Chapter 72
DARCY
It didn’t take longfor Conrad and me to make some excuse that we needed to head over to my house and grab something before completing the set up. I unlocked the door and let him in, knowing I would need to freshen up before the two of us got into anything physical.
“Your place looks the same,” Conrad said from my couch. It was odd, the way he pointed that out, because truthfully, my house did look the same, and yet for some reason it felt completely different. Maybe I needed to paint something? Or maybe tear down a wall? A hammer through one would be the perfect outlet for my rage.
“Yeah, I was thinking about painting it.”
Better start small.
“How’s work going?” I called to him from the kitchen as I grabbed a couple of glasses of lemonade. It was so hot, I was pretty sure my sweat was sweating. I was trying to find conversation to relieve the nerves I had growing in my stomach. This was something that never happened with Conrad. He was easy and familiar. There were no expectations. He knew I wasn’t interested in anything long term, and I knew he was heading back to the other side of the country in a matter of days. It was always like that. Conrad blew in like a nice breeze and was out before you got the chill. Tonight, though, everything felt different. I felt a guilty knot in my stomach for being in my house with him, and I didn’t want to. Conrad was safe. Conrad was the guy whose name was on Lover’s Lane with mine and crossed out three or four times. I shouldn’t feel guilty for being with him. Especially when the reason I felt guilty no longer existed.
There was nothing left between me and Penn.
I cursed myself silently in the kitchen for the hold Penn had on me, and I refused to feel remorseful for having fun with Conrad when I owed Penn absolutely nothing. I took a drink from the glass, puckering my lips at its slight tartness before heading back to the living room.
Conrad answered. “It’s good. Busy. People are always sick. Job security I guess.”
I walked out and handed him a glass. I sat down next to him, and he scooted in closer, one hand around his glass and the other on my thigh. I felt my breath catch in my throat, and I sat still. “That’s good.” I took a sip.
His hand moved further up my leg, and he leaned over me. His face was mere inches from mine, his breath hot on my neck.
“Let me just run and freshen up a bit. It’s hot outside, and I think I’m sweating in just about every crevice a person can sweat in.” I stood up and immediately regretted using the word crevice.
“Yeah, okay.” Conrad leaned back and took a drink of his lemonade. “I’ll be here.”
I stepped into my bathroom and checked my phone.
I wasn’t sure why I did it. There had been no chime, no ring, no indication anyone was trying to get ahold of me at all. Nothing. So, what was I expecting? What did I want? I clicked the screen black and began cleaning up. I spritzed on some body spray to ensure I didn’t smell like a linebacker before I went back into the living room and sat down next to Conrad. Maybe Lettie was right. Maybe all I needed was to remember there were other people in the world. Other men who did not lie and try to ruin the town I loved so much. There were nice guys out there.
“Where were we?” he asked. His mouth came down onto me, and he forced his tongue into my mouth. I tried to relax, but my body was tense and rigid.
I could do this. Conrad was familiar.
I could relax.
I had nothing to feel bad about.
Conrad slipped his shirt off, and his hands found his way up mine. “I don’t think I can wait any longer, Darcy.”
His mouth was all over me. My neck, my jaw, and back to my lips as he fumbled with his pants. I opened my eyes, still kissing him as though it were a chore, and realized there was not one ounce of desire in my body. It was then I concluded I couldn’t let this go any further. There was no reason to force something I wasn’t sure I wanted, and I was formulating a plan on how to break it gently to Conrad when my phone rang.
I pulled away. “I should get that.”
“Let it go to voicemail.” Conrad started to kiss me again.
I pushed him off me slightly. “No, I should really get it.” I reached for my phone but dropped it instantly. I leaned over, trying not to fall as Conrad held on to my belt loop, working to slip them off my hips. When I finally grabbed hold of it, the phone had stopped ringing. I got back up on the couch and looked at the name of my missed call, not minding that Conrad had gone right back to trying to eat me alive.
“Penn,” I whispered, but thankfully Conrad hadn’t heard me. Although, I’m not entirely sure it would have changed anything if he had.
“See, it went to voicemail.” He started kissing my neck, his hands running the length of my body. My head was everywhere but in the moment. It was spinning, a thousand thoughts swarming, and all I wanted to do was call Penn.
I pushed him away from me. “Conrad, I’m really sorry, but I can’t.”
He sat back. “What’s wrong?” he asked, but I had the feeling he didn’t really care. His lips were red and raw, and he had a hunger in his eyes.
What’s wrong?
That was a good question. Was it that my entire body seized up the moment I saw Penn’s name on my phone? Or the fact I suddenly wanted to throw Conrad out of my house? Or maybe what was wrong was I was torn between absolutely hating someone and hoping to hear their voice.
Yeah, it didn’t make sense to me either.
“It’s...complicated. I’m really sorry. I know this is kind of our thing, but I just can’t do it this time.”
Conrad wiped his mouth with his hand, reaching for his shirt. “Oh, yeah. It’s okay.”
“Really?” I asked, thankful for his understanding.
“Yeah,” he replied, buttoning his pants back. “I should have told you I was coming. I couldn’t because Jenna was with me the whole time, and I didn’t want her to be suspicious.”
My eyes grew wide, and I scooted back quickly. “Jenna? Who is Jenna?”
Conrad reached for his phone and said nonchalantly, “My wife.”
It was so matter-of-fact that I almost didn’t register what he had said, but when I did, I felt my blood boil. I felt the rage build up in my chest, and I jumped back even farther from him.
“I’m sorry. Your wife? You’re married?” I closed my eyes. “Why would you come here if you’re married!” I raised my voice, growing angrier by the minute.
He shrugged. “Like you said, it’s kind of our thing.”
I scoffed, disgusted he would think I would have sex with a married man. “Not when you’re married! I am not that kind of person!”
“It’s not that big of a deal. She’ll never know, and I was desperate for a good time. She’s been so boring lately. She’s pregnant and—”
I threw a pillow at him from the couch, standing up and screaming, “Get the fuck out!”
There might be nice guys out there, but Conrad Taylor was a giant fucking asshole.