in between pads and smile big at the resounding grunt above me. “Speak for yourself, puck boy.”
I’m out from under him the second the camera snaps its photo. I shove past the photographer and flee through the gate. A prickle of awareness tingles along my spine. He’s following me. Aidan is hot on my skates, following me down into the tunnel.
“Did you know?”he calls from behind me.
I slow, turning with a slight attitude, “Know what Aidan?”I’m so over whatever the hell this is. I just want away from him.
Aidan’s hand wraps around my upper arm, and I find myself redirected into a tiny alcove. There isn’t a lot of space, so he pushes me up against the wall. He releases my arm, only to lean in, both hands pressed against the concrete at my back—caging me in.
Back on the rink, the Breakers’ hype music signals the start of warm-ups; warm-ups we should both be on the ice for. But Aidan doesn’t even seem to notice, his eyes nearly black when I finally look up into them.
“Adrik Kostalov ordered the hit, killing my father… Did you know?” His dark eyes search mine with a deep intensity, and my breath stutters as I play catch up. “This whole time… Did you know?”
I take longer than a second to find my voice, held captive by the murderous expression in Aidan’s eyes, but he’s already shaking his head.
“I—”
“You know what? Save it.” He pushes off the wall and out of my airspace. My lungs take in their first full breath in at least a minute. But I’m still pinned to the wall by his glare alone, even as he backs away. There’s a cold and distant look in his eyes that makes the hair on the back of my arms stand up.
“This is war, Kostalova. War .” And then he turns and disappears down the tunnel.
My deep breaths level out and I sink with my back against the wall, my entire body shaking.
I didn’t know. I didn’t.
And why do I care so much that he thinks I did?